Right Here, Right Now
Another slow day at Ponyville’s premiere pastry shop, Sugarcube Corner, was drifting by especially slow for the bright pink pony tending the cash register. For Pinkie Pie, what with her combination of bright, exuberant energy, and her tendency to help herself to the plethora of treats that the Cakes baked each and every day, it wasn’t her style to simply stand around and watch the clock. She made this painfully obvious by constantly fidgeting, hopping from one hoof to another, and tapping rhythms not even Vinyl Scratch could hope to follow.
Finally, after what felt like an eternity to Pinkie (but was actually 10 minutes), Applejack nudged the door open to the bakery, the bell above the door tinkling merrily at the prospect of a sale. Pinkie Pie immediately lit up, a smile crossing her face as her orange apple-bucking friend made her way up to the counter.
“Well, howdy, Pinkie! Not used to seein’ you behind the counter!” Applejack said pleasantly, giving her friend a smile.
“Hi A.J.! Oh my gosh, I KNOW, right? I don’t think I’m out for this, I’ve just been standing here and I’ve been SOOOOOO bored and I keep telling myself I can’t eat any more of the treats because the Cake’s said I’d had enough and they’re right, I have, but they all just look so goooooooood an-“
“Ahmm… Pinkie?” Applejack said, her smile now one of awkward waiting.
“Oh, right… -ahem- Welcome to Sugarcube Corner!” Pinkie said in her best official-sounding voice. “What can I gethcha?”
“I’d like a cupcake, please. I’m bringin’ it home for Applebloom. It’s her birthday tomorrow and all, y’know.” Applejack said, smiling at her friend genuinely once again.
Pinkie Pie let out one of her signature gasps, rising a few feet in the air as she did so. “OHMIGOSH, IT IS!” Pinkie Pie said, unable to hold in her excitement. “OH, I NEED TO THROW HER A PARTY! THERE’LL BE CAKE AND BALLOONS AND ICE CREAM AND MUSIC AND ALL OF MY FRIENDS WILL BE THERE~!”
Applejack simply stood aside while Pinkie went through her mental checklist of things she’d need for Applebloom’s party. When Pinkie was finally done, Applejack simply glanced downward and said “Aw, that’s mighty nice of ya’, Pinkie, and normally, I’d be coming to you to throw little Applebloom a party any day, but times’ve been hard this season. We haven’t been turning quite the profit that we usually do during Applebuck Season.
Seeing her friend was down was enough to instantly bring Pinkie down, especially Applejack.
Wait, why especially Applejack? Pinkie thought to herself.
Pinkie took a look at the orange mare. She was idly standing there, her eyes focused on the floor, and thought for a moment. Finally, she simply dismissed the stray thought, and focused on the present again. Pinkie took Applejack’s hoof inbetween in her own, surprised by its warmth. Pinkie’s heart hopped, skipped, and jumped, and then went into overdrive, beating madly.
Now since when have I noticed a thing like that? And what happened to my heart…? It feels funny...
“Well, AJ, I’ll tell you what. Since it’s just for you…. I’ll do it for free!”
Applejack’s eyes widened, looking at the pink party pony with a mixture of shock and sudden happiness.
“Aw shucks, Pinkie… You don’ have to do that…” Applejack said, looking away from Pinkie Pie, a slight line of red appearing across her muzzle due to the fact that her friend had unexpectedly taken her hoof.
Pinkie Pie looked down, suddenly realizing what she had done, and quickly dropped Applejack’s hoof with a sheepish grin. Applejack let out a little chuckle.
“Well, maybe I don’t have to, but I WANT to. Especially for you, A.J.”
“Aw, well thank’ya kindly. Pinkie Pie. But what do you mean “Especially for you?”. Applejack asked, looking at the pink pony questioningly.
Yeah, what did you mean? Thought Pinkie’s traitorous mind.
“Oh, I uh… I just meant… ‘cause you’re my friend! You know I love to make my friends smile!” Pinkie Pie said quickly, a bead of sweat forming on her forehead above where her wild, untamed mane covered it. She begged Celestia that it not drop too low. Pinkie was feeling uncomfortably hot all of the sudden, and she wasn’t sure why.
“Ahhh. Well, that’s still might kind of ‘ya, Pinkie! Thank y’all."
Applejack suddenly wrapped her arms around her party-loving pal, pulling her into a hug. Pinkie’s temperature rose another 10 degrees and her heart started beating 10 times harder. She felt it soar up to her throat like a scared Pegasus, causing her to release a “hurck” sound as A.J. squeezed her. The apple-loving pony didn’t notice. Finally, Applejack released Pinkie, who didn’t understand how Applejack could be so nonchalant.
