"The Everfree Forest!?!"
"That's what I said Dasher, the Everfree Forest."
"But captain! Why do we have to follow her? She said-"
"I don't really care what she said. Our first priority is the princess' safety, and since it doesn't appear that Bastion reported us, we will continue to follow her until... well, we'll just follow her, and that’s the end of that."
"There they are!" Stonehoof's eyes were closed but his extended hoof was tracking in a slowly moving trace across a stretch of the forest.
Although difficult, if one looked where he was pointing they would see a purple alicorn and zebra moving nigh-invisibly in the dark forest.
"We'll follow them from a few dozen paces behind." Blue Blazer said as he began in the direction Stonehoof's scrying spell indicated.
"Well that didn't work! Any other bright ideas captain?" shouted Dasher.
"Shut it! We'd have been lost even sooner if it weren't for me!" the captain responded.
"Oh no we wouldn't! At worst we'd be lost in a few pints at the Ponyville bar! But no! You had to make us follow the princess against orders and out of our armor into the crazy forest!"
"Speak for yourself Dasher. Anyway, it looks like there is a light ahead, maybe it's where the Princess went.
"Such a weighty plea
I would not entree,
Were utmost speed
not in such desprate need."
"It's not a problem Zecora, really." Twilight reassured with a little trepidation. "It's the least I can do for a friend, I'm just happy to be able to help. It really is a lucky coincidence though, that I'd become an alicorn just in time to help you with this potion."
"Luck is not what I see,
T'was, as I'm sure you know, destiny."
"Well, uh, if you don't mind me asking, what is this potion for? I've never heard of a potion that mentions alicorn-specific ingredients..."
"It is a rare brew indeed,
One that serves a very special need.
Though the feathers of a pegasus would suffice,
those of an alicorn would work quite nice,
for the brew I now seek to make,
will serve a task it was not meant to take,
with a powerful sleeping spell,
a most fearful monster I seek to quell."
"What kind of monster?"
"You were right captain, they're in there!"
Blue Blazer grunted from exertion, he had the bottom position in the spying pony ladder this time. "And what are they doing?
"I think... I think... She's harvesting her body! She's taking the princess's feathers!"
"Then it's go time! Save the princess!"
"Just do it gently please, they're new and I'm not used to the sensations yet." Twilight asked from where she sat on the table. Zecora had a few choice feathers picked out and was carefully manipulating them away from the others for removal.
It was at that perfectly opportune moment that the front door to the hut was kicked hard enough to knock one of its hinges loose.
A quick sweep of the room that revealed many terrible things, bones, skulls, bubbling potions and smoking brews, terrifying masks and creepy candles, a zebra with a mouthful of feathers and a wide eyed alicorn.
"Don't worry princess we'll save-"
Twilight watched in shock as Zecora dropped the large cluster of feathers that had been unceremoniously ripped from her wing, and then looked to eyes of the Zebra who was also still processing what had just happened.
She risked a glance at her wing and immediately regretted it. She could see her down feathers in places that should only be visibly populated by critical-for-flight primary feathers.
After a few milli-seconds of processing she looked back to Zecora, who was still frozen in shock, and then to the true cause of the problem.
"...we'll save-" she blasted him with a stun spell, the other two were down less than a second later.
"Ugh... What happened? The princess!" Blue Blazer's eyes shot open as the events leading up to his unconsciousness replayed in his mind.
"Yeah... About that..." Dasher said as he peeked in from the kitchen, "She's gone."
"We've got to find her!"
"Nah, not really," he said coming out of the kitchen with a sandwich, "she left a note that says and I quote, 'Go home together once you're all awake. I'll be back to the library once my friend Zecora and I finish something.' and if you couldn't hear it, the 'friend' was underlined."
"Well, I guess it’s nothing to worry about then... huh... Where's Stonehoof?"
Dasher suddenly lost apparently even the concept of eye-contact "He's ...uh... nowhere! Nope! He's just nowhere. In fact, who is this Stonehoof? I've never heard of him..."
"Dasher, you are probably the worst liar since the element of honesty got Discorded. Now tell me, where is Stonehoof?"
"He's uh... Camping!"
"Dasher?"
"He went for a walk!"
"Dasher?"
