• Member Since 9th Feb, 2017
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the7Saviors

I am a self proclaimed horror and dark fantasy fic writer. You want darkness, death, and despair? You've come to the right place. Also an eternal Twilight Sparkle and avid Lovecraft fan.

the7Saviors Joined 9th Feb, 2017 · Offline

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Golden Fang Ryu Shenron
Golden Fang Ryu Shenron #1 · Nov 27th, 2018 · · · Here's to a Fresh Start ·
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I'm going to die.



Then, just like that, both the thought and the panic were buried under the haze of lightheadedness once more. It was all too much, and at this point I just wanted it all to stop. My earlier fear of death was replaced by the far more intense desire to end the madness of my current situation.

Then, mercifully, I could feel myself slipping away.

No...Twilight please no:applecry:.

Golden Fang Ryu Shenron
Golden Fang Ryu Shenron #3 · Nov 27th, 2018 · · · Here's to Good Health ·
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"S-Starlight?" I cried, stumbling closer to the bars of my cage, "Starlight, is that you? Can you hear me?"

Starlight:rainbowderp:? She's alive:pinkiegasp:?!

"I... I don't understand," I replied weakly, "what's going on? Where are we, and why are we in cages?" I looked around, suddenly aware that something was missing. My eyes widened again and my heart began to race as I realized what it was, "wait... where's Spike... a-and where's..."

That's what I want to know:applejackunsure:. If Starlight's here then...the others have to be...right:applejackunsure:?

"Oh no," I muttered in horrified shock, "oh no... nononono..." I fell back against the bars at the back of my cage before raising my head and giving the stallion a pleading look, "I don't know where this is, who you are, or why you threw Starlight and I in cages, but you have to let us out."

"Um... no?" the stallion answered with an incredulous raise of his brow, "we didn't slap those chains on ya and throw you two in cages just so we could let you out, at least not until we reach our client anyway."

Uh...what client:unsuresweetie:?

"Look, princess," the stallion interjected with an irritated frown, "I don't know what you're on about, but you're startin' to sound awfully insane. There was no baby dragon, there was no other alicorn, and I'm not lettin' you out of that cage."

Why not:twilightangry2:?!

By all rights, I should've hated the mare for what she'd done. I should've had Celestia lock her away in the deepest pits of Tartarus for tampering with the timestream like she had, but I couldn't do that.

I was the Princess of Friendship for a reason. I didn't have it in me to do something like that. I had even gone so far as to save her from the other me, putting both myself and Spike at risk in order to do so.

Yeah, you did...you wanted Starlight to see the error of her ways, and teach her friendship, and you succeeded:pinkiesad2:.

But it was her fault that we were even in that mess to begin with.

True...:applejackunsure:.

The fact that I had suffered through traumatic memories didn't lessen her own experiences. She was just as much a victim as I was of what happened in that bleak world, if not more so. She was the one that was almost eaten alive.

Also true...:pinkiesick:.

It was worth it because I was able to save that poor mare from a life of solitude in that wretched place. She didn't deserve what happened to her, and out of all of us, she's the one that suffered the most.

Yes...she did:ajsleepy:.

"Let's just say our clients tend to pay very well for the merchandise we provide and leave it at that, shall we?" Sandpit replied with a knowing smile, "I'm sure you'll put two and two together once we get to where we're goin'."

Merchandise...:rainbowderp:.

"You're pony traffickers," I croaked out in a small, horrified whisper, "you're trying to sell us into slavery."

:twilightoops:.

It just didn't happen in Equestria... at least, not in my Equestria.

That's right... this isn't my timeline, is it?

Oh shit...:pinkiegasp:!

I wanted to curl up and cry, and I might've if it hadn't been the myriad of other thoughts plaguing my mind. What happened to Spike and my alternate self? Did they arrive with us, and if they did, where were they?

That's what I wanna know:applecry:!

No, I'm not sure about my other self, but I know Spike wouldn't abandon me. Something must've happened to them... but what?

I have know idea, and I don't know if I wanna find out:fluttershyouch:.

