The Shadow Lord, a man who has mastered dark magic and leads the dark army that secretly controls the world, is the father of Shadow Elements. The Shadow Lord gave Shadow the ability to control the weather so that he could join his father in ruling the world. In order to get Shadow to abandon his life with his adoptive parents The Shadow Lord has them killed. Their deaths spark the raging inferno of Shadow's revenge which soon becomes his only goal. When Shadow is transported to Equestria he takes his terrible past with him. What will the ponies think of Shadow's goal? Darkness is coming to Equestria, and Shadow may not be able to stop it.
Chapters (4)
Pinkie Pie is best pony
This chapter... I like it. The only thing I'd say would be to make less 4th wall breaking comments (Magikarp, FSM etc.)
And be careful with a very powerful OC. As soon as anyone so much as even breathes the words 'Mary Sue' in a criticism, it's over. You just need some unfixed flaws for a good character.
I'd be happy to offer proofreading services for this story, if it's okay with you and your editor.
Keep up the work, I'd like to see this character progress.
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I understand what you're saying, I was trying to be funny with the fourth wall comments but I guess that kinda fell through. And Shadow may be powerful but he has some pretty serious psychological problems. He's kinda like Ciel from Black Butler but with the power needed to actually carry out his wishes. I'll have to talk to my lazy editor about the proofreading and such but I'll get back to you
Hey only constuctrive criticism on this. My friend worked very hard on this fic and comments like this fuckin suck wont do. So please remember no being a dick
THUS IS A FALSE ALARM THE NEW CHAPTER IS COMING IN A COUPLE OF YEARS
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You filthy peasant! I see through your lies!