"Sailing! Bowling! Hangliding!"
"Dasher!"
"Suba-diving!"
"Dasher!!! So help me Celestia!"
"He went off to find the Princess! He pretended to be knocked out by the princess's spell and listened as she and the Zebra talked. He overheard that the feathers that the princess was giving to her were being used to make an alicorn-class sleeping potion. The princess and the Zebra went out to use it."
"And what in the name of Discord do they need an alicorn-class sleeping potion for? I'm not a potions major, but anything made from alicorn should be way more than medicinal. Something that powerful should be able to knock out a celestial beast!"
"Well that's good I guess..."
"No... No... Please don't tell me..."
"A Lupus."
"BUCK! Why doesn't she just teleport into the sun! How about Cerebus's stomach? I swear she's TRYING to get herself killed! We're going after them!"
"Sir she specifically said-!"
"Buck what she wants! I'm tired of this! Celestia told me specifically to keep her student safe, and so help me I'm going to keep her safe! Despite her best efforts to the contrary! Let's go!"
"Pass me the blow gun princess." Stonehoof requested. He had caught up to the mares shortly after they left the hut, and rather than send him back and risk him getting lost, Twilight had begrudgingly allowed him to come along.
They currently sat outside the cave in which their prey dwelt.
"I really think Zecora can handle it." Twilight passed the hollow bamboo blow gun to its owner, who turned it away to Stonehoof.
"Although my aim is true,
I am likely not as quick as you,
I would make the shot,
but I fear I would be quickly caught.
If you desire to aid us now,
for you to shoot, I would allow."
"Ok then, but be careful, the potion should work quickly, but this hasn't been tried before, so we don't know for sure. If anything goes wrong just run and I'll deal with him."
"Yes princess." Stonehoof gave a final nod-bow to his charge and went into the cave.
"I sure hope the Lupus is asleep." Twilight said as she kept a concerned watch on the cave entrance.
"Do not fear my dear Twilight,
For the Lupus hunts at night
and through the day
It tucks away
Until the setting light."
"But it's starting to get dark right now? Shouldn't it be waking up soon?"
"Only when the stars are out
do celestial beasts roam about."
"Oh, then we're good."
"Unless, of course,
the are awoken by force..."
"Find anywhere they may have gone?" Blue Blazer asked after a little while of searching under the sun that was just now beginning to set.
"Are you serious? The Everfree is like a bazillion miles across! They could be anywhere! Let's just head back to the village already like the princess told us!"
"Your input is noted. Now, do you have anywhere they could have gone?"
"I think there's a large cave a ways back..."
"Good we'll look there first! Show me the way!"
"No, I'm sorry sir, but we are not spelunking in a random cave for the princess who could already be back in town by now! This is ridiculous!"
"Calm down! We're just going to go to the cave entrance, no further, and yell in to see if they're there, nothing more, and if they're not there, we'll head straight home to the library. Ok?"
"We're only going to yell inside?"
"Yep, only yell inside."
MY GOD THESE GUARDS ARE F****** DUMB!
I must ask though, is there going to be anything else besides the blunder of the guards that will drive the "story"?
2397791 Yes, that comes shortly, and I do appoligize that that has been the constant theme of the last few chapters consecutively, but it ends soon, and the story will progress.
Should be they're
2398010 Fixed! Thanks!
"Okay, you've come to a giant cave deep in the Everfree forest. What do you do?"
"I fire a Magic Missile!"
".......You really want to fire a magic missile into the giant dark cave that could hold anything?"
"Yeah, why?"
"Nooo reason." *Rolls the dice* "Congratulations, you've awoken a half dozen Celestial Beasts who are now charging you."
"Buck! Can I change my action?"
"Nope."
"BUCK!"
2398533 I cast summon bigger fish!
this has set itself firmly as one of my favorite fics. might could do with a little more imagery here or there, but it really has enough and moves along nicely.
2398600
*Rolls dice* wow, your summon worked, but you cant control it, and it also thinks you would make a nice appetizer.
2398997>>2398600
Wow, good job screwing us all over. I never intended to be digested by a fish, but it appears as if misfortune is in spades tonight.
2399344
so, how is my comment relavent to this reply?
2399411
It is not, I miss clicked horribly. Can you ever forgive me?
