• Member Since 26th Sep, 2011
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FanOfMostEverything


Forget not that I am a derp.

E

Once again, Flash Sentry walked into Twilight Sparkle. However, this time, she was a different Twilight than the one to whom he was accustomed. Sadly, no one thought to tell him that. Now he needs to make it up to this Twilight... assuming he can find her.

And get her to listen to him.

And just how does all of this work, exactly?

(Note: Sunset also makes a significant appearance, but I hit the character tag cap.)

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 65 )

I honestly wonder if they didn't place Flash Sentry between Lyra and Bonbon in all those shots specifically to steal waifu.

Poor Flash. Hated by the fans, and doomed to be a romantic interest in a franchise that denies romantic plots for the main cast on principle. Written with a bland non-threatening personality to participate without challenging anything, he is saddled with the worst of both worlds.

A fun little story ^^

Though, thinking about it, what did it say about her that people being nice to her qualified as a surreal, disturbing experience?

I had the identical thought when I watched Friendship Games. Says sad things about Sci-Twi's life at Crystal Prep. In fact, we saw how they were treating her at Crystal Prep, and they were being mean to her there.

Her reaction to it

For that matter, what did it say about Canterlot High, Crystal Prep Academy, and the relative difference between their respective student bodies and administrative policies? The delta value between the two schools, so to speak. Of course, Twilight would need much more data about Canterlot High, and as interesting as an attempt to quantize scholastic cultures sounded, she had rather more pressing concerns.

is pure Sci-Twi. Sci-Twi intellectualizes everything to the point where she makes Pony Moon Dancer seem like a raw sensualist by comparison.

Twilight supposed the boy was attractive from a relatively objective viewpoint, but that insult clarified matters. He had perfected Sour Sweet's personality, combining superficial politeness and sincere hostility into a seamless whole. It was almost impressive, in a horrible sort of way.

Sci-Twi's mistake is logical, given her false assumption (that Flash knows she's from Crystal Prep), but what's sad is that one of the reasons she is primed to expect an insult is her prior experience in her school. In fact, Flash is happy to see her, and is attempting to be affectionate and friendly (because, of course, he thinks she's the other Twilight Sparkle).

Ditzy winked. “Good news is, I can explain this one.”

Flash's jaw dropped. A girl willing to explain what they thought. His prayers were officially answered.

Yeah ... part of the problem here is that Princess Twilight never explained anything to him either. The Equestria Girls series presents a horrible model of how to deal with someone to whom one is romantically-attracted -- Princess Twilight keeps Flash completely in the dark about her true identity and purposes. Justified because Princess Twilight's secret really is very hard to believe, and Twilight herself is completely clueless about romantic love, so she doesn't fully grasp just how terribly wrong is her approach.

It doesn't help that Flash's previous love, Sunset Shimmer, had even more secrets than does Twilight ("Oh yeah, I'm not only an alien but an alien criminal, and I'm using you and your whole school as pawns in my plans to return home to my own world and carve out an empire for myself.")

“The one from this world, I guess. You know, the actually human one, as opposed to the one who’s a magical flying alien princess horse.” Ditzy flapped her hands for emphasis.

“Oh. Right." Flash shuddered. "I… try not to think about that.”

Ditzy nodded. “Can’t say I blame you.”

The great irony here is that Flash's previous girlfriend was also a magical alien horse. And in my fanon I go for him having, before that dated Lyra Heartstrings -- and my Lyras were soul-switched between he universes at age five. So, pretty much, everyone he's ever romantically loved was born a magic horse. Specifically, a Unicorn.

This isn't a coincidence, either. Something about Equestrian culture, as expressed by Mount Avalon Unicorns, obviously attracts him. And his own values make him seem like a good Humanoid analogue of an (admirable) Equestrian stallion to Equestrian Ponies.

Poor Flash. He's doomed to fall in love with beings who may not be able to give their hearts to him fully, because their true loyalties are someplace else.

"I'm telling you, Lyra, there have been multiple credible eyewitness accounts of the Arimaspi in the Hyperboreans."

"I thought I was supposed to be the crazy one in this relationship."

I'm guessing that your Humanoid Bon-Bon has the same interest in crytpozoology as does her Pony analogue, and that she has a good chance to wind up working for some sort of monster-hunting organization, as well.

