Three million years from Equestria. The EMC mining ship Red Dwarf. Its only crew members are: Dash Whizzter, the last remaining pony; Twilight Glimmer, a hologram of her bunkmate; and a creature that evolved from the ship's dragon. I am PINKY, the ship's computer - I have an IQ of 6,000. That's the same IQ as 6,000 PE teachers. Or the same as 12,000 traffic wardens.

Author's note: Hello all! This is a "Red Dwarf" crossover that I've been meaning to do for a little while. If you haven't watched the original sitcom then you really should do - it's demonstrably one of the finer examples of comedy to come out of the UK. I apologize if anyone who has seen the original gets mad at me for doing this - this is more of an experiment than anything else.

Rated Teen for an eensy-weensy bit of death. Otherwise this is pretty kid-friendly. :P

A bizarre incident involving an exploding pig at the Carousel Boutique leaves Rarity in shock and unable to work. Twilight keeps her nice and comfy at the library, but Rarity still has duties to fulfill. Somepony will have to take her place for a few days. Shenanigans ensue.

Also, obligatory author's note:
Good morrow, fellow FIM fictionwriters! This be my first pony-oriented fiction, so I sincerely hope you enjoy it. :D I've been a fan of FIM since July 2011, and I love a good bit of creative writing (and reading :P) - but only recently did I think that I needed to write a little something about our favorite pint-sized equines. Cheers to my brother for helping out with the ideas process, and proofreading it. He's got a fic of his own in the works, so look out for that one soonish, I guess. :P