I’ll just be takin’ my cupcake now, if ‘ya don’t mind.” A.J. said to the stunned-to-silence pony, who took a moment to register what had just been said.
Pinkie breathed a mental sigh of relief, glad she wouldn’t have to mask her sudden discomfort much longer.
“Oh, right!” Pinkie Pie handed A.J. the cupcake she had requested, and A.J. plinked a shiny gold coin on the counter.
Pinkie Pie waved goodbye to her friend as she exited the pastry shop, collapsing onto the counter in a heap, panting, a bead of sweat streaking its way down her face.
What just happened to me?
Why A.J.?
Why now?
Why does my forehead hurt?
Pinkie Pie jerked up, and saw that the bit Applejack had used to pay for the cupcake was gone. Suddenly, something plinked onto the floor with a -ting-. Pinkie looked down and realized she had collapsed right onto the bit. She giggled to herself, snatching it up and tossing it into the cash register before returning to her vigilant post, not to receive another customer that night. She only thought of her friend occasionally.
Finally, it was closing time. Pinkie Pie was less tired than she normally would have been, and this only allowed her thoughts to race more as she mentally reviewed the events of her day while lying in bed, staring up at the ceiling of her bedroom.
She couldn’t stop thinking about her fellow earth pony friend, Applejack. For as long as she could remember, she had never felt anything for Applejack like what she felt today. She couldn’t remember ever bonding with A.J. that way, although of course she loved her friend very much. But not… at least, she thought not, in that way…
I wonder if I was just going crazy from having to stand still all day...
As if in a retaliating response, Pinkie’s ever-traitorous mind suddenly pulled up a vivid image of her grabbing A.J.’s hoof, and how warm it had felt, and how unexpectedly soft her fur was, for her being a hardworking pony.
Why am I thinking about this? Is there something wrong with me?
The normally exhuberant party pony was overcome with a feeling she couldn’t even begin to understand.
I’ve never felt this way. Not even that time I ate 30 cupcakes and I literally climbed the walls like a spider! My tummy feels hurty, like I ate too many sweets… But in a good way. Like I don’t mind if it hurts…
And then Pinkie remembered when A.J. had pulled her in the hug. Normally, it was Pinkie Pie who was being random and spontaneous, but in that situation, she’d felt completely switched around. Nopony had ever done that to Pinkie Pie… Why could Applejack in less than 30 minutes?
For a while, Pinkie simply laid, thinking about Applejack. She was honest, simple, hardworking… Every bit as kind as Fluttershy, as loyal as Dashie, as generous as Rarity, and as wise as Twilight, though maybe not as book-smart. When Pinkie stopped and thought about it, she realized that Applejack really would make a great… fillyfriend.
Fillyfriend? What am I even saying? And why would A.J. ever wanna be with me, anyhow? Stop being silly, Pinkie!
Pinkie rolled over and tried to get to sleep. Her head would have none of it, though.
But what if she did? It’s not like you’ve had much of a relationship with a colt before, and if every day with Applejack could feel like today…
Pinkie Pie thought about that… If every day could make her feel like what Applejack had made her feel today. It was that warm, fuzzy feeling that finally allowed her the comfort of sleep.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The next day was bright and beautiful as any other day, a perfect day for a little filly to have a party. And wasn’t it just Pinkie Pie’s luck, she’d be spending the day at Sweet Apple Acres, home of Applejack and the rest of the Apples, to prepare the party. Pinkie arrived early, her party cannon and several other things in tow.
Applejack opened the door upon the second knock, smiling when she saw it was her friend Pinkie.
“Well hi, Pinkie! Shucks, ah still can’t thank y’all enough fer doin’ this. Lil’ Applebloom-
“Ah AIN’T little, ah'm 13!” came a voice from the den.
Applejack let out a sigh, but the smile on her face suggested she didn’t really mind, as she turned back to Pinkie.
“… APPLEBLOOM couldn’t be more thankful. And ah couldn’t either. You’re great, Pinkie.”
“Awww, it’s nothing’, Applejack!” Pinkie said, thankful she was naturally pink, so light blushing didn’t affect her much. She did her best to stay like the Pinkie Pie everyone knew and loved, for all of their sakes.
