ASMR With Fluttershy

Fluttershy helps you get to sleep. But why exactly is she helping...

Show Era: Season 6

Image: by Lorc, with rights to the image alone at this link. Coloring added by me.

Chapters (1)

Comments ( 6 )

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Hillbe

Hillbe #1 · Jun 9th, 2023 · 1 · ·

Discord that's not funny!
What's not funny?
Discord taped hedge hogs on his eyes and ears
That's not so bad
prickly side in Darling
Get the points?

Golden Tassel

Golden Tassel #2 · Jun 9th, 2023 · 1 · ·

Wow. This is such a clever delight!

SparklingTwilight

SparklingTwilight #3 · Jun 10th, 2023 · · ·

11604773

Thank you!

11604763

Starswirl the Beardless

Starswirl the Beardless #4 · Jun 12th, 2023 · · ·

This was quite an interesting read. A little bit style over substance, but I think that's probably what you were going for. The artistic prose certainly holds up the story well enough. Well done!

Bicyclette

Bicyclette #5 · Sep 18th, 2023 · · ·

You're listening to Fluttershy's sweet voice: a calming voice, a repetitive voice, a soft voice, a lulling voice.

aww i feel better already!

She's reading ingredients off your cereal: chickpea, wheat, whole flour, brown sugar, maltodextrin, malted barley extract, sodium bicarbonate, molasses, salt, white sugar, vitamin D, zinc oxide, thiamin mononitrate, riboflavin, and folic acid.

dang i should really get something a bit more natural for breakfast

She's timid and too afraid to cause offense so she would never dare presume to marehandle another's property. Another's pets, maybe. But not their property.

so true, also love “marehandle”

That hole in your attic where Rainbow Dash burst through, followed by rain due to amateur patching. You complained about that last week. It has been restored--thank Celestia! Rather, thank Applejack. And Fluttershy was there--worried.

aww so that’s how the “you”’s life intersects with those of the Bearers!

Couldn't run the water because that might waken you. Several days now of no rest. Not since the party. Tossing and turning and eyes bloodshot and sore.

oof that is getting dire. Discord’s doing?

She lays down and snuggles against a cozy stuffed toy--not your favorite, you're sleeping with that one. But, your second favorite--the one with the askew googly eyes. A little pseudo-pet.

aww!

And flutters to the door. Unlatches a hitch on a snore.
Out she goes and shuts the egress.
Leaving you, sleeping, alone within.

well, that was an interesting one! the rhythms of the prose were a sort of ASMR itself, which was an interesting effect, and effective, if that is what you were going for. a very Fluttershy atmosphere, and the hinted-at origin of “you”’s insomnia also explaining why Fluttershy is so dedicated to this task comes together very nicely. (also as a comment on the toxicity of FlutterCord as can be seen in ”Make New Friends but Keep Discord”.) thank you for writing!

FanOfMostEverything

FanOfMostEverything #6 · Sep 19th, 2023 · · ·

Daring approach to tell a textual story that hinges so much on sound. I’m not sure if it really works, given the alleged perspective character is asleep for the vast majority of it. That defeats the whole purpose of a second-person story. If “you” aren’t cognizant of what’s happening, why tell the story through “your” slumbering eyes in the first place?

The content itself is fine, but the whole thing feels off, both because of the perspective issue and the unresolved tension introduced by Discord lingering over the proceedings. Sorry, but this just didn’t work for me.

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