EDIT: Featured 09/23/2020
Honestly one of the few good things to happen to me in 2020.
Twilight Sparkle was just your average ordinary girl. She was incredibly smart, had dreams of being an engineer, and had no friends at her school since they all just labeled her as a nerd to be ignored. And she had no aspirations to be anything more than that.
However, during a summer tour of DisCorp, she gets bitten by a genetically modified spider and was given powers beyond her wildest dreams.
But as we all know "With Great Power, There Must Also Come Great Responsibility."
And after a tragedy makes her see this, she realizes that the city of Manehattan needs hope.
It needs a hero.
It needs Spider-Girl.
The First Story In The NEW Equestria Girls Marvel Universe!
-Starts in June BEFORE the first Equestria Girls Movie.
....... I want to jump into this.... I want to like this but........ the last story's still fresh on me and......... I'll keep it as a listed story.... I'm sorry man.
10445544
It's cool, dude. Take your time.
Who knows, you might actually end up liking this more than the original.
10445547
I dunno...... smells like some MCU bashin' is comin' to this story.....
Nah I'm pickin'. You're probably right that I may like this more then the original. I'm just trying ta joke a bit is all.
10445552
Like I said, it's cool dude.
This is a good start. I really like this. I'm surprised its more like the first Amazing Spidey movie, but still.
I am curious, will the costume go the Spider-Gwen route? I hope it does.
This is an awesome start to the story! I can't wait to see where this goes. I do have a couple questions I want to ask, though, but if the answers would reveal spoilers, don't feel the need to answer them. I will understand. So, I guess I will start...
1. Since the story is gonna be like the Sam Raimi and Marc Webb movies, will there be a limited rogues gallery for Spider-Girl to face, or can we expect an extensive roster? I'm asking because on top of Discord potentially becoming the Green Goblin, I totally see that Doctor Scales is this world's counterpart of Curt Connors/Lizard.
2. Are Twilight's friends gonna be involved in some way?
And just being nit-picky, I noticed in the sentence -
Shoulder is missing the er at the end. Otherwise, this story is awesome, and I can't wait to see where this goes!
So which one's gonna get shot by the burglar: Cadence, or Shining Armor?
I wonder how tragedy will strike the sparkle family?
Will it be her father or her brother?
Seriously
so Ms Samantha Scales is obviously Lizard, Discord's is Oscorp/the Goblin? Or Maybe Doc Ock . And shoot are you going to kill Cadence or Shining Armor off? Sunset could be the black cat of the group [minus the thief part] lmao
Well on the plus side with this setup you can totally do the blacksuit in place of Midnight Sparkle.
Okay, I think I can give this story a chance. I am a bit disappointed that Flash won't be a protagonist in this one just because SciFlashlight stories with him as the main character aren't very common, but I'll wait to see how things play out before I make any judgments. Also, I see you have made a Doc Connors stand-in, which I am fine with. By the way, will Cinch still be a supervillain in this story? Also, will this story also have mutants? That small aspect really peaked my interest in your last story, so I may be a little sad if that part also ends up getting scrapped, not too sad but still sad. One last thing, regarding Flash's role in the story, how major are we talking about here? Are we talking second half of a battle couple major, mission control major, or guy who repeatedly needs to be rescued major? Please don't let it be the last one because that would be a major step back and a huge disservice to his character.
The story is great so far. I can't wait to see more.
P.S. Just thought of something, you mentioned that Spider-Girl is the first superhero to make her appearance in this universe. Are you implying other superheroes (and possibly SHIELD) will start showing up in this universe?
I am SERIOUSLY miffed that you swapped Flash for Twilight to be the spider hero here, make no mistake. It's no often that I come across stories that have him as a main character, especially doing him right as a person. Poor guy gets bashed SO MUCH ... *shudders*...
But considering how good that story was, I give this one a shot.
But there is one issue I got a problem with here: how the HAY has S.H.I.E.L.D. not been formed yet?! In all the different Marvel universes I've seen, they've been around for YEARS. Heck, in the MCU, they were formed right after WWII. Superheroes or not, S.H.I.E.L.D. has a purpose, so I picture them being mostly in the shadows until Iron Man, Thor, and the other Avengers start surfacing.
