I need HELP and the website isn't letting me write a blog
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Spike has always felt helpless.....weak.
He couldn't face the teenage dragons....
he always ran away from danger.
However, instincts awaken that start forcing him to change...to grow.
The Earth Dragons....descendants of stranded Sangheili....
Maybe he can grow stronger to protect his friends....
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It's got potential the story's a little blocky and really rushed. Twilight was out of character she would have try and fallowed him that probably could have been elaborated on.
Ha!! Using a plasma sword to kill Chrysalis, awesome!!
Quite hard to read the last passage. Could do with being broken down into more
paragraphs, but still, it's a very unique story, so lets see where it goes!!
cortana "uhh we don't know where the arbiter is chief."
MC "fine, spike your the new rainbo- arbiter."
1582717
Thanks. This is my story here, so I'm still learning about the way stories look like after being posted. I will try to adjust it to make it easier to read.
1582095
There are some episodes to me where Twilight seems OOC-especially dragon quest.
My idea is that Twilight is more about helping her friends, and would be more worried about her friends being happy than doing everything she wants. Unfortunately, I had to cut my chapter shorter than planned because the time I had to write was suddenly cut off. I will try to make it smoother.
My storyline also seemed long to me, so I may have intimidated myself as well....after writing many long college papers...
You really need to learn how to paragraph and indent. Go read this.
This has potential, but you need to fine tune your writing, slow the pace down a little and make it less OOC
this story is good but you may need to fix up your writing a bit.but other than that it is very well done
He's has tall has Rarity?. Did you mean Celestia?
M-M-M-MOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRR!!!!!!!
1585923
No. Rarity.
Spike will be Celestia's size, but only when he is fully grown.
He still has some aging to do yet.
1583505
Understood. Now that I have a little time, I've spaced it out better.
Thanks, that document was very helpful!
1584563
Path-of-cloud gave me a great deal of advice by sending a link to a document of writing tips, so he has my undying thanks.
What really got me was the format differences from the site I'm used to using.
I'm used to writing a document and uploading it, not having to copy and paste it. 
Needless to say, my writing has nothing to do but improve.
1586858
I'm glad someone else likes it.
I looked over my original plan for chapter 2 was looked over by myself and I literally had "Rarity moments" where I was picking the good stuff from the garbage when reading it, so it had to be re-worked. 
Expect it soon! 
Please keep reviewing when this updates, your comments keep me going-even through college finals
1584429
Spike seems a little OOC, but it will be explained during talks about his training when he had reached the "sacred home of the Earth Dragon's ancestors". Funny your ID is a SPARTAN though, Spike's ancestors are stranded Elites!
3654946
I take that as a good thing, I hope?
3655008
This is decent story idea that I didn't think it was going to be fully explored. Good to have you back dude.
3655144
Thanks. I got stalled by some tough college classes.
The good thing is that it allowed me to look over and revamp the series as I started nitpicking things that I couldn't help but change.
Expect this story to go through seasons 3,4.....and beyond!
Oh jeez there was a story about Spike being a warrior already on here.
fuckin'... i'm late
3655215 If that's the case then you're way late.
1582095 *followed. fallow is when you leave a field out to recover from crops or cattle.
3655163 does the derp side have cookies?
3655008
3655215
I actually got inspired for this story watching some friends of mine play the HALO games.
The Sangheili (aka "Elites") almost looked like armored versions of a "teenage Spike" (minus the back scales)
I'm actually looking forward to seeing what you come up with, as I'm a huge fan of yours
3655228
Cookies, Muffins, cupcakes, and pies for everypony!
3655253 *pop* yay!
3655250 ... orly? Lovely~ My story, Dragon Warrior, is simply taking a long, long, long time to update. x3
3655300
Also, like Spike, the Elites can be...witty when coming up with remarks. (For example: In HALO 3 when you stare at one at his eyes he will occasionally say "Yes. They are the windows to my soul. Now stop! "
)
Or can have trouble coming up with them. (Same game, one tried to thank the player for receiving a better weapon with "You have many brains, on your face."......yeah....
)
3655413 hah. In my case, I take my inspiration from several Japanese shows and manga while attempting to maintain a more religious aspect (like the Covenant) while still being somewhat Americanized (and henceforth more accessible to the readers).
3655431
interesting. Kind of like what they did wit the Elites in the games according to my friend. Some of the things they mentioned for those aliens have parallels to the Japanese Samurai.
1) their sense of honor
2) a warrior's death is the most honorable-many captured Sangheili commit ritualistic suicide to retain honor
3) They are he only species in the game (besides humans who pick up their plasma swords after they die) to wield a blade in battle.
