"Do-be-lee-doo," Caboose sung, sitting on the ground of the library, scribbling on a piece of paper with a green crayon as he had been for the past half hour.
"Oh, hey, Caboose. I was wondering who was making that noise" Church muttered, looking down at him as he came down the stairs. "What are you doing?"
"I am writing a story to end all stories! It will have t-shirt rexes and lots of milk for their cookies!" Caboose said happily as his scrawling hastened.
"Sounds... good?" Church asked himself.
"Hello, my name is private Dexter Grif from the unjustifiably popular series for how shit it is; My Little Caboose," Grif boomed pleasantly as he kicked open the door to the library and walked inside.
"And I am private Dick Simmons from the same fiction," Simmons said formally as he strolled in with his partner.
"Oh, this stuff again," Church muttered, turning around. "I'll be upstairs. If you need me, don't hesitate to ask someone else."
"What you just saw Caboose partake in was a wonderful process called 'writing'."
"But what is writing, Simmons?" Grif inquired curiously.
"I am making words with a pencil!" Caboose piped.
"Well said, Caboose. You see, Grif. Writing is something people do when they feel creative and have little to no talent when it comes to music or drawing," Simmons explained. "In fact, many writers don't even have a talent for writing."
"Wow, that must suck to be them," Grif whistled.
"I'm sure it does, Grif," Simmons agreed seriously. "But enough about others. To start us off, how about we talk about how to get noticed for your writing?"
"I'm sure that is what most people are here for," Grif said with a nod as he turned towards the camera. "You see, there are several different things you can do to get noticed by others. The most important ones are spelling and a picture for your title art."
"Having a description that is unoriginal and riddled with spelling errors makes it very difficult to get noticed. Having spelling errors in your description if a major turn off for potential readers. You want to lure them in with a hook," Simmons said with a smile. "Cover art is another thing that goes a long way towards being noticed. Asking a friend or commissioning an artist to make you some title art shows readers that you're serious about your story."
"But make sure that the description and cover art fit well together. It would be awfully strange to have your description talking about a romantic comedy while the cover art is of a guy holding a gun to his head."
"Another way you can get noticed is by befriending a popular author and having them plug your work," Simmons went on. "By having them advertise your story, you can get a lot of views that way."
"Now that you know how to get noticed, it's time to start on your story. Let's pick a genre," Grif said."You may be saying to yourself; 'Wow, there are so many to choose from. How am I going to pick?'"
"An easy way to do this is to think about what you like," Simmons said firmly. "You can even choose multiple genres to write about in a story. Just make sure they don't conflict, because then you just look like a fool."
"A safe bet is always crossover stories with comedy in them," Grif said slyly. "I mean, think about it. Crossovers are the lazy man's way out. Not only are you mixing two worlds, you already have a bunch of people willing to read your work simply based off the fact that it's something they like to read or watch. And you don't even have to create your own characters!"
"But you still do want to find something original that people would be interested in reading."
"Of course. Nobody wants to read something they've seen a million times before."
"What comes next is a big one. Planning ahead," Simmons continued. "You don't want to write for a few days just to find yourselves written into a wall. Plan out your story so you know where you're going. You don't want to sit down with no idea how your chapter is going to end. Only a complete idiot does that."
"Please note that the author of this story doesn't really do this," Grif said quietly. "In fact, he sits down having no idea where the hell he left off."
"A third thing to have is the characters. While it is already frowned upon by many to put yourself into a story, don't put a damn super hero into a story and claim it's you."
"Yeah. Nobody wants to hear a story about how you're a ladies man who is master of kung fu, can get into a flawless relationship with several girls at the same time and can do anything with no problem," Grif chuckled. "Only Hugh Hefner and Chuck Norris' love child can do that."
"Please note that the author of this story owns the characters Hugh Norris, Chuck Hefner, and every other combination of the two," Grif added.
"A fourth thing that could be of use is-"
"You know, I write in my diary a lot, so maybe I could help with this," a flamboyant voice said from outside the library.
"Donut, we keep telling you, you're not coming in until later!" Grif yelled hoarsly.