2399442
sure thing, was just confused is all. lol
2399501
Usually when I comment I use a picture to quickly identify the person I am commenting on; and since you and the one I wanted to reply to had the same avatar, I was befuddled.
2399511
tried to get an avatar pic but failed, sorry
nvm, different method worked :P haha
2399542
And it's Alicorn Twily! She looks so cute!
2399582
hell yeah princess twily is cute! on a more serious note though, i think we should stop cramming this story's comments with our BS convo lol
Okay, nothing good is going to come from this. Something tells me that the guards are going to be learning the Mane 6's old "Run Away From The Hydra" trick after they wake up the Lupus. Twilight has to take some blame though - she needs to understand that these guys are responsible for her and she needs to communicate with them.
Something tells me that these guards are completely unsuited for field operations. It must have been centuries since Celestia was last out in the field, working with her Little Ponies to resolve problems. In that time, the Guard has lost the psychology and experience needed to handle these situations. I'm beginning to wonder if Celestia has deliberately precipitated this situation, knowing that this is likely to happen, to get the guard to escape their mindset that 'stand still and look stoic' is the be-all and end-all of their duties.
Oh dear Ceelstia, those guards are so dead. XDDD
But Twi really needs to learn to behave more like a princess and less like the action student she used to be. And she needs to communicate with her guards more, ofc they will see danger everywhere after all Twi´s the only princess not living in a castle with lots of guards around them like Cadance/Luna/Celestia. And they dont know anypony of this village. Plus Celestia gave them the order to protect Twily, so ofc they will follow it to the core.
I think Twi got the hoofmaidens hoof down but with the guards she´d need a bit more knowledge about them to understand them better, they had trained many years to be able to give their lives for hers and they got the determination to do so, Twi needs to respect that as well as they need to learn to respect her private life.
Or else the captain will really become a drunkard to surpress all his worries for his princess safety while Twi will always have an headache. XDDD
Btw, when will all the stallions/mares come who want "Princess Twilight Sparkle" as mate? I mean, hello? We got a new princess, single and cute and very powerful plus good connections to the rest of the other princesses and "sister" of one of them. Twi would have by now hundreds of love letters or guys/girls showing up with flowers and such to woe her.
HERE her guards could come very in handy! :D
That would both for Twi and the guards a relief, for Twi cause she has more quiet time and less "please marry me!" time and for the guards cause they can feel useful for their princess. <3
And I'll bet we all know what cave they stumble upon.
Twilight you need to be a little more careful next time. Your guards are concerned about your safety and even though you are a princess the Everfree Forest is still a dangerous place, remember the cockatrice incident or what about the posion joke?
2399936>>2399616
It's not that she isn't trying to communicate with them, they aren't listening.
We don't have the details but we know they are the reason she hurt her leg earlier.
She told them to take the night off and leave her alone, they followed her and they are the reason she is now missing a patch of feathers.
She told them to go back to town, again they didn't listen and it looks like they are about to cause her more problems
Yes they are supposed to protect her, but by not listening to someone who knows better they are doing a horrible job at it. The other guards don't body check Celestia into a wall every time a door slams shut. When Twilight yelled at Shining none of the guards threw a spear at her.
2398600>>2398997>>2399344
*Takes out his flask*
Now I remember why I never wanted to GM a game, its because the lot of ya would drive me to drink!
*Takes a swig of mojito (mint) green tea*
......which...would probably mean something if I drank alcohol.
these guards.... well, at least they will either learn from their mistakes and actually follow orders after this, or they'll be taken off her guard detail...they do have twi's best in mind, so ill give them credit for that, but they should begin taking whom they're guarding exactly into consideration.
anyways, good chapter!
2399596
portalz0r and I flooded some fic's comment sections back in the day (I don't care how cliche that term is, I'm using it).
2400151
Looks like you have a drinking problem.
2400132
They were ready to do so though.^^
Besides they got their order to protect Twi not from Twily, but from Princess Celestia and i´d say she´s still the main ruler of Equestria so her word has more meaning for the guards than of the princess they´re supposed to protect.
The Captain still sees Twi as a "subejct", somebody he has to protect and despite being powerful has been in many close to death situations and would have been hurt if it weren´t for others help. And she got hurt alot in the show too and you didn´t needed an army for that, just Derpy.
