Okay, I... don't like this. Like, at all.

I know Sparklecest is your bread and butter, but this? This is just way too "Paddle faster, I hear banjos" for me. Everyone is cheating, everyone is getting cucked, everyone is their own grandparent, and their entire family dynamic now has this underlying tension of mistrust and quiet anger that kills it all for me. Just reading this I get the feeling that everyone in the Sparkle household only "tolerates" the others, with maybe a bit more fondness than you would see on an episode of COPs. And while I usually giggle at the "Shining Armor Is A Goddamn Moron" trope, this goes to the point of him bordering on emotionally stunted and borderline retarded.

So, yeah. Love ya like a brother, that's gonna be a big no from me, dawg.

i luv u bb nu hayt meh

"Shining, you're my son. And I am obligated to love you. But sometimes to are a goddamn moron."

I friggin’ love this line.

Certainly something new, but I... suppose I appreciate Fullyry heart trying her best to part of the family's regularities.

10294822

Yeah, it was a bit… a bit like The Force Awakens. All the interesting parts were done for you before the story started.

And he also probably didn't get a divorce because the courts are most likely the same as our world where even if the mother is a meth addicted crack smoking prostitute she'd still be given full custody of the children, not mention she'd also be given the family home as well as all of Night's bits and possessions.

10307540
... I mean, that was kind of part of the subtext. But damn...
media2.giphy.com/media/mxKdIoeskbqE/giphy.gif

Daaamn... That one interessting familie tree

"While Dad and Twilie..?"

Whaaat the hay!!!!

"Hey, I'm not that old. I'm only fifty four,"

Wait, only 54? How does that add up?

10630954
Night Light was 18 when he had Shining who was 18 when he had Flurry, who is now 18.
18 x 3 = 54

10630954
In human world grands pregnant at 17 and mom pregnant at 17 makes them only 34 then the grandbaby being 16+ puts them at 50 and up.

Why not? I'll give this a look.

It was Friday afternoon. Twilight Velvet trotted frantically through her Canterlot home. "There are some prepared meals in the fridge," she said as she gathered up the last of her travel things. "I'll be back Sunday afternoon," she said.

This would look better with the second instance of "she said" removed. It's a redundant use of tagging.

"Oh, hey guys!" Velvet greeted.

"Hey Mom," Shining greeted

Maybe "returned the salutation" or just something other than using 'greeted' twice? You're usually a very strong alliteration author and I'm wondering if this early part couldn't have used another editing pass.

Apparently things have been getting uppity between the Abyssinian and the Diamond Dog nations again.

You have the DDs and Abyssianians bordering each other? Interesting. I have them on totally different continents in my headcanon.

"Who wants cookies?" Velvet asked.

Flurry heart rolled her eyes. "I'm not a little filly."

"So you're saying you don't want cookies?" Velvet asked.

"... No. I'm not saying that."

I'm a grown mare who wants cookie NAO!

"Don't spoil my daughter!" Cadance said.

"Cadie, I'm done being a parent,"

Read this as "I'm done being a pervert" on my first scan. No, I don't think you are, Nighty.

Shining Armor could not have turned any whiter.

Something, something, Vanilla Ice.

"So let me get this straight. You have a young mare, at the height of her libido, with no outlet for her pent up frustration. And her behavior around you, the only stallion in her world, is a mystery to you?"

"Yes! Exactly!"

Night Light shook his head. "Shining, you're my son. And I am obligated to love you. But sometimes you are a goddamn moron."

The Shining Armor Is a Goddamn Moron cinematic universe is my favorite Marvel creation.

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"Have you talked with Cadance about it?" Night asked.

"She was the first pony I talked to about it. But she said that I'm Flurry's father. So it's my job to deal with it."

And somewhere, Roseluck is passing out cold again.

"Fine. Whatever. You asked for my advice. I've given it to you. You can either accept it or reject it. But I will tell you this: Until you can see Flurry as the mare that she is, instead of the filly that she was, forever as your precious little foal that needs your protecting, then you will always be a child, Shining Armor."

Stern Dad takes from Night Light. You had one job, Shiny. One job!

"Relax. I ain't no snitch." Night Light waved an outdated gang sign with his hooves that Flurry clearly didn't recognize.

What the hell? I'm straight outta Clopton, bitch! Imma open up a forty and bust a nut in yo ass!

"No problem."

