- Member Since 27th Jun, 2012
- offline last seen Feb 24th, 2023
starshine_dash
Been writing since high school. It's rare for a fandom to inspire fiction in me, and MLP:FiM has done so. So, here I am.
starshine_dash
Joined 27th Jun, 2012 ·
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This premise is so overdone and some of it seems like a total ripo--
>furniture
...wat
Edit: And now I'm disappointed because there was nothing to do with furniture. I was hoping for a fic where Chrysalis had decided to impersonate the matrimonial bed.
I assume you were trying to make a pun on the name Cadenza? It's not credenza. Cadenza is a musical term. Credenza is furniture.
The story itself is quite a different take on a familiar theme, but the revelations and emotions seem rushed and bogged down in exposition, losing believability. It loses a lot of believability anyway. I mean, changelings can fly.
Also, not sure about the sex tag. From the end of the chapter I assume Twilight will go around seducing her friends or something. Is that really worth dynamically changing a character for?
denver.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw4647-Rarity_Derelle_Duckface.png
Changeling Twilight! YesssssS!
Yeah, what's with the furniture? Is Cadence now Princess Mi Amore Credenza? (I admit it, I stole that pun from another story)
Whaat? I am bored of these changeling stories EVERYWHERE. Can I have a break? The writing is fairly good, apply to something original and you will have struck gold.
Hmm, interesting. I want more!
Let me guess: everyone gets laid except Spike. Again. The fact that it looks like he's going to spend the night with three fillies younger than him makes it look that way.
1670066
*directs you at the pile of fics she has also written*
I have never heard anyone around where I live pronounce the R in Credenza so... and there's also the Twilight goes insane fic where she uses a come to life spell on her Credenza and her armoire... My brain is a magical place.
1670122
Spike gets laid, eventually, but by whom may surprise you.
and yeah, I know changeling Twilight is "overdone" but I owed someone some clop and they wanted Changeling Twilight.
It was that or My LIttle Pony: Polyamoury is Complicated.
I at least hope that those of you ( 1670066 1669936 ) who are sick of said changelingtwi fics give this at least a little chance. I'm going to try to go a different direction than "seduce all friends, turn ponyville into hive."
1669951
This is the best face for Rarity.
LOL. I just imagined Pony Joe, Princess Celestia, and Princess Luna, watching Twilight lay waste to Canterlot, jaws dropped. And then Pony Joe turning to the two princesses, smug as hell, mumbling, "Pay up, both of ya". :P
1669936
LOL. God, THAT would be awkward.
static.fimfiction.net/images/characters/shining-armor.png D: No shower is cold enough to remove the memories...
1670736
You owed someone clop.
No offense but if I reached a point in my life where I owed someone erotic fanfiction, I would need to take a good long look at just what went wrong to bring me to such a scenario.
1671288
It's less "I owe them because I'm a horrible failure at life" and more "I promised it to them like a year ago and never came through, so."
This's an interesting prospect. I wonder where this will go.
1671332
To be fair, I intended the implication to be snarky ironic bemusement rather than "oh god why, FML."
My tongue was in my cheek so hard I was basically making out with myself. Which was pretty hot, actually.
1671935
Sounds... deliciously kinky. Or would that be kinkily delicious? I'm not sure. Anyway, Twilight just started clopping while Chyrsalis does things so I gotta get back to writing that.
A little rushed at times, but very very promising.
My curiosity is, for certain, piqued. It's like the story I read a few days ago, but much less dark and angsty. Should be interesting to see how it plays out.
1670736 my interest is rekindled.
Can't review propperly at present, but don't listen to the haters, they're so caught up in what the think is repetition that they failed to see the originality.
For example, I've not yet seen one in which Chrysalis passes on her title.
Keep going, you have my interest and an upvote.
Honora Imperator
I like it.
OH nice, loved that ending scene, laughed my ass off.
Oh this just got immensely more interesting. And it was pretty good to start with.
denver.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw1126_my-little-pony-friendship-is-magic-brony-im-with-twilight-on-this-one.gif
Imma watching this.
well that escalated quickly...
It begins.
That's a good idea, separating the clop like that. Many skilled authors who aren't afraid to add clop do something similar.
Let the fapping commence...
If you hadn't already assured us that Spike will get with a mare, I would be mad all over again that Twilight is going behind his back to get it on with his crush. He trusts her, dammit!
Well sorry to say but there went all my intrest.
was really looking forward to the interesting dynamic of twilights embarrassed reactions and the banter between her and the former queen.
reguadless hope the rest of the story gos well
1684950
There's still going to be that? I'm just not doing the actual clop?
meh
1684972
That's part of what I was intrested in. Watching chrysalis embarrassing the crap out of twilight while she's trying to have sex with her friends was a concept I found intersting.
Other than that sounds ok
1685226
Ah, well, sorry. I just... it's not working. I'm not going to write something I'm not happy with, let alone post it. It'd be worse than Fifty Shades of Grey.
1685260
Perfectly understandable and it still sounds neat and as long as you enjoy writing the story that's really all that matters
Damn, sorry to see that you are unhappy with your clop-writing.
Still, this shaped up to be a great Fic and the lack of on-screen sex by no means deters me.
Do continue.
For Great Justice!
I'm just here for the story really. I've been getting into the stories with Twilight being turned into a changeling.
So sad to see you're unhappy with the clop scene. Probably for the better since you can now change the rating to teen.
1685538
I'd have to delete the scene in the first chapter.
I have to say, A lot of writer's don't know when they can't write something. Nice to see one who does! Maybe with some practice you'll end up writing some funny sex scenes but Don't let the lack of it deter you. I'll for one be loving this story just as much!
1685750
Well, one day I might do a humanized ponies story, and then, oh the sex they can have. Most of my knowledge ends when you remove fingers from the equation.
This story doesn't really need clop I like it anyway, but if you really want to write clop you can always try reading some for Ideas as to how it works with 2 ponies. But yeah I don't really care in this ones case a humerous Twilight as a changeling sounds great to me as is (For the most part Dark and/or tragic stories are not my thing, some of them can pique my interest but in the end I tend to regret reading them, I like happy endings).
Hey as long as it's a good fic who cares about clop. I'ma stick around to see where this goes.
Clop or no clop- the story is based on originality and giggles. 10/5 for you.
You know... You could TRY to write the clop, and ask for feedback.
Listen to your readers.
Practice...
And become better!
There goes my wing bonner!
I can't speak for the guys who are interested in only the cloppy sections (I tend to skip over those myself), but I'm here because of the strong storyline, and I will stay for the storyline. So don't worry, write on!
It is so good to writer who can admit when they don't know how to write something. It's especially refreshing when you've recently been in an argument with the king of stuck-up jackasses "FelixDawn"
Also, I personally think it's a good idea that you're avoiding the clop scenes. I've seen many a good fic ruined because they slowly changed into nothing more than an over-complicated clop fic.
1704008 damnit, now whenever I see that smiley all I'll be able to think is
"Dinkleberg..."
or "Lulamoon."
... FUCK now I have random ideas!
WHAT?!
1704462
WHAT?!
...kinda short chapter.
YAYA YA YAAAAAAAAA YA YA YA YA OOHHH GOODNESS "WHAT?!" THAT YA YA JUST YA MADE YA MY DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