Even though I knew this was coming, it still feels weird not having Flash as the main character.
Although I am admittedly a little sad Flash isn’t still Spider-Man here, I can easily forgive it since Twilight is basically my favorite character anyway. This is going to be awesome.
I like the pun you make with Discord here. It isn’t often you see someone like him working for someone else, but that does help set up his boss as a legitimate threat.
I can’t quite put my finger on it, but there is something about Doctor Samantha Scales that reminds me of The Lizard. Guess I’ll just need to wait and see.
shoulder
Well, I have to say, so far, the story is off to a pretty promising start. And, yeah, Sci-Twi DOES make much more sense as the Peter Parker Expy than Flash does. As you pointed out, she's a lot better at coming up with impressive gadgets on a limited budget. And, yeah, it's pretty obvious that Human Discord is going to be the Norman Osborn/Green Goblin Expy (though probably with an equal mix of the Goblin powers and toned down versions of SOME of his Equestrian counterpart's abilities [limited but respectable level superhuman strength and durability like many versions of the Goblin plus the abilities to teleport himself a few miles, levitate multiple tons {though nothing larger than a bus} and create certain weapons {though nothing larger than a bazooka} merely by thought {assuming he knows ALL of the inner workings of what he is trying to create}] so that he has enough power to make Spider-Girl's eventual victory over him look more heroic WITHOUT being such a threat as to REQUIRE the forming of the Avengers to handle) and Doctor Samantha Scales is definitely going to be in the role of Curt Connors/the Lizard. Plus, well, It's insultingly obvious that Cinch is basically going to be essentially, a much thinner female Kingpin.
But, yeah, this look at Twilight's life before the Spider-bite is really great and I have a feeling that Shining, most likely one of the very few honest cops in the city (as MOST versions of Human Shining tend to be police officers), is going to get shot and killed in the line of duty by the crook Sci-Twi fails to stop when she has the chance.
As for Flash, I AM wondering what plans you have for him other than, obviously, being the Composite Character for Gwen and MJ (though, hopefully, better equipped to take care of himself than either of them), but that's for later chapters.
As this is BEFORE the FIRST Equestria Girls film, I am going to guess that Sunset Shimmer is going to be one of the villains (like an equal mix of Flash Thompson [school bully] and Otto Octavius [power-mad genius], though it's possible she could become the Expy for Eddie Brock/Venom [starts out as a villain and gains super-powers, but eventually semi-reforms and becomes a brutal Anti-Hero who STILL has super-powers]). Of course, it's ALSO possible that I am overthinking it and my guesses concerning Sunset are completely wrong). And either Trixie or Jack Pot are almost definitely going to be Mysterio (much closer to the version from the comics than to the version from "Far From Home"). The Dazzlings are ALSO going to be obvious villains for later on (being slightly akin to the obscure 1970s comic book villain the Hypno-Hustler, though obviously MUCH more competent and powerful). And I could EASILY see Chrysalis's human counterpart being the Expy for the Chameleon, Human Wind Rider basically becoming the Expy for Adrian Toomes/the Vulture and Human Lightning Dust becoming the Expy for Maxwell Dillon/Electro (far closer to the version from the comics than the Marc Webb version). And, again, I fully acknowledge that it is not only possible, but very likely, that I am over-thinking this.
But, anyway, whether my guesses are right or (MUCH more likely) wrong, I will still be gladly looking forward to much more of this.
this will be fun. i can jest see it.
10445566
Thank you.
Honestly I feel the Marc Webb Amazing Spider-Man movies are a little overhated. I actually like both of them and consider them to be my 2nd and 3rd favorite Spider-Man films. The first of course being Into The Spider-Verse.
Same basic design, but the colors are different to match the spider that bit Twilight. Take Spider-Gwen's costume, and replace the white with a royal purple, the black with a very dark midnight blue. The magenta patches on her arms and in her hood are instead black, and instead of those few patches her costume actually has silver web designs all over the royal purple parts. Finishing it all is a white spider emblem
And sadly you're just gonna have to take my word for it and imagine it, since I haven't found any pictures close enough to use as a cover art, and my artistic abilities start and end at stick figures.
