Fleetfoot didn't know a pegasus alive that disliked this feeling. Cool air, whipped through her mane, tugging at it ever so slightly. Suddenly, a harsh tailwind vied to blow the mare off course, but her deft skills kept her course straight and true. She turned her head, searching for the source of the unexpected gale. To her surprise, a large cumulus shifted and grew before her eyes. In a matter of seconds, the harmless cloud had become a veritable maelstrom. From her altitude, she could see the wind whip through the trees of the Everfree, tossing the forest's canopy about like a great, green sea during a hurricane.
She only knew one pegasus capable of morphing a cloud in such a dramatic way, so quickly, and no natural phenomena could complete such a task, not even over the Everfree. A bright flash of lightning nearly blinded her, and the concussive force of its thunder knocked the wind from her lungs, causing the cyan mare to cough and sputter. When her vision recovered, Fleetfoot saw a great oak tree slowly crumble into a heap.
Carried by love and undying hope, she turned, flapping her wings quickly and heading towards the precipice of the storm.
That's where he would be.
***
The periwinkle mare let out a muffled giggle as she used her mouth to unlock the door of her sister's home. After putting the key away, the green-maned pony slowly pushed the door open, trying not to startle anypony.
"Hey, you two!" she called out, in a sing-song voice, as she walked casually around the living room. A few minutes pass as the visitor meandered around the room, looking at all the photos of her sister that line its walls.
"Hmm… Maybe they're out," the mare stated, after receiving no response. Wanting to make sure her trip was not wasted, Tenderheart moved deeper into the home, passing the dining room and heading towards the closed door of the bedroom. A low groan passes through the door just as she approaches it.
"Or, they’re just busy." A wry smile spread across the mare's face; it promptly faded when another set of low sounds reached her ear.
Was that crying?
"That bastard!"
No one takes advantage of my sister like that!
With a burst of adrenaline coursing through her veins, the blue mare reared, forcefully bucking the door. The cracking of splitting wood, a great bang, and a high-pitched scream issued forth. The door was left, barely, on its hinges and possibly embedded into the wall, but the angered and fearful pony didn't pay them any mind as she rushed into the room, her eyes ablaze.
Though, the sight before her was not what she expected. There was no stallion lording over her sister, possibly hurting her. Instead, there was a trembling ball of what seemed to be a pony buried in the linens of the bed. Her anger quickly passed, and she began to calm down.
"Honey, it’s Joy. Are you ok?" she asked quietly, trying not to cause any more harm than she already had. After a moment, the face of a certain white mare cautiously slid out from under the linens, and Tenderheart let out a quiet gasp when she saw her sister's state.
To say she looked completely miserable was an understatement. Her eyes were beet red and puffy, the short hairs on her face were matted with what looked like a mixture of tears and mucus, and her mane was going in every direction except for the one it normally did.
"Joy, what are you doing here? And why did you kick in my door?" The mare's voice was weak, and her unstable breathing, a result of her sobbing, caused her voice to hitch a few times mid-sentence.
"It's my day off, and I wanted to come over and see how happy my sister was," the blue mare replied, sounding quite crestfallen.
"Looks like I've ruined that," the dejected mare stated, her tears returning in full force as she continues, "Just like I've ruined that amazing stallion's life and my own." Once again, she buried her head into her pillow, and the room was, once again, filled with the sounds of her sobbing.
Tenderheart's mouth opened and closed time and again as she tried to speak, but every time her reeling mind failed to express her feelings. After a moment and a deep breath, she succeeded.
"Red, what's happened?" The blue mare slowly climbed onto the bed. Positioning herself beside her sobbing sister, Tenderheart began to comfortingly rub her back.
"I lied to him, and sent him away with hope that he finds his way back to his real marefriend," the crying mare spoke, through her pillow. Yet again, Tenderheart's mind was left reeling from the revelation, but to her credit, her hoof never stopped lovingly stroking her sister's back, trying to bring any comfort to the downtrodden mare.
"Real marefriend?"
