ExcArc
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First Prize makes the sun rise.
this is an start of something beautiful
i just hope you update this regularly seen lots of stories start off good then the writer losses focus.... you have my attention ( both of them 
)
Interesting less "Do as I say slave" more "I'm in charge but I'm going to guide and teach you along the way" I can get behind this as long as crazy shit don't start happening.
9427571
So, like Moonstone? (Luna/Fleur dom/sub relationship exploration, if you didn't know)
9427888
If this is garbage. I'm happy to be a trash collector.
Though... what, in your mind, would not constitute a "trash" label? Seriously, I'm curious.
~Skeeter The Lurker
Aw.
I wanted to see that.
~Skeeter The Lurker
9427888
I just read your other comment that said the same thing on another story. If you're trying to be a joker for lulz, everyone is missing the joke, which might mean you need to rethink the joke.
9428122
It low-tier bait. Ignore him. Anyone who posts about Alex Jones on FimFic isn't worth anyone's time.
9428157
Oh is that what he posted? How... cute.
Oh, before I forget, nice fic so far! Looking forward to where you go with it.
Like the guy above me, I'm getting "Moonstone" vibes from this and that is so not a bad thing!
~Skeeter The Lurker
Should be hoof But other than that good story.
Shaky premise, as noted by tempest.
love how you portrayed her here BTW.
derpicdn.net/img/2018/7/25/1789183/large.png
also, you could't have invoked the tree or the table for this?
like his dick will save equestira from her loneliness or something?
9427923
maybe, I tend to stick to the non-clopping side of fimfiction for the most part, so meh, horse on horse sex isn't really something I read about unless they've gone anthro. I'm talking Celestia being in charge of the relationship but guiding First Prize through his sexual awakening with kindness yet a bit of authority. A female dom story where the woman isn't debasing the male insulting, beating, enslaving the male and otherwise treating him like trash. I don't like that in sub/dom relationship stories even male dom or if mind control is involved. It destroys the very nature of the relationship and what it's supposed to represent. These kinds of relationships at their core are about trust, and even though the dom is doing all of the ordering, the sub is the one truly in charge b/c the sub dictates the pace, roughness, and kind of treatment the dom is allowed to give. It's the dom's job to ensure that the sub follows orders while at the same time making sure the sub knows they are safe. When the sub says to stop the dom stops end of story. Any dom who continues after the sub has expressed a desire to end the session shouldn't be leading this kind of lifestyle.
9428297
I felt like a supernaturally impetus would interfere with the more human (equine?) motivation that Celestia is simply lonely.
Also an emphasis on the premise isn't particularly important. The Tree of Harmony demanding he marry Celestia is just as ridiculous as the Celestia wanting a partner and using a magic spell to find one.
9428157
Oh that guy goes on lots of stories to post stupid and pointless things. Definitely not my first time encountering him.
Loved this so far, more please!
Question, does Celestia smoking in the cover art mean she does so in the story?
9429122
Nope!
9428471
Yeah, sounds like Moonstone. Luna and Fleur's relationship is founded on exploring an equitable dom-sub relationship, where the dom only goes as far as the sub is willing to be pushed. At one point there's a very stark comparison made between Luna and Fleur's healthy relationship versus another couple's very one-sided and unhealthy relationship.
Thing's aren't always peachy-keen, but the story is generally positive.
9429180
Cool, still though those kinds of dom/sub relationship as far as I know are par for the course. Doms push subs to test their limits and possibly go further. In the end though the sub has final say. Those relationships rely so much on trust and loyalty though the trust also comes from if they choose to explore bondage which is another level of trust completely, if couple can work out a healthy sub/dom relationship you have my respect. It's sad that society raises their noses at such relationships b/c people can benefit so much from them. Granted the opposite is also true such relationships can be extremely damaging both mentally and physically if handled without care.
15 feet square is a tiny little military cot. Poor Celly, such a tiny bed for a big mare. :(
9429813
Ponies use a different measurement system, don't worry. 15 feet square is plenty of space in their measurement system.
Lemke! We need a Y on Line 42, please! That's a letter Y to line 42, thank you.
That was great
Liking it so far, keep up the good work Arc!
Having a blast with this so far, keep up the good work!
In what way will the next chapter be weird?
Are we talking kinky weird?
This is looking to be a great read!!!
"Being valuable"... that has a whole lot of interpretations. I'd like to hear if the street sweeping business he worked for wound up falling apart with him gone, because it sounds like he's had a fairly unimportant life up to this point.
Unless it isn't referring to the importance of what he does in and of himself, but as a part of something larger. That isn't much of a talent, though... all lives influence others and change the direction they go, making everyone objectively valuable.
9433810
No. It will be a third person intermission
officially end
Canterlot. For
the resulting
repetition
cozy enough
Hm the repetition here is on purpose?
Hmm she did see him, didn't she?
a repeat performance
What would a boutique have to do with the presence of a food court?
First Prize is a great main character, his shyness is adorable and when he has built his confidence he will be an amazing stallion. Until then Rock Solid is also a good pair for him, he is confident and strong and I love how they have almost a buddy-cop relationship. I do hope you incorporate Raven a bit more into this fic as well, her bitchy exterior obviously is up for fun even without the sex.
This is becoming very good. I am really enjoying this fic!
You friend. First story on the site and it's golden! I love watching First blunder around and can't wait to see the antics he gets up to. Keep going, it's awesome!
i.imgur.com/QpnBp7G.jpg
i.imgur.com/NErFV6F.gif
Celestia may need to tie a ribbon around that, to be sure she's won First Prize...
and
9439756
I understood that reference.
9440006
Entirely unintentional, but I'll take it!
Ooh, here she comes
This is the single funniest thing i have ever seen said about school. I laughed so hard at this during my late night reading i almost woke my fiance.
BTW i really respect your writing style. It is crisp and detailed with a touch of class with interesting yet often underused words without using to many of them to drive away the average reader. You really do hold a remarkable ballance here and it shows. Great work!
Now I'm really interested in how Celestia became aware of First Prize enough that she felt this would be a reasonable decision. I wonder, has she been moonlighting as a regular pony, and run across him?
9429813
This one's simply for... "bracing," not for sleeping.
I bet the intention was "15 feet square" as opposed to "15 square feet." English is bizarre that those two mean very different things.
Good, I was actually hoping for good swaths of story between the sex.
I'm guessing that's because she doesn't seem to have... "cleaned up" while sprucing up before heading out.
9446877
That is purely thanks to my editors. I talk like a PSAT course. They swat me with newspapers until I comply.