Pinkie began setting up the decorations around the barn behind Sweet Apple Acres, her party cannon at full power as banners, balloons, streamers, and party favors flew amongst the hay and sunbeams, covering the rafters and makeshift tables. A large, rectangular table sat near the back, a punch bowl and a large, round cake with yellow frosting and red icing that proclaimed brightly “HAPPY BIRTHDAY, APPLEBLOOM!”. As always, it was promising to be another Pinkie Party to remember.
An hour later, the guests had arrived and the party was in full swing. The Cutie Mark Crusaders were dancing up a storm together, Applebloom wearing a specially designed party hat made by Pinkie herself, while Pinkie, Applejack, and their 4 other friends were gathered away from the mayhem the CMC were leaving behind.
“Great party, Pinkie!” Rainbow Dash said, taking a generous sip of punch from her glass.
“I agree, the décor is simply marvelous!” Rarity chimed in.
“Applebloom must be so happy you did all of this for her!” Twilight said, beaming at Pinkie, who was happily bouncing around to the music.
“Aw, you should’a seen her face last night, girls.” Applejack said fondly, watching her little sister cut a rug a little ways off. “’Pinkie Pie is the best pony ever!’ She said.”
All of the ponies a’wwed in unison, even Rainbow Dash, who normally wasn’t one to get sappy.
Fluttershy piped up “Oh my, Pinkie, I don’t know how you always manage to throw such great parties, even on such short notice.”
“It’s not so hard, especially when you’ve got a party cannon!” Pinkie said, motioning to her prized mobile discotheque.
Applejack trotted over to Pinkie Pie, her hoof reaching out for Pinkie’s. As soon as they touched, Pinkie jumped slightly, like she’d been shocked. Applejack, unnoticing as ever, lifted her hoof up, Pinkie growing more nervous by the minute.
“Really, though, Sugarcube. I can’t thank you enough for what you’ve done.” Applejack whispered to her friend. “C’mere, let’s get away from the other girls for a minute, I have something I wanna give ‘ya fer yer troubles.”
Pinkie Pie’s heart was now going impossibly fast, jumping as hard as she had been only moments ago as she danced along with the music. She swallowed heavily, sweat once again forming on her, as she followed Applejack out of the barn and to the west side.
Oh, I wonder what A.J.’s gonna be giving me? Pinkie’s mind fluttered with vivid possibilities that seemed endless, but none of which seemed likely. Still, the pony couldn’t help but hope that at least one of her many fantasies would come true.
Applejack, once outside, turned back to face Pinkie, taking a moment to pause and examine her.
“You alright there, Sugarcube? You look.... Tense…”
“Oh, who, me? I’m fine! Just eager to partaaay, is all!” Pinkie said, trying her best to mask her true feelings, and doing a bad job.
“Alrighty, if you say so. Anyhow, Applebloom had something she wanted to give ya, and she entrusted me to give it to ya.” Applejack said, taking off her hat.
Pinkie couldn’t hide her feelings of disappointment very well, as she felt her heart sink to back where it belonged. She did her best to put on her mask for Applejack, for little Applebloom’s sake.
“Awww, that sure was nice of her! What’d she make me?”
Applejack handed Pinkie an envelope. Inside was a bright pink card, which, upon opening, revealed a crudely drawn picture of Applebloom, Pinkie Pie, and Applejack holding hands, with the words “Pinkie Pie: Honorary member of the Apple family!”, with the signatures of all four occupants of Sweet Apple Acres below.
Pinkie felt tears welling up in her eyes, and she looked up at Applejack, who just smiled.
“We thought you’d like it, Sugarcube.” She said, holding her hat against her chest. Reaching her hoof out, she placed her hat on Pinkie’s head. “Welcome to the family, Sugarcube.” A.J. chuckled. “Say, my hat looks pretty good on ya, Pinkie.”.
A million different thoughts bombarded Pinkie all at once, a thousand different calls to action urging her muscles forward, backward, upward, anywhere but exactly where she was. In then end, though, the call that won was the call to move closer.
So Pinkie did. She moved until her lips were against Applejack’s, and suddenly they were kissing, kissing even though they were just friends, even though mare’s weren’t supposed to kiss eachother, kissing even though… Even though Pinkie didn’t know if Applejack felt the same…
And then Pinkie broke away, the dam breaking as tears finally began streaking down her usually smiling face, her mouth tasting slightly of apples and her eyes stinging.