4) Their honor stems from following their leaders (like the Samurai's Shogun) and defending their families. There was a tale told of a single Sangheili who went up against a ENTIRE BATTALION (which included a tank) to avenge his murdered wife....and died taking them ALL out!
3655465 Indeed. The Sangheili consider it dishonourable if they run from a fight henceforth why a ton of them died. Also why the Arbiter was being put on trial at the beginning of Halo 2.
They definitely mirror the Samurai. x3
3655512
I'd still hate to come across one in a dark ally, though.....especially armed....
3655516 Yikes.
3655516 Especially since they're like 9 feet tall. Remember, these guys stand taller than most Spartans, who all push 8 feet. 9-12 feet of height... ('#_#)
3655533
Yeah. Thel 'Vadam (The Arbiter) was a shrimp in Elite size, yet still taller than Master Chief!
Spike left a few months ago and he's now a Major.
I've always respected the Sangheili as a threat in any battle, interested to see where this story leads.
Things should be interesting when Spike faces off against King Sombra.
3658367
Definitely, though it will be "a couple months after the treaty" to allow Spike to grow more, about "5 hooves tall"
3655802
Sangheili fun fact: Minor is the lowest rank, followed by Major. Surviving Sangheili who don't increase rank from Minor to Major after their first battle commit suicide to retain honor.
3658372
5 hooves tall----would this be roughly the size of the Alicorns, specifically Luna? I ask because Celestia looks to be at least 8 hooves tall, Twilight and her friends are about 2 hooves tall, and Shining looks to be about the same size as Luna and Cadence, roughly 3.5 hooves tall.
And roughly, I have to think 5 hooves == 6'0" as far as height is concerned, am I close??
Personally, it seems that this would be better served that all ponies and dragons concerned should be anthrothized. If they were anthro, it would make more sense (well to me, at least), especially with all the armor that Spike currently wears now.
that was the funnies thing I heard (read) in a long while... Kudos
3659642
Yes, you are correct at you estimates.
The SMALLEST Sangheili is nine feet tall, and they can easily reach 12 feet tall.
You almost never see them bigger, though. The Earth Dragon's inherited this size factor
3659500 Are you telling me that for this Sangheili fellows the rank of Major is so inferior that they can earn it after ONE battle?
That's some interesting military group.
Sadly, is not interesting enough to make up for all the story's flaws. Like the fact you've been doing everything in your power to make Spike look like a badass. Like having a flawless victory over a foe that two minutes ago defeated a godlike creature; even though Spike is among the lowest ranks of his own army.
Now I can only assume how overpower will you make the dragon generals...
But there is nothing technically "Wrong" or "Bad" abut the story so far. A bit rushed maybe. But not too much. Still, there are many things you could improve.
3660546
Yeah. As the story progresses I will have flashbacks to show the Tartarus-like training Spike went through (like I did with the first glimpse with his sword training in chapter 4) to receive those skills.
One thing you have to remember is that Spike arrived unexpectedly in chapter 1. Chrysalis did not expect another opponent, and thus did not know anything he could do: his future foes do not make that same mistake thanks to Spike being "on-site".
Another thing I will reveal is that (as of chapter 3) despite being an Ultra-Rank (the third lowest), the Grand Councilor-his grandfather-put him through both Honor Guard training: for those one-step below the highest rank, but also had Special-operations (jetpack) Earth Dragons in order to keep his grandson from meeting the same terrible fate as his parents.
In order-in the future "season 4 episode" "power ponies" The group will not only go through that comic world (showing that Spike-although matured-still has some of his childhood personality) but also Pinkie sets down a graphic novel.....of the Sangheili's battle on Installation 00 (Aka: "The Ark")
The Ranks I listed in chapter 4, from lowest to highest, are: Minor, Major, Ultra, Zealot, General, Shogun, Warrior, Honor Guard, and Grand Councilor.
Do not take this message as me defending my mistakes: by all means show them to me! I love learning where I can improve!
3659642
Well, come to think of it, that wasn't what I had originally planned.
I'm counting a "hoof" equivalent of a "foot".
I'm counting Rarity and the Mane 6 as "approximately 3 1/2 hooves tall-some only reaching that to their horn (coughrarityandtwilightcouch), while others stand at a mere 3 hooves.
Celestia is 7 and1/2 hooves, Luna is five hooves, and Cadence as well as Shining Armor are 4 hooves. Right now, Spike is tied with Shining Armor in height.
3655249
That is a very fitting song for the Sangheili's battle-beliefs
. I also found a song that will be used. 
1585923
OOPS! Meant Shining Armor! Fixing that now.