• Published 31st Aug 2013
  • 1,468 Views, 39 Comments

Sword Art Equestria - Navy Shadow



The new NerveGear game Sword Art Online has just come out. only 10000 copies are available and Kirito has one. This is the game that will change everyone's life. but is it for the better?

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Chapter 1 - New Beginnings

Chapter 1 - New Beginnings

A flash, and Kirito was back in the game world, Aincrad. A floating castle above the clouds, taller than the tallest skyscraper in New York and he was on the bottom floor. The castle didn’t really stick to normal world rules. Each floor of the castle was floating around 100 foot above the last floor, the only way to the next floor was through a dungeon with a boss at the end. Killing the boss unlocks the next floor. If you were to be living in a town inside Aincrad, you'd think it was just a normal city in a normal world. because everything looks normal. You look up and see blue skies and clouds, and below your feet is soft green grass, everything just felt right.

Kirito looked around him. surrounding him were 9999 other players. Everyone had been dumped back into the plaza, where they were when Kayaba showed himself and revealed his true intentions for this game. Remembering his personal wish to Kayaba he opened his map from his menu. There he found a new city, situated a few miles away from his current location; The Town of Beginnings. Ponyville, It was here. Cities, towns and villages from all over Equestria had been scattered around Aincrad’s many floors. Kirito took off instantly. Not even bothering to wait for his friend, he'd be fine on his own, besides, his friend had people who were coming to game with him anyway. Kirito found the exit to the town of beginnings and set off running down the new path to Ponyville.


Around halfway down the path, Kirito caught a glimpse of something in the corner of his eye, it was flying, and looked sort of like a large bird. Bigger than he’d ever seen. He slowed to a stop and looked around to see what it was. He looked around for a while longer before seeing a rainbow streak fly up from a tree in the distance. With a smile he started waving at the thing causing the streak of rainbow colours, calling it down to talk to him.

The flying animal seemed to have seen him as it stopped in mid air and then started to slowly head towards him. As it got closer he saw the creature had 4 hooves, a rainbow coloured tail and mane, a blue coat and more importantly it had wings, it was a horse with wings, It was a pegasus.

Kirito suddenly remembered where he was running to, and made mental note to get someone to slap him later.

The rainbow haired pegasus steadily approached the now facepalming human.
“Hello?” She called out apprehensively. “Do you speak my language?”

Kirito looked up at the floating pony.
“Hi. I’m Kirito. And you?”
"Rainbow Dash, and that wasn't a direct answer to my question. I'll take it anyway. Do you know where I am? I was just resting on a cloud over Ponyville when all of a sudden there was a flash of light and it seems to have moved to somewhere completely different."

‘Is it possible that Kayaba gave them complete memories?’
“Um well you see, I’m not actually real… Well I am, in a sense but this body of me isn’t real. Well actually it is now.”
“Get on with it” Rainbow Dash was getting impaitent.
“Well i could tell you the short version which explains nothing or i can give you the long version which will take around 10 minutes.”
“Well… Ponyville is a 10 minute walk from here, I think. I can’t tell with these new surroundings, but you can tell me as we’re walking if you want. If that’s where you were headed in the first place?”
“That sounds like a plan. And yes I was heading there actually.”

Rainbow Dash landed and began to walk towards the town of Ponyville.
“You comin or are you just gonna stand there staring at my flank?” Rainbow smiled back at him
“Coming…”

They both started to walk the path as Kirito started to explain everything. From the virtual world they were in to the NerveGear device every player was plugged into. He left out the details of what happens when the virtual bodies die, or what will happen when the game is either completed or all 10000 players die and the world is deleted and the game shut down as he didn’t want to think about that right at that moment, as he was with Rainbow Dash and it was a happy time for him.

More or less 10 minutes later, Rainbow Dash and Kirito arrived in Ponyville. As they entered a few ponies stared at Kirito as if he was some strange animal.
“Um, Rainbow Dash… Just a question that’s been on my mind. Why is it that everybody else around here is looking at me like i’m a wild animal but you had no problems approaching me earlier?”
“Well, to tell you the truth, I'm still a little wary of you, as you stand on 2 legs and you're carrying a sword.” Rainbow admitted. "But you seem nice, and you haven't shown any signs of hostility towards me or anypony else, so I'm willing to give you a shot." She said. Truthfully she added, "It also helps that we seem to use the same language." She looked around the town "Some of the other ponies might take some convincing, though. Do you want me to give you a tour while we're here? It might help get you acquainted"
“Why not…”

Rainbow walked Kirito around Ponyville, showing him all the landmarks such as Sugarcube Corner, the edge of the Everfree Forest, the Library, the Farm and the Boutique. Kirito was amazed at everything in this seemingly small town. As they walked back to the Library. Rainbow asked kirito if he enjoyed the tour. Kirito responded with a small nod as he was still looking around, amazed that he was actually here, inside Ponyville.

Suddenly a door slam broke him out of his amazement as a purple mare ran out towards Kirito and Rainbow Dash

“Rainbow! Something has moved Ponyville from Equestria! And most likely every other town, city and village too!”

“And this, Kirito… is Twilight Sparkle.”

Comments ( 36 )

This is good..... very good.....