"But I want to come in now!" he pouted. "I want to come in as hard and fast is I can, but gracefully enough that people reading aren't hurt by it. I want to be there by your sides during the climax."
"Donut, please, we're in the middle of-" Simmons began, but was interrupted when a tall, pink soldier crawled through the door. "God damn it..."
"Wow, I forgot how small you guys are as cute little ponies," Donut cooed as he approached Grif and Simmons. "You're, like, only four feet tall. I could just eat you up."
"We're not little ponies, we are medium-sized stallions!" Simmons snapped as Donut began hugging Grif.
"Wash?" Grif wheezed loudly, looking out the door.
"Yeah, yeah, I got it," Wash muttered, crawling in through the door. "Come on, Donut. You're being stupid. Which for you is pretty normal."
"But I want to talk about writing!" he whined, tightening his grip on Grif.
"Listen, we have to go back out and get ready for when we actually come into the story, alright?" Wash sighed as he pulled Donut away from Grif, letting the orange stallion have some breathing room.
"Yeah, sorry for the delays, guys," Doc said, poking his head in through the door.
"For crying out loud, why not get everybody in here?" Grif moaned, rubbing his face.
"I don't think there's room for everybody. But, hey! I guess we could try," Doc said happily as he turned to face the door. "Lopez, Sister, get in here for a sec."
"No, stay out there!" Grif yelled in frustration, slamming the door shut when he saw Lopez beginning to enter.
"Jeez, calm down, buddy," Doc chuckled, shaking his head as he began to smile under his helmet. "Anyways, DarkWing is making some pretty big plans for when we come in, and boy, is it a doozy. It won't be for another few dozen chapters, though, so you're going to have to hold onto your hats."
"We get hats?" Caboose gasped hopefully.
"Christ, this session is spiraling out of control," Grif grunted as he turned to Simmons with a raised brow. "Want to give up?"
"We're only a fifth done what we were going to go over!"
"That's like thirteen percent. Multiply that by five and that's ninety, and that's an F plus. That's a passing grade, Simmons, and I am alright with that."
"Nothing of what you just said was true, but I can tell something will interrupt us if we try to say anything more," Simmons grumbled, beginning to walk towards the door. "Might as well do something that isn't a complete waste of time."
"Does that mean I can talk about writing advice?" Donut asked happily.
"Knock yourself out," Grif said as he walked out the door with Simmons, slamming it shut behind them.
lol, i always love PSA's. whether it's from the show or in these fics
fillydelphia.com/g4/data/551-827.png/Xeno-Scorpion-Alien-551-MLP+halo+Caboose.png
The problem isn't the ending, it's the beginning. Meh, oh well. I'll figure something out. Thanks for the advice.
Anger management?
ha donut. its good to see that everyone else is going to be in the story but im conserned about too many characters, now that would be a doosy
just keep up the good work and make it interesting then you will be fine
can t shirt rexes be a thing now???i demand it be cannon please
Possible PSA: That's How Magic Works?
Caboose is a writer of greatness. I just am not entirely sure that having the word greatness in your story makes it worth reading.
A psa about psa's.
Glad to see you're not taking yourself seriously, lol.
Also, looks like you will be writing good for Donut. Unless you just finished too soon... finished using all your material that is... hmm I'm not good at this.
2454028
You know the RvB bits that take place inside Caboose's head? I imagine it would be sort of like that.
A PSA about how to pick up mares.
"Having a description that is unoriginal and riddled with spelling errors makes it very difficult to get noticed. Having spelling errors in your description if a major turn off for potential readers. You want to lure them in with a hook,"
Having spelling errors in your description if a major turn off for potential readers.
spelling errors in your description if a major turn off
Not sure if intentional or completely brilliant fucking irony!
PSA about Alicorns and Alicorn OCs, and explain why some are good, but most of them are absolutly terrible.
PSA on writing perfect shippable characters, but not shipping them together. I'm sure that should be easy..
<3
I'm just wondering where Agent Washington is. Seriously, why didn't he ever appear? Will he ever appear? Will the Alpha ever be back? I liked him a lot more than Epsilon. Is Discord really evil? Why am I asking so many questions? If only I knew.
