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  • T Subjunctive

    In this romance of language and culture, a changeling linguist struggles to salvage what remains of the failed invasion of Canterlot with only himself, his words, and his deception as his weapons.
    119,880 words · 3,227 views  ·  209  ·  10
  • T And I Asked Why

    They said I was the Element of Loyalty, but to whom and to what do my loyalties lie?
    21,134 words · 10,166 views  ·  887  ·  83
  • T Blank Slate

    Littlepip has always felt a complete disconnect between her thoughts and her environment. When a strange encounter in the basement churns up her thoughts, she reaches out for support. But whom to trust? Based on the Fallout: Equestria universe.
    69,585 words · 499 views  ·  33  ·  5
  • T Aureax Ferri

    A side-story to Ordo ab Chao: A young inventor takes drastic measures to ensure that the government of the Union sees his machine for the genius it is.
    28,298 words · 184 views  ·  7  ·  2

Blog Posts30

  • 3w, 2d
    Written, read, and awaiting publishing

    So, that’s it.

    There are four more updates left in Subjunctive, all proofread and loaded up in the queue. They’re rather short, so next Monday, I’ll be publishing one per day.

    This story has been a part of my life for the past two years, and it feels strange to be letting it go. No more will it be nagging me from the corner of my hard drive; no more will my laziness be incited to action. The story is done, there it is, I leave it be, and I continue on with my life.

    It’s been a lot of fun. I ran into trouble, anxiety, had many personal adventures and completed personal milestones, changed a lot as a person, and made a new friend. Some of these were connected to the writing of this novel directly, others happened while this novel sat in the background, etching itself into the vague memories of this period of my life along with the vivid ones, an integral and inextricable part.

    The support you guys have shown me has been marvelous. Pretty much when I published my first story, I’ve checked every day to see if I have any alerts. Your comments have been a pleasure to read. But the comments concerning the story outside of this little hub we call FimFic, though they were few and happened infrequently, were a joy unprecedented to the career of this little pony fiction writer, not to mention the inspiration I gave to one user such as to compose an original piece of music based on the story.

    My only regret is that it took as long as it did. It was incredibly unreasonable for me to ask that you wait so long for such a thing. But I really hope that it was worth it.

    2 comments · 61 views
  • 12w, 3d

    Hello, readers!

    In case you don't read the comment section to Subjunctive, FimFic user ph00tbag made a song inspired by the novel:

    I don't really listen to music when writing, and when I do it tends to be of the romantic vein (Tchaikovsky 4 life), but it's really awesome to see someone make a derivative art piece based on what I wrote. I've always had fantasies of my stories becoming popular enough such that people do their own spin-off creations of it, but it's never happened before. Thank you, ph00tbag; you seriously just made my day and fulfilled a fantasy of this pony fiction writer. It thrills me that you like the story so much! Subjunctive is drawing to a close. I think there're about six or seven more chapters after this one, and then it's done. I hope you like how it ends!

    Also, new chapter today. Go read!

    Edit: In case my stoic and reserved style didn't communicate it clearly enough, I'm seriously delighted by this work, ph00tbag. I'm—and I hate this word, but—squeeing really hard right now. It's truly wonderful. Thank you, thank you, again and again. :twilightsmile:

    1 comments · 90 views
  • 16w, 14h

    At the time of my writing this, it’s 1:47 a.m. Eastern Standard Time, and I’ve just fulfilled my promise to myself: the epilogue of Subjunctive is done—and, with that, the rough draft of the novel!

    I did it. I promised myself I'd finish the novel during this break. I've done it, and with two days to spare!

    When I wrote the first words of this story—back in what, 2013?—I had vague ideas for this novel. I knew I wanted to write about changelings, but what can I do with them? Language, linguistics—there’s a novel, I said. But then I reached the second chapter and production stalled. I realized that the conception of this novel wasn’t done. I had the framework for a potential plot and some general ideas, but had no idea how it would develop or how it would play out.

    This is the equivalent of a builder having a few beams towering above him but no idea what to coat it with. He thinks that putting glass on it would be cool, but when and where?

