- Member Since 15th Dec, 2012
- offline last seen 10 hours ago
Freewing Alchemist P
Hard worikng Writer. Likes to read stories and Impove his skills. Has a strange sences of humor, don't hold it against me.
Freewing Alchemist P
Joined 15th Dec, 2012 ·
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great wind up the pay off was kind of a let down
11104470 Thank you
Kinda feels like it ends too quickly, theres not much build up, she just kinda snaps into it
I’d work to help the pacing as it just feels a little too short
11105146 OK, what do you suggest?
I am open to suggestion. I can admit I messed up but I got stuck.
the story is nice but... do you think this story deserves to be tagged dark if the "victim" follows willingly to the hypnosis?
11105246 thanks, I'm just covering my bases
you should really invest in a proofreader. I had to stop because all of the bad spelling, punctuation, and grammar.
11106568 Thank you
Pretty good first chapter, enjoyed it quite a bit!
11108232 Why, Thank you.
Glad to hear it.
More please.
This is a very unique story, and one I'd be willing to follow if it continues into a series.