Epileptic-autistic eldest of four, artist, creative, and horse crazy girl who is obsessed with entertainment media and history among other things.
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Apple Bloom, now a teenager, falls head over heels for a Strawberry named Strawbert. Will their love survive or will it be forever forbidden by their big sisters, Applejack and Strawberry Sunrise?
PS: Fully aware cutie mark isn't show accurate
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Your stories are all telling and no showing. You're telling me all about their day in a couple seconds and only show a glimpse of a conversation from that day. Where's the story here?
Thanks for the advice, I'll keep it in mind for the upcoming chapters.
The plot itself is interesting, and Strawbert is an interesting OC, but I just can't enjoy the story at it's fullest potential without you showing, rather than telling, which is what you've been doing.
Actually Applejack doesn't hate strawberries, but its your story.
8362814
It's a story with a moral, you shouldn't hate someone just because you have differing opinions, hence the setup.
8363348
I didn't mean for my comment to sound mean i apologize for that, and I do like the story,
Kind of rushed but interesting concept. At least give a description of the guy.
If this is all after honest apple then why would applejack force apple bloom away from a guy just because of his sister's opinion? His sister's opinion may not even be his own and on the Strawberry side of things they or at least Sunrise doesn't seem to care about a different pony's taste so why would she care if her brother was dating an apple anyway?
He admits that feud is silly, but how does he feel about eating Apples. ( Not a euphemism )
8502736
Your mind goes to some dark places Cyndaquil. Stop taking a teenager based romance fic seriously.
8502765
Actually, i just looked at my comment and choice of smirking avatar and worried that everyone would think I was going there.
I meant does Strawbert like the taste of literal apples and apple flavoured commercial products.
That's what the feud is about, right?
I wouldn't take it seriously, except I'm meant to believe that the characters do.
8503996
He just enjoys literal orchard-grown apples. Yeah. That's what the feud is about.