    I thought that perhaps the story and the characters were just bad, and I had pretty much mentally abandoned the novel altogether. But after talking it out with my good friend and editor, I had some sparks of inspiration and managed to conceive of a fully functioning novel, complete with plot, conflict, and themes. And now, nearly two years after I had the first inklings of this novel, the rough draft is done.

    I've certainly learned my lesson! And this goes for every aspiring writer: PLAN A NOVEL OUT COMPLETELY BEFORE WRITING ANY LINES OF PROSE. Good thing I made this mistake now, writing pony fiction, which is supposed to be the training grounds before I become a novelist proper.

    I once again apologize to the readers I had before, who were reading this since 2013 before the EQD publication, and are still reading it. No writer could reasonably expect you to still be following, and I’m incredibly grateful that you still are. My only hope is that the story is as awesome as to justify your waiting time.

    My work is not done on Subjunctive. There’s still a lot of editing to do. Who knows what needs to be rewritten and thought over? But, on the bright side, my time working on this will be purely spent on editing and publication; thus, in theory, chapters should be published at a much more regular rate.

    The new chapter should be here this week, and the rest of the story will follow. Brace yourselves!

    2 comments · 62 views
  • 17w, 22h
    The End is Nigh

    Dear readers,

    I have a ten day respite from work, ten days in which my writing, reading, and playing of Kerbal Space Program will compete for the task I set myself to during this time. But during these ten days, I’ve made it my goal to finish Subjunctive.

    As of this moment, I’m writing the story’s climax. After that, I have two or three more chapters to write, then an epilogue. After that, I will be working through my backlog of chapters (I currently have five chapters written and unedited) to get them to you as quickly as possible. That means that there are seven or eight more chapters to go. They span about 1.5k-3k words each, though two are about 5k-6k. All in all, I estimate that the entire story will be 110k-130k words by the time it’s finished.

    The next chapter should be here next week. The chapter after that might take longer, seeing how long it is (maybe I can split it into two chapters), and it marks the beginning of the final arc. I’m quite content with how it’s coming out, and I’m very excited to show it to you.

    It’s quiet on this front. Just chugging away at this novel and fighting procrastination (to which, I suppose in hindsight, the writing of this blog didn’t conduce). I probably won’t be able to publish the whole thing by the end of this summer, but hopefully publication will be done by the end of the year.

    Thanks for bearing with me this whole time. Also, please leave comments! I don’t respond to them in the comment thread, mostly because I don’t want to confirm or deny the validity of a reading experience, but I enjoy reading the comments, the discussions, and gauging reactions. It helps me grow as a writer.

    2 comments · 69 views
  • 27w, 1d
    De Brevitate Meorum Capitulorum/Concerning the Shortness of My Chapters

    Salvete, lectores mei. Hoc bloggum facio ut modo Subjunctive capitulum novum paene perfectum esse dicam. Erit brevium (inter verba millia aut dua), sed habere capitulum secundum ad vos cum celeritate hoc capitulo quodam volo. Est aestas, etsi mihi occupatio aestatis est, scribere quantitatem magnam operis meis possum. Posse complere hanc fabulam ante finem aestatis cogito.

    Fortasse interrogatis cur capitula mea singulariter brevia sint. Sunt rationes nonnullae. Cogito generaliter fabulas quae capitula brevia habeant faciliores legendo esse; capitula per se sunt consistendo pro legendo scribendoque loci innati. Insuper, propter seriem naturam fabularum mearum, facilior mihi et ita lectoribus meis magis placet est scribere vulgareque saepius capitula brevia; proinde capitula plura do recepioque frequentius attentionem ab additione capitulorum novorum.

    Sed est ratio alia. Modus operandi meus est scribere magna quisquiliarum tunc dare ad editorem meum ut dicat quid bonum sit foedumque. Capitulum crudum ante editorem meum paene quisqulias habet paucaque bonorum. Thematibus saepe pecco, sententiae meae nimis longae sunt alogaeque, personae dramatis imparia faciunt, etc. Editor meus egoque faeces verborum secamus ac cremum consequitur. Sic longus est modus scribendi.

    In summa, capitulum posterum mox ibit. Gratias vobis pro legendo ago.


    On the shortness of my chapters,

    Hello, my readers. I’m making this blog post to say that the next chapter of Subjunctive is almost done. It will be short (between a thousand to two thousand words), but I hope to have the chapter after that to you quickly. It’s summer, and though I have a summer job, I find that I can still get a lot of writing done on this story. I think I can complete this story before the end of summer.