"They had been together for twelve years!" Redheart revealed, beginning to sound angry. "And I stole him away from her!" Her body rises and falls as she sighs deeply, pushing the anger from her mind. "But, I pushed him back to her, and I did what I'm supposed to. I helped other ponies.
"Now, I just want my heart to be whole again. I want things to go back to how they were."
Tenderheart's hoof stopped its movement, instead reaching under her sister and lifting her into a sitting position on the bed. The two embraced tightly. They stayed like this for more than a few minutes with Redheart's crying never abating. Eventually, a few silent tears rolled down the blue mare's cheeks when her empathy began to show through.
"You poor, stupid mare," Tenderheart said, holding her sister tight and cradling the white mare's head in her hoof. "You'll be ok, Red. It just takes time."
***
Your eyes stare into the vastness before you as violent wind whips around you, coursing over your body like a great tide; the rumble of thunder is a near constant assault on your ears. All of the sorrow and anger has drained from your body, leaving you feeling hollowed and cold.
Soon, the many thoughts going through your mind boil down to one multifaceted question. Why?
Why wouldn't she listen to me?
Why did she have to be so cold?
Why doesn’t she love me?
Your mind travels back to your shared romance, not even two days ago, and you hear your own voice, as if carried on the wind. "I love you, and I never want to leave your side."
You momentarily close your eyes, and your breath is stolen away by the incredibly vivid memory of her lips pressing against yours, in a heated kiss. After a moment, you take in a slow, wavering breath, and somehow, the scent of lavender prevails on these stratospheric winds. You feel a few tears begin to drip from your eyes.
"I love you, too." You begin to sob again when the nurse's gentle voice is heard.
"Birdie," a familiar voice states, barely audible over the wind.
"Why did you have to kiss me, and why do I have feelings for you? I don't even know you!" you say, nearly yelling as another flash of anger spreads through your mind.
"I'm sorry." Nearly instantly, the anger is drained from your body.
Tears still flow from your eyes as you reply, "Now, I've lost you both, and I'm having a conversation with myself." With your eyes still closed, you slowly take a step forward. At the edge of your forehooves, you can feel the cloud drop away, into oblivion. Lifting a hoof, you begin to take another step, but just as you begin to lose your balance and fall, a rough tug at your tail pulls you back, away from the edge. You collapse onto your stomach, and your collision with the edge of the cloud knocks the wind out of you. The sharp pain forces your eyes to shoot open.
"STOP IT!" Echo's voice calls out, wavering. A cyan pair of hooves wraps around your neck and the mare's warm body presses up against yours.
"Wait, you're actually here?"
"Of course I am, Birdie," she speaks, softly.
"But why?"
"Because I knew you would be here, and because I've only ever seen you create a storm like this when you need me." She lets go of you and sits next to you, on her haunches. "What did you mean when you said that you lost us both?"
You pull yourself up into a sitting position matching hers and turn to look upon the mare. Her emerald eyes are tinged with red and her white mane is being blown about, just like yours. "I drove you away—"
"Birdie," she interrupts, "you didn't drive me away. I just couldn't stand to see you so conflicted without being able to help. And, you could never lose me." She places her hoof against your chest, and you can feel your heart jump from the contact. "But what about that other mare?" Your heart falls, and you hang your head, causing your face to brush past her foreleg. After a moment of silence, her hoof travels up your chest, pulling your head up to look at her.
In the end, it's her eyes that give you the strength to talk. "She told me that she didn't love me, and then threw me out." Saying it out loud and in such solid terms is oddly cathartic. It doesn't make your heart hurt any less, but you are able to stop crying.
She slowly leans in, wrapping her hooves around you in a soft hug. "I'm sorry, Birdie."
"It's not your fault," you say, with your head resting on her shoulder.
"Maybe not, but at one point I wanted this to happen. And now that it has, I see how terrible that was of me. No pony should have to feel like this, especially the one I love so much."
"I forgive you, Echo." You're not sure if it's because you've already hit rock bottom or because you really do forgive her but, you don't feel any worse after her revelation. The cyan pegasus wraps a forehoof around you, cradling your head.