Applejack opened her mouth to try to speak, but before she could say anything, Pinkie was running, running away from the party, from her friends, from everything. Applejack’s hat stayed on her head the entire journey home to Sugarcube Corner, and teardrops lined the path behind her. When she first galloped away, she thought she heard a familiar voice yell to her “Pinkie, wait!”. She chose to ignore it.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Pinkie Pie sat alone in her darkened room at Sugarcube Corner. Applejack’s hat sat in her hooves, and Pinkie sat on her floor, caressing the hat, learning its every feel and fold while she could. She knew the hat was precious to A.J., and therefore, it was precious to her, too.
She didn’t know how much time had gone by before she heard the squeaking of the door downstairs. Once again, she chose blissful ignorance over curiosity, and stayed still in the dark, with only a memento of one of her best friends for company.
I messed up… She thought. Why did I do that? Why, of all the things I could have done, did I do that?
Because you wanted to She replied to herself.
Well, duh! But I shouldn’t have. I’ve ruined our friendship. Maybe… forever…
Pinkie thought that she had exhausted her reserve of tears, but even more somehow managed to fall and gently plop on her bedroom floor, leaving dark spots. Pinkie wallowed in her own misery for a few moments, until she heard footsteps coming up the stairs and down the hall.
“Pinkie?” She heard someone say in a familiar Southern drawl.
She sniffled a few times before gaining her composure.
“I-i-in here.” She said.
Applejack wandered in, looking at the dejected little pony sitting on the floor with a mixture of sadness and surprise.
“I guess you came back for your hat?” Pinkie said, holding it out in an attempt to give it back.
“No, ah didn’t. I came for something’ far more important than that.” Applejack said, sitting down next to Pinkie.
“If not that, what?”
“Ain’t it obvious, Pinkie? You!”
Pinkie Pie looked at Applejack with surprise.
“But why?”
“Because you’re mah best friend, you… you silly filly!” Applejack said, coaxing Pinkie to turn her frown upside down, like she knew Pinkie would do for her.
“Yeah, I know, but… but I… I did that thing…” Pinkie said, looking away from A.J.
Applejack just looked ahead, not trying to make eye contact, and said “Well… I told the other girls to keep an eye on Applebloom and the gang while I went after ‘ya. So I had plenty of time to think on my way here. Think about the fact that you and I are pretty much polar opposites. You love havin’ fun and bein’ carefree, and me… Well, I like the simple things and workin’ hard. I’ve been thinkin’ about that a lot lately. That’s why I randomly hugged ya’ yesterday. I know bein’ random is usually your thing. Another thing that makes us different.
But… I guess that sometimes two things that don’t seem like they’d go good together end up doin’ just that, ‘cause… They balance eachother out. Like…
“Like what?” Pinkie asked, now looking up and at Applejack’s face.
Applejack turned and gave Pinkie a smile.
“Like… Apple pie.”
Pinkie couldn’t help but giggle now.
“Hahahah! That’s like our two names together!” Pinkie said, her smile that everypony so loved finally returned to her face.
Applejack chuckled. “Heh… Yeah. Yeah, I suppose it is.”
Pinkie looked down at Applejack’s hat.
“I guess you’ll be wanting this back now?”
“Nah, you can hold on to it for a little while. I’ve got somethin’ even better.”
“And what’s that?” Pinkie asked curiously.
Applejack didn’t answer; instead, she simply set her hat on Pinkie’s head, and then kissed her with all the force she could muster. Pinkie was taken aback at first, but she wouldn’t even begin to think about fighting it. She simply enjoyed the few breathtaking moments she was spending with Applejack, right there, and right now.
Just the way Pinkie liked her apple pie.
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GONNA START READING NOAWWWW
Not a fan of shipping, but i still enjoyed it. It was cute.
lounge.moviecodec.com/images/attachment/do-wnat-kind-of-want-and-do-not-want-1083.png
904734
David Tennant?
ALL OF MY WANT.
d'awwwwwww
My comment would be deleted if i gave you the correct amount of Fluttersy's
Its with great sadness i can only give you one
911367
The first thing my mind said was "WOULD IT BE OVER 9,000!?"
I ASTOUND myself with my level of maturity sometimes
Thank you!
911376
The amount would be so great that nasa would have to hire Goku to buy Intel, merge with Nividia, then ask them to develop a super computer that was cooled by outer space to give an answer that would take 99 years to calculate
911389
"... years to calculate..."
Done!
Ermahgerd dis gon b dabes fanfiction evar.
911392
I think ima find another fanfic
>.>
911395
One could hardly blame you
That right there was a cute story. Good AJ/Pinkie interactions made for a good shipping.