"Not gonna happen, princess," he muttered. He was quiet for a moment before glancing back at me with an odd sort of frown, "I could charge a literal fortune for you, and my client would happily pay it, so I'm not lettin' you go, not when I'm so close."

To what:twilightangry2:?

Spike, wherever you are, I hope you're okay... you and the other me.

Me too:fluttershysad:.

Alright you have officially gotten my attention bro:pinkiehappy:! I'm loving this already, I cannot wait for more:scootangel::raritywink::heart:!

Phoenix Nebula
Phoenix Nebula #4 · Nov 27th, 2018 · · · Here's to a Fresh Start ·
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Well, shit that escalated fast.

Phoenix Nebula
Phoenix Nebula #5 · Nov 27th, 2018 · · · Here's to Good Health ·
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Hmm... I'm mildly confused... why does twilight remember killing Pinkie pie? When did this happen? I must have missed something.

the7Saviors
the7Saviors #6 · Nov 27th, 2018 · · · Here's to Good Health ·
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9317743
She's referring to the memory she saw in the last chapter of Those Left Behind.

Chillean
Chillean #7 · Nov 27th, 2018 · · · Here's to Good Health ·
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Sooo stoked. The original was done very well, keeping me wondering the entire time and ending with a bang. This isn't at all what I was expecting, but then again you've never done that :trixieshiftright:
Trust in the author, they haven't given too many reasons to doubt the machinations of the stories in the past. Onward! :rainbowdetermined2:

Venerable Ro
Venerable Ro #9 · Nov 27th, 2018 · · · Here's to Good Health ·
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Dangum, Twilight just can't catch a break.

FanficReader920
FanficReader920 #10 · Nov 28th, 2018 · · · Here's to Good Health ·
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Hmmmmm... Already we have some mysteries afoot.

Holding off on theories for now, but you'll bet I'll have some sometime.

Golden Fang Ryu Shenron
Golden Fang Ryu Shenron #11 · Nov 29th, 2018 · · · Here's to Old Friends ·
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Am I really going to let Rainbow Dash go into the Everfree to face that thing alone, where she has every chance of never coming back?

Of course not:rainbowdetermined2:!

Once that question had crossed her mind, the answer was instantaneous. That monster had taken far too many lives as it was, and Fluttershy would be damned to Tartarus if she let Rainbow Dash suffer the same fate, not when she'd already managed to survive once.

No one messes with RD or Fluttershy:twilightangry2:!

I don't know how this is going to end, but it won't be with your death, Rainbow... that's my promise, and I'll keep it, no matter what I have to do.

Here comes Angryshy:flutterrage:!!!

The Cynical One
The Cynical One #12 · Nov 29th, 2018 · · · Here's to Old Friends ·
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Dammit other Twilight! Don’t murder ponies! It isn’t nice man!

new55
new55 #13 · Nov 29th, 2018 · · · Here's to Old Friends ·
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I wonder if she killed those Pegasus because of the time travel/universe jumping severing her connection to that spirit or something else?

FanficReader920
FanficReader920 #14 · Nov 30th, 2018 · · · Here's to Old Friends ·
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I’m..... confused. Probably need a few more chapters.

the7Saviors
the7Saviors #15 · Nov 30th, 2018 · · · Here's to Old Friends ·
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9321708
Here's something that might help. Recall what happened immediately after Twilight left Tartarus and returned to Equestria in the last story.

ANBRAN
ANBRAN #16 · Nov 30th, 2018 · · · Here's to Old Friends ·
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WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING OOOONNNNNNN

Greenhorn
Greenhorn #17 · Dec 6th, 2018 · · · Here's to Old Friends ·
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I see so this is another timeline caused by sudden scream in the first chapter, which prevent Dash to create Rainboom and restore the original timeline.

Venerable Ro
Venerable Ro #18 · Dec 11th, 2018 · · · Here's to Wonderful Memories ·
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Well at least he didn't take a bite out of the sodding table, that wouldn't have done anyone any favors.