"You'll be ok, Birdie"
"No, Echo. We'll be ok." For a time, the only sounds are that of your shared breathing.
"Do you really mean that?" she asks, sounding quite skeptical.
Breaking your hug, you speak, "don't get me wrong. We can't go on like nothing happened, but the way I see it, you lost something in that accident too. You lost me, and I want to give you a chance to get that back. I want to give us a chance, but I need time to get my head on straight. It feels wrong to be so forward, so soon after... That happened."
"Ok, Birdie. I understand." You see a glimmer of hope in her eyes, and it buoys your spirit a little. Though, you're not sure why.
"I do have to admit, that I need your help, though, Echo. I don't have any bits or anything to my name."
"But you do have those things, and just because you don't remember them, doesn't mean that they're not yours. Being a Wonderbolt means you have a ton of bits. You've got parents that love you and that will be glad to know you're ok, even as you are." The cyan mare ever so slightly inches closer to you. "We've got a house in Cloudsdale. And you've got a filly that will always love you." She punctuates her sentence by darting in and placing a quick, soft kiss on your lips.
When she pulls away, you're left with a small smile and a bright blush on your face. In your heart, warmth fights against the cold pain of your loss, leaving you feeling conflicted, once more. However, seeing the mare's soft smile seems to maintain your own.
"Speaking of all of those things, do you think we could go home? I don't really want to stay here anymore."
"Yeah, we can, Birdie. We do need to tell Spitfire what happened, though. She'll be really angry if we disappear more than we already have."
***
Redheart made her way out of her home, passing into the warmth of the day. She cast a backward glance at her sister as the blue mare passed through the doorway. Tenderheart gave a reassuring nod before sidling up to her sister. Slowly, they made their way into town, passing ponies that happily smiled and waved as the well-known care givers passed by.
Not long before they pass into the town square, a cream-colored mare approached the duo with her saddle bags full of flowers.
"Hey you," the mare chimed, her two-toned pink mane bobbing as she trots.
Redheart simply smiled in response, but her sister offered a friendly greeting, "Hi, Roseluck."
"I don't want to hold you up, but I did want to stop and thank you both for helping me feel better after my little run in with that foxglove."
"Oh, it was nothing, dear. Though, you should be more careful about which of your flowers you eat."
"I know, but the blue ones are always so tasty, and—" The nurses' combined glare caused the flower pony to stop mid-sentence and look away, nervously. "I'll be more careful next time." With a forehoof, Rose reached into her saddlebags, still speaking, "I really stopped you because I wanted to give you these." Two bouquets are extracted from her saddle bag and given to the sisters. Each is made up of a different assortment of flowers, and is wrapped in a thin white paper.
"That one," the flower sister stated, pointing to the bouquet held by Tenderheart, "has a yellow rose, yellow poppies, a peony, and some mignonette. Redheart, yours has red and yellow roses, snowdrop, and star of Bethlehem-n-haw."
"Thanks, Rose."
"Thank you, Roseluck," the duo replied, nearly in unison.
"You're welcome, and take care." The three ponies all said their goodbyes before Roseluck made her way back to her flower stand.
The remaining two ponies, once again, began their aimless walk. They happily chatted as they walked, as sisters are prone to do. Soon, they passed by the Clinic and both mares let out a relieved sigh when they saw that it hadn't burned down or exploded in their absence. A distant, yet powerful rumble of thunder temporarily drew their attention towards the Everfree; a massive thunderhead could be seen over its reaches.
"Ooo, that looks nasty." Tenderheart's eyes scanned the sky for other signs of an oncoming storm.
"Yeah, it does. Maybe we could get something to eat and see if it's going to come this way or not," Redheart offered, motioning to the nearby bakery, Sugarcube Corner.
"That sounds good to me, Red." They turned from their original course, pushed the bakery door open, and stepped into the familiar setting.
There were quite a few other ponies inside, and as such, the room was filled with the low murmur of their idle chatter. Upon glancing around, the sisters found that all of the tables inside were occupied, causing Redheart to let out an irritated groan.
