"I know what you're saying, you don't want to hurt somebody because how you've been brought up." Sarge said understandingly. "But remember, I wasn't brought up like you. I was taught to respect people, sure, but only to people who deserve it. Like you and your family. Gary is an AI. Not only is he not a person, but he sure as hell doesn't deserve any respect."
"Ah guess." Big Mac nodded.
"I'm not telling you this for you to side with me. I'm telling you this because I want to do it my way, and I want you to accept that."
"Ah do." Big Mac nodded again. "Which is why ah think ya'll should do the same when ah do things my way."
"Ya'll are yappin' like a bunch a fillies!" Granny Smith chuckled loudly, turning to them. "How 'bout this middle ground. Big Mac, don't help Gary. Sarge, don't hinder him."
Sarge and Big Mac shrugged at each other and nodded, when the door front door open and Applejack came in with some flour and other baking ingredients on her back.
"Ah, just in time!" Granny Smith smiled when Applejack walked next to Granny Smith, allowing her to take the ingredients off of Applejack's back.
"What are ya staring it?" Applejack asked, smile on her lips. "Jealous that ah managed to get here faster than you could've?"
"Wheres Gary?" Sarge asked, coming off rather harsh.
"What are ya talkin' about? Didja forget that he decided to stay and work with ya?" Applejack laughed, but face her face was serious. "Did you lock him in the barn and forget?"
"Eenope, he gave up after his third try to go help ya in Ponyville..." Big Mac said quietly, glancing uneasily at Sarge, awaiting an I told you so.
"God dammit." Sarge hissed instead, sprinting to the door.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Gary kept a steady pace as he walked through Ponyville with disgust, feeling ashamed to be walking amongst the filthy shisnos. He felt ripples of disappointment when he remembered his location, but at the same time felt conniving. Felt like himself. Some ponies walked near him since he looked lost, but whenever they did he walked faster than them, not wanting to interact, even if he didn't know where exactly his destination was. He did not want to accept help from any of them, lest he dirty himself. Soon, however, he found his destination. A tall building, sitting right in the middle of Ponyville.
"The hive mind of Shisnoville..." Gary muttered to himself as he looked at town hall. "I feel sick just being here."
Gary took a deep breath. He would need all his courage just to step through into where he felt most shisnos have been. At least at the farm they weren't running around everywhere like ants. Gary looked up and walked to the door, opening it with vigor, but not so much that anybody would believe he had anything bad planned. He peeked inside to see a tan pony, sitting at a desk. Her hair was in waves, giving her a less formal, but still respectable demeanor. Gary coughed lightly to inform her of hi location.
"Hello, may I help you?" Mayor Mare asked, giving Gary her formal smile.
"Just admiring the scenery." Gary said.
"There isn't much to see in here." Mayor Mare said politely, looking at Gary with interest. "I can't place your accent, where are you from?"
"Excuse me, I often lose my manners around shi- such delightful ponies." Gary finished off hesitantly, cringing on the inside as the he forced a heavy smile. "Believe me when I say you most probably would not have heard where I came from."
"I generally like to think that I'm well versed on locations in this world. You don't become mayor for nothing. Even if I have never heard of it, I would still like to know the name."
"Oh, well, er..." Gary trailed off edgily, knowing he needed to think of a legitimate sounding one. One that sounded as stupid as Ponyville. "Uh... Minneighsota."
"Ah, Minneighsotta!" Mayor Mare chuckled, extending her hoof again.
Gary shook her hoof, now convinced that the shisnos living here are unoriginal.
"I've never met a Minneighsotian, seeing as it's such a long ways from little old Ponyville." Mayor Mare said thoughtfully. "What brings you here? Business?"
"Of sorts." Gary said, carefully continuing his smile. "I moved here as of late, and I was just-"
"You're living here?" Mayor Mare asked with surprise. She walked up to a book on her desk and started flipping through it. "What's your name?"
"Neigh." Gary sputtered, knowing he would need a pony sounding name.
"Neigh?" Mayor Mare asked with an unsure glance.
"Yes, it's short for Neighoming."
"But that's a name of a state."