Digressing onto my fanon in light of your fanon ...

In my fanon, where the Lyra-souls got switched at around age five, the Lyras are kind of nuts because each of them remembers five years of life as the other species. Humanoid Lyra has what everyone assumes is a delusion that she used to be a Unicorn filly living on a magical mountain; and Pony Lyra that she used to be a Humanoid living in a city of awesomely-advanced technology. Both of them are essentially soul-mates of the Bon-Bon's, with Humanoid Lyra being lucky enough to meet her in high school, and Pony Lyra being unfortunate to encounter Winning-Through-Degradation first (but wind up with Bon-Bon in the end).

My Humanoid Lyra dated Flash before she fell in love with Bon-Bon. This wouldn't change their affect that much: though Lyra lost romantic interest in Flash (mostly, because she's more lesbian than heterosexual), she still likes him as a friend (and my Bon-Bon tolerates him well enough) for one big reason, to which Sunset Shimmer also alludes. Flash is extremely decent, an extremely considerate, caring and kind lover (especially in the older sense of the word "lover"). This is actually a big part of the reason why he is attractive to Equestrian upper-class Unicorn mares -- his extremely courtly and friendly romantic style perfectly suits their cultural ideals (My Humanoid Lyra was never a "mare," though she was a "filly," and long enough to pick up on her culture's romantic ideals).

In any case, my Flash was never pushy or hostile to my Lyra during their mid-teens puppy-love affair, so Lyra still likes him, a lot. And Bon-Bon, generally, is cool with anyone who is nice to Lyra -- just as she'd hate any ex-boyfriend who had been mean to Lyra. She's confident enough that she has Lyra's love that she's not jealous of what once was between them.


Good explanation for why the Humane Six didn't have time to talk to Flash about what was going on with Sci-Twi. In vanilla-canon, Sunset is under a lot of stress at that point. Plus, even if she's given up on Flash (as she states in Rainbow Rocks), that doesn't mean that she really wants to be Flash's go-to-girl for romantic advice.

Ditzy gulped and crossed her fingers. "Putting a god on a machine, hopefully."

Hey, Ditzy knows the literal meaning of the term! Very good!

I liked the Lower Deck perspective on Friendship Games!

Hahaaaa!

This can only end well for him.

Loving Ditzy as well. :derpytongue2:

In a blink, Sunset was face to face with him, clutching his jacket's lapels. "Which one, Flash? The one who never answered my pleas for help and is now totally inaccessible, or the one who took away my one way home? Or is there a third one, because why wouldn't there be? Whatever delinquent gods oversee this universe clearly have nothing better to do than mess with me, so—"

Sunny-bunny's noggin went bye-bye...

Also, the girls were a bit...needlessly bitchy to Flash. I mean, he just asked a simple question. Even if things ARE a bit tense right now, that's...that's not really how friends act. (Yeah, I know, I'm just remarking.)

When Twilight emerged from her dark transformation, most students fled the stands in an attempt to get away from the terrifying monster. A few stayed where they were. In Flash's case, it was because all of his thoughts were consumed by trying to resolve an internal conflict.

I shouldn't find a crazy demon girl this hot.

:rainbowlaugh: Every brony's reaction to Midnight Sparkle.

"Flash?" It was Twilight's voice, but it came from behind her. Everyone turned to see another purple girl, her brow furrowed, her tone hurt. "Why are you apologizing to my human counterpart?"

Flash supposed he should feel afraid in this situation. Instead, he felt a warm glow of pride in his chest. He moved from Twilight to Twilight, smiled, and said, "This isn't what it looks like. I can explain."

:facepalm: Flash, you stupid, stupid little man.

All you needed to say was "I bumped into her in the hall the other day." And that would be that.

Instead, you opened with the dumbest words possible.

This was a fun little read. Especially Derpy's stuff. :rainbowlaugh:

Georg #5 · Jan 5th, 2016 · · ·

I can explain. Where did the grenade go that belongs to this pin? Do you think this ice is too thin? I can swim to shore.

Dumb ways to die. So many dumb ways to die.

Poor Flash, he tries so hard.

6803462
Yeah. His lot is not a happy one. Still, just because people dislike the reasons for his existence doesn't mean he can't be a useful or entertaining character.

