*Do not be fooled by the huge dislike ratio. It's just bullies and good-for-nothing trolls who love to downvote and walk away hoping to cause trouble. (16 downvotes after just loading a simple prologue) GIVE THE FIC A CHANCE!*
-The Devils: An evil race from for another dimension, lead by a spiteful ruler, plan to invade all worlds and destroy all love and light so they may survive.
-Celestia is having recurring nightmares of evil creature that lurks deep within her subconscious, and she is desperate to silence it.
-Applejack discovers that her parents made an arranged marriage for her, and now her time is coming.
-Pinkie Pie falls in love with one of the Devil's, which can lead to serious trouble for herself and the team
-Sunset Shimmer (The human version) is still getting used to her new life in United Equestria, and Artie has obvious feelings for her.
-Rarity has a horrible accident that forces her body to undergo an alteration... into a part Dragon creature.
-The CMC are graduating grade school and ready to move on to middle school, but don't know if they can bear to be separated.
Why don't you disable the ratings for your stories?
Awesome!
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Because I'm not afraid, and besides. I can also show people up for the vain, shallow idiots they are (Just down-voting a walking away) and also, if I hide the ratio, people will think "Oooh, he's hiding his ratings, which means it must have a HUGE DISLIKE RATIO, which means it sucks"
People shouldn't judge the fics by the size of the dislike bar (Especially since most of it just walk-aways without even reading, just trying to cause trouble) and that's the nonsense I'm trying to put a stop to.
Edit: I mean look at these turds; downvoting me even when I comment, or when someone comments nice to me, and they only praise people who are hostile with me. That's just plain sick, and they ought to be disciplined for it.
Honest review. The sentance structure flips back and forth from 3rd person to 2nd person and in a few spots to 1st person. Sometimes in the same paragraph.
There are quite a few spelling and grammatical errors.
I would suggest getting an editor to help out. The premise is good for a base.
Quick question: Are Pear Butter and Bright Mac alive in your universe?Disregard question; yes they are.
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Read Season 7 You'll see what happened to them
Hmm... I find it hard to feel engaged when reading this prologue because of the excessive use of commas. They pull me out of any immersion. It comes down to the basic sentence structure combined with a stark lack of description. I don't know about story-writing practices so I can't comment on that. I haven't read the rest so I can't tell for sure if the eye-catching ratio is warranted.
Not my type of story, but I won't downvote just for that, the pacing seemed off to me, I'ma head back to my tacos
The three extra words in the prologue bugs me a tiny bit. “1003”. *shivers*
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I don't understand...