"My parents were never the brightest." Gary admitted, smartly showing his side to her. "Hence why I prefer to keep it short. My parents were also the reason I no longer have my mark. When I was young, I was in an accident involving them. Though that is actually why my voice is as charming as it is as well though, so it was not all bad."
"Alright, Neighoming from Minneighsota." Mayor nodded, writing a new entry. "I do not have you listed in here for some reason, so I will have to fix that. Do you live on your own?"
"No, I am currently residing with the Apple family. I actually came by yesterday."
"Ah, the Apples. Nice bunch of ponies. They really know how to work." Mayor Mare said respectfully. "Did Granny Smith tell you how she was here when Ponyville was first established?"
"No, she didn't." Gary said, slightly impressed, but acting way more impressed than he really was. "I will have to ask her about that when I get back."
"Is Sarge from Minneighsota too?" Mayor mare asked, looking at the list of residents of Sweet Apple Acres.
"Er, no. But we have known each other for a while." Gary said truthfully.
"Family?"
"No." Gary said hastily.
"I see. What was your past job in Minneighsota?"
"Oh, that. I was actually helping the mayor there." Gary said, putting his smiling into overdrive. Now was where his plan shifted into second gear. "Which is actually what I came here to talk to you about. I was wondering if you had any openings for assistants?"
"I like to think that I could handle this by myself..." Mayor Mare said dubiously. "What is your experience?"
"Well, I helped for roughly twenty-five years. I was going to run for mayor, but decided to live less loud of a life. But the politics still run thick in my blood, so I figured being an assistant in such a nice place as this would be lovely."
"Twenty-five? How old are you?"
"I am forty years old." Gary said slowly, feeling his cover may have been blown.
"You look younger." Mayor Mare said sincerely. "When you walked in I thought you were in your early twenties."
"Right back at you." Gary said with a tactical wink.
Mayor Mare was taken aback. She was always treated with respect, but she never particularily felt she would be treated like that.
"Even though I do feel I could handle this on my own, having such an experienced pony by my side is too tempting to ignore." Mayor Mare said with a flushed nod. "Welcome aboard."
"When can I start?" Gary asked, feeling confidence overwhelm him.
"Today is already over. Is tomorrow too early?"
"No, I could do tomorrow." Gary said, smiling pleasantly, turning to leave.
"Great. We will talk about your times and your pay then." Mayor Mare said, walking to the door with him, both out of her politeness and out of slight fondness.
"Sounds delightful. I am sure the Apples will be most pleased with this news. They aren't making as much money as they should be." Gary said, trying to act appreciative, as if her accepting his offer was more for them than it was for him.
"That they aren't." Mayor Mare agreed. "They are hard workers, and are some of the most respectable ponies I know."
"Indeed." Gary said slowly as he walked out the door, not liking being so close and friendly with the shisnos. But it was necessary. "See you tomorrow?"
"Tomorrow." Mayor Mare said, shaking his hoof one more time.
Mayor Mare watched as Gary walked away happily. Mayor Mare thought it was because he was happy to have been a part of the community now, when he was really happy only because his plan was now set in motion.
Stupid shisnos.
1070566 i dont care i would still try to be friends with all of them i want to be friends with tex so bad
Gary in Public Office, it was what he was born to do.
What Gary is probably thinking
nioutaik.fr/images/galerie/i-run-this-shit.jpg
Damnit Gary-_-
How many punches does it take to knock out Gary?
One
*punches Gary*
allright he's actualy trying to be good and trying to belong or he's really really really deciteful most likely the lather but any ways gary got a job so congrats gary
data.whicdn.com/images/2381384/Gary_the_snail_large.gif
"You have the right to remain shisnoy, shisno!"
"You have the right to remain shisno!"
nice. even though i like sweet apple acres its nice to have a change of scenery
I defiantly thought he would just posses the mayor...
1070800 You have the right to remain a Shizno. Everything you say will remind me that you are still a Shizno. You have the right to a Shizno attorney, even though it'll probably fuck up.
1070780 No, all it takes is a stare. A flutter stare.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH ALL THOSES CHAPTERS !!!
1070878
That was actually my thoughts for his cutie mark. "I AM EPSILON. AND THIS..." points hoof around the world. "IS THE EPSILON UNIT. HERE, I AM GOD. AND YOU. ARE NOT. WELCOME HERE."