6803525

...Twilight herself is completely clueless about romantic love, so she doesn't fully grasp just how terribly wrong is her approach.

There's an idea: Cadence learns about how Twilight's been treating human Flash, then practically drags her by the ear through the portal so she can apologize to the poor boy, lecturing her all the while.

Given how open the Rainbooms are about magic while on campus (and musical instrument stores, pawn shops, research facilities...) it's clear that most of their peers are at least somewhat familiar with the nature of the supernatural. Pinkie Pie was probably the one who spread the word to all and sundry, or at least fed the information into the rumor mill. Flash and my instance of human Ditzy Doo would've both sought out more information, Ditzy because of her fascination with the fantastic, Flash to know more about Twilight.

This isn't a coincidence, either. Something

Poor Flash.

Also, looks like you cut yourself off there.

In any case, I'm very glad you liked it.

6803561
Among other things, this was a nice opportunity to get back into the swing of writing my instance of Ditzy Doo. After all, I'm way overdue on working with that setting.

6803635
In the case of the rest of the main cast, it was less bitchiness than it was concern for Sunset's sanity and Flash's continued safety. And no small amount of astonishment at Flash's misplaced priorities.

6803726

Princess Cadance would, of course, be aware that Princess Twilight wasn't being intentionally cruel to Humanoid Flash Sentry. She knows Twilight well enough to know that Twilight was just being shy, and distracted by other pursuits. But, yeah, she'd explain to Twilight what she was doing wrong, and urge Twilight very strongly to tell Flash the truth about Twiight's own nature. And, maybe, about Twilight's own intentions, once Twilight herself has figured them out.

See, I think that part of the problem is that Twilight doesn't know what she wants out of the situation. In my fanon, part of the reason is that she's torn between her feelings for Luna (which are emotionally but not yet sexually strong, in part because Twilight's mostly straight) and those for Flash (who matches her romantic search image but isn't even a Pony or from her world). She's being put in a situation of choosing between somepony whom she intensely respects and likes, and is starting to find romantically-exciting as well (Luna) and someone whom she finds romantically exciting and sexually-arousing, but doesn't know that well and who isn't even her SPECIES. And she definitely is more intererested in them than in anyone else she's ever known, which sometimes makes her worry about her fundamental sanity.

In both vanilla-canon and my fanon, a lot of it is that Twilight has absolutely no romantic experience -- Flash is literally the first male being with whom she's fallen in love, and she has no idea how to handle things beyond basic decency and politeness. Which are important, of course -- without these she wouldn't be able to win respect or be capable of dealing with others socially -- but aren't enough to deal with decisions this complicated and potentially-important.

Fixed the cut-off.

Did Flash Sentry just meet with planeswalker Ditzy Doo?

"Look, that was clearly not the Twilight we all know, love, and allow to participate in extracurricular activities despite not attending any classes." -- Best line ever. Sports team victories have been vacated for less.

6803726 There's an idea: Cadence learns about how Twilight's been treating human Flash, then practically drags her by the ear through the portal so she can apologize to the poor boy, lecturing her all the while.

YOINK!

I'm sorry I didn't get back to this one in time. My internet situation is... wonky.

Oh, my. This is slightly more awkward an ending than the actual movie.

Ri2

Oh, Flash...

Hm...Ditzy Do seems off compared to her portrayal in “Slice of Life.” But I have to admit, this line made me laugh:

"Look, that was clearly not the Twilight we all know, love, and allow to participate in extracurricular activities despite not attending any classes.”

6803809
Sort of. He met with a Ditzy rather than a Muffins. There are several varieties of She of the Seven Bubbles. In this case, I employed mine.

6803830
It's fine. I know how frustrating technical difficulties can be. And you're certainly welcome to the idea. I'd love to see what you do with it.

6804331
As noted above, this was a Ditzy rather than a Muffins. Don't get me wrong, Muffins is a nice girl, but I needed a version of Best Human who could explain the implications of parallel universes.

I love this. Poor Flash - I know he can be an awesome character, I intend to write him as such, but alas, the actual writers either can't or won't.

Seriously though, I have this headcanon of him being perceptive, smart, and very good at deductive and inductive reasoning, which is actually kinda supported by the first two films, but alas, the writers can't pick up on that.