Golden Fang Ryu Shenron
Golden Fang Ryu Shenron #19 · Dec 11th, 2018 · · · Here's to Wonderful Memories ·
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"Stupid random table," he grumbled, shaking his head in disappointment, "what kind of crystal is that, anyway? Didn't taste edible at all. Tasted like some kind of... whoa..."

The Cutie Map:pinkiegasp:?! Wait, is Spike in the...Sombra Verse:rainbowderp:?!

Thoughts about how much longer their farm was going to last, thoughts on whether or not a war would break out between Equestria and the Crystal Empire, thoughts about the sister who'd left her home to live the high society life in Manehattan so many years ago.

Called it:facehoof:!

"Big Mac, I... I can't remember anything from before I woke up on that hill."

...What:rainbowderp:?

No...no...no no no no no NO!!!

Big Mac opened his mouth to respond, but had no words to give. He snapped it shut and gave the dragon a troubled grimace. This was the first time he'd ever seen a dragon, and out of nowhere, one drops out of his tree, with amnesia no less.



It was turning out to be a very strange day for the large stallion indeed.

Oh boy...this may not turn out well:twilightoops:.

Zeprto678
Zeprto678 #20 · Dec 11th, 2018 · · · Here's to Wonderful Memories ·
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I bet the other Twilight ended up in the main timeline with Starlight Glimmer?

FanficReader920
FanficReader920 #21 · Dec 11th, 2018 · · · Here's to Wonderful Memories ·
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Huh. This timeline is sounding pretty interesting.

Sir Budginton
Sir Budginton #22 · Dec 11th, 2018 · · · Here's to Wonderful Memories ·
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9341512
I think this is more of a daybreaker timeline. Because it was said that the days were longer, and Equestria has a queen. (Plus the cover art)

The Cynical One
The Cynical One #24 · Dec 12th, 2018 · · 1 · Here's to Wonderful Memories ·
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Amnesia thing is great... until a certain sparkly pony wants him back. I’m excited as you are... Great chapter too! Although I am getting hints at a certain pony in charge Daybreaker isn’t it? doing something wrong. Oh well we’ll have to see.

Mr cold ghost
Mr cold ghost #25 · Dec 26th, 2018 · · · Here's to Endless Joy ·
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Alt pinkie pie! I am looking forward to her backstory!

Golden Fang Ryu Shenron
Golden Fang Ryu Shenron #26 · Dec 26th, 2018 · · 1 · Here's to Endless Joy ·
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I'll find a way to get us out of here, Starlight, then we'll get you the help you need...

Hopefully:fluttershysad:.

" Queen Daybreaker , is far too busy negotiating some kind of deal with the Crystal Empire to bother looking into such matters, Princess , and besides..." he chuckled darkly before turning around slightly and giving me a malicious grin, "...where you're going, ain't nopony gonna see you except for who we want to see you."

Queen Daybreaker then:duck:?

"And let me tell you, Princess ," he barked out another laugh, "the client ain't somepony who cares about status or tribe. We could bring them our glorious Queen all trussed up in chains and they'd treat her just the same as they would any other pony."

Like a sniffling whelp:unsuresweetie:?

Did the me of this timeline actually band together with the others to stop her, only for Celestia to suddenly turn evil? Did Celestia herself defeat Nightmare Moon? Did Nightmare Moon somehow manage to revert back to Luna, and if so, where was she?





...Was she still alive?

That's what I wanna know:applejackunsure:?

"Equestria is a better place than this, and I can't and won't believe for a minute that Pr... that Queen Daybreaker would allow something like this to go on if she knew!"

There's only one problem with that Twilight...this isn't your Equestria:applejackunsure:.

"I don't know all the details, but I do know that Queen Daybreaker got rid of both the nobles and the council that supported her," Ghost Pepper replied grimly, "now she makes all the decisions herself."

Really now:duck:?

"You wouldn't think that given the state she's reduced Equestria to, princess," came Sandpit's voice, "ever since she killed Nightmare Moon, I don't think she's been right in the head."

Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa! Celestia/Daybreaker...killed Nightmare Moon/Luna:pinkiegasp:?!

"From what I heard, they couldn't get one up on the other," Ghost Pepper continued. He snorted and glared at nothing in particular, "the way it goes from ponies who there, Celestia didn't want to finish Nightmare Moon off so they fought to a standstill, and then the Moon Nag started going for the citizens."

Of course:facehoof:.

"Anyway, the Princess and Nightmare Moon somehow wound up fighting over Vanhoover, and I guess Nightmare Moon must've had enough, because she blew up the whole Tartarus damned city. Wiped it off the map, and not a one of the ponies living there made it out of the blast zone."

...nopony survived:rainbowderp:? By Faust:pinkiegasp:.

"And she hasn't been the same since," Ghost Pepper finished, "called herself Queen Daybreaker and made some announcement about how things were gonna change, and that she'd never let anything threaten 'her little ponies' like that ever again. Started building up Equestria's military, spending an insane amount of bits on that and developing new weapons."

Oh boy...:twilightoops:.

"The other nations wouldn't like that," I muttered numbly, "especially Griffonia. Equestria is already a hegemony, and many of the other countries around Equestria might see this as an attempt to gain even more of a dominion over the weaker nations. Not to mention the damage this could do to the economy, and if she's drafting ponies into military service that would make it all the worse. Ponies aren't meant to go to war, not like what this could lead to."

True:applejackunsure:.

"Star— oof !" before I could get anything else out, the wagon slammed back onto all fours, and I slammed into the bars of my cage, my back exploding in pain from the impact, " nngh ... w-what's..." I grunted, struggling to my hooves, "Sandpit, what the hay is going on?!"

What the...:rainbowhuh:?

Sandpit tried to rise to his hooves, but a pink hoof kicked him over onto his back and smashed into his chest, apparently with enough force to knock the wind out of him. The mare stood atop Sandpit and glared down at him, her raspberry colored mane falling around her face in a flat curtain.

Pinkie Pie:pinkiegasp:!!!

In all honesty, I hadn't given any kind of thought to what the girls might be going through in this timeline, and had I known this is how I'd find Pinkie Pie, I would've been far more worried.

Me too:twilightoops:.

The Faceless Maker
The Faceless Maker #27 · Dec 27th, 2018 · · · Here's to Endless Joy ·
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Well. This oughta be entertaining...

FanficReader920
FanficReader920 #28 · Dec 27th, 2018 · · · Here's to Endless Joy ·
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Interesting timeline. I like how this story is making it’s on Mythos while still connecting to its predecessor.

CuriousCurse
CuriousCurse #29 · Jan 1st, 2019 · · · Here's to Endless Joy ·
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Oh there are so many amazing ways this could go. Can't wait for the next chapter!

Golden Fang Ryu Shenron
Golden Fang Ryu Shenron #30 · Jan 10th, 2019 · · · Here's to One's Chosen Path ·
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He even began to fall into a rhythm, and while he didn't particularly enjoy the work, he was content with the process, but it was clear he was running out of steam, and a glance over to Big Mac revealed a similarly tired expression. The exhausted dragon was about to suggest a break when a loud, long cry rang out from the nearby forest.

Whoa, what was that:twilightoops:?!

"Hey, uh... BIg Mac?" Spike began hesitantly, "what do you think that was?"

Big Mac narrowed his eyes slightly, his ears twitching every so often as if expecting another cry.

"Nothin' good."

I bet not:rainbowderp:.

"Big Mac!" the stallion cried as he and the mare came to a stop in front of the larger pony, "Big Mac, what the hay was that all about?" he blinked and furrowed his brow in confusion as he spotted the little dragon standing atop Big Mac's back, "and... is that a dragon?"

Just smile and wave Spike...smile and wave:twilightsheepish:.

"Awww~" the mare cooed as she yanked Spike off of Big Mac's back and pulled him into a tight embrace, "well ain't you just the most adorable little thing!"

Well that worked out better than expected:rainbowlaugh:!!!

