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A collection of short Equestria Girls fics, lovingly handcrafted for your reading pleasure.
Prepare to be disappointed. Updated whenever I feel like it.
Pinkie Pie Hijacks an Entenmann's Truck: Pretty much a bog-standard Pony does X story here.
Derpy Steals a Muffin Truck: Again . . . title says it all.
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Truly the greatest tragedy of our time.
Though this is consequence-free magical
horsegirl land. She can probably exchange it for the truck she wanted.I think the delivery driver got the better end of this deal.
Poor Derp's.
Truly no one cares what the CHS student body gets up.
Sonata's tag line is glorious.
Well...that's not completely useless. I mean, slide some sausage, egg, and cheese on one of those things, you have a tasty breakfast...
I mean, silver lining and all, right?
I can't believe that you got away with that line in a Teen rated story.
Aww... if Flash is feeling left out, he should steal a General Motors vehicle transporter. (Provided nobody steals a wood chipper first...)
(I am reminded of this video...)
Muffins can give them to that nice teacher Doctor.
8361722
But he already has his own pilfered Jelly Baby truck. (Or "lorry." Whatever.)
c2.staticflickr.com/4/3476/3220858366_bed2b50ca9_z.jpg?zz=1
Do the quotation marks around that No look weird to anyone else?
Well, she can use them to bake pizza muffins! Still salvageable!
Hm...
I was expecting a scene where the truck driver takes the vespa, and comes back filthy rich.
Booo
You missed a golden opportunity here for it to be an undercover FBI van parked whilst they investigate the mysterioslus delivery truck heists plaguing the town of magical girl land.
8361420
I think so, too. Apparently there are people in the comments who like Entenmann's, although for the life of me, I can't figure out why.
8361966
I typed it on my laptop that's got the iffy shift key. Ever since it got a bath, it hasn't worked as well as it ought to.
8363751
Maybe he used it to hijack a Krispy Kreme truck.
8361379
I know, right?
There's actually a pretty good chance of that, to be honest.
8361424
They don't! Demons and ancient evils ravish the school whenever the plot demands; why would they worry about a parking lot full of delivery trucks?
You know damn well you'd buy a taco off that truck.
8361428
That's fine for some
poniespeople, but I don't think that would be a proper breakfast for Derpy.i.pinimg.com/736x/bd/e8/13/bde813f03bddb2a126aa51c738042906--ponies-my-little-pony.jpg
8361463
What? It's technically non-sexual. If anyone interpreted that way (and I assume everyone did), that's hardly my fault, now is it?
One of our jokes in one stunt show I'm in is "If your kids got that joke, it's not our fault!" Said by the whole cast, in unison.
8361530
Flash is such a good guy, he never would. He (and Snails) are probably the only students who didn't. Maybe Sunset, now that she's reformed.
And he reminds me of this video, which I love very much:
Even though it's not exactly related.
(pretty sure there's a PMV of it, obviously with Twilight)
8361722
They'd probably go well with his tea, wouldn't they?
8361787
8362184
Mmm, pizza muffins. That sounds good!
8363757
I was considering other heists. Applejack doesn't steal an apple truck, because they already have one on the farm. Fluttershy steals the dog catcher's paddy wagon, and adopts all the dogs therein. Rarity steals a fabric truck. Tree Hugger steals a pot truck, and is disappointed when it contains actual pots. And of course, Twilight steals a peach truck.
But I'm not sure that I really need to continue the franchise, y'know?
8368461
I would steal the damn truck and its driver to boot.
8368473
That phrase is also said by the performers at King Richard's Faire, a very nice Ren Faire that takes place for 8 weekends in September & October in Carver, MA.
8368486
Oh? But I see an incomplete tag there.
I really like all of those ideas. I think you could probably continue it, or even get community additions. Does Octavia steal a truck of chellos? Does Vinyl steal a boat-load of doughnuts?
What if Cheerilee stole Applejack's Apple Truck with Big Mac inside?
8369798
It's like all the other "Not Another" stories that I have--I'll add stuff when I think of it, but there's no overarching plan. It's just a collection of shorts.