Part of me wonders if Lyra and Bon Bon are the Sam and Dean Winchester of the EQG world, :twistnerd:

Good. Your Ditzy never ceases to amaze.

6803525 is the stuff you're talking about here detailed in any stories yet?

Well, this was a thing.

...really don't have much to say beyond that. First time I've ever said this, but I literally don't have an opinion on this piece.

While I had some problems with this piece overall, I have to say that the misunderstanding between Flash and Twilight was hilarious from Twilight's perspective. Seeing her go "Oh, so he thinks I'm going to make it easier for them to win" was great.

The joke right at the end was great, too.

6803525 Are you a TV Troper? Your comment is written in their style (Justified because...)

6806895

I love TV Tropes! :pinkiehappy:

Poor Flash, but that's what you get when you have a romantic entanglement with someone who is technically a cross dimensional duplicate.

"Well, earlier today, I walked into that Twilight over there—"

Both rolled their eyes and chorused, "Of course you did."

Also, I'm kind of suspicious that Flash is actually the one with eye problems here.

"That's what I thought at first, but..." Flash shook his head. "What do I say? 'Sorry, I thought you were you?'"

My recommendation would have to be, "Sorry, I thought that you were a talking magical horse."

Woah there, Sunset. :twilightoops:
(Is that racist? I feel like it might be racist. Specisist?)

I shouldn't find a crazy demon girl this hot.

Naw, you're already on record for finding a horse hot. Embrace the weirdness.

Finding the transformed Sunset just as attractive as Twilight was little comfort to Flash.

I'm thinking 'xenosexual'.

6806970 I read your comment on Colonel Mustang's voice.

6807425

Naw, you're already on record for finding a horse hot. Embrace the weirdness.

Two horse-girls in vanilla canon, and three in my fanon. With no known romantic attractions to anyone who isn't in one way or another a Pony in Human Form. He's definitely equinosexual. :rainbowlaugh:

In my fanon there's also Velvet Blaze, who was a perfectly ordinary horse in horse form. But they were just good friends.

6807537 Just imagine how that would go... "Come on, Twi; let me show you one of my old friends. Her name's Velvet."

:rainbowlaugh:

6808839

Sadly, Velvet's dead. But the really ironic thing is that Twilight Sparkle's mother is named ...

Twilight Velvet.

Actually, I'd say that 'explain' is synonymic with 'migraine' right now so, if I were Princess T, I would ask Flash not to attempt it.

Well this was fun. I enjoyed Ditzy breaking chemistry.

I liked it. It fills in the gaps nicely, and with some really nice characterization. The only—and very minor—gripe I had was that some of the pop culture references were difficult to grasp, even necessitating explanation in the author's notes. For instance, it took me quite a bit to get that Whinny was Disney, and I'm still not completely sure. As this is a really common situation in the fandom, I have to commend you for at least explaining the one. That's more than most do.


The only two typos I found:

He fidgeting under the persistent, off-kilter stare.

Twilight walked by again, folded in on herself at the side a very severe-looking woman.

6816488
Yes, I was going for a Whinny-Disney equivalence, based on this moment from the comics. Sorry for the confusion. :twilightsheepish:

Cryptozoologist Bon Bon? Quantum-physics-explicating muffin girl? The line 'magical flying alien princess horse'?

The only part of this story I can find fault with is the weirdly compressed cover art.

6830292
It was the best image of the scene I could find. :twilightsheepish:

6830654 Wow. The universe really hates Flash Sentry.

Hilarious. I love how the background characters are all, "Huh, must be Tuesday," about everything going on while the main characters are rushing around and panicking. This could so easily be canon that I'll just incorporate it until disproved by comic or film.

Flash felt someone patting his back. He turned and gave a flat look to Ditzy Doo. “Seriously?”

This is great.

Flash bit his lip. After a few moments, he said, "Uh... amnesia?”

You dense motherbucker.

"Just because my eyes are wonky doesn't mean I don't pay attention to things, especially not magical flying alien princess horses. If she played card games, she'd represent just about every major interest I've had since I was four." Ditzy smirked. "I don't even like girls and I'm kind of jealous of how much she likes you."

Heh.