That and the only Spider-Twi fan art I've managed to find on Deviantart are variations of... this. And I will never use this costume because:
1) This is arguably the laziest superhero costume I've ever seen. At least Ben Reilly's original Scarlet Spider costume had the cool sleeveless blue hoodie. This doesn't even have that going for it. It's just a one-piece full body spandex suit with a white spider emblem. LA-ZY.
2) Why is her hair sticking out of it? Characters like Kamala Khan and Cyclops can get away with it, since their hair colors are fairly common. Twilight Sparkle has anime hair that even in the world of Equestria Girls is very unique and noticeable. You put Twilight as a civilian in a police lineup with her hair in a ponytail, your secret identity is shot. Not even Mary Jane Watson's hair sticks out this much (primarily because redheads are actually more common in real life than you think.)
3) Can someone please tell me why in the name of Faust the costume is BUBBLEGUM PINK?! There are many colors that I can associate with Twilight Sparkle, primarily lavender or various shades of purple or a very dark blue (like midnight blue.) Pink, not so much. Pink is frankly a color I associate with Pinkie Pie or maybe Fluttershy. Not Twilight Sparkle in ANY universe.
10445576
1. There's going to be plenty of villains for her to throw down against. Trust me.
2. You'll have to wait to find out.
10445587
That's not quite how it's going to go.
And as for who gets the bullet, I will not spoil that one. Sorry.
10445631
It's not going to be her father, for reasons that will be explained in the next couple of chapters.
As for how it happens, that I will not spoil. Patience.
10445626
Yes, seriously.
10445637
No comment on what I plan to do with the symbiote. And even then, that's not going to be until the second book. So that's far out of my mind.
10445724
Thank you. Don't worry, he'll have time to shine in the spotlight.
Yup. And she's going to be just as much of a bitch.
I'll actually be touching on that with Spike in the next chapter.
Don't worry, I would never plan on making Flash Sentry the "dude" in distress. As for how major his role will be? I can't really elaborate without getting into MAJOR SPOILER TERRITORY! But rest assured, he will have a big part to play.
Yes, and not just in the Equestria Girls universe.
10445772
I should probably have clarified that. But it was almost midnight and I was pushing to get it out. Sorry.
When I said S.H.I.E.L.D. hadn't been formed yet, I meant that they haven't really been established yet in the public. They're around, they're just mostly sticking to the shadows. Enough to the point that they probably won't be relevant to the story until after this first story is over. Sorry for the confusion.
10445825
Well, he'll still be A main character. And he'll definitely have several chances to shine.
10445877
It's partly a reference to the 90s Amazing Spider-Man Cartoon, as well as the Spectacular Spider-Man. In both cases Norman Osborn was working for crime bosses, Wilson Fisk/Kingpin in the 90s (admittedly under duress, but still) and Tombstone in Spectacular. And considering the guy is literally called The Storm King, you can guess he's either one of these guys or both of them.
10445951
Glad to have you on board, man.
And since I don't want to spoil it, some of your guesses are actually pretty close. But I won't spoil which ones.
Well okay, I will admit you're very close on the Mysterio one. Because after all, who better to play the most grandiose and over the top of Spider-Man's rogues gallery, than The Great and Powerful TRIXIE!
10446314
Thank you.
10446380
i hope more chapters will come.
10446378
Nice. I like the costume.
10446418
They will.
10446427
Thank you.
Seeing as how the new story has launched, I’m going to toss in my two cents, if I may.
I, for one, welcome the changes Equestrian Defender has made. Making Twilight the Spider-Person makes sense, as it fits with the source material of Spider-man being an intelligent superhero without making Twilight seem drastically out of character in terms of her own origins. I also approve of the idea of a female lead hero in general, so that’s a plus.
You also did a great job with the early world building, with the intro of potential major characters, i.e. Discord, Dr. Scales, the Storm King, the chatroom person who I assume is Tempest Shadow. I can tell that you have put a lot of work into making sure this story becomes a hit, which is usually a good sign. And for that, I give you my like, a favorite, and a follow.
I look forward to the next chapter, Defender. I’ll be expecting great things from you.
p.s. Does she have AS ?
