they/them | 19 years old | a learning writer | Discord: PlutoMilo#7392 or @plutomilo
A griffon, hippogryph, earth pony, unicorn, and pegasus walk into a library to confront a dragon.
"What do you know about Nightmare Moon?
An overhaul of my old fic Twilight Sparkle the Dragon with more world building. This fic will deal with topics of fantasy racism, chronic pain, trauma, and other disabilities, along with LGBTQ+ issues.
Now being Beta-ed by the wonderful Lavender Veil!
Cover art by my friend Janus Draws!
Not abandoned, real life kicking my butt rn
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Rewrite... ok
Twilight the dragon... ok
Sporadic updates... I can"t help with it.
BUT Why you could finish your previous fic.
It was GOOD!
Good chapter!
Can't wait for more!
Great chapter
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Yeah I'm quite sad the original will forever remain unfinished.
This looks interesting. You've done a great job so far at establishing the character personalities, even in just the first chapter. Plus, their interactions, especially between Twilight and her son.
Look forward to seeing where this goes.
Tip if you want to have Luna and Discord the same as in the old fic, make sure to have the readers know that they are partially reformed also add the small incidents like trixie and the rest of fun slice of life episodes, bonus if you keep sombra as a parasite in Rarity's mind and... (if you reach that point) make him a spy in Grogar's legion of doom
Okay first- finish that damn first dragon Twilight Story!
as for the rest.
I wasn't expecting so many creatures in Ponyville, furthermore, Every future Twilight's friends are different creatures (well Pinkie is pegasus and young? I can't wait to see how it will impact the story). Twilight is a bit grumpy, it is normal for her or not?
Summary: I can't wait for the next chapter.
WHEN NEXT??!!??
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It's dead, let it rest. Pressuring the author to go back will do no good.
This is an interesting reboot. The differences between Canterlot and Ponyville are incredibly stark. I wonder who's the outlier: Canterlot's xenophobia or Ponyville's xenophilia. Also interesting to see that Twilight is somewhat "neutered" when it comes to magic, what with her inability to cast any kind of spell requiring greater amounts of magic. I'm looking forward to how she will overcome what lies in the future.
I especially like the interactions between Twilight and Spike. Very relatable.
Ah, I kinda though Mac was upset because Twilight was talkin' slow to him. Fluttershy confirmed it, I see.
Hmm, Twilight didn't seem all that shocked that the library was a literal tree though. It's easy to look over since we're all so used to it.
I'll admit, I'm very interested in this. There aren't very many stories with good Twi/Spike mom/son interactions as the focal point, and have interesting side plots and worldbuilding to boot! Hope you continue this!
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grumble, grumble... I'm just unhappy with unfinished stories.
I agree with you this is a VERY interesting story.
Why isn't there a dark tag?
Wow, Shining Armor is harsh here. Good cliff-hangar, though. Heh, even Nightmare Moon is surprised to see a dragon.
Well hello there Luna
Why isn't there a Mane Six tag?
It's going to be interesting to see how Twilight will plan to take on an alicorn if simple proximity to their lit horns is enough to make her unwell.
Wow has Celestia let her ego get to her head. To the point I think she needs a Rainbow to the face just as much as NMM. Really, calling Twilight weak for wanting to take care of Spike after accidentally switching their species on Spike's birth. I should read the old version and see if Celestia and Twilight's family were less of asshats in that one. Good story but it's made me very angry and want both Canterlot and NMM to burn.
Another intense chapter! I must admit, I'm finding this story quite addictive so far.
Celestia sure is far more cold and calculating here than in the series. Hmm, I wonder, since we didn't get to see it, what the reaction of Velvet and Night Light were? Did they run away? Did they try to stop Spike from rushing forward? Did they abandon him? Or both? Did Night Lihght try to save him while Velvet did the opposite? Or did they both try and stop him, but Spike squirmed away from them?
When all is finally said and done and Twilight reunites with her son and he tells her what happened, Velvet and Night Light's reaction during Nightmare Moon's introduction may very well determine whether or not Twilight will ever let them see Spike again.
Great story ! Added to read list. Really looking forward to reading more.
This is going to throw a teeny-tiny wrench into Celestia's plans, for sure.
And, because I cannot believe no-one mentioned it in the chapter before (including me!): Re-reading that chapter just once again highlighted this Celestia's haughtiness, egocentrism and plain corruptness when she not only treated Spike like an object, but plainly stated that no student could ever surpass their teacher, i.e. her. What an asinine, backwards-thinking stance.
