• Published 1st Feb 2013
  • 1,368 Views, 58 Comments

My Little Planetside - Alanox



Twilight convinces her friends to play a new MMOFPS by Pony Online Entertainment. Unfortunately, they've all picked separate sides. Hilarious violence ensues.

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Character Creation

“Aw, cmon Fluttershy, you gotta play!” The yellow Pegasus in question simply shrunk.

“It just seems so violent…”

“All of our friends are playing it, you can’t just back out!”

“Oh my… Even Rarity?”

“It wasn’t easy, but we managed to convince her to play.” Dash didn’t want to think about what she had to do to get Rarity on board. Modeling dresses was something no mortal mare should sit through…

“Oh, well, if you all are playing…”

“ALRIGHT! Trust me, we’re all gonna have a ton of fun. Make sure to look up what you can so you at least know what we’re getting into. Celestia knows Twilight has…”


All six friends prepared their headphones, microphones, and miscellaneous snacks before opening up a freshly downloaded HerdSpeak client and logging onto the server Twilight prepared for them. Unfortunately, it was apparent their meeting would not go as planned as soon as one of them spoke.

“So, we’re all playing Equestrian Republic, right?” came an athlete’s voice.

“What in tarnation are ya talkin’ ‘bout, Dash? I thought we were joinin’ the New Conglomareate!”

User muted. User muted.” Twilight’s admin commands acted with ruthless efficiency.

“Girls, please be reasonable. Everypony knows we’re fighting for the Luna Sovereignty.”

A loud gasp was audible over five mares’ speakers.

“Ohmigosh Twilight! We have to have our FREEDOM! The Equestrian Republic probably banned cake!”

User muted.

“I'm sorry, but I thought we were joining the Equestrians…”

User muted.

The channel was silent. Dash and Applejack fumed in front of their computer screens. Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy were concerned they did something to make Twilight angry. Only Rarity and Twilight had permission to speak anymore. The fashionista decided to use this time to inject her own thoughts.

“Twilight, I also believe we should play for the Luna, but maybe instead of muting everypony you could just use your lessons in friendship to convince them?”

Twilight sighed over the microphone.

“Alright. Listen, girls, I know we all mostly disagree on who to fight for, but we’re supposed to go as a team. If we split up we’ll all fail, and it might put holes in the beautiful friendship we’ve made. Alright?”

User-User-User-User Unmuted.

“So, with that out of the way, we’re playing Luna Sovereignty, right?”

And in a moment of surprising collaboration, four mares responded collectively,

“NO!”


Half an hour later, the number of groups in the Herdspeak channel tripled. One with a librarian and a fashionista, one with a baker and a farmer, and one with an athlete and an animal-lover.

“So, Pinkie, you ready ta fight fer freedom?”

“Am I ever! Ohmygosh we’re gonna get some sweet guns and we’ll shoot them and earn our right for cupcakes and cake and pie and fritters and Danishes and croissants and OH MY GOSH what do those Equestrians have to EAT?!”

“I dunno. Oatmeal?”

“OATMEAL? ARE YOU CRAZY?!”

“How ‘bout we play the game already? The launcher ain’t the most interestin’ thing ta look at…”

“Um… Rainbow Dash? I don’t know what to do…”

“Have you launched the game yet?”

Silence.

“M…maybe?”

The sound of a hoof making abrupt contact with a forehead sounded into Fluttershy’s speakers.

“Rarity, the character creator isn’t nearly as important as you make it out to be…”

“Wrong! I have a chance to reshape my image! Sure, there may only be gender, mane color and coat color options, but I must do what I can to make sure I look fashionable in combat.”

“At least I don’t have to sit and wait for you to customize your vehicles…”

“You can customize vehicles?!”


Twilight’s hooves hit the floor of the Reconstruction Chamber. He white coated unicorn lifted her XM98 Sniper Rifle to the right of her pink mane. Rarity’s character emerged, sporting the same colors as its creator. Rarity brought up an Artemis Scout Rifle and the two ponies proceeded into the massive shielded Warp Gate. Scythes appeared to bathe in the desert sun around the central building as Magriders amassed and Galaxies loaded up lines of waiting ponies. Twilight pulled up her map and checked for territory that seemed like it was begging for such an invasion fleet. She placed a message in chat.

TheBookinator: Might I inquire where this substantial collection of forces will be departing?

Only a moment later, another player quickly answered.

HumansAreReal: The Luna Archives has been captured by the Equestrian Republic. We plan to take it back in the name of the Luna.

“Twilight, that’s pretty far away from here. How are we going to get there?”

“I think I know. Apparently it’s called a Flash.”

Rarity gazed over at a pony driving an ATV in circles.

“As long as we’re not driving whatever that pony is driving. It looks silly and it’ll get the wind in my character’s mane.”

“About that…”


“Pinkie, I’m not sure that that’s what yer supposed ta do with a
Galaxy.”

The pink pony in question was performing near impossible flips and spins in a fully loaded Galaxy, Applejack’s Vanguard observing from a safe distance. She pitied the poor ponies whose screens had to be filled with the spinning dropship’s ever-rotating camera.

“Pinkie, we need ta bring those ponies to Zurvan Amp Station, not make ‘em vomit onta their keyboards…”

“Jackie, I thought the New Conglomareate were about freedom!”

“They’re ‘bout fighting ta keep it, and if we don’t fight, we can’t have it. So stop spinnin’ and let ‘em fight.”

“But Jackie…”

“Pinkie, take yer big plane and get to Zurvan. I’ll do what I can down on the ground ta make sure ya don’t get shot down on the way.”

“For FREEDOM AND CUPCAKES!”

“How ‘bout just ‘Fer Freedom’?”

Pinkie was already doing corkscrews upward and rose above the canyon’s walls, before leveling out and flying towards Zurvan. Applejack attempted to keep up below, but the Vanguard wasn’t meant to keep up with pink ponies playing perilously with planes.


“Aww yeah!” An orange Pegasus with a gray mane inspected her newly-purchased Mosquito. Fluttershy was in a Sunderer was parked nearby, equipped with an AMS. It was filling up quickly, the Equestrians all too eager to get into the battle in force. She had chosen to be a Healer, before realizing that she would be taking points away from the driver, instead switching to Mechanic as soon as she could in order to keep the troop transport alive. Rainbow had surprisingly not chosen Mechanic herself, deciding that a Pegasus’s wings would help her survive an ejection out of an injured aircraft and keep her combative if she survived. All around Prowlers and Lightnings readied their cannons while Liberators and Mosquitos tested their thrusters.

“Fluttershy, where is your driver headed? I’ll provide air support.”

Butterfly120: Um… excuse me, but where are we going?

TimeLord10: We’re driving to Hvar Tech Plant to capture it while the Luna are otherwise occupied. MUFN has been distracting them by capturing and holding onto the Luna Archives. We’ll deploy and swarm it before they know what hit them, and cut off their Magrider production.

“He says we’re going to Hvar Tech Plant.”

“I can read, Fluttershy. Let’s get this moving. For the Equestrian Republic!”

"F-for the Equestrian Republic..."

Author's Note:

I've been playing too much Planetside, so I decided to spend my spare time more productively. By writing about Planetside. All comments will be read and appreciated!