Why not Ghost spider? That's WAY cooler than Spider girl.
10446459
nice. can't wait to see them.
10446488
Thank you. And I only hope I can meet those expectations.
10446489
I didn't really plan on it. But honestly in canon some of her actions (Both Pony Twilight's and Human Twilight's) did seem to indicate they had some form of AS, so I guess it's up to Reader Interpretation.
10446520
Because the costume I envisioned for her does not have any white at all, so the ghost thing wouldn't make sense.
That being said I may or may not use that idea sometime in the future.
10446378
Thanks VERY much for the clarifications.
10446520
To be fair, that would probably be better saved for the Miles Morales Expy (since one of Miles's powers is blending in to backgrounds to the point of near-invisibility and invisibility is a power VERY commonly associated with ghosts).
10446601
You're welcome.
10446378
I LOVED Into the Spider-Verse, and while the Marc Webb movies aren’t my top favorites, I will agree that they are grossly underrated.
I look forward to seeing the direction you’re going with Flash. (Side note, I find it kind of funny how so many people forget that Mary Jane Watson was originally nothing close to a damsel in distress and mainly see her as one just based on the Raimi film series.)
One more thing, I like the idea of the Storm King serving the role of Kingpin in this series, partly because they’ve both been played by the same guy.
10446667
Amen, pal. Amen.
Yeah, that's one of the reasons she wasn't really one of my favorite characters in the Sam Raimi films. That and the romantic chemistry she had with Peter wasn't great, she was basically just a tool in the films save for a few moments, and honestly she was just boring.
And don't worry, Flash isn't going to end up as the "Dude" in distress. That's the one thing I will never do to any character.
Well he's one of the only two canon villains who have KING in their name, and I already have plans for King Sombra.
I'm not going to lie. I'm unhappy with the swap. But for the time being, I will swallow my own feelings and withhold judgement until later.
As Godslittleprincess said, the original was one of the only fanfics where Flash was the focus. When he wasn't just the butt of everyone's jokes and insults. I really don't understand why people give him crap after everything that these characters have put him through.
No joke, terrible writing. I mean, they made him a doormat. Sunset was a terrible girlfriend, apparently, and she tried to give him advice after pony Twilight up and left up without saying goodbye. She said it was tough love he just had to get over her. That's not how feelings work!
In essence, what I mean is, he deserves much better. But I will read this in the hopes that you can deliver that.
I try not to think about the other opinions whether people talk about flash sentry the rocking pretty boy or timber spruce the brodude lifeguard
I honestly think both are pretty boring
Whatever people think is there business and I respect their decisions
But I am not thinking about pairings, Twilight is young and she should enjoy her youth before settling down
10446799
Don't worry. Flash will have plenty of time in the limelight, and will grow into his own character and hero.
And dude, I completely agree with you on how horrible the writing he got was. And he's not the only example. I actually have a list of characters who Hasbro shafted in the story and character development department, including:
And that's just the ones I could list off the top of my head.
10446814
Outta curiosity, you know Robbie Reyes?
10446964
One of my favorite Ghost Riders. Why?
As a thought
Since Twilight is female version of spiderman
I wonder if there could be a male versions of black cat
silver sable
Silk
Betty brant
Gwen stacy
Mj
And Liz Allen
10446378
what? when did i say Night light?
10446994
Just putting in an idea....
10447158
Whoops. I was responding to another guy's comment and I got it messed up. Sorry!
TURN OFF THE MATURE SETTING AND LOOK AT FEATURED!
Dude, all your stories are unfinnished, I am not sure if I should start reading this rewrite, will it be unfinnishd too, your track record makes me doubt.
Hmmm...well, this is a surprise.
Not to speak ill of your previous story, but I kinda like this version better...though maybe that's just me not really being a fan of Flash Sentry, as well as my previous statement that he didn't really have enough of a personality to make him feel much different than just Peter Parker with a name change.
Discord as Norman Osborn was an interesting choice, looking forward to see where you're going with that, and...the Storm King is Kingpin, that's...extremely similar to my own story. Not to sound petty, but you might want to mention somewhere that I did come up with that idea first.
