• Member Since 8th Apr, 2016
  • offline last seen Jun 1st, 2023

ComingSun767


Don't hesitate to say hi

Comments ( 45 )

Needs some spacing and punctuation when someone is talking so it stands out.
"Helps the readers know someone is talking" Said the commentator.

Comment posted by ComingSun767 deleted May 20th, 2016

7108811 I agree, and I've seen some sentences where you've put the period like this .im sorry but Im not sure how this story made it past screening.

.....i will clean this up......I'll try and help

Granny, Mac and I are going to show Sun to his room now.


Fear me for I am the grammar natzi.

This story is really cool please make more

7405721 Grammar Nazi

You spelt it wrong.

Good concept but you need some serious work done with the grammar, that's frigging horrible.

O.......M........G!!!!!!!!!!!! :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1: :pinkiegasp: :derpyderp1:

It could just be me, but this chapter seems a bit rushed.

.... This reminds me of 'your human and you' just with sentient humans.:coolphoto:

Comment posted by Mr cold ghost deleted Aug 11th, 2019

Interesting, could be a little bit longer, but I'm not complaining. Wonder where you're going to take this.

Comment posted by Grizzly Nation deleted Aug 11th, 2019

Immediately I turned to Shinning, "You'er not fighting are you?"

You're*

10052648
More chapters coming your way very soon.

"I think I have an announcement to make."

"I've come to make an announcement: shadow the hedgehog is a b-..."

Login or register to comment