    You might be asking why my chapters are so short. There are a few reasons. I think in general that novels that have short chapters are easier to read for the reason that chapters in themselves give natural stopping points both for reading and writing. In addition, due to the serial nature of my novel, it’s both easier for me to write and publish more frequently short chapters and thus get more attention from the frequent updates, and it pleases my readers.

    But there is another reason. My modus operandi is to write a good amount of garbage and then give it to my editor so he can tell me what is good and what is shit.  The rough draft of a chapter before I give it to my editor has a lot of a garbage and very little good: I often screw up the themes, my sentences go on too long and often make no sense, my characters sometimes act in odd and inconsistent ways, etc. So my editor and I cut away the dregs of the words and the cream subsequently rises. Such is the long method of writing.

    In summary, the next chapter will be here soon. Thank you for reading.


    3 comments · 171 views
  • ...

One hundred eighty years before the first Nightmare Moon incident, the United Republic of Equestria is ruled by two prevailing parties and simply switches hooves between them every few years, as the citizens get more impatient and indecisive.

In the midst of the worst depression in Equestrian history, an egregious scandal befalls the United Party when the president of the country is found guilty at her trial following her impeachment, obliterating her and her party, and cementing any future victories of the Royal Party and their leader Princess Celestia.

Out of apathy, the United Party chooses Disce Cordis as their new leader�a strange draconequus with a piercing stare, an odd accent, and who can't even pronounce his opponent's name properly. He appears innocuous and ineffectual enough; but as his campaign goes on and he starts to gain more popularity, his strange speech and manner makes the citizens of Equestria suspect that, perhaps, the welfare of the Union isn't what is first and foremost in his mind.

First Published
15th Oct 2012
Last Modified
30th Nov 2012

Congrats on using valid Latin :)

The story is very irregularly structured, and the prologue spends too much time on dialog from characters who are long dead by the time of the main story.  The prologue should have been only a historical summary of critical events leading up to the present, instead of pointlessly verbose dialog from characters who in the space of half an hour manage to come up with a republic... a rather unbelievable set-up given that their previous 'government' was virtually a feudalistic society.  

Also, the first chapter's worth of events feel exceedingly rushed, reading like a very artificial set up to bring Discord into play.  I am also finding a depression hard to swallow given Equestria's enormous supply of resources and land, not to mention that most of the population lives in small towns and farms.  Depressions have very little effects on the majority of the population.  Plus, unless they have a stock-market based economy, money is based entirely on metal values which tend to be very steady in simple economies, making depressions impossible.  

There is not enough basis in the society as presented to justify the events, and hence the framework is very frail.

Though I am skeptical of the ability for one to simply announce a republic whilst still under the previous influence of serfdom and militaristic prowess, I can safely say that this story suspended my previous beliefs enough to believe that what transpired here could have occurred in reality.

Bravo, sir or madam. You have created an inspiring and believable piece of work, grammatically correct and as fluid as the clearest stream.

My only annoyance is the lack of yet more to read beyond this and the second chapter.

Also, as is necessary per the traditions of the internet, I claim my spot as first and foremost comment on this piece.


I can agree that the premise is unbelievable. But so too is the premise that ponies can talk, be in prismatic colors, and form any form of government.

Also, it is not impossible to believe that, given the poor conditions of their previous society, the gentry and their leaders would propose a balance of powers amongst themselves. There is a reason why Clover the Clever is so aptly named, and her recommendation further fits the element of harmony amongst ponies. What could be better than having a people so believing in friendship to vest power in their public? It makes sense, at least to me.

Furthermore, your opinions should be stated as such: opinions. A Prologue is set up as a prelude to further events, and the way the author presents it, I feel, is a very nice transition from show cannon to the fictional world presented. The dialogue is used a a relating point between the reader and the characters, and considering their prominence in beginning the first Republic in Equestria, I'd say it warrants a significant amount of dialogue between the characters. You should not confuse objectivity with subjectivity. It is a very grave mistake.