And I'm guessing Savannah is an OC stand-in for Doc Connors/the Lizard...especially given that one scene with her was nearly identical to a scene from the first Amazing Spider-Man movie.
However...
As an autistic person, this statement kinda offends me...though I'm also not sure if we as an audience are supposed to agree with her or not.
10447580
I understand. I was only fairly recently diagnosed with it. A lot of people, especially neurotypical people, see the bad side of having autism and decide that we'd be better off without it, but without it, we wouldn't be as good at the stuff we're good at. Then again, we don't have it so bad that we can't talk or go places. At the same time, people have found ways for even severely autistic people to contribute to society and live fuller lives.
10447462
I noticed. Thank you.
10447482
That's up to you, pal. I always do my best to finish my stories, especially ones based off of stuff that I like like Marvel Comics, Kingdom Hearts, Power Rangers, and yes My Little Pony. It's just that with my busy schedule, mental issues, chronic cases of writer's block, I have a hard time getting chapters out in a timely manner. That and the constant plot bunnies running in my head has me constantly thinking up new story ideas.
But rest assured, I plan to see this story out to the end.
10447580
Thank you. That's actually the whole reason I started this reboot. Sci-Twi is just so much closer to a Peter Parker-type character that it made more sense to use her.
Honestly considering how he's the Spirit of Disharmony and Chaos, it only made sense to me. Plus considering this takes place in Equestria Girls, Luna's not exactly in a position to become a Green Goblin Expy since she's not the CEO of a MegaCorporation like Oscorp. Plus I already have my own plans for her in the future, just you wait.
Crap, I totally forgot you were planning on doing that. I'll be sure to put it in the comments section in my next chapter. Sorry.
Actually you mean Samantha, and yes. Though the prosthetic arm is from the Spectacular Spider-Man cartoon, which I still hold as the greatest Spider-Man cartoon ever.
No, it's more because one of Dr. Connor's lines in The Amazing Spider-Man was that he wanted to create, and I quote
. We're mostly led to believe that he's talking about physical weaknesses, like blindness, deafness, Polio or Parkinson's (which Connors' himself has.)
But here's the thing, weaknesses can also fall into the mental category. Alzheimer's, Bipolar Disorder, Dementia, Psychosis, Schizophrenia and yes, Autism.
So it's not outside the realm of possibility that after solving everyone's "physical weaknesses" Dr. Connors would try to work on solving everyone's "mental weaknesses" if he did deem them weaknesses.
Personally, I don't deem Autism a weakness. If anything for me it's a strength. But as we'll eventually see, Samantha Scales is a bit of a perfectionist. And not in a good way.
10447784
Like I just posted, it was never my intention to offend people, especially since I myself have Autism.
It's mostly to play into Dr. Samantha Scales's character, who's a bit of a perfectionist. And not in a good way.
10447801
I did consider him for the role as well, mostly because at the time he was really the only mlp villain with the Goblin's twisted sense of humour, however I ultimately decided not to since he didn't seem like the guy to attack someone directly the way the Goblin does, and also because of the story potentials of using Luna/Nightmare Moon in a Jekyl and Hyde manner.
However, if I started my story now or rebooted it like you're currently doing, then I'm pretty sure I would have given the Storm King that role instead. (the Movie hadn't come out when I first started writing Spider-Dash.)
Apology accepted. Though now I'm curious how different/similar the two versions will end up being.
For instance, in my version, no one actually calls him the Storm King, because his real name is Rex Storm (see what I did there?), and is referred to simply as Kingpin when it comes to his alias. So that's one thing I can see right away will be quite different.
And now I feel like I might be needing reading glasses. I guess I thought everyone would have pony-ish names instead of common names and my brain filled in the gaps.
Agreed.
And yeah, I kinda I kinda got the vibe that she's not exactly meant to be in the right with her opinions. After all, I'm kinda sensing villain vibes off of her. Besides, fictional characters don't always have to be politically correct or have beliefs that line up with the author's. Heck, I like writing (and also playing whenever a situation arises) sociopaths so much that some people think its weird that I'm a rather kind and respectful person in real life.
10447867
I can believe it. Hell, I do the same thing sometimes.