"Wha—hey, let go, I can't..." the helpless drake grunted in both surprise and annoyance as he tried to pull himself out of the mare's strong grip, "Big Mac, can you please do something?"

Enope:eeyup::rainbowlaugh:!!!

"Ah ain't goin' in alone, Red Delicious," Big Mac interjected calmly, "no doubt the Mayor's gonna send some ponies out ta investigate. Ah'll join em' an' be back before ya know it," before Red Delicious could open his mouth to argue again, Big Mac raised a hoof to stop him, "the Everfree is too close to the farm ta just ignore what's goin' on. Ah gotta do what ah can ta protect this farm an' the rest o' mah family, ain't ya ain't gonna stop me."

Apple Family Stubbornness at its finest:eeyup:.

Why had he just let her go like that? Why didn't he do anything to stop her? He should've done more to convince her to stay, should've fought harder and said more, but in the end, he'd relented, and it had turned out to be one of the biggest regrets of his life.

Oh Mac:fluttershysad:.

Big Mac knew all too well that without Applejack, the family didn't feel complete, and to this very day it still felt like there was something missing.

Totally:ajsleepy:.

It wasn't just him that could feel it either.

I bet not:applecry:.

"W-Wait!" Spike suddenly shouted, making Big Mac stop in his tracks and turn a quizzical frown towards the dragon. Spike grit his teeth as he tried to wrest himself from Apple Bumpkin with little success, "take me with you! I... I think I might be able to learn something if I go!"

Spike are you nuts:twilightoops:?!?!

Still, if he truly believed whatever was out there could help him get his memory back, who was Big Mac to stop him, really? He may have earned respect, but he wasn't family, and thus Big Mac had no obligation to hold him back from doing what he felt was right, even if he himself knew it was the wrong decision.

Not like with a certain other pony.

Certain pony...:duck:.

"...Alright then," Big Mac relented, "ya'll can tag along, just remember that this ain't no field trip, and that we're headed into a place where critters would chomp ya down as soon as look at ya."

No kidding:twilightoops:!!!

"But... you sure, Big Mac?" Apple Bumpkin replied, looking down at Spike with no small amount of concern, "I mean, he's just a little guy an' all. I don't think—"

"Hey, I can take care of myself," Spike cut in with an indignant frown, "I may not look like it, but I'm pretty tough, y'know? A stupid old forest isn't gonna bring me down."

"Ah'm more worried about the critters in the forest, sweetie," Apple Bumpkin deadpanned, "ya got a tough hide, sure, but some o' them critters have some nasty teeth that could bite right through solid rock from what I hear."

Aint that the truth:fluttershyouch:!

"Finally," Spike muttered, flexing his arms and legs as he tried to get the kinks out, "you're really strong, you know that?"

"So I've been told," the mare replied with a small smirk. It fell a moment later in favor of another worried frown, "hope yer able ta remember who ya are. Ah know ah'd feel terrible if ah couldn't remember mah family."

"Family," Spike quietly repeated to himself, "yeah... right."

Oh Spike...:applecry:.

"Right, coming!" Spike called back as he made his way over to the red stallion. He paused a little ways away from the other two ponies and turned back to Apple Bumpkin with a wide, reassuring grin, "BIg Mac and I will be back before you know it, just you wait! Then I can tell you guys all about how awesome of a dragon I am!"

Oh I bet the cant wait to hear that:derpytongue2:!

Big Mac nodded once and together, they took off towards Ponyville proper. Though neither said as much outwardly, both of them could feel the large knot of unease in their gut, and it was only growing worse as they thought about what they might find in the Everfree.

Probably something not good:pinkiesick:.

FanficReader920
FanficReader920 #31 · Jan 11th, 2019 · · · Here's to One's Chosen Path ·
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So AJ moves to Manehatten in this timeline?

the7Saviors
the7Saviors #32 · Jan 11th, 2019 · · · Here's to One's Chosen Path ·
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9397046
Well technically she moves to Manehattan in the original timeline, but she stays there in this one.