Hmm... I'm not sure if I like this or not, because in my opinion SAO is too great to be messed with. Still, I'll give ya the benefit of the doubt, because this is a mix of my two favorite shows...
I hope you can make this story as awesome as I'm hoping it'll be. :pinkiesmile: :twilightsmile:

3131376

Thanks, unfortunately 5 others seem to think otherwise

3131794 Took the words right out of my mouth... This... should be interesting, to say the least. :applejackunsure:

3131794 3132616

Thank you for being interested :) I should have the next part up today or tomorrow

3132658 Nah, I'm always game when there's ponies involved. Too bad about your negative response so far, though. My fanfic started off slow, but now I'm actually getting "some" readers (only a hundred, but still more than I expected).

3132751

yeah i see no reason for all the dislikes really. My grammar isn't the best and i have already noticed a few mistakes of my own :/ i guess it's just something they don't like

While not perfetct, this is starting to get interesting so I'm willing to give this story a shot.

I really like the idea, and the execution wasn't too bad, but the whole "dream catcher" thing, in my opinion, doesnt seem to fit, I was expecting like a wierd glitch thing to merge SAO and mlp, not kayaba himself, it's kinda Ooc. I'd recommend reading the light novels in addition to watching SAO, do a bit more research, and tweak some things. Just keep working on it. I will put this on my read later list.

3136796

the way i write stories... i don't plan, i just start writing and put down what comes into my head at that time. yeah yours could have been a better idea and i may have thought of it myself if i actually planned but whatever

I don't know where i was going with this comment but thanks for the feedback anyway :)

I'm gonna say it, Kirito is definitely Ooc, but I will be continuing to read this. It's not bad, but you need an editor, not gonna lie.

3139079

Yeahhh i know. kirito is a little OOC, been a while since i've watched SAO. sorry, i'll try and fix it

3138446 i'll assume this is positive and say "yay":yay:

Well looks like you've been hit by the dreaded "douche voter" syndrome. I see you have more dislikes than likes, but the comments say otherwise.

I'll give this story a read and see whether or not it deserves the rating.:trixieshiftright:

Okay, I've read just the first chapter. You have some pretty bad grammar/spelling/punctuation mistakes throughout the chapter. Some things I noticed were mostly things like lone I's that you didn't capitalize, or additional punctuation marks where they didn't belong.

You have a good concept, but your presentation was lacking. Honestly, you don't deserve the rating you got. You just need to clean up your chapters. I'd volunteer to be your editor if you want.:trixieshiftleft:

3150074

Thanks for the feedback. Yeah i deserve the rating honestly. my grammar and presentation is absolutely horrendous but i'm working on it, slowly.

As for being my editor, Thanks but i already have a few friends who have volunteered :)

3150241Well, my offer still stands if you ever change your mind. Seeya~

The premise of this Fic is amazing. I honestly haven't seen a crossover of this nature anywhere.

...but after reading both chapters, I felt I had to downvote it.

The formatting was terrible, the flow was off, basic mistakes were everywhere, and anything not directly stated in the anime went completely against the flow of the story.

I hate to be a dick, but the quality of this Fic doesn't do either of the shows it's crossing over any justice.

3139558 i demand MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

WE WANT MORE:flutterrage:if thats ok with you:fluttershysad:

OK, I'll give story a chance. While the concept is ingenious for making a crossover of these two elements, you need to analyze the character's personalities to see if you are expressing the same personality as in their shows/manga. The flow was acceptable, but has room for improvement, I normally try to express how a character is feeling at that moment as well as adding scenic description to describe the surroundings, not just saying what they are.

But you need to take into account how you are going to implement this added concept to the original story line without affecting it too much. Maybe for each episode of the anime, you make it into a two to three part chapter, with half of it worth some pony interaction.

What I see here is that you are only telling us what was shown on the anime, but not trying to develop it unless you want to add some element that didn't happen originally. And a warning about fabrics that try to merge a new element into the story line of another, do not change the outcomes for different events too greatly or at all. Only exceptionbeing if the outcome doesn't affect the outcome or the desired message is not being alter, like Kirito's moment when he had to face the death of close teammates as guilt ate at him.

Asuna and Silica are going to LOVE it here.

Wow it has been a while since you made an update.

This story isn't that bad. That said, I think kirito feels a little ooc and I think the way Equestria got into SAO is a little weird. (Not saying impossible because kayaba did show is he wasn't evil at the end of his world.before the fairy game.) I think that you could improve your grammar a bit though. Not down voting or liking yet, but I'm going to keep my eye on this.

Must....Have more......To read! Why for no updates in a while? this is awesome!

4845522 seeing as how 3/5 of his fics were canceled, i dont have very high hopes for this one:ajbemused:

4881744

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

4882139 I know that feel bro. I've been waiting for Gyvon to update his Halo: on the Wings of Angels for two years now. Unlike this author, Gyvon is rather successful, but apparently stopped giving a fuck about his readers two years ago :pinkiesad:

4882450

Damn. So I guess I'll have awesome, albiet dead, fics sitting in my favroites.

4845522
4881744

I'm sorry :'( fanfic writing just kinda escaped me and i don't feel like i could make a comeback and hype up a new story/chapter without it being awful.

thank you for supporting me though and i'll see what i can do :) i still have a few ideas floating around so you never know. i might continue with this :3

This is AWESOME :rainbowdetermined2:
I totally love you for this so please continue!

5681939 pleeeeease continue!!

5681939 Want someone to help? I have resently watched SAO one and i'm pretty sure this is going to follow a similar story line am I right?

your name is marina like the new character from equestria girl named condrea marina have you heard of the movie sword art online condrea marina the girl from the high school stefan luchian botosani Romania still yes please answer me

Condrea marina

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