Might I suggest that the web series rvb characters from after season 11 meet there my little caboose counter parts from in between the last story and this one?
PSA ideas; Magic, Pony races, Zebras, Crystals, Bits, basic fan theory stuff... oh that's a good on Fan Theories.
Also, Caboose needs a hat. I don't want Caboose to be poor and Irish!
PSA: Hay-lo or Judging fans
You are a trrroooooolllll Darkwing. lolz i was SO excited when i saw i had a new notification for this story. so i clicked it scrolled down to see the chapter name and saw: PSA: Writing Advice. it made me go FFFFFFUUUUUUUUUU XD still love the story and can't wait for more actual chapters :D
2454420
Indeed, it was intentional.
2454099
All my YES!
Donut's coming in? What about Sister and Juniour? PLEASE!!!!
PSA on improvised development of pre-made characters.
2454394
Given by Tucker. :v
PSA: Bronies
I wonder what the Blood Gulch gang has to say about us.
PSA: Friendzone
*Cough* Involving Tucker and Simmons
"Today we are going to teach you about the friendzone." Tucker said with a sly grin. "Although I guess I really wouldn't know anything about that."
2454997 Griff needs some serious proof that Sister actually died. He frequently refers back to an incident in which Sister fell through a frozen over river and was recovered 3 hours later not only totally fine, but pregnant. Her character is so hilariously awful that she's pretty much guaranteed to show up here sooner or later.
2454084 It'd be awesome with Sarge trying to explain it with voodoowitchcraftjerseydevilthingamajigsn'such.
I want Tucker to sing this when he finally 'gets it on' with Rainbow
[youtube=lQlIhraqL7o]
2454072
They already have something better
PAS: Estrous cycle
There was talk about doing a chapter with something like this right?
2455571 nearly lost it when i saw that
2455926 Just google "The Far Side." The guy writes all kinds of funny shit like that.
Possible PSA's:
Nightmare Night/Halloween
Type 1 Diabetes
So the other guys are going to come in awesome!
2454870
There homosexual fags.
Sounds like something church would say.
So when the others join, I'm guessing they're going to be humans for several chapters until Celestia finds out about them?
Or will they stay human?
PSA: keeping sanity in a world not your own?
PSA: science and religion in equestria
PSA: dealing with difficult people
I can't wait for them all to come in (if they seriously are). Gah! I know this is biased (obviously) but it still feels like the Meta will be in this story at some point. Unless...
Madre de Dios
Discord takes over the Meta's mind since he is already crazy, but is then affected by the Meta's want for the fragments and goes after them all. Oh, whoops sorry. Got a little carried away there
Anyways, it's an idea right? I mean if you would like to use it . Well, great PSA!
2455996 DIABETES!!!!!!!!!
Hmm... PSA on dealing with falling potatoes?
D:
2454406 Hey leave Wash out of that. Back with the Freelancers he was not a fighter but he apparently improved by season 7. 2458809 Yes it must happen, unfortunately it could also potentially happen with another already entered the story character, who is half women half shark, but the shark half was given cybernetic powers, the women half is also part jaguar or whatever.
because yes Carolina must come back at some point.
Also for a PSA a study performed by Sarge and Simmons concerning the quality of the soldiers in Equestria. (That could be fun because to this point the Royal Guards have done absolutely nothing for the series.)
2464491 But maybe she learned a lesson (or two) and is now going to help the B.G. team out against the Meta.
the PSA's are always funny and haha "dick" simmons he must have a big one.
A PSA with Sarge and Caboose regarding foal sitting. For games, Sarge would have some great war simulations, and Caboose would go O,Malley-boose for a second when Sarge accidently says baby instead of foal.
2464753 I kind of have to disagree with that in that she didn't change in the actual series until she talked with Church, so unless she went to an Equestrian therapy session I'm not sure how likely it is that she's changed. But who knows maybe Darkwing will choose to show some of the light in her. If not Tex is still there to counter Carolina.
2486079
Tucker?
i.imgur.com/qOx8mjO.jpg