• Member Since 16th Jun, 2015
  • offline last seen Saturday

Snow Quill


Just a bat, sometimes writes, sometimes draws

T

After the Wonderbolts, after the Washouts, Lightning Dust seeks a new life. With all her worldly possessions in a saddlebag and a hoof full of bits, she hops on the train to anywhere,

At the end of the line, she finds a home, a job, and a wonderful mare.

But life still isn’t without it’s storms.

Written as a birthday gift for the amazing Red Parade as an unofficial prequel to his story never forever

Cover art by myself.

(If you are an author looking for cover art, send me a PM!)

Chapters (4)
Comments ( 9 )

Oh this was just lovely. I didn't much care for Lightning Dust, but this had the right mood to get me to care. Good job!

i absolutely loved this story. i'd love to see a sequel where Star invites her parents to a wonderbolts show she is performing in and Dust reunites with RD and Spitfire and the other bolts

10644684
I’m glad to hear you liked the story! I pretty much felt the same about Lightning Dust until reading Red Parade’s stories, he has this amazing ability to make you care about lesser known/background ponies. If you liked this, I definitely recommend checking out his stuff.

10644691
It’s unlikely this will be getting that sort of sequel, as this was written as an unofficial prequel to one of my friends stories where that pretty much happens lol. I am glad you liked it though. If you want more amazing Lightning Dust and Fiddlesticks, definitely check out Red Parade and KrazyTheFox (who’s stories are in the ‘similar’ tab)

The tiny interjections from Lightning's psyche are really well done here. The hard part I've often found with taking characters like Lightning in a new direction is how to write their new personality without losing what's in their old one and you do it excellently here. Best Pone/Fiddlesticks is also great here, and we really get the sense that she knows Lightning so well that she can reel her back in like this, keeping her grounded and on earth. Fantastic stuff.

The pacing trick you used during the storm to lead right into the next scene is terrific and fits in very well. The way you were able to blend two significant parts into each other so well speaks volumes as to how good this is, as you pull it off seamlessly and naturally, all while staying in the POV character's head. Like, that's just super impressive! And also the final segment is just so fitting. One might expect her to be angry but I could argue the opposite here: I think the defeat, the numbness, the emptiness she feels is just so rich and real. Fantastic stuff again.

So much good stuff here! The snapshots into their lives as they learn to live, cope and move on are so well done and rich here. I love the new sections you added since the last time I read this, and it does wonders to boost the relationship they have and the love that they feel. It's very, very well done. Everything here is just as emotional and impactful as it needs to be and it's easy for me to cheer these two on throughout their struggles. The insecurity, the anxiety, the reassurance... everything between these two is fantastic and truly well thought-out!

I mentioned it before but you once again do an excellent job blending a new take on Lightning Dust with her canon self. The hot-headed, aggressive nature of her clearly hasn't gone away but you address that and show how it comes into play, even after all these years. And that ending is just as real and as impactful as the rest of the story, and honestly I'm really happy for Lightning now. Because she's right, she was finally able to make something she's proud of, even after everything she's lost.

This is again an excellent story, and a very worthy prequel to never forever. You handle your own concepts and canons on these two very well and have created a lovely, cozy, dramatic story that is more than definitely memorable. Thank you so much for this!

10644847
I’m really glad you enjoyed this Red, it was a blast to write and I am really grateful you gave me permission to do this. I wouldn’t have been able to pull this off without your awesome editing and fiddledust stories for inspiration, so thank you

This was very well written and a very touching story. I really enjoyed this! :twilightsmile:

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