"Oh, there's Bon Bon. Maybe she would let us join her," her sister said, beginning to walk towards a table across the room. Redheart reluctantly followed close behind. As they got closer, the white-coated sister saw that Bon Bon was sharing her table with another earth-pony mare. Her coat was a light tan, and she wore a lavender headband accompanied with a white lotus blossom in her chocolate-brown mane.
Both Bon Bon and the mystery mare turned their attention to the sisters as Tenderheart spoke, "Hi, Bon Bon. We were wondering if you would mind if we joined you. All of the other tables are taken."
"Please, do," the candy mare stated. "Sweets, this is Nurse Tenderheart and Nurse Redheart. They run the Clinic just down the street. Nurses, this is my long-time friend, Sweets." The sisters each took a seat at the round table, sitting across from each other. Sweets offered a simple greeting before her friend continued, "And where is that st—"
Bon Bon's sentence was cut short by the surreptitious, but furiously shaking head of Nurse Tenderheart.
"—stupid waiter."
"Here I am, you silly filly," said a previously absent Pinkie Pie, sitting in a fifth chair, directly across from Bon Bon. A surprised silence overtook the group just before they all broke into contagious laughter. When the laughter died down, Pinkie looked to her two new patrons, pulling a notepad and quill out of Celestia knows where. "So, what'll it be?"
After they both placed their orders, the pink mare bounced out of her chair and onto the table, causing the plates, glasses, and silverware to rattle. Next, the pink menace bounced completely over Bon Bon's head, landing on the floor behind her and trotting away happily. A few moments later, Pinkie delivered two croissants, a cup of coffee, an orange cupcake, and a cup of Lady Neigh tea.
Nurse Redheart clutched her glass between her hooves and took a long, shaky breath, hovering her face over the dark liquid. For a while, she stared at her reflection, and it stared back, looking forlorn. The conversation taking place between the three other mares continued without her, but before long, her reverie was broken by a hindhoof, gently placed against her own. Looking across the table, her sister was casting her an encouraging glance, and at an opportune moment, Redheart joined in the conversation.
After what seemed like only a few minutes, Bon Bon and Sweets excused themselves and left, having to reopen their own shop. The time had absolutely flown by, and Redheart was sad to see them go, but she was absolutely ecstatic that their meeting had left her feeling normal and happy again, if only temporarily.
“Thank you for making me do this, Joy.”
“You’re welcome, Red,” Tenderheart said, rising from her seat and moving to one next to her sister. “I wanted to remind you that life goes on, and that you can still be happy, even after something that seems so damning.”
Redheart wistfully glanced at her untouched meal, pausing briefly before speaking, “Do you think we could go to the spa next? I send ponies there so often, but I never get to go myself.
“I think that’s a great idea!” the green mare said. Climbining from her seat, once again, she held out a helping hoof to her sister.
After a moment, Redheart took her sister’s hoof, breaking her eyes away from the plate in front of her and looking up to her smiling sister. They share a quick hug before moving towards the exit, where Tenderheart held the door open for her sister. The blinding light of Celestia’s sun poured in through the doorway, silhouetting each mare as they pass through. The wooden door slowly swung closed behind the mares, leaving the vision of anypony watching bathed in an inky blackness.
***
Thankfully, Spitfire had been more than accommodating when your situation was explained. Truly, she had been very concerned when she learned that you had been nearly killed, and she was curious about what happened afterwards. You had been quite thoroughly vague during that section of your story.
But that was all over with, now, and you are on your way to Cloudsdale, following behind Fleetfoot at a leisurely pace. The cyan mare leads you on, at an increasingly higher altitude; great plains and forests pass below you, and with every flap of your wings, the shrinking expanse of Ponyville gets farther and farther behind. Rotating your head, you glance backward, and you can feel a scowl form on your face as you watch the town mill disappear over the horizon.
The sudden contact of a soft surface brushing against the tip of your wing breaks your glare, and causes you to whip your head around to face it. Fleetfoot has slowed and is now flying along beside you; her wings flap in the exact opposite pattern as yours, causing your primaries to brush past each other with every motion. The sensitive nature of your wings makes it very hard to stop yourself from laughing as the soft appendages touch. Even though the mare is still looking ahead, you can see a mischievous smile on her face.
