You Must Fight To Live On The Planet Of The Apes
Twilight Sparkle saw many things in the human world. Twilight Sparkle brought some of them back. Whether what she decided to bring back was particularly useful or fitting of a Princess is another matter, but it seemed to have struck a chord with Equestria en masse.
A short, unplanned story written in a couple of hours. It is what it is.
Inspired by Shellac Of North America.
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That was hilarious. Well done.
9063440
Cheers boss
Twilight is bucked.
Yes. Set the world on fire indeed....
I didn't expect such a well written closing chapter.
Given the fun and silly nature of the story.
Nicely done.
9063914
Appreciated, bud
That's the funniest damn thing I've read all day. Bravo.
9064193
Thanks man
This was pretty damn funny! I was honestly surprised to see that it was a first story - most first (or early, looking in your blogs you seem to be working on something else, which I'll be looking forward to!) attempts aren't this good (mine certainly wasn't).
The first chapter alone would have worked pretty well (and what a name for it - Twilight the unwitting Prometheus
), and Rambler worked as a nice little epilogue to it - but I was actually impressed with Billiards more in a sense. As funny as the first part was, Billiards felt like a very real glimpse into how an older Twilight might look back on her life and her friends, and what she might be like. And it had a perfect closing line. Well done!
9065224
Thanks matey, this was the first new thing I'd written since I started that other bigger project I mentioned in my blogs, glad to see people seem to like it.
9066409
Cheers bud
Oh, Twilight. You've just used your first bit of meme magic. There goes the neighborhood.
Nice story
Typo: "Thinking about it now, was this not exactly what he was attempting to do in the first place?" she I think.
I hate to be that guy, but would Twilight Sparkle really use the word decimated when she means defeated or destroyed?
9066773
Corrected, thanks
9067450
I don't see why not, given her vocabulary and the situation. A bit of playful cockiness is fair game IMO, especially when it's a regular play against a regular opponent.
Though really who's to say for sure. Not me, that's for certain.
9067556
Except that there's no indication anywhere else in your story that that's her sense of humor. It's not a call back to anything nor is it obviously ironic; just suddenly, out of nowhere, this very meticulous, very intelligent person, who has thusfar been shown to be highly particular about language, is misusing a very particular word in an obvious and lazy way. While the quality of the story as a whole doesn't suffer much because of it, the mistake, or at least the lack of some kind of mitigating context, does serve to undermine the character and cheapen the overall experience.
Come on. We're all better than that. This is your story and your version of Twilight Sparkle. Everything she says and does here is a direct result of your own authorial prerogative. While you are certainly under no obligation to justify your creative choices to anyone, you do have to take ultimate responsibility for them. If you like things the way they are and see no reason to change them, cool. That is entirely your call, and don't let anyone tell you any differently. Just please, don't be disingenuous about it.
9067932
To be honest with you I did originally have a longer chapter with future Twilight with more dialogue, but I cut it out because I thought it didn't really go anywhere. It might well have set her character better, but I felt it didn't particularly serve the story, and perhaps I still had the cut section in mind when writing the rest of the chapter.
My own particular version of Twilight is a kind of mis-shapen one, I'm really only getting back into this whole horses thing, so if she sounds off to you then that's really on me.
That in mind, and as this story was very much an on-the-fly kind of thing, I can see where you're coming from and wiill keep it in mind for anything else I might do. This story in particular though I'm happy to let slide a little, as I didn't really have a goal or message in mind, it was just a bit if fun for me.
Apologies if my last comment sounded like I was just trying to write you off, it was written in a hurry before I left the house.
Typo:
9069804
Corrected, cheers
9068036
Cool. For what it's worth I really do like your characterization of Twilight. You've kept her loose enough to be whatever you might eventually need her to be while still hitting enough specific beats to give her a definite personality. If this is just you stretching your legs, getting back into the habit of pone, then damn. I'm very much interested in what comes next.
9069987
Appreciated, thanks very much. I'm nothing if not inconsistent though, so we'll see what happens next, haha!
Now all we need is a running commentary for the Princess' game...
9071468
I would love to hear Brian Blessed narrate a game of billiards the way Steve Albini writes about billiards.
Ha!
This is really good for a first story.
9090122
Thanks dude
I've reviewed your story HERE!
Oh no! We corrupted her!
That was a surprisingly moving little ending.
9229916
Thanks chief
Add it to the “Twilight Messes Up Big Time” list, stat!
9066582
TV Tropes refers to this effect as "Memetic Mutation". It's a powerful effect.
I forget what song this line is from, but it feels all too accurate.
"Make a joke and I will sigh, you will laugh and I will cry"
9341972
That is Paranoid by Black Sabbath my man
9342061
Thanks. I remember hearing it somewhere, and couldn't remember for the life of me. Glad somebody caught it.