911406
Thank'ya kindly
2012Sorching summer comes, in order to thank everyone, characteristic, novel style, varieties, low price and good quality, and the low sale price. Thank everyone
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A very well written story! Me likey!
911471
Thanks!
911468
DAYYYYUUUUUMMMMM SON
GOTTA STOCK UP ON MY FLY-ASS GUCCI, F'REALZ
I could see a sequel to this where Apple and Pinkie reveal thier feelings to the rest of the group but this is a very good story, well done
-Mr. Carnage
911539
Thank you, Mr. Carnage. I'm a big fan of your work in Spider-Man
911556 HAHA
Your comment made me laugh, the name was inspired by that character but it's actually the name of an original character in my story 'my little Pony: Friendship is Murder' look it up if you have the time or Applebloom might cry
I kid but again good story, I hardly ever see Applejack and Pinkie Pie pairing
-Mr. Carnage
911567
I shall now!
Edit: A DR. WHO FIMFIC?
You sir, are a winner, and you should feel awesome.
Don't think I've read any Apple Pie before; it was a nice change
Very cute story, and well written. It would help with the flow a bit to have small numbers ("10 minutes", "4 other friends", etc) spelled out ("ten minutes", "four other friends"), but that's the only thing that even vaguely distracted me from the d'awws.
911582
You can thank the artist of the picture I used for why I love Apple Pie so much. She made a believer outta me! I might go back and revise the numbers. Thanks for the tip!
Heh, thanks
*Looks at cover* D'awwwwww. Pinkie is adorable when she wears AJ's hat.
I'm gonna read now.
*Reads story* That was adorable and has so much win
911666
Thanks, I'm glad you liked it
Wonderful and adorable, ThatHandsomeDevil. Gold star for you. dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Bonbon_grin.png
911754
For me!?
Now I've got one more than Tyrone!
media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ljhmt5WibI1qd1bzb.png
He really needs to get it together...
911763
Tyrone. dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Cheerilee.png
As sweet as ApplePie. That sums up this story.
914383
ascendancy.net/arashi/Ponies/Oh_you.png
LOVED IT
Actually now my favorite Mane 6 ship, A MILLION THUMBS FOR YOU
~*~*NOW AND FOREVER*~*~
91597
Oh wow, really? Well, it's my favorite, too, so welcome to the club!
Beginning was kinda meh, moving pretty fast. Middle was good especially the letter/drawing from Applebloom. That was just d'awwwws all over. The drama bit was so-so, nothing unexpected and the ending was bad. I'll elaborate a little as to be fair and not leave you in the dark.
Anyone can comment like the above, but only reasoned criticism has any real value.
I'll skip to the parts I didn't like as much though. What's good doesn't need much or any improvement amirite?
So, the drama bit where Pinkie Pie simply ran off and Applejack went after her, it's exactly what we'd expect. I'm not reading anything new and this may put people off because they'll feel like they're reading something for the billionth time. I know it's fun to write it and that's also why it's been written so often. It has its appeals. But the "clichéness" if you will, is also a turn off for some people (like me). That was the so-so bit.
The ending I found to be bad. The foremost reason being that we don't get enough info on Applejacks side. That is, unless we take the earlier body language and hints to extends that are not really called for from the context of the story. At least, to me it didn't. Applejack had no reason whatsoever to kiss Pinkie Pie for what I got from the story up to that point. And that's really the biggest issue right there (for me).
To leave on a positive note, I like your style somewhat. Your grammar is sound and you use some words I don't see to often. This is appealing to me. The pacing is consistent though a little rushed overall. All 'n all a good concept and judging by the likes/dislikes, it must be me, not the story.
Also, the 4th wall breaches were a nice touch. Really.
I clicked this story because I like ApplePie shipping and because the story has high ratings. So I hope my critique can inspire you to write more and better stories
Regards,
FHB
918176
Thank you very much for the constructive criticism. I know I cannot please every fanfiction reader when I write a story, and I thank you for pointing out what you had problems with. I can see how Applejack's sudden decision to kiss Pinkie would seem rash, but the reason I had her do it was because, as she had said, the things Pinkie had been making her feel didn't make sense to her, either, and made her act just as random as Pinkie can.
The ending/middle is very cliched, which is why I'm kind of disappointed in it, looking back. However, for the life of me, I couldn't think of anything better. Even though it's cliched, it seemed nice to me, and very cute, so I couldn't help but write it. As much as I'd like to think of something better, I haven't yet evolved that much as a writer.
Nevertheless, I will definitely take what you've said into account when I continue to write, and, again, thanks for elaborating on what you didn't like
Cheers!