After a few more beats of your wing, you succumb and begin to snicker. The quick convulsions of your body, resulting from your laughter, disrupt your flight, causing you to begin to lose altitude. As a reaction, your wings shoot out to full length, and you begin to glide as your mirth subsides. All of a sudden, a soft, yet forceful object lands on your back, sending your course into a steepening descent.
A pair of cyan hooves hug your neck tightly as you blurt out a surprised, "Hey!" But before anything could be done, you collide with the spongy surface of a stray cloud and are sent tumbling head over hooves. In the process, the playful mare is thrown from your back; even so, you can hear her laughter as you slowly come to a stop. This situation really does make you appreciate clouds. They're so soft that they can even make crashing feel good.
Slowly, You roll over onto your back, giving your head a chance to stop spinning. Fleetfoot's laugh once again meets your ears as she straddles your body, laying on top of you and pinning you down. She's still widely smiling when your eyes lock, and a sudden stillness overtakes your mind. You can feel her chest move against yours with her excited breathing. After a moment longer, she gently places a hoof to your cheek, slowly leaning in.
"Echo," you say, as the turmoil in your mind returns. But your speech is too little, too late, and her lips connect with yours. The kiss is gentle and slow, and as her breath rushes over your fur, it feels cool, like a gentle spring breeze. She breaks away, nuzzling your face, opposite her hoof, before pulling away and looking into your eyes once more.
"Echo." This time, you speak more firmly. "I told you, I need time to get my head on straight." Her smile fades a little, and she grasps your face between both forehooves. Cocking her head inquisitively to the side, she turns your head to all sorts of awkward angles before returning it to face her.
"It looks like it's ok to me. I think if it were on backwards, or something, you'd have a much better view of your own flank. Though, you probably wouldn’t enjoy the view as much as I do," she jokes lightly, through a wan smile. But after a moment under your unflinching gaze, the mare's façade shatters, leaving her broken and weak looking.
"Birdie, please." She sounds like she is one small step away from crying, and you can feel her body lightly tremble against yours, sending your heart crashing into your stomach. "Ever since I learned you were still alive, I just wanted to be able to hold you and tell you how happy I am that you're ok. I've tried to be strong and not force your hoof, but it's so hard."
"I just want things to go back to normal. We were so happy." She nestles against you tightly, resting her head against your shoulder. You twist your head and turn your softened gaze upon her. Reacting to your movement, she affectionately nuzzles your neck. Without knowing it, a smile begins to tug at your lips.
After a moment of tranquil silence, you bring a hoof up and run it over her multi-hued mane; it's frizzy, wind-whipped nature makes it feel incredibly soft against your hoof. Fleetfoot glances up at you with a look of genuine surprise on her face, as if running your hoof through her mane was the last thing that she had expected would happen. When she sees your expression, she smiles, and that sight seems to melt the ice in your heart, sending a feeling of serenity through your being.
You use your hoof to gently pull her face towards you, planting a light kiss on her cheek; there is no fire or lightning coursing through your body from the act, not yet at least. For now, it just feels good, in that indescribable way that kissing a mare does. When your lips part from her soft flesh, you watch her emerald eyes go wide in surprise, once again.
"Birdie?" Somehow, her voice perfectly conveys a multitude of emotions in just one word, and you know exactly what she’s asking.
“I don’t think I even know what normal is, but I know that I felt terrible every time I saw you cry. I know that seeing you smile made me forget about what just happened, back there, and if that is what normal is, I want that too.” As you spoke, the mare’s expression slowly changed to a uneasy smile. Internally, you hope that your smile hides your nervousness better than hers.
“I really want to kiss you right now, Birdie, but I don’t mmnff—” Her sentence breaks into a muffled mumbling before it is completely cut off as you press your lips tenderly against hers. The kiss doesn’t last long, but when you pull away, the mare’s emerald eyes are shining brightly.