Quite the hypocrite considering she just did the same thing by kidnapping Spike from his mom to use as a bargaining chip.
Heh, reminiscent of when Rarity used Magnet's scale to cut off her mane in the show's Nightmare Moon arc.
Hmm, come to think of it, without facing the original trials that the show characters did, how do they prove themselves worthy of the Elements? I guess from the time Twilight spent with them in Ponyville and they displayed the attributes to her there?
More intrigue and character development in this chapter! Can't wait for maore!
If it is meant to play a bigger role in the future, mentioning Dream-Shining's request to remind him of their relationship might be something to add to the synopsis at the end.
Also, Celestia really needs to get over her bias against dragons. I guess that is what happens when you have someone ageless steep in her prejudices for a long time while in a position where nobody can effectively tell her "No, bad princess!"
Heavy magic causes seziures? Nice world building.
Another interesting chapter, from multiple viewpoints. Can't wait for more!
Also, I would be interested in the position of beta reader, but, honestly, your story so far has been very readable. A mite few grammar mistakes here-and-there, but nothing that detaches from the story as a whole, or even a chapter.
This is better then canon.
Something tells me Luna will pop in nigmare mode more often now just because Tia is a moron that gets on everyone's nerves. Oh and those times everyone will aprove of her bringing night eternal up if you her sister is tought a lesson
Pretty interesting that NMM is willing to let day return so comparatively easily. And also nice to see that somewhere deep inside, Velvet still cares.
I totally thought Spike was going to be the element of magic!
Huh, Velvet is strict with Spike, but more out of knowledge of the pressure he'll face as future head of the house than any actual malice or feelings he's inferior. Though... with Twilight as the scion, and dragons living for millennia, she'll basically be head of the house long after Spike and all others have perished...unless Spike's dragon lifespan was somehow transferred to his pony body.
The twists just keep coming along, don't they? You'd think with over a thousand years to plan, Nightmare Moon would be alittle more strategic, but she seems to be making it up as she goes along? Maybe thoughts work differently when you're trapped on the moon? Or maybe after a thousand years, your thoughts just become incoherent anyway, especially when you're suddenly faced with a new reality once again, in a time totally unfamiliar to you.
Why don’t you reply to comments on your stories? Do you not know how to?
A good chapter, and nice to see more character depth and interactions/intrigue with House Sparkle. The moods and whims of Celestia and Luna seem to change on dime, though.
First Luna wants Spike as her guard captain, then she loses her daughter, goes mad, seemingly forgets her daughter, takes Twilight in exchange for Spike, invades Twilight's dreams, acts motherly to Twilight, then goes mad for seemingly no reason, then controls Twilight like a doll and leaves herself alone again.
I guess being stuck in the moon for a thousand years really did a number on her sanity.
Celestia seems to be all over the place; both cunning but also apathetic. Wanting to give her sister some leeway, but not indicating to Luna that's what she's doing.
Wasn't Shining supposed to secure Canterlot? Or is he still preparing to go?
You changed the cover image again; they all look nice, this one included.
Twilight personality is very vexing as I would imagine a dragon having much MUCH stronger parental instincts
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Thanks for the spoilers
This seems good. I hope Twilight introduce Madam Guillotine to Canterlot
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Hey it's the old version this already vired so off the course I don't think they will even get discord out of stone in the first place
Well, congratulations Canterlot, you have won a visit of a firing squad for being racist supremacist bigots
This was amazing!
Rather confusing, tbh. Oh, I get it and all, but remember, this story is so slow in development and publishing, that I often have to go back and reread earlier chapters to make sense of any current chapter. I have an observation, however, that it seems that both AJ and Rd's Element terms are reversed, which is illogical at best. Shouldn't RD be Loyalty, AJ be Honesty? And the jump from NMM's POV to the other third-person POV takes one's views of the narrative so jarringly, it leaves a bad taste in one's mouth.
Story's cool, but presentation could be better.
The siege scenes were cool! And I really liked how each element was explained at the end.
Was that really Nova, or was it a changeling disguised as Nova?
Just got caught up. Great update. Looking forward to the next chapter.
Immediate favourite. I adored the first book and am so excited to see what you do with this rewrite.
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Swapping AJ’s and RD’s elements is actually a pretty common trope in the fandom.
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At the time I wrote my comment, I was still relatively new to the fandom then, so apologies if I misunderstood. Weird tropes are part of the fun here, and I am still getting up to speed with them.
I am still trying to grasp the notion of gnederbending via Rule 63, after all...
(Never was much into Anime tropes)