Her house is in the northeast section of Ponyville, near the Whitetail Woods, and she is not married. She takes care of dozens of animals, both pets and wild critters, and she gets home every day by 8 PM at the latest. She is always in bed by 11 PM, and makes sure to get eight hours of sleep, no matter what. After having a glass of warm milk and doing about twenty minutes of stretches before going to bed, she usually has no problems sleeping until morning. Just like a foal, she wakes up without any fatigue or stress in the morning.
Fluttershy is a pony who wishes to live a very quiet life. She takes care of others with simple needs and makes sure that they're content, living vicariously through their own joy. That is how she deals with society, and she knows that is what brings her happiness.
Although, if she were to fight she wouldn't lose to anypony.
This story is an entry in Aragon's Comedy (is Serious Business) contest, with the prompt "We Learned Something, Unfortunately".
It's a nice story, but, I feel like you could've better explained Discord's reasoning for turning Fluttershy into an Alicorn. Also, I think it would've been more interesting if the reason the tree was going wacko was because of Discord's interference. His transformation of Fluttershy messed with the connection between her and the tree, and it affected the other ponies as a result. I mean, having Fluttershy as an Alicorn doesn't seem necessary except for that bit at the end, but I feel like Twilight easily could've taken care of that if she could.
First of all, getting this out of the way:
i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/001/200/399/7cb.jpg
Second of all, that was really good! I thought the prose was really nice, the plot worked pretty well, it was very funny, and overall I think it's easily the strongest entry in the contest so far. Good luck!
Im still laughing over this one.
I really enjoyed this piece.
Along with Flutters somewhat jaded outlook and approach to everything going on around her and to her.
I wasn't expecting the story to go the way it did. But it worked and I like it. Fluttershy was simply herself (with a little bit of delightful chaos thrown in) and there was the right amount of humor (for me).
Was somepony playing with chlorine trifluoride? Because, in the 50's, one ton of it was spilled and "It burned its way through a foot of concrete floor and chewed up another meter of sand and gravel beneath, completing a day that I’m sure no one involved ever forgot."
8700976
Discord turned Fluttershy into an Alicorn so she won't die of old age in what to him would be a quite short time. (Well, it makes sense to me, anyway.)
This was a joy to read.
From the beginning to the end I could not stop laughing.
This isn't gold. This is REAL. Wherever the ponies are real, this is their story.
How does Harmony end up killing someone? This is not rational.
Harmony IS NOT THE SAME AS ORDER. Why do people keep making this obvious mistake?
No, actually he beat YOU. He twisted your minds such that you were no longer fit to wield the EoH. The Harmony Magic itself kicked his flank instantly and he could do nothing to even stave it off.
Starlight was stronger than Harmony Magic, given that by herself she was able to REMOVE CUTIE MARKS and alter the Bearer's minds in the process, as well as hijacking the Zordon Map Table to her purposes.
And yet her magic too was overwhelmed... by the changelings. As was Discord's, come to think of it.
In fact, one could argue the most powerful magic we've seen has been Changeling Magic, in that it is the only form of magic we've witnessed that's proven capable of completely resisting the Anti-Magic Stone. And so powerful in fact that transforming into Skittles Bugs then proceeded to blow the stone to dust.
8701224 Could be hydrofluoric acid too.
Perchloric acid is the 'strongest' acid, but it can't attack silicon so it wouldn't dissolve sand.
8702140
All you need is love, yeah yeah yeah. Sucked out of the succulent souls of newborn foals, but still love.
8702177 Well, the honest truth is that the power levels and balance in the show is so disorganized you can make a case for the Tatzlewurm being the strongest thing of all.
Dat's what happens when ya don't work out how yer fictional world works ahead of time. It gets messy after a while.
8701651
Oh no, I got what his motivation was, I'm just saying, it'd be better to explain some motivations rather than implying them (even if you do get them). Or better yet, explain that the reason put more of his magic and such into the transformation if because, as mentioned in the story, the other attempts wore off, so he needed a way to make the change more permanent.
Yes, Twilight. As Sunset has stated in several fanfics Fire is just an extension of violence and violence is always the answer.
It's actually a rather brilliant way to turn Fluttershy alicorn. I can actually see Discord thinking, 'well, if it worked for ole' sparkle-butt...' because of course he wants to spend forever with his best friend, mortality and the natural order be damned. He is Discord after all. And this story really did celebrate both Discord and his friendship with Fluttershy.
Fluttershy is, as she often is whenever the writers don't deem it fit to play up her character flaws, utterly unflappable throughout all of this. Discord is being Discord, which is always great, and then you've got Twilight, who learns some very important lessons about objective morality. Lessons which she has been needing for a while now. I also like the idea of Fluttershy spending a season as some kind of 'Princess of Chaos', filling in for Discord while he recovers. It's interesting because she's pretty much the last person you'd expect to become an avatar of Chaos, but also considering how well she gets on with Discord you can actually kind of see it.