“I thought you’d never do that again.” A single joyous tear rolls down from each of her eyes and soaks into the fur at the base of your neck. Burying her hooves into the cloud below you, Fleetfoot wraps you in a tight hug. “I’ve missed you so much.” Regardless of your memories – or lack thereof – the amount of sincere emotion that this mare is showing you makes you feel so many wonderful sensations. You don’t think that love is one of them, but if this keeps up, you’re sure it will be.
The two of you stay like that for a while, simply enjoying the sensations of holding – or being held by – another pony. Soon, the warmth of the mare on top of you and your lack of sleep surreptitiously begin to tug at your eyelids, sending you into a peaceful rest.
***
Sometime later, you’re awoken by the mare on top of you shifting. A long yawn escapes your mouth, and you pry your watering eyes open. Through the blur, the first thing you see is a set of emerald eyes looking back at you, no doubt watching you sleep. A cyan hoof gently pokes your nose.
“Boop,” Fleetfoot says through a small smile.
You lean forward and peck her on the nose, softly uttering, “boop.” You yawn once more.
“Did you sleep well?”
“Mmhm. I had a wonderful dream about you, too.”
“You sure looked happy.”
You lean in and nuzzle her. “I was,” you say, quietly. Fleetfoot returns your nuzzle affectionately.
“I wish we could stay like this forever,” she says, sounding disappointed, “But I’m really hungry, and It would be really bad for me to avoid eating.” As she speaks, she climbs off of you, rising to her hooves and stretching her stiff leg muscles.
Slowly, you do the same, flapping your wings a few times to get the kinks, caused by laying on them for such a long time, out.
“What did you mean ‘really bad for you to avoid eating’?”
“Oh,” she says, placing a hoof on her belly, and rubbing it gently. “Nothing, really. Just that I’m really hungry.”
Even though it seems a bit strange, you take her for her word and just chalk it up to your, still sleepy, mind making something out of nothing. Now that your extremities are awake again, you move up next to Fleetfoot and unfurl your wings, signaling that you’re ready to go.
“That’s Cloudsdale over there.” She motions a hoof to what looks to be a large cloud bank, far off in the distance.
“That’s home.”
After two weeks of working 6 days a week, and a run in with a freind's stalker ex-boyfriend here's the next portion of he alt ending. :)
Really hope it's enjoyable. Updates on this will alternate with my other story. So it may be a bit before more comes out, again.
-M@
Moar
God forbid this to ever leave both my favorites and the featured box
Yeah, now Redheart feel more right.
-Glassed
797876oh for gods sake!
the same thing happened to me like a 3 months ago
my friend found out she had a bit of a stalker ...well, stalking her
and it was just wierd
25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m1q9d3uhU31qisw73o1_500.jpg
My face after seeing the first chapter
i1.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/002/796/447px-Manlytears3.jpg
My face after this chapter and the whole story
Alt ending is best ending
797876
Stalker? D:
798067
Completely agree with you on that, in least the Redheart is official ending, this is alt.
But if I was Birdy, I would have most difficult choice. All three choice would have one of them hurt or both.
(Stay with Redheart)
(Go back with Fleet)
(or not either)
798512 Well, I meant in regards to the last chapter (Alt ending part 1). I thought Redheart came across as a total bitch; completely disregarding her character from the rest of the story. Now we actually get a reason for her behavior.
-Glassed
798539
I figure that Birdy will learn the truth behind her lying behavior in some point in the future.
798544 Perhaps. Unless he completely avoids her (and vice versa), which wouldn't come as a big surprise at the moment.
Seems like he just want to have his old life back right now.
-Glassed
This new alternate ending just feels much more right. It's the cause of this fiction entering my top 3 of all time fictions. Nice job man, really nice.
So much happiness.