Golden Fang Ryu Shenron
Golden Fang Ryu Shenron #34 · Jan 24th, 2019 · · · Here's to Allies, Old and New ·
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"—I don't care if you come or not," Rainbow continued, "I don't care if this stallion comes or not, all I care about is finding the thing in that forest. The only reason I'm even here is because I'm not stupid enough to go in alone without at least trying to get help first."

"But you'd go in alone if nopony was here, I take it?" Big Mac asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Yup," Rainbow replied simply, "I need to see whatever made that noise with my own eyes, and I'm gonna see it whether I'm alone or not," she turned back to the Mayor, "so we gonna do this or what? Cause I'm ready to go—"

Typical Dash:ajsmug:.

"Fluttershy, why did you come here?" Rainbow asked after a few moments, "I told I wasn't gonna just sit around and wait. I'm gonna search the Everfree until I find that thing, and I'm not coming back until I do."

"I... I know," Fluttershy replied, taking a deep breath before straightening up, pushing her unkempt mane out of her face, and raising her head to look Rainbow Dash in the eye, "I know I can't stop you, Rainbow, and that's why I'm coming too."

Brave step you're taking there Flutters:twilightsmile:.

What was Fluttershy truly afraid of?

Losing you Dash:fluttershysad:.

"Fluttershy," Rainbow tried half-heartedly, "you don't have to—"

"I'm not letting you go without me, Rainbow Dash," Fluttershy interjected, "if I can't stop you from putting your life at risk, then I want to be there to make sure you keep your promise to come back alive, and I'll make sure you keep it. That's my promise."

Speaking of...:pinkiesmile:.

"Is... is that a baby dragon?" she asked, moving around the stallion to get a better look at Spike, "it is! Oh, what are you doing here, little one? You must be far from home to have ended up all the way here in Ponyville."

"Um," Spike replied, caught off guard by the attention. He looked down at Big Mac, who lowered his hoof and shrugged. When he went to looked back to Fluttershy, he found the doting mare had lifted herself off the ground to get right into his face, "gah! I-I mean, uh... hi there... my name's Spike, and I—"

"You can talk?" Fluttershy gasped, "oh that's amazing! I had no idea dragons could speak! You said your name was Spike? How adorable!" before Spike could do anything about it, he found himself once more snatched up into a tight, relentless embrace, "you have to tell me more about yourself. How old are you? How'd you get here? What do dragons eat? I have all kinds of animal feed back at my house, maybe I can—"

Never change Fluttershy, never change:rainbowlaugh:!!!

"I really hope this doesn't become a trend," Spike muttered, "seriously."

Yeah, about that Spike...:ajsmug:.

"So... what happened to her wings?" Spike asked once the doors had closed, "that pony... what did Fluttershy call her? Rainbow Dash?"

"Ah don't know, but ah get the feeling whatever's in that forest has somethin' ta do with it," Big Mac replied before twisting around to give Spike a disapproving glare, "but don't go askin' her about 'em, ya hear?"

"Yeah, I got it," Spike replied, raising his claws defensively, "don't worry, I won't. She'd probably deck me in the face if I asked anyway."

In this timeline, I wouldn't put it past her to do just that:applejackunsure:.

karnazom
karnazom #35 · Jan 26th, 2019 · · · Here's to Allies, Old and New ·
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I came to the story...because of the title*Autism Intesifies!!!*

Overall i just read the first chapter, it's a good story to be partially honest:ajsmug:

JMP
JMP #36 · Jan 31st, 2019 · · · Here's to Allies, Old and New ·
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Curious about the Solar Guards and why Big Mac considers them worse than whatever's in the Everfree. And well, the thing itself. Another mystery timeline.

Golden Fang Ryu Shenron
Golden Fang Ryu Shenron #37 · Feb 3rd, 2019 · · · Here's to Freedom ·
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Pinkie said nothing in response, merely narrowing her eyes and pressing her hoof deeper into his chest and making him grunt in pain. She turned and cast a glance towards the wagon, finally taking notice of me and the fact that I was still chained up in a cage. Her eyes briefly widened in surprise beneath her flowing pink curtain of a mane, but she quickly stifled the expression behind a mask of indifference.