"Hey Grampa?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks for being cool."

I do really like the dialogue exchange here. It's really natural... gang signs aside.

"Yeah well, real princesses have curves," he said. "Have you seen how many pancakes Celestia eats for breakfast?" Flurry giggled.

A reference to Celestia overeating that doesn't involve actual cake? What sorcery is this?

"Ugh!" she growled in frustration. She levitated the CoolCo® coolerator behind her and pressed it against her marehood. The cold was a shock at first that quickly gave way to relief. She pressed the length of it sideways against her hot vulva for a minute before finally pushing the rounded tip into her vagina and slipping the full length of it inside, sending the patented long-last CoolCo® coolerator coolant container to her core.

This is the first clopfiction I've ever read with such aggressive product placement! And why do I have the sudden urge to buy magical dildos?

It was an older model.

But it checked out.

"Yeah, well..." she trailed off as she chewed some more fries. "This is nice. It's the closest thing I'll ever have to a date. At least until Mom marries me off to some foreign prince in a political power move."

She does make being a Princess sound pretty terrible. Like being a celebrity except you're drafted into it from birth.

"Fine I don't-"

Comma after fine.

"Alright, alright." He leaned over and opened the coffee table drawer and took out a couple small wrapped sweets. "Do you want some chocolate?" he asked.

"That's a stereotype."

It is? I just thought that was a good way of recovering from a dementor attack.

"These aren't the ones you know," he said. "These are the grim, original ones! These aren't about princesses and happily ever afters. These are mostly about foals getting into trouble and getting eaten by witches and wolves."

Or killing the witch, to be fair. Those are always fun.

"Red Trotting Hood! I remember that one!"

"Do you remember how it ends?"

Little Red Riding Hood takes it deep from warewolf. At least in my headcanon.

"The wolf ate her grandmother and was wearing her fur like a coat."

Still not as grim as some of the Warcraft lore. Did you know one of the Black Dragons ends up getting raped by Big Boss Dragon who cums lava, gets her legs burned off and spends the rest of her life being bred by the other dragons until a group of adventures and heroes show up to put her out of her misery with spells and pointy sticks? Yeesh...

"I'm fine, come on!" Flurry grabbed the book. "All the better to eat you with!" she read. "The wolf licked his lips and grabbed Little Red Trotting Hood, throwing her on the bed and spreading her legs, before he- oh."

Why did I not see this coming? Someone's been borrowing from my headcanon!

"Language! But yeah, in the old version that was what happened. And then he eats her for real."

Germany, was that you? That sounds like something you'd think up!

"Flurry that's enough!" he scolded. "Look I know you're at that age and right now that's all that's on your mind. I know. I used to be your age too at one point."

"Hmff. Yeah. Before the planet cooled."

lol wrekt

"What- no, I'm happy you're here. I just meant, with you like... this." He motioned at her with his hoof. "Why didn't you bring your own cooler, or take some Beat The Heat?"

"I would have if I had any!" she said. "You might want to pretend that I'm still a filly, but at least you know better. Mom on the other hoof really thinks I'm still a little filly! To her it's inconceivable that I could be feeling this way!"

Ehhhhhhh, that's a pretty weak excuse for the sake of the story. I'll let it pass because this is actually holding my interest well. Our main characters converse well and are very interesting.

"I don't want it to be with Dad," she said. "I mean, I don't anymore. Now that I know all that. Besides, it sounds like he has his hooves full anyway. I guess I'm the odd one out, too."

"Mhmm."

She softly nuzzled her cheek against him.

"I don't want to be the odd one out anymore, Grampa."

The cuckoldry is... mildly distressing, though I wouldn't call this most egregious writing sin of all time. He's had his family and just doesn't give a shit anymore. I wouldn't exactly call this relatable but fuck, he's going to have sex with his granddaughter. Not like he's locked in the shed or something.

I'll finish this tomorrow. Upvoted!

"Shining, you're my son. And I am obligated to love you. But sometimes you are a goddamn moron."

*sideways glances at his unfinished fics folder*

...I felt that.

"The mare living in a house with seven dudes?"

This conjures a familiar image.

"Okay... It just blow my mind that he married somepony like Mom. How in Equestria did he manage that?"

It's a mystery...

Not sure how I feel about the presence of geldings, given that most of the story has a more modern outlook.

This isn't a family tree, it's a fucking family line.