What if Big Mac stole Applejack's Apple Truck with a cardboard cutout of Twilight Sparkle inside?
i.imgur.com/mIH8A.png
8368522
I would, too.
8369282
I'm sure we're not the first theatre group to come up with it. And it is a good phrase.
I love all of the cultural disconnects at work, though it's hard for me to imagine any instance of Rarity saying "just the right amount of slutty." Also, it's a shame we'll never know the results of the experiment, though given how Twilight went home in her prom dress in the first movie, it seems like the answer will be "whatever you're wearing is lost to the swirling madness between worlds." No word on what happens to the default outfit though...
What? I'm with Twilight on this one. Science is the most interesting thing you can do with clothes.
Huh. I would have expected a slightly mean prank like that from Dash. Not Pinkie.
Well I think Rarity needs to dress her friends up in something very embarrassing over this.
If I were explaining pajamas to Twilight, I'd just say that pajamas are less durable and thus more likely to tear or rip if worn outside the home.
And here I was expecting a crossover with Kamen Scooter
9057899
Cultural disconnects is why I write HiE and PoE.
Also, pony-Rarity literally has bondage gear on display at her boutique. Like, that’s canon.
derpicdn.net/img/view/2013/10/22/454478__safe_screencap_rainbow+dash_rarity_twilight+sparkle_swarm+of+the+century_bedroom+eyes_bridle_carousel+boutique_clothes_costume_dress+form_dress.jpg
Seriously, why else would they have bridles?
I like Skywriter’s headcanon that it makes new clothes each time. There was another fic, though, that had Sunset pissed that the Portal had stolen her favorite yoga pants, IIRC. Can’t remember what that one was called.
I’m not sure that I can debate that, especially since the meaning changes depending on how I parse it.
9057944
Although if Pinkie knows that pony-Twilight won’t care, it’s a less mean prank.
Also, I think in the last story I wrote where Pinkie pranked Twilight, she chopped Twilight’s head off.
9057991
She probably will. Although that does beg the question, if the prankee isn’t embarrassed or upset over the prank--just confused--does it really count as being a mean prank?
9058094
That’s a reasonable explanation, although I’m not entirely sure if it’s true in all cases.
It's a simple rule of contextual association, and Twilight should appreciate it for its robustness and simplicity. Clothes that belong to the bedroom should only be worn in the bedroom. An argument can be made for the rest of your dwelling, though that's often skirting lazy and/or rude (and, in the case of sexual items, rather risque). It's as simple as that.
Perhaps it's time for that talk about modesty mentioned earlier... ;]
Hey, as far as I'm concerned, it's a stupid rule too! :D
And no, I'm not just saying that because I'd love to see chicks naked (in fact, I assume it'd get old fairly quickly - nudity leaves nothing to the imagination, I'm afraid).
... besides, I don't think watching grannies walking around in the buff would work wonders for my boners, either...
... aaaand I'm not sure how I might explain myself if I ever got one for a 14yo or something. That'd be just awkward.
9797126
The difficulty to a pony/habitual nudist is what differentiates pajama pants from jogging pants, for example?
Yeah, that’s gonna be a difficult thing for a pony to understand, IMHO.
It really doesn’t.
It’s generally considered poor etiquette, but then that would be something that ponies would understand, since they’d surely have social rules for that kind of thing.
9800616
Again, the idea behind it is simple - contextual association. She doesn't need to understand where it came from, she just needs to understand what it stands for today. Even if she doesn't really grok the idea behind wearing clothes at all, as long as she puts that to rest as "something you just do" (full explanation pending!), it really shouldn't be all that hard to understand what types of clothes go with what types of situations/environments - some of these are quite sharply defined, after all. Everything else can be dealt with fuzzy logic and overlapping sets.
Come on! This is something Twilight would be good at. You just have to find a way to explain it to her in a way that she'll have something to associate the knowledge to in her head - a preexisting nodule of information she can hang this off of.
