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the premiere of season one plus the first sonic rainboom but its abridged

Sonic Rainboom, WHOOOOOOSH!


“Starlight, don’t do the thing!” Twilight shouts.

“I’m doing the thing!” Starlight hollers.

“Starlight did the thing!” Twilight yells and Spike faints. “You’re useless Spike!”

“Now I’m gonna have a mental breakdown with a flashback for dramatic flair!” Starlight screams before breaking down, sobbing.

“Now that everything is reverting back to normal, I hereby reform you and give you amnesty for murdering countless timelines,” Twilight announces, and Starlight flips her mane back, the style now completely different.

“Thanks Twilight. Let’s go!”


“Whee, pretty butterflies- I mean, sorry for landing on you…” Fillyshy says and a bright light emanates from her flank, showing her newly acquired cutie mark. “Oh, okay…”


“I’m so awesome, my ego knows no bounds! Hahaha!” Rainbow Dash cries as a rainbow lightning bolt emerges as her cutie mark. “Hells yeah! Cutie mark and stupid bullies in one go!”


“Wow, this rock farm is really depressing…” Pinkamena whispered before light blinded her. “Hisss! The light! It burns… so… good!” Pinkamena’s hair poofed up and she visibly brightened.

“Fourth wall breaking and party fun times ensue!” Pinkie shouts as she races to her home to spread joy to her whole family except Maud who doesn’t appear for another few chapters.


“Who dis be that ruining my day?” Princess Celestia demands as she enters the room and sees a mutant baby Spike and Filly Sparkle. “Oh, a potential student! Time to take her in as my protoge and never let her see the light of day for a few years!”

Princess Celestia proceeds to deactivate Filly Sparkle by throwing cake at her and fixes all her damage. “Like the tyrant I am!”


“Gosh, I love apples,” Applejack whispers as she caresses an apple in the pile of apples she’s drowning in. A cutie mark appears on her flank but she passes out from too many apples.

“Stop being a liar, AJ!” Big Mac yells from somewhere.

“Shut your fat trap, Big Mac!” Applejack snorts.


“Stupid dress!” Rarity shrieks before being pulled away by her magic. “AHHHHHHHHHH!”

“Oh wait, now I’m bored,” Rarity humphs as the background card changes. Seeing her magic stop at a rock, she kicks it. “Stupid rock!”

With a grumble, the rock explodes, sending Rarity flying. As the dust settles, Rarity pokes her head out of the rubble. “My mane! Wait, gems! Yay!” A cutie mark appears on her flank.

“Yeeeee! Cutie mark too?! Thanks stupid rock!”


“How could she win!?” Rarity bawls as she looked at Derpy’s atrocious creation of a cart. “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” she bellowed in a surprisingly deep and mechanical voice.


Fast forwards yissss…

“Reading books with Moondancer, yay!” Twilight says before packing her bags and heading to the library… from the library. “Important business, saving the world, can’t come to your party, bye!”

“Argh! Now I’ll hate you forever!” Moondancer shook a hoof.

“Spike, get me Predictions and Prophecies!” Twilight yells, the book now appearing on a pedestal. “Oh no, Nightmare Moon!” Twilight quickly scribbled down a neat letter that Spike whooshed away: Bad guys coming. Send helps plz.

In a jiff, a letter was poofed back. Hahaha no worries just go 2 Ponyville and be planr 4 for the Summer Sun Celebration while I sit back and be useless.

“Sounds good, let’s go!” Twilight states and they were suddenly in Ponyville.

“Le gasp!” Pinkie exclaims and disappears.

“Why are there clouds in sky?” Twilight asked and Rainbow flew in from nowhere, destroying all of them in one go.

“Haha, ten seconds flat!”

“Noice!” Spike shouts. He then spots Rarity and drops his jaw to the ground. “Hubba hubba!”

“Shut up, Casanova! Fluttershy is shy and fluttering!”

“Nope, baby dragon!” she exclaimed and rushed over to Spike.

“Now Applejack for food, how are you Apple-”

“Howdy, eat all these pies while I introduce my whole family in my signature country accent!” Applejack exclaimed as she began to rattle. Soon, Twilight finished.

“I’m full!” Twilight exclaims.

“PARTAYYYY!” Pinkie shouts from seemingly nowhere and everywhere.


“The night will last 5EVERRRRRRRR! Dat is more den 4ever!” Nightmare Moon decreed.

“Oh noes, Nightmare Moon is back!” Rarity cries, “Whatever will we do?”

“Sing a few musical numbers and reach the Castle of the Two Sisters!” Pinkie explains and everypony nods. In no time, they found the stone Elements.

“Nightmare Moon, we banish you!” Twilight exclaims.

“Hahaha, Elements are useless!” Nightmare Moon blasted the stone Elements to smithereens.

“No,” Twilight cried. “But now we have a dramatic showdown where I revive the Elements!”

“Applejack, Honesty. Rainbow, Loyalty. Pinkie, Laughter. Rarity, Generosity. Fluttershy, Kindness. And me? Magic!” They rose up in white light as necklaces formed around them and Twilight looked like she was possessed.

“TASTE THE RAINBOW!” somepony shouts as a rainbow beam of destruction and purification comes down on Nightmare Moon. The Nightmare’s control over Luna then shatters, leaving a depowered Alicorn Princess.

“Sister, you’re back from your vacation!” Princess Celestia chimed as she flew in through a window.

“Forgive me, sister!” Luna cried.

“All is 5given. That is more than 4given.”

“Thank you,” Luna whispered.

“Celestia, must I go back to Canterlot?” Twilight asks.

“No, you can stay with your friends in Ponyville. Write about your friendship problems and send me a postcard while I sit back and do nothing for the entire season!” Celestia announces before she and Luna poof away.

“EVEN BIGGER PARTAY!!!!!” Pinkie Pie exclaims and their entire world shifts back to Ponyville.

“Gah! Spatial displacement gives me headaches!” Rarity cries before falling onto a sofa that came from nowhere.

“Wha- how- we were just- but- huh?” Twilight whimpers as her head spins from Pinkie’s ridiculous antics.

“It’s Pinkie. Don’t question it,” Applejack whispers and Twilight could only look at her in bafflement.

“But-”

“And scene!” Pinkie shouted before smacking a large clapperboard across Twilight’s face. With a smirk, Pinkie strikes a pose.

“Looks like you’ve just seen me in action!

Badum tshhhhh!

Author's Note:

I'm sorry.