918213
Don't mention it
Like I said, you did it because it works and yes it is cute 'n all. I totally understand. And looking at the likes, I don't think a lot of people will mind
I did notice indeed your bit on explaining Applejacks part, but it was kinda telling vs showing.
See this piece of 6 second irony: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sFBhR4QcBtE
I think that if you were to elaborate more on Applejack, this story would improve a lot. You keep telling us how Pinkie gets bodily reactions (heart pounding, mind racing) to thoughts and senses of Applejack, yet we don't get to see the reverse. Applejack totally seems a friend, completely neutral on the loving relationship part. That was what I think I missed the most. It would make the story more complete.
Anyway, if you ever need a proofread of an ApplePie again you can ask me.
I'll read ApplePie stories just from that premise 
918275
Thank you, I very much appreciate the offer
One more question: Why'd you watch me?
Not that I'm complaining at all! It just seems sorta strange since you found flaws in my story.
918294
I'm kinda new to this site so I thought that would be the way for me to remind me to read this story later without faving it.
I just don't know what went wrong.
Basically,
Also, stories with flaws are the ones we all can learn from.
918341
Ahhh, alrighty xD Welp, in case no one has done it yet...
WELCOME WELCOME WELCOME, A FINE WELCOME TO YOU!
Applejack's hat must have magic aphrodisiac powers
Eh... This was an okay shipfic. I think FreeHomeBrew's first comment accurately summarizes my thoughts, and saves me a lot of time on this damn iPod keyboard.
Yeessss!!!! A decent Applepie. *thumb up*
We need more of these!!
Great fic. Made me feel all happy. You have done a great service to mankind my friend.
When applejack comes in the first time pinkie say I'm not out for this you missed the word (cut)
Otherwise I dawwwed so much loved it
This is as sweet as... as sweet as...
...some kind of pastry, with a fruit filling.
I'm gonna say a cherry strudel. This is as sweet as a cherry strudel.
Okay, okay, serious face now. I realize I won't be saying much by saying this is the best ApplePie fic I've read on the site, but hey, it's true. Your mechanics are pretty solid (I half-noticed a couple little errors, but they weren't glaring enough to stop and take note of what they were). And Applebloom's drawing is a very heartwarming moment. This was a very sweet little shipping fic.
That said, it's fairly forgettable. Without anything providing any real tension in the plot, the payoff at the end just doesn't feel like it has been earned. There is only one point in the story where there is even any pretense of doubt that the couple in question will end up together--I speak of Pinkie running away from the party here--and it is unfortunately the most poorly handled part of the story.
Now, this is my one point of contention with Free Home Brew's critique, as I don't think the problem is that it is a cliche. Lots of things are cliches, but can work if they are done well enough. No, the problem is that we aren't given sufficient reason for Pinkie Pie to run away. Give us a look of confusion on Applejack's face, or some other cue that will put us readers in the mindset that Pinkie is in at that point, thinking that she has gone and messed up somehow. Have something go wrong with the party somehow, making Pinkie nervous that AJ would be disappointed in her over it. The more doubt you cast over whether this could possibly end happy, the greater the release will be when, in the end, the happy ending finally does come. This is true for all stories, not just shipping, but romance fics tend to get tripped up on this more often than others.
On the subject of the ending, it would be nice to get just a little bit longer of a resolution. After the dust has settled, it's okay to have a bit of ponies cuddling, walking around town, or eating delicious pastries together. That is what we sat down to read a ship fic in order to see, after all. "Okay we're dating now, bye!" is not very satisfying.
I hope to see more from you. (I especially hope to see more ApplePie from you!) Keep writing, and good luck!
1178421
Even though you are correct in saying it doesn't mean much. ApplePie doesn't get shipped nearly as much as I'd like.
Wow, thank you VERY much for the review! I can't really think of anything to say that I haven't already said before to someone that has given their opinion on my story, but thank you for pointing out what you liked and didn't like. I'm always happy to learn what I can do to improve my writing. I feel that my writing has been suffering lately, and I've been meaning for so long to update stories, so perhaps it's about time I got back in the swing of things. Getting praise like having what someone considers the best ApplePie shipfic sure does help
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Great! Just great!
newnation.sg/wp-content/uploads/07-so-much-win.jpg nuff said.
Dat fic.
904753 Here you go then
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And my reaction to the fic?
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Everyone likes some apple pie
The ending was really nice.
d'aww
Such a short, sweet ApplePie.