And, for once, math doesn't seem like a bad idea here. Besides, explaining clothes to Twilight using math sounds hilarious. Tell me it doesn't. ;D
One more point - imperfect understanding + culture clash tends to lead to some... fairly funny, if mildly embarrassing, situations. The "working understanding" Twi would have would, by its very nature, be full of holes - she'd probably be going off of checklists when deciding what to wear based on social, economical and personal preferences... she'd be attaching "meta tags" to different outfits based on their quality, percentage of skin revealed... the works. Though I'd still expect her to get better about it, over time... ;-)
Besides, she's not mute, right? Definitely not blind, either. She can openly (maybe even too openly? heheh) comment on other people's clothing choices... It doesn't have to be touching her specifically to make for good entertainment. ;]
Also, as far as I'm aware (not being one myself), habitual nudists understand perfectly well what clothes are, why they exist, and when to use them. If they didn't, you'd think they'd have issues going to their bank, or the city hall... you know. ;] It's ponies that this might be an issue for, because they wear clothes for very much different reasons. But you have something to work with, here!
Exactly why it's a good thing to write about! :D It's non-trivial, and I'm sure it'd spark some small controversy. People eat that shit up, me included. I'm sure there'd be stuff you'd say that I wouldn't, and stuff I'd say that you won't mention. It's a riot! ;D
9800793
I personally have a hard idea imagining that this is a subject which would pique pony Twilight’s interest. I could see it being something that Rarity would eat up, and maybe Pinkie Pie as well (possibly even Fluttershy), but I just don’t see it being a subject that would interest Twilight. I mean, if it were all that ponies got to know about EqG humans, yeah, she’d absorb it like a sponge, but given the other potentially interesting topics, I don’t see this one being of particular interest. But that’s just me, and you certainly do make some strong arguments.
I honestly can’t disagree with that.
One I remember in A Twilight Landing by Merlos the Mad (sadly, unfinished) was that while Twilight had learned that clothes were required outside the house, she never quite got the hang of needing to wear them inside the house, much to her roommate’s chagrin (as I recall, she would if she was planning to leave her room, but if her roommate knocked, she’d just open the door without putting anything on first).
Somebody on Discord also recently mentioned the idea that since ponies often leave their hindquarters uncovered when they wear clothes, a pony might figure that just a shirt is plenty of coverage for at least causal situations, which could also be reinforced unintentionally by conversation: “It’s a casual affair; a t-shirt will be fine.”
That’s true, although once again I think Twilight would be less likely than other ponies to comment on fashion choices or to make any particular effort to understand them.
Well, sure, in a human society with human rules most people--even habitual nudists--understand the social and legal requirements of putting on clothes before going out in public. I suspect, with no actual evidence, that a real dyed-in-the-wool nudist is going to have less fashion sense than your average person, figuring that if it covers the naughty bits it’s good enough for casual occasions. Also, since you mention the bank and city hall, while we haven’t seen a banker in canon to my knowledge, it appears that the mayor typically goes nude. Certainly their princess does, and they often meet her also nude.
Honestly, that’s something I’ve worked into multiple stories.
Heh, don’t mind me self-advertising here, but if you haven’t read it, you might like my Sam and Rose series, in which clothing or the lack thereof is a running theme. [A Sleeping Rose is first; I’m not sure they’re in that order in the bookshelf.]
Delivery driver definitely got a good deal I'd say. n_n
I do love the idea of a parking lot *full* of delivery trucks. And there used to be a knife/scissor sharpening truck in my hometown, he was pretty handy.
Hahahah poor Rarity. I'd say poor Twilight but she doesn't seem to mind.
11674043
I'd say you're correct. Twilight doesn't get clothes and doesn't understand why everybody thinks its weird to not wear them. Sunset probably had the same hill to climb when she came over to EqG from Equestria.
11674041
That would be such an amazing high school. There was a person in college who occasionally drove a restaurant's publicity van, which had the name of the restaurant in big letters on the roof.
I've never used a sharpening truck, but I could see the advantage of having one around. There is one I see around her occasionally. There's also a mobile pet grooming van I see on occasion.
11674040
Lucky for her the delivery driver was a Vespa fan and also sort of 'meh' about his current job. But that's the thing about Pinkie's plans, they just usually work for the benefit of everyone.
11674960
I remember reading a story that said the elements would grant their bearers extra abilities and Laughter's ability was "Luck". It really does fit n_n