"Just explain that it's a case of mistaken Twidentity."

Boo! That was bad!

He gulped, a chill going down his spine. Sunset had a lot of different kinds of anger, and that forced tone was reserved for the most intense varieties. "I... I was hoping you could help me with a problem I'm having with Twilight." A chill went down Flash's spine as he heard himself. That had sounded a lot better in his head.

Oh dear. You should not have said that.

I shouldn't find a crazy demon girl this hot.

Evil is Sexy, buddy. Evil Is Sexy. The Sirens and Midnight Sparkle are brilliant examples of this.

Ditzy gulped and crossed her fingers. "Putting a god on a machine, hopefully."

It's fitting because Deus Ex Machina means God In The Machine.

Finding the transformed Sunset just as attractive as Twilight was little comfort to Flash.

Poor guy.

"Flash?" It was Twilight's voice, but it came from behind her. Everyone turned to see another purple girl, her brow furrowed, her tone hurt. "Why are you apologizing to my human counterpart?"
Flash supposed he should feel afraid in this situation. Instead, he felt a warm glow of pride in his chest. He moved from Twilight to Twilight, smiled, and said, "This isn't what it looks like. I can explain."

Oh god you idiot, never say that.

Yes, this instance of She of the Seven Bubbles is rather different from canon. This is a Ditzy Doo, as opposed to a Muffins. Derpologists have recorded at least four substrains of strabismic blondes across Equestrian probability space.

This is fantastic.

Zigarre is, as you may have guessed, German for cigar. Can you think of a better name for pony Freud?

... Point taken.

And don't worry, Flash will... well, at the very least, he'll survive.

Please make a sequel to this...

I loved Ditzy's characterization. She seems to be the only true friend Flash has.

It might be fun if it shows that just as Twilight fell for the Flash of another universe, the human Twilight also falls for the Flash of another universe.

6984242
I like the idea, but the tricky part will be getting her to notice him as she's entranced by a world full of magic. I suppose if they walked into one another...

6985628

If she needed someone to show her around, and of course Flash will help the Princess who is obviously 'hiding her wings' or is obviously the princess' twin sister or something.

6985628

Since if she was a changeling, she wouldn't be missing the wings.

Very, very good use of pony Ditsy Doo.

Very nice short.:yay:

A girl willing to explain what they thought. His prayers were officially answered. "Well... sure!"

Gender humor, always funny.:twilightblush:

"Just because my eyes are wonky doesn't mean I don't pay attention to things, especially not magical flying alien princess horses. If she played card games, she'd represent just about every major interest I've had since I was four." Ditzy smirked. "I don't even like girls and I'm kind of jealous of how much she likes you."

What other interests would that be? :trixieshiftright:

He caught Bonbon's gaze for just long enough to see her snarl at him. Right. Still mad at him for the frosted loaf of bread. Definitely not going to help him out anymore, and Lyra would probably support her best friend.

What frosted loaf of bread? :twilightoops:

Whatever delinquent gods oversee this universe clearly have nothing better to do than mess with me, so—"

:trollestia:

Zigarre is, as you may have guessed, German for cigar. Can you think of a better name for pony Freud?

LOL I was wondering about that. :rainbowlaugh:

~Leonzilla

7157031

What frosted loaf of bread? :twilightoops:

This frosted loaf of bread. Though it appears to be more glazed than frosted. Still, those sprinkles are staying on somehow.

7157895 I should have known, clearly a sign it's been too long since I watched the Friendship Games.:rainbowlaugh:

~Leonzilla

6803726

What does EQ!Cadence -> Portal look like? ... How about the other Princesses? Discord... Zecora?

We know about EQ!Rainbow and Twilight's Human forms... What about the rest of the Mane6? ... And basically anyone else you feel like talking about. ... Although, if those are spoilers, that's totally find if you keep mum.

Aw, poor Flash, oh well, he's still got his music.

6985628

It does seem some constants and variables naturally repeat themselves. Like a Twilight Sparkle will always run into a Flash Sentry when they first meet.

He caught Bonbon's gaze for just long enough to see her snarl at him. Right. Still mad at him for the frosted loaf of bread.

Hey, that was as much her fault as it was his.

I don't know whether to 'Like' or 'Dislike' cause I'm so confused...

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