It feels a touch... forced.

In particular, the part about Celestia having her horn removed and being forced into retirement, which in turn means throwing Twilight in the deep end.

10361451
Ok, that part actually is forced, since I had already formulated an end in the original story and had to somehow reach that same end with this one...

10361453
Okay, but wouldn't it be easier to just have her injure her horn, and have to let Luna take control of the sun while she recovers? It would still be a significant shock to act as a reason to retire and also let her ease Twilight into the role, not to mention you can have Alex stay in Ponyville a touch longer and come to his conclusion on staying away from them for their own good.

Plus, it leaves you open to do a third, more lighthearted, book in this series later, if you choose to, with Alex forming emotional, and possibly physical, connections with the rest of the Mane Six, making his decision to stay away more impactful.

10361453
Not to mention that the first fic's epilogue never specifies how far in the future it gets set.

10361484
that certainly would've been possible, however, there was another issue: like I mentioned sometime ago, this whole fic was running on a time limit and said time limit has been hit today

What I'd like to see, is a time free third part. Maybe Applepunch gets a hankering for some gems one day and asks her mother why, which leads down a rabbit hole of funny shenaniganery that ends with AP accidentally poking Navi?

10368974
I'll think about it, once I'm out of basic training. For now, all of my projects are halted anyways. Definitely sounds like something I could build on, though.

Good story

You know, I think this story is very misleading, I read the whole thing front to back and I didn't get any of the homo I was promised

11597485
Ha haaaa, that joke could've come from a german.