798539 Now that I've confirmed that this was Red's intention all along, I can say that I was surprised by how well people have segregated the two endings. In 'Genuine' she revealed that she had thought about doing this very thing, but with a bit of quick action (basically by reminding her why she loves you.), you were able to derail that train before it left the station. But, In 'Butterfly Effect', for whatever reason, you hesitated, and that let her build up the will power to go through with it. And being a nurse, she knew that sometimes the cure for a disease can be more painful than the disease itself. So, she was able to use her years of experience nursing, and having to hide her own emotions in difficult situations (showing a conscious patient their life is in danger by showing fear, etc just hastens their demise (Hence one of my favorite scenes. The one just after the shower scene, where she carries you, and tries to keep you from looking at the large pool of blood. (Also ended up making the best paramedic pony name ever here, Gurney. hehe))) *yay, parenthesis* , to go through with it.
That all makes sense, right? It's not just a jumble of my convoluted thoughts is it? Oh well, too busy shoving Chinese food down my gullet to proof it.
798806 I think it works perfectly. With this, you gave her a reason and not just had her be a total bitch/OOC.
-Glassed
Huh, I always like off shipping pares (non-mane 6, they get enough screen time as it is) but can't deal with the second person PoV. Anyway best of luck to you.
I definetaly loved this ending more!
will there be moar to this alt ending
799732 Indeed there will. Just might be a little while, since my next update will be to my other story.
752253 Crap, I can't believe I forgot to reply to you. This was exactly what I was looking for, and I really appreciate the time you put into this reply. I'm truly sorry that I let you hang this long, life has been frantic, and I, sort of, got tunnel vision on my writing in my spare time.
Thanks again,
-M@
It pains me so much to read Nurse Redheart's situation. In any case take pride in the fact you are the third author to make me shed tears after nearly 7 million words read on this site.
Now make redheart happy again!
...............*sniff* don't cry. don't cry don't cr- FUCK!
Ok i would like to contradict my feelings in this comment compared to my last comment. The more i read the angrier i got. I set in the most unconfurtabale (cant spell and dont really giva a fuck) chair in the damn house and set pandora to play throught tyler,the creater and five finger death punch and it made me feel like...stabbing someone. Would i really just go out and stab someone? No. Not a chance but i felt like i could if that makes since. OH almost forgot fuck you fore giving readheart the main ending! But i really like this alt. ending it makes this worth pressing that favorite. But i am king of glad that this is the alt. ending because i just wouldnt read it if this was about readheart. Oh and congrats on being the only person ever to make me want to kill a pony from friendship is magic! And i switched it back to a like after reading this...well not yet but when i am done here i will i promise. And when i started reading the alt. ending i switched the music and went to the couch. (i read on my iphone) and i know i have acted like a prick but thats just my way and get used to it because i actually like your work and plan to pack at you and scream on all your other storys and i mean that in the nicest way possible. And one more thing have you ever thought about making a story that focusess on the twelve years they were together? Because i would read that and i would just think of my own things that happened but my imagination on happy things is shit. Done now
With love,
Happy at moment (usually pissed off) commenter!
817714 this is the best thing I've ever read. Nothing makes an author more happy than getting an emotional response from a reader, it's why we write.
And I'm glad to know that I'm not the only one who throws the dislike button around for stories that take a turn in a direction that angers me. Hell, I nearly threw my tablet across the room when reading the ending to 'The Games We Play'
You relly dont know how happy that makes me and heres why: you read your comments at all. you would be shocked at the amount of people that just dont read there comments also you take time to reply Which means a lot and you also appreciate what your readers have to say or at least i think. And i just changed it back to a like this reminded me. Well thanks and i will be watching. Uhh i hate saying that i feel like a fucking stalker.
I came back to congratulate you unless its not the first time. So CONGRATS! When i woke up this morning my eyes were watering and i was covered in sweat i know it was about your story but i don't remember much all i can remember is the word "birdy?" i know it sounds like a lie but its true. Everytime birdy was said in the story i got so sad. Oh and if you don't mind me asking did you mean for it to be so sad?
I like the original ending more than this ending, mostly because Redheart is my third favorite pony (after the mane six and luna that is)
Moar please.
824540 sorry for bein tardy to this party. I did not originally intend for this to be a sad story at all. I can't even begin to describe how much I dislike sad stories in the mlp universe. It just seems to contradict everything that the world is.