Lastly, the definition of a depression is as thus: a sustained,  long-term downturn of economic activity in one or more economies. Given that the gentry of the previous pony society had virtually no money, nor food to barter with, their was a significant lack of economic activity in the artisanry and agricultural (given the constant snowstorm). A metal-based economy is also prone to depression, as is evidenced by the American Economy: nearly every 20 years after the founding of the USA, there has been an economic depression, up until the gold standard was removed. And what is to say their economy is not based stock-based? Clearly the trading of interests in businesses is one that develops out of capitalism, which is not based on what the value of one's money is based on.

Try to not piss people off with faulty information. It does not bode well, for either yourself or others. Do try to enjoy fanfiction for what it is: fictional accounts of fantastical characters.

>>1433840  Those depressions were based on the fact that there WAS A STOCK MARKET!!!  The metal-based economies pre-stock market era did not have depressions.  They were only depressed when the royalty spent the entire treasury on wars and bankrupted itself.  In fact, markets based entirely on metals and products which can be sold or bartered are exceedingly stable.  They don't grow very fast, but neither are they subject to crashes.  

Note that in those early crashes, the effects almost entirely hit the city-dwellers.  Farmers and simple tradesmen away from urban areas hardly noticed their effects.  

My point in the prologue is that Clover instantly came up with modern terminology that didn't exist in their time.  Cleverness aside, one does not develop the precepts for a government out of nowhere in vacuum.  The ponies were simply throwing out terms that they should hardly have been aware of, such as anarchism as a form of government.  That is a VERY modern concept and does not at all fit into Equestrian history.

This alternate history, forming a republic, introducing political parties and the Princess as a candidate, is so different it should probably be an alternate universe.  


You didn't read the definition of an economic depression, did you? I even posted it for you, as a reference.

Next thing you'll be telling me is that their weren't economies prior to stock markets. Let me enlighten you:

Let's say I'm one of many poor farmers. I don't have any money. It's a gold-based economy.

All set? Good. Now, since I'm poor, it's not too much of a stretch that I don't have gold to buy things. I can;t barter because I grow barely enough to sustain myself. As a major consumer incapable of consuming, I don't contribute to an economy. Multiply this by your general population. Boom. Depression. No economic activity at all. No stock markets either.

Also, when you say "barely noticed their effects" you mean that they were so poor throughout multiple generations that they had come to accept the fact that economic depression was just another facet of their lives, yes? I'm pretty sure you can see this as being true.

Furthermore, stocks are a good as well: they represent vested interest in a company and its products. Since stocks are a good, they can't be the cause of depressions because depressions are based on the lack of the transference of goods.

Now let's get back to your point on Equestrian history.

You do know this is fanfiction, right? It is not necessarily accurate. Moreover the concept of the republic has been mentioned by some of the greatest minds of our time since the Pre-Christ era. You are familiar with the Republic of Athens, yes? Forming groups based on shared interests is also not a hard thing to conceive of. Ergo, forming parties is rather simplistic while in a republic.

You seem to be underestimating the intelligence of our ancestors. That is a grave misconception as well.

I'm not going to involve myself in the argument above, but I think that, while a politically-focused story is a breath of fresh air on this site, the execution and structuring on this one are a bit iffy. The second chapter jumps from what is basically a newly post-feudal society to something similar to a modern society; all the while, Celestia and Discord already exist. That's it? One party just happens to have the goddess of the sun as their leader, and the other happens to elect the only draconequus on the planet, and the one that turns out to be the spirit of chaos incarnate? They just are, no origin story? Discord even has a house?

While the canon characters seen so far don't have a whole lot in the way of developed personalities, I still felt as if the characterization was off at times. Personally, I don't think Discord would or could be as seemingly tame as he is now, and the original founders in their meeting were far more accommodating for each other - allowing them to form their new government in one chapter rather than having tension/conflict and extending it to two. I'm not sure if that's for the better, though, since it could easily have dragged on if you expanded that.

The economics bit felt weak as well, like it's just a recap of what went on or what is going on in the real world. Like I said about the time gap between the chapters, it sounds like Equestria is as technologically advanced as 1930s America or something.

How does this thing get on EQD and mine don't?

>>1434140  Not all farmers were poor.  It all depended on the aristocracy in charge.  Much of the poverty came about due to the selfish rulers stripping the resources from the populace.  