"Maud!" she cried out suddenly as she returned a venomous gaze to Sandpit, "get that cage open!"

Maud?

I didn't have time to dwell on the name before hearing a cry that was suddenly cut off somewhere behind me. I turned and saw the grey earth pony mare moving away from a now unconscious—or at least I hoped that was the case—Ghost Pepper. Upon closer inspection, I could see that it was indeed Pinkie's older sister, though she was missing her trademark frock.

Yeah, Pinkie and Maud:scootangel:!

"What?! N- No !" came Sandpit's desperate, angry reply, "that purple nag is our ticket outta all this! If you think I'm just gonna—"

Dude, you are bucked...this is Pinkie and Maud your dealing with:pinkiecrazy:!

If she's strong enough to bend such high quality metal with only her bare hooves...

Yay for Maud:scootangel:!

I looked over to where the wagon was, and noticed, with a start, that both Pinkie and Maud were watching the two of us from a distance. I couldn't read either mare's face from where I was, but further behind, I could see that Sandpit was no longer moving and my heart skipped a beat.

Oh, Pinkie... please don't tell me you—

...She did...:ajsleepy:.

"W-What happened?" she croaked, "where... w-where are we, Twilight Sparkle? Why am I in a cage?" as she spoke, her composure began to return, though her fear was quickly giving way to anger as she sat upright, "what did you... what did that... that... thing do to me?!" she ground her teeth and shook her head once before stomping a hoof, "what in Celestia's name is going on here?!"

Clam down Starlight...:twilightoops:. Fearing out is the last thing you need right now:twilightoops:.

"I need to know what's going on, right now , Twilight Sparkle," came Starlight's strained voice. I returned my attention to her and saw that she had followed my gaze, a hard frown on her face as she stared back at the other two mares, "what happened and where are we now?"

Your in the middle of a War induced Equestria, that's what:fluttershysad:.

"I used Starswirl's time spell to get us back home, but..." I grimaced, "...something went wrong and we wound up here," I replied dully, "I don't know what happened directly after that, but when I woke up, we were both in cages, captured by slavers."

One that were complete jackasses:twilightangry2:!

"They were going to sell us off, but they—" I nodded towards Pinkie and Maud, "—ambushed the slavers and freed me. I just freed you, and that's more or less all I know regarding our current situation. I don't know what happened to Spike or the other Twilight, and as for where we are..."

...it's a place that is the very opposite of the magical Equestria everypony knows:applecry:.

"We made it out of that horrible wasteland... but we didn't quite make it home."

No, no you have not:ajsleepy:.

JMP
JMP #38 · Feb 3rd, 2019 · · · Here's to Freedom ·
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Well....Starlight's awake. That's 3/4 of the party accounted for. But the last story's Twilight is still MIA. That...well she can take care of herself, but the others around her....I wonder if she's even in her alicorn guise, or if her default is just the light in the vague shape of a pony.

prism heart
prism heart #39 · Feb 3rd, 2019 · · · Here's to Freedom ·
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Well now, I wonder if Star is going to see what else she caused?

gosha305
gosha305 #40 · Feb 6th, 2019 · · · Here's to Freedom ·
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Inspired by another fic, I decided to try writing poems. So, here is one about this story (it's kind of fanfanfiction). It's far from perfect, but I hope you'll enjoy it anyway.
It is supposed to be taught from the point of view of one of the inhabitants of this new Equestria and talks about the Avatar of Vengeance (I think that's how it's called).

Alien creature made of light
Its eldritch shriek fills souls with fright
If you ever hear those screams
You'll be slain within it's beams

Hunting ponies on our land
None survived to tell the tale
All we know: its ghoulish wail
All have failed to make a stand

Its ancient origin unknown
Even to the royal throne
In this mystery it stays
Spreading tales about its blaze

The brave army of the light
That the shadows once expelled
Cannot win this endless fight
By the entity excelled

Chillean
Chillean #41 · Feb 7th, 2019 · · · Here's to Freedom ·
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Hoo boy, scary Pinkie is always unpredictable. I wonder how she got to be the way she is in this timeline?