But when one inadvertently gets themselves into a situation like this, things just can't be completely happy (even mostly happy is stretching it).
Fleetfoot was supposed to be a character to feel bad for. So much so that I ended up writing this alternate ending because I felt terrible for the filly. The scene where Fleetfoot first sees to again was such a emotionally complex, yet beautiful scene, and also, it was the introduction of the nickname Birdie. As such, Im not surprised that that feeling could become ingrained into it for the reader. Though, to Fleetfoot there is something else very important to her behind that nickname.
I hope I've been detailed enough her to make up for my uncouth delay.
-M@
857942
Ya no ofince (i dont know if theres a spelling section on 'are you smarter then a 5th graded' but if there is it would cause me to loose) but some of the chapters i want to pretend never happened. I know that you like readheard (i think) but after reading this i cant stab her oh i am sorry i mean stand after this story when i think about her stab just comes to mind. (its not that bad i am just fucking around but i really do hate her after this story) and on the alternate ending all the scenes that go back to readheart i just skip them i dont care at all about her in this storry any more. I feel like throughout the story she went from caring to pregnent pony slaping bitch thats really thoughtless and selfiss and this is my felling this long after reading all the chapters you have released. Finally i have been wanting to ask something. Are you planning on making this end happy? Well doesnt have to end happy for readheart i dont give a fuck how it ends for her. Oh one more thing. I was going to say this when i thought of it but you hadnt replied to my comment from earlier so i took it as a que to shut the fuck up. So i guess i am sorry for jumping to conclusions or some shit like that. Looking forward to reading more!
859157 Happy? Wazat?
Seriously, yes. The end is nigh, and is intended to be happy. You'll be happy to know (others might not), that Redheart's story in this ending has finished. She's realized that things are going to get better, but that is for another story. Now, Back to writing (after a 10hr work day).
868531
Thank you for the information.
There is so much emotional depth to this story...
I'll post a proper comment when I am not on an iPod.
Okay, so I was planning a nice long comment, but I'm short on time.
Anyway: This story seems to carry a lot of emotional depth with it - although some of the dialogue seems clunky, such as Nighthawk never really hesitating before saying something significant or romantic. (Which is what I would expect)
I can't really decide if I like the official or the non-canon ending more, (Canon in a FIMFiction. Hah) but either way the finale's to this story leave me feeling sad for whichever mare 'lost'. It's a good thing I had the BIG sequel to make me laugh afterwards.
I eagerly await the final chapter.
>> Agarwaen
I really liked this story. It got me quite emotional. However, in the Alt Ending it's nice FleetFoot isn't rejected, but I don't like how Redheart is gone, as she's one of my favourite characters.
In the regular ending, I really really liked that one because it's quite funny, and redheart is awesome. It's also not cool how Fleet is gone.
If I wrote the story(what I'd do), I'd plan it out so that NightHawk maintains relationships with both Red and Fleet. Fleet could go to the ponyville clinic to take care of her foal, yes?
That way, Fleet nor Red gets left behind. They're two awesome characters, and I don't like having one win one lose, but hell, that's life.
If only NightHawk could marry one and maintain a great friendship with the other. That'd be perfect for me.
Sorry for my weird typing, it's 0500 and I haven't slept... been reading all your fimfics
I am sleep deprived.
By the way, you gotta become published. ^.^ I'd support, but don't forget illustrations! :D
881560
What BIG sequel?
895827 it's been said and is quite true, that the worst pain in the world is loving someone who doesn't love you back. And to be around someone who has all of the qualities that you look for in a mate would just make it worse as time went on. The only way to stop the pain is to move on and find love somewhere else. In Echo's case, that is/was going to be in her foal.
Haven't read, but will come back to this. Looks interesting as buck.
923653 heheh...... Dance my emotional puppet... Dance! *maniacal laugh*
Heheh. Glad that yo seem to be entertained, though. Since that is the purpose of this, it means I've at least partially done what i set out to.
Great story, i can't feel my heart anymore...
It hurts... but it was a beautiful story.
Is The Games We Play a good read? I will comment for real on the last chapter, I'm just not done yet.