Kudos on the last scene with Fluttershy giving Applejack's orchard legs because she thought Applejack was being rude and/or mean to them. As that sounds exactly like something Fluttershy would do with Discord's powers.
Miss Applejack,
We here at Equestrian Child Protective Services have decided to remove one Apple Bloom from your care as you have been found unsuited to her care. We would also like to inform you that the local Health & Safety Executive would like to discuss with you the required training for operating and maintaining an Apple Orchard/Farm/Agricultural Business.
Thank you for your time,
Good Day.
PS:
Bugglit. Millennium hand and shrimp.
8702158
Hexanitrohexaazaisowurtizane in chloroflouroazide?
Are we going to have the comments about dimethylmercury and FOOF again? ( https://www.fimfiction.net/story/156048/2/obiter-dicta/an-afternoon-for-dotted-line )
8702558 *drinks a bottle of dimethyl mercury* Mmmm...tangy. What were saying?
This was a well-written story, but I honestly didn't think it was that funny. The only laugh I got out of this was from the beavers pulling out chainsaws.
(sees title, instantly thinks of Gandalf's conversation with Galadriel in "The Hobbit")
Because anything that selects Pinkie Pie as one of its champions is clearly a force of law.
Remember, Discord explicitly introduced himself as "Spirit of Chaos and Disharmony." They're separate concepts, and logically so are Order and Harmony. Harmony isn't mindless clockwork but the machine that is more than the sum of its parts. There certainly is such a thing as too much Harmony: groupthink, blissed-out passivity, tradition for tradition's sake, and so forth. But homogeneity? Not so much.
Aside from that conceptual pet peeve, this was a fun story. I do love seeing the rest of the Mane Six ascend, and this was definitely a fun adventure. Just be careful what you conflate in the future.
8704320
However who called the tree the tree of harmony ?
In this universe supposedly the royal sisters. Discord did stuff waay out of the order spectrum so the Tree of Order doing its work seemed like going towards harmony.
8703631
accodring to somewhere on the internet (maybe film theory) it's that the ring is most dangerous in powerful hands therefor giving it to a hobbit -not a being of power- would make it easier to contain.
8704388
I reiterate: Pinkie Pie. No avatar of order worth its right angles would give that mare so much as the time of day, much less an artifact of unfathomable power. To say nothing of Rainbow "My tortoise is totally worth industrial sabotage" Dash.
Very good, not counting some minor mistakes. Have a like.
The whole story was so random but not random enough that i couldn't follow it. The whole thing was funny i like the part when fluttershy burst out of the castle and turned a cloud pink and it rained chocolate milk that was hilarious. At least in the end everything worked out.
There's only one word to describe this fic. That was absolutely....
media1.tenor.com/images/fc5e8cba1393ee09a11a702e6917ddf2/tenor.gif?itemid=10188468
Good form. I like it.
8704320
You're definitely right that Order and Chaos are separate from Harmony (or Discord). Harmony is about things coming together amplifying each other, Discord is about things falling apart and interfering. Those are both necessary things, but they're both ASPECTS of Order and Chaos rather than the whole.
That said, this story was fun so I'm quite happy to roll with it.
That was good. Fluttershy doesn't get her day in the sun as the hero that often, and the slightly Pinkie-ish chaotic alicorn version of her was fun. It felt a bit like Andrea Libman joke.
Robin Williams.
Remember him.
I really love the idea of Fluttershy being the Alicorn of Chaos. It's like Princess Big Mac, you never expect to see it coming.
I genuinely laughed out loud at this; it's just so perfectly Fluttershy.
I've reviewed your story HERE!
8791173
But we already have a Princess of Chaos. Behold:
derpicdn.net/img/view/2017/8/9/1506294__safe_artist-colon-tonyfleecs_pinkie+pie_spoiler-colon-comic_spoiler-colon-comic57_adventure+in+the+comments_alicorn_alicornified_equestria+is+.jpeg
9052597
It's glorious!
I’m skipping ahead to comment, long before finishing the story, because I had to get this down while I remembered.
Several months after Aragon’s contest ended, I’ve spent the day catching up on some of the winning stories. The two I’ve already read were great stories, both very enjoyable, moving, well-written etc. But they were funny in that ‘yes, this snarky banter is amusing’ way, or ‘I appreciate the irony of the outcome being the total opposite of what the character was trying to achieve.’ I smiled quite a bit, but I don’t think I actually laughed out once.
Your story just made me laugh. And I’ve only read the first three sentences.
This was brilliant. I laughed so very many times
I think, between this and Before Beanis, you’re one of the funniest writers on the site
This idea is really good. Do you have plan to apply this approach to the rest of the Mane 6?
What a punchline. XD
Now that's comedy! :3
You have officially written the only way I will accept Fluttershy being called 'butter-colored'.
Pretty funny fic! I got a lot of enjoyment out of it.
My muffins need me!
Wow. Interesting one.