Nicknine
Nicknine #42 · Feb 8th, 2019 · · 1 · Here's to Wonderful Memories ·
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Well... I liked Those Left Behind but so far this not what I expected from a sequel. The epilogue of the first story was setting up Retribution!Twilight traveling to the original timeline and trying to return back to normal. Instead you immediately deviated into another alternate timeline that has seemingly nothing to do with the previous story. Frankly, it feels like a sequel "in name only" at this point.

the7Saviors
the7Saviors #43 · Feb 8th, 2019 · · · Here's to Wonderful Memories ·
Reply

9446984
Actually, I had mentioned before I wrote the sequel that I wanted to switch prospectives from one Twilight to the other for the sequel. Make no mistake, Bad Future Twi is here, and is a very prominent part of the story, but this time Good Future Twi has the POV spotlight.

The reason it probably feels like a sequel in name only is because I'm working with more than just four characters, and BF Twi hasn't shown up yet. With a bigger cast, there's more to build when it comes to the characters, the plot, and the world, so all I ask is for a bit of patience. BF Twi will definitely have her arc, but as a whole, it's about far more than just her now.

Nicknine
Nicknine #44 · Feb 8th, 2019 · · · Here's to Freedom ·
Reply

9447015
I can see what you're doing but my problem here is that you did not handle the transition well within the narrative. The previous story was building up a specific premise so readers will be going into the sequel with certain expectations but then you seemingly throw it away to tell a different story. On top of that, you seem to be taking time to re-introduce Bad Future!Twilight who was the protagonist of the previous story. In my eyes, this makes for a bad first impression.

the7Saviors
the7Saviors #45 · Feb 8th, 2019 · · · Here's to Freedom ·
Reply

9447031
Perhaps you're right on your first point. While I had always intended to focus on GF Twi from her prospective, BF Twi had a lot more involvement in the beginning. The change stemmed from a combination of not know exactly how to go about my original plans at the time of conception, and a shift in how I wanted GF Twi to undertake her development in the story.

The result will end up being the same as I intended, but the path to get there changed, and unfortunate for those who wanted to immediately reconnect with BF Twi, that will have to wait a bit. That said, I was actually planning to introduce BF Twi in the next chapter, but given the point you're trying to make, that's neither here nor there.

You're disappointed with how the story started, and I can understand why, but at the end of the day, this is a completely different story with a different focus, and that's what I wanted to convey. If how I chose to start the story didn't meet your expectations, all I can say is I'm sorry to hear that, but I thank you for the input all the same. It reminds me that I need to reflect on how I write sequels in the future, not nust as an author, but as a reader who's become invested in the characters of the previous story.

Venerable Ro
Venerable Ro #46 · Feb 27th, 2019 · · · Here's to a Brand New Day ·
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Ah, it seems getting away from that dead world has done wonders for her sanity. Good to know.

FanficReader920
FanficReader920 #47 · Feb 27th, 2019 · · · Here's to a Brand New Day ·
Reply

Finally! Demon-Twi shows up at last!

JMP
JMP #48 · Feb 27th, 2019 · · · Here's to a Brand New Day ·
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Well, good to see the other Twilight. Her new form is interesting. The frost breath makes me think of Windigos? They're...kinda ethereal I guess, but it still leaves a lot of questions.

prism heart
prism heart #49 · Feb 27th, 2019 · · · Here's to a Brand New Day ·
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Hmm.... Welp, time to wait for the next update.

gosha305
gosha305 #50 · Feb 27th, 2019 · · · Here's to a Brand New Day ·
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Wait, what I get here is that the Twilight that finally appeared in this chapter isn't necessarily the same thing as the Avatar of Vengeance or, at least that the Avatar has a mind of its own that this Twilight can't control. Perhaps the time travel separated them in some way... I'm not really sure about this though.

Anyway, I'm extremely happy that we finally get her point of view again!

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