In less corrupt times of societies, farmers did quite well for themselves.  The difficulty is finding those times in the history books, because most focus only on the majority of the time when the governments were corrupt and oppressive.  The 'good' periods were few and far between.  But we can take a microcosm of small societies living in relative seclusion for hundreds of years in a purely agrarian society that sustained themselves indefinitely and never felt themselves 'poor'.  The modern notions of poverty in the Western world are rather extremely distorted when compared to the true depths of poverty endured by much of the rest of the world.  

I see plenty of severely obese people who are classed in the 'poor', and many of those are in their lot by their own failure to even make an attempt to better themselves.  

And frankly, the definition of what makes a 'depression' changes depending on what those in power want it to mean when it's politically expedient (and especially when they want to mask how badly they're doing).  I have my own criteria and those allow me to see through the political double-talk in very plain and simple terms.  

>>1437965  I had meant to make a note of Discord's inconsistent non-canon behavior.  If he is the same spirit of chaos from the show, why is he patiently planning anything?  Those are not the actions of the being we saw in "The Return of Harmony", who wasted no time in twisting things to his desires.  Indeed, why would he bother with the drudgery of politics when he could simply warp reality?  Playing the long game is not consistent with chaos.  Chaos has no patience for such things.  


Yay! political debates in a fanfiction about colorful ponies!

My day is complete:twilightsheepish:

>>1439609 I wouldn't necessarily put planning past him, because he seems like the kind of guy that would love to watch a well-laid plan unravel explosively (not his plan, but everything constructed around it) but the entertainment value for him would have to significantly outweigh the cost of drudgery and deception. Subtlety isn't his thing, but he is a trickster god and he doesn't operate entirely on a whim. He had his fun corrupting the Elements of Harmony in a rather drawn-out manner, after all.

However, I have faith in the author that things will be adequately explained later on. Perhaps the early Discord we've been presented with is not the same chaos-loving entity as the one we know, and he undergoes some kind of transformation. I have no idea, honestly.

>>Enamis Seriously?

>>1439886  This Discord has more in line with the devil in his deceptions and patience. There were a couple old Twilight Zone episodes which had the devil working his trickery and that's what this Discord acts like.  

Discord in the show may have tricks and manipulative ploys, but he's also VERY impatient when they don't work out instantly.  Remember his failure with Fluttershy.  Plus, there's no reason to play this game when the canon Discord is so powerful that Celestia and Luna together couldn't do a thing until they found the Elements of Harmony.  Not to mention, Celestia and Luna didn't even appear to the ponies until they saw how miserable he was making their lives with his madness and instability.

It's why I say this is much more an 'alternate universe' than canon.

>>1439713  Pseudo-political debate.  I'm actually toying with him.  What I really believe, I keep to myself.  It's never wise to show your hand before all the bets have been made.

I tell no one what really goes on in my head.  Only just enough to lord it over them as my predictions invariably prove accurate, and all the pieces move themselves into my hand.  

*sinks back into his chair with a sinister smile in the shadow of his black hood*  Everything is proceeding according to my designs.  :trixieshiftright:

Hmmm...... Procede............:trixieshiftright:

Alright, so while earlier arguments tended to hinge around Discord's characterization, I get the feeling that at this point, the character of "Disce Cordis" is distinct from the Discord we know. Maybe he has yet to break down into madness, or there is some very intense repression going on, but this guy isn't acting like Discord and it seems quite obvious that this is intentional.

Also, not sure if anyone else picked up on this (or if it was even a thing at all) but the way he pronounces Celestia's name with a hard C and three syllables sounds an awful lot like "Kallisti", which is what was engraved onto the Apple of Discord of Greek mythology. Neat reference there, if a little abstruse, assuming I'm not imagining it in the first place.

Intriguing...For what it's worth, I'm quite enjoying this story... Do go on...

I've noticed that quite a few aspects of the story appear to contravene established canon, so I feel that perhaps it would be best to add an "Alternate Universe" tag to this story, because that's what it's coming across as, and very strongly so. I'd also like to note that the dialogue between Luna and Discord was extremely awkward, if only because of the intense misuse of "thou". Archaic English isn't something you can just sprinkle into or selectively substitute with modern dialogue, because archaic English had its own specific rules of grammar and diction. "Do" becomes "dost", "have" becomes "hast", "you" becomes "thy" when used in direct address (like "thy foolish knave"), and so forth.  When you just replace "you" with "thou" without making an attempt to modify the surrounding sentence, it sounds bad.