So his worries and rationalisation of the situation makes sense for his position just as much as Twi´s annoyance and rationalisation of the situation from her POV. It´s why i mean they got a communication problem.
Best would be that both, Twi and the Captain, sit down, drink some tea and talk about how the guard duty should be handled the next days. Leaving Twi always alone is out of question, curbstoming her cause someone coughed as well.
Best solution would be a guard timeplan, one guard at the time guards and follows Twi and gets a item, best made by Twily, to call the others IF and only IF Twi and him gets into danger. That way Twi has only one guard to worry about and more and more of the grunt guards show that they got it that Ponyville is a harmless place and the Captain can feel more secure that he´s doing a good job at protecting his new princess as long as not suddenly an evil army of darkness rushes this place.
2400528
I believe you are referring to the spears? yes they got ready, but they didn't tackle Shining and charge Twilight. They let him talk to his sister.
Fewer guards means nothing if they still don't listen to her. If she stops and says. "Stay calm. There is about to be a bang, stuff falling out of the air and Pinkie will jump out of somewhere." Then there is a bang if fireworks, confetti falls out of the air and pinkie jumps out of a bush. Then Twi gets kicked onto a pile of lit fireworks in their attempt to protect her form Pinkie. Does it matter if there was 1 or 4 guards not doing as they were told?
And if something does happen, it's going to be her protecting them. What would they do against an Ursa or this Lupus? Best case is they stay back, most likely is they become that kid frozen in the middle of the street that the hero has to rescue, worst case is they get in her way.
2400752
Two things:
1. Shining´s the Captain, the big boss, of the guards. He doesnt get tackled, he tackles.
2. He reacted in 1.4 seconds the moment the guards reacted. They had just enough time to see where the voice is and to ready the spears and the next they were halted by Shinings "Twily". That and they surely have heard like a thousand stories from their captain about how he has the most adorable and smartest little sister in whole Equestria.
We never had a "this is Pinkie, she is known to often ponynap me." or "this is Zecora, i visit her often to help her with potions as well as to listen to her lessons about medition and Zen and whatnot.". Just "shut up, stay put and leave me the buck alone.", mostly.
Sure the guards are at fault for being paranoid loose rockets ready to go off at any time, then again, its not like their´s a new princess every week. What they have at hoof, is something no guard has experience with.
Against an Ursa/etc. Twi, at least in her Unicorn form, either run away or needed quite some time before being able to pull out a spell to deal with the situation. The guards could distract the monster or get Twi to safety or buy time with dodging its attacks so that Twi gets enough time to concentrate on her spell.
There´s stuff they can do, they´re trained for a reason after all.
Though so far the guards in the show did a poor job at being guards. XDDD
It is understandable that there could be ponies (just like some bronies) who wants nothing more than cut off Twi´s wings and cut her horn off, mostly cuase they believe she doesn´t deserve them.
After all, for all we know the other three have pretty much been there the whole time. Twi is a new kind of princess, one who ascended to her new position. Though many ponies cheer for their new princess there could be those who wants to harm her.
Who knows. The castle might have gotten mail in which the writers have threaten to hurt Twi which is the reason why Celestia wanted Twi to have guards with her even in peaceful Ponyville.
and here a couple of us were talking TIMBERwolves, a LUPUS is even BETTER!!!!!!!!! oh THIS is only going to end SO well
if these guys don't get hauled back to Canterlot by what's left from their ears with Twilight's brutal dragging (over EVERY thorn and cactus bush, hill and dell and who knows what else she can find) when they escape an enraged wolf, they MIGHT actually start to fit in since they'll now know to follow Twilight's instructions
2401066
And that's why I didn't say anything about pinkies kidnapping or AJ's tackle. In those cases they did what they were supposed to.
The one who decided to talk to her and actually listen to what she has to say is the one not causing her problems at the moment.
If she tells them to stand back and give her some room, they ignore her and get in her way and she gets hurt. Did they do the right thing?
Their dedication is admirable, but their lack of discipline makes them the biggest threat to her safety so far.
Keep up the good work thanks
They're like the pony version of the Keystone Cops.
Tonight, the Lupus shall dine on Royal Guard soup.