-Katherine has been banned from Epsilon server.-
-Omega has been banned from Epsilon server-
-Sigma has been banned from Epsilon server-
-Gamma has been banned from Epsilon server-
-Tucker has been banned from Epsilon server-
-Caboose has been banned from Epsilon server-
"Finally, peace and quiet..."
"Why'd caboose have to go...?"
"And Tucker?"
"You're a meanie pants."
"Alright. Fine."
-Tucker is no longer banned from Epsilon server-
-Caboose is no longer banned from Epsilon server-
gary is about to put Nixon to shame XD
1070984
or would that be Neighxon?
1070986
I was waiting for that!
1070772
Your comment made my day!
1070979
no it would be more like "Tucker has been forcibly pulled out of the server"
tucker-booooowwwwwww chiiiiiiickaaaaaaa boooooowwwwwww woooo ~end transmition~
here's my thoughts on this
Hahaha, the artificial intelligence of DECEPTION...working in POLITICS...there was a joke about that earlier but I thought it was nothing, nice job there! This is a clever idea of what to do with Gamma.
whats this? o.0 public office what'll sarge say -.- oh boy good chapter! xD
...
Aww, shit son! Gary MOTHERFUCKING OAK!
1071038
Oddly enough...it fits.
I'm scared now.
Hehe its not boring anymore!!
cant believe i caught up to the most current chapter..i started reading like 2 days ago
1071038
Gary so perfectly fits politics that it is frightening.
I assume O'Malley will be stuck with someone like Iron Will, then... oh, shit.
I would hate to find out what Sigma does.
1070979
Katherine? don't you mean Allison (Tex)
also
"Neighoming? but that's the name of a state!"
was that a reference to the Freelancer Wyoming perhaps?
1073880
No, Katherine, the woman who was gored to death with Church's horn because she killed Caboose.
My idea of Church getting his cutie mark was that he was going to unlock a god mode, and kick her out of the Epsilon Unit.
Seeing as how he's Epsilon, and this is his unit.
I figure Gary is being Gary the Shisno's won't let him do what he want's so he goes behind their backs as usual he actually does want a job if only to get sarge BM and AJ off his back.
So he goes and get's one he might actually want to do.
1073880
Yessum.
1073940
Her name is Carolina.
The latest update isnt coming trough.
Actually, Gary wouldn't be that great in politics. I mean he's great at lying, but how good is he at spouting bullshit?
hey! I'm from Minneighsota! Come to think of it, I live near a city called St. cloud. I wonder if it's the Minneighsota equivalent too Cloudsdale...
It might just be me, but I have a hunch that Gary will end up genuinely working for Ponyville town hall.
hell yeah Gary is a genius.
I have a feeling that Gary is slowly climbing his way to the top, TO RULE ALL OF EQUESTRIA
POLITICS!
i don't care what they said i would beat the ever loving shit out of gary, he is so annyoing
past 3 chapters boring, boring, boring......GARY! FINALLY SHITS STARTING TO GO DOWN!!!
Gary for some reason is pissing me off. I think Omega would like it if I strangle him.(starts strangling Gary)
Neighoyming
Agent Wyoming
I see what you did there
Gary... Dafuq r u doin'... Gary... STAHP!
2825599 dont worry, i have my plasma caster locked onto him with an E.M.P. bolt.
1394396 the newest verb aside from SCIENCE!
I never liked Gary in Red vs Blue, but this has made me flat out hate him.
Where's my shotgun?!... What do you mean "I never had one"?!... *sigh* Fine. I guess I'll just settle for my bat.
ms mayor... YOU HAVE MADE THE WIEARST MISTAKE IN THE HISTORY OF Cabose
3362848ill let you use my m-107a-1. Its a Barrett.
Well, someone get me a halo shotgun because I need it to take care of Gamma *carepackage that has a halo shotgun comes out of no where* THanks discord, I can now kick his ass *pumps shotgun*
Attention Freelancer AI designation Gamma: attempting to fuck with Ponyville is the biggest mistake you'll ever make.
Couldn't have tried out for Discord's secretary, could he?