This is one of the besst AU ever:pinkiehappy:

The intelligent diction of this story alone is managing to keep me here...the plot being good is quite frankly a bonus...

...and for the first time I have ever managed...*deep breath* :yay: First

...alright now I can burn in internet hell with a tad more happy...

I wonder how Celestia, Luna, and Discord will get there powers........

Viva la Ponylution!

Finally caught up. I really like the premise, but the way the characters talk is very strange. It reminds me a lot of "The Fountainhead" or other Ayn Rand Novels. Still, I am curious to see how you will tie this story with show cannon, and I love how you essentially switch Discord's and Celestia's roles, without deviating too much from their personalities on the show.

Me gusta:moustache:

Pony world-domination!

Disce is playing the long game, getting the opposition to act how he wants. Oh the chaos.

But how do they get there god powers?

Did Luna just give up?

A very tense chapter, with less of the navel gazing of the previous ones. Looks like this fic is finally starting to pay off.

By the way, you misused "who’s" at two points, where "whose" would have been correct.

Discord done gone and snapped...his plan into what it was all along...

Before this chapter I had completly forgoten they could do magic.

Did Discord always wanted to reach this point, or it was just after he became president?

:twilightblush:I have no idea what you guys are talking about.

:pinkiecrazy:LunaXDiscord shipping is what makes the world go 'round.

:unsuresweetie:"for Pete's sake? Is a uniquely human and Christian phrase that roughly translates to "If you want saint Peter to let you into heaven you should not have/ you shouldn't do/did that"

I supose Celestia is looking for the elements of harmony?

Discord finally LIVES!

That is some really glorious Latin. After all the scrambled word salads I've seen, it brings a tear to my eye.

Te laudo! :yay:

This is such a pleasure, watching people get drawn into the story as you publish more chapters. It's just a shame that such a majority won't appreciate this thing.


Maybe because your OC is an all red alicorn...

This is epicly epic and I have an appropriately epic cover for this, though I need to find a way to send it to you...


You could have written this exact story, with exception to the more magical bits, in a setting with perfectly ordinary humans. It would be no great stretch of the imagination to see it published as a short novel. And yet, I find myself glad that you chose to write this story in the MLP:FiM setting, for I would have been unlikely to discover it otherwise.

What we have here is not, in fact, a story about magical talking ponies. It is a story about an old, jaded politician being given a second chance to work towards an idealistic vision for the land he loves. Backed by the few strong allies he gathers, the charisma with which he gathers them, and perhaps above all else, his unshakable belief in rightness and justice, he stands poised to lead the country into a new golden age.

And we get to witness as everything that makes him a noble hero is stripped away and leaves nothing but a villain with no allies who still firmly believes he is in the right. This is one of the most beautiful fall-from-grace stories I have ever read. Stories this good remind me why I started writing in the first place. Thank you for creating this work of art.

Is this Disce last ganbit, or an actual explanation for his acts?


Either way, I'm suspecting it will turn Luna into Nightmare Moon.

Necronomicon, by Disce Cordis.:trollestia:

Realy good interpretation of Discord and the princesses.:twilightsmile:

You should do a prequel about the story behind the power of the elements.

Wow. You had a vision and carried it through. It was tough in some parts, but overall, excellent. Except, I can't figure out how to pronounce her "real name" with a hard C.

I don't think I have ever come across a Celestia that I have wanted to smack more than this version. An excellent story, and excellent points all around.

This is beautiful, and I would be ashamed if I did not leave a comment to express my thanks for this magnificent journey.

I had thought—perhaps around Discord's declaration of war, I can't precisely recall—that maybe Discord figured the Union was ticking bomb. That, Philomena, and Discord's nature (and the lack of an AU tag on this story) led me to those final words of the story; Discord believes a rebirth was in order, to be achieved through the chaos of war and the ashes of a dying nation.

I don't know if I was right. I don't know if this was your intention. But, damn, this here is a story my High School literature class could spend dissecting.

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