• Member Since 28th Nov, 2012
  • offline last seen Dec 1st, 2012

Trollknee


I troll others knees. Not really.

E

Applejack goes out and looks for a nice restaurant to eat at, The American Chinese Restaurant is her first pick and her only. She is hungry for anything so she doesn't mind its shaggy appearance, little did she know of what kind of food they served, and how awful it was.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 22 )

Well. That happened. :applejackunsure:

The best Chinese food I've ever eaten was made by Mexicans in a strip mall in San Bernardino. The worst Chinese I've ever had was still better than this.

I mean, I understand if you want to write crack, but even trollfics have quality standards.

Thanks for the positive feedback. Hope to produce another groundbreaking fic soon. :trollestia:

If someone would like to read over my trollfics, send me a message. I would love an editor. :rainbowdetermined2:

What the...

Ok... for starters... I'm asian and I don't talk like that... it's more of those who don't really learn english much...

And of course, because it's AMERICAN CHINESE... the food would DEFINITELY, 100% suck. You want the real thing? Come to an asian country. But I doubt you would.

Anyways, trollfic is trollfic so... *shrug*

It wasn't meant to be a trollfic until they labeled it so... As I said, if anyone wants to be my editor feel free to message me about it.

TL;DR

AJ ate some nasty chicken, threw up, it came to life, then died.

:ajbemused:
I have to write my reply as if Apple Jack her self wanted to comment.

Sugar Cube, why in tarnation would a pony eat chicken? We're plant eatters, what did Twilight call it now .... herbivores.
Sure we ponies eat eggs and dairy, some pegasus will eat fish for extra protein, shoot even Fluttershy catch fish to feed some of her critters.
But in the name of Celestia why would I, a pony order chicken, on top of that as a farmer I know when vegetables get old and saggy you send the dish back.
And Mold? What kind foal ya take me for accepting mold old saggy food with undercooked meat or any meat for that manner.
And honestly I wouldn't pay for the food if it was that terrible.

Also " Applejack couldn’t help but become irritated with the Asians, there speech replacing R with L frequently".
That is not me at all, I would never fault a pony or um person who speaks with an accent, and I have some understanding for folk who does not speak English (or as we ponies call it Equestrian) as their first language.

And about you bronies, okay some ya are sickos with yer rule 34 and Cupcakes, that story gave poor Dash nightmares for a week.
But I will admit some of ya bronies out there aren't all bad, some are rather polite and decent folk who are secure about them selves to admitting what they like even if that show is for fillies I mean girls.

Don't ever order the gagh.

Ok what do we got here. Applejack eat chicken its bad but also equestria was teleported to another dimension where there is brony. Again you use the stupid old description that hater use to describe the brony that come and ask applejack for an autograph. Thats not the end because this wasn't even funny intriging, funny or anything like that it was just plain boring. Half of the time you cant tell what happend. Well now my fellow brony will take my place and continue with this criticism .
Regard Fegelein :scootangel:

Great job for violating Hanlon's Razor!

TAB

1705384 Screw vegatarianism, we got bacon! Bacon > Anything else edible to man

As for the story, I quit as soon as AJ ordered chicken.

TWE's Scribblestick here to identify the source of the downvote swarm! :pinkiehappy:

First off, your paragraphs are too long. You should break them up to make it more readable. Also, only one character should speak per paragraph.

Second, you have a lot of run-on senences. For example:

Applejack approached the restaurant, its white metal sheet walls bounced off applejacks eyes, making her blink rapidly and shield herself from the light.

Each sentence should contain one idea. This has two: AJ approaching the restaurant, and the restaurant's appearance.

Applejack approached the restaurant. Its white metal sheet walls bounced off applejacks eyes, making her blink rapidly and shield herself from the light.

While we're looking at this sentence, "applejacks" should be capitalized and have an apostrophe: "Applejack's." There are similar capitalization errors throughout.

ever since equestria was somehow teleported to earth through another dimension

Um... all right then.

The chicken for started was undercooked, blood mixed with the juice of the vegetables, and the chicken was still partially cold. The vegetables on the other hand were old, the peppers and onions wrinkles up and were a dark brown, and hard pieces of mold and applejack might of even spotted a maggot feasting on the veggies. The waitress asked if she wanted another glass of water, she quickly agreed, the odd tasting water would have to help her conquer her twelve dollar buffet of fold and undercooked chicken.

Wat. She's actually going to eat this? Why?

a small nickel she found at the bottom of her pocket

When did AJ start wearing clothes with pockets? Unless it's on her hat. That could be cool, I guess.

the contents of the meal flew out of her mouth and onto the sidewalk

Wouldn't it have been thrown up earlier?

So... yeah. Mostly, this is just kind of gross. Besides the fact that ponies are vegetarians, the "food" is absurdly gross to the point that no one in their rght mind would every consider eating it. Plus, the formatting and mechanics leave much to be desired. Glad to hear you're looking for an editor. At least you're trying to make it better.

On that note, hope this helps! :twilightsmile:

~Scribblestick, TWE's notoriously friendly moderator

wow... just wow... I don;t know if I should be angry or disappointed... let me do both

If this is a troll fic: It isn't funny... this is like sweet apple massacre with less shock value. Get help...

if this is a real fic: Don't get an editor, he'll commit suicide. You need to use spell check. Not having an editor is no excuse for completly shit writing. Even ignoring the run on sentences, confusing wording, and huge ass paragraphs you still can't read this due to the insane level of elementary spelling mistakes. Please at least put a BIT of effort into quality control. Due keep practicing, but get some help from your colleagues/parents/friends.

1705249
*Clapping*
Nice in character comment
*Continue to clap*

1705639
Thanks, I been working on a story where Apple Jack is one of the lead characters, so I had practice.

1705681
I see that.:twilightsmile:
Pretty good.

...
...
...
*catches fire*

Of all fanfics I have read, this was certainly one of them.
Good job on that. :moustache:

1704797
It certainly did.

>Sees fic title
>Can't believe somebody would write about this
>Reads fic

1705171 Yes, actual Chinese food is pretty good. Its much better when compared to American Chinese food.

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