Often a single day, a single event can change our lives forever. But even when that event is over, life will find a new equilibrium of sorts. It’s just a matter of accepting this new ‘normal’.
wooooooooooooooooow. Some friends AJ and Rarity were. A bunch of asses.
Also, It's so sad TwiDashfoever is gone. I truly enjoyed his/her work.
I have some great High hopes you'll finish this story ScratchnTavi. Since you were the co-writer of this story, I know you'll make this story as good as Twidash would have make it. I'll be routing for you my friend, and I'll be looking forward to the next update.
Yep, as much as it was foreshadowed and hinted at, I'm still kind of taken aback by the flat out refusal of their relationship by AJ and Rarity. To be honest, I'm surprised the endorsement of Celestia and Luna on the grounds of it being more common in the past would have had more traction. It'll be interesting to see how they get through this, the support of themselves should be the deciding factor. Welcome to the story, looks like you're off to a good start. ^^
7190295 Seems like it 7190304 7190339 7190350 7190370 7190367 7190406 Thank you for the support! I'll try to keep it in good shape, but it really means a lot to me that you stick with it, even with me on your horseshoes now
I don't get it, I mean I knew Applejack would be a problem, but Rarity? In the other world she made those really expensive clothes for Twi and Rainbow was going to model for her for a whole summer. How can there be any issues there?
7190520 7190552 7190574 Thanks! 7190527 Seems like you missed some context from the earlier chapters. Rarity was having a fit as well before they became friends again in the human world 7190525 With time, with time ^^
Great Chapter... Sad That TwiDashForever threw in the towel... but i can understand conpletely... Darn you Josh habier... though i did love Friendship Games.... though Starlight is killing Season 6 For me.. the really need to remove her all she is is a Sunset Shimmer Clone.. and that ain't good... ain't good at all..
I have to agree, great chapter. While I also find it sad that Twidashforever is gone, you're doing a good job ScratchnTavi.
On a humorous note: I bet AJ is just pissed of because of jealousy. I could imagine that she had the hots for Dash but couldn't muster the courage to ask her out. Well, now her chances are gone. Too bad, so sad. Just joking but who knows, right?
7190527 Well if the reading of the story is what I think it is, it's not the homosexuality that is the issue for Rarity but the choice of partners. With Rainbow Dash being too crude and brash for a Princess like Twilight.
7190607 To be honest, I hate Judgmental Applejack and Rarity with every fiber of my being; however, it's just such a damn good plot point that I can't complain!
I still want to hit them upside the head for being so damn judgmental.
I'm seriously hoping that Luna visits Applejack in a dream to inquire about her position, and see what she can do to help out her friends. She's got a vested, personal interest in the matter and all.
7190847 I thought that too, but that doesn't fit the equivilent in the other world. Twilight is just a student there, so saying that Rainbow isn't good enough for you is even more insulting. Why would Rainbow continue to be friends (or more accurately path up a friendship) with someone who thought that. I mean, it would still pretty insulting for pony Rarity to think something like that, it's like saying 'you're not good enough for a Princess', real nice thing to say to a friends. I don't think Rarity would quite think that way.
I have loved this story since I started reading the first chapter of the first part. I can tell you that I feel the difference with your writing. If I had to sum it up your style is more... playful jovial. Its lighter closer to the cartoon at least that's what I felt from this chapter even with the emotional weight at the end. Overall I like it.
Guuuh... I was worried about this since Celestia was less than enthused. This should have ended up a joke and not serious drama.
Gayngst and bigotry have no place in Equestria.
None.
Judging people on who they love has no business in a world where Love can be tangibly, and physically made manifest.
Which is why it should have been a joke. Something along the lines of Twi and Rainbow being gobsmacked when the pony Rarity and Applejack are all smiles and happy words for the new couple. Instead we get... shit that should never be written in this setting. I'd be willing to bet fully half the stories on this site with a Romance tag have some measure of this kind of drama, and I, for one, am well and truly sick of it. I know you authors have the creativity to not go for the low hanging fruit of Romantic drama, but you guys do it all the fucking time anyway.
For the third time, that kind of bigotry has no place in the setting of My Little Pony. I like reading fantasy to get away from the dumb ideas humans have, not see it rehashed over and over and over and over in stories with otherwise unique and interesting concepts.
Ugh...
/rant
That all said, I didn't see anything wrong with the switch from TDF. From a writing standpoint this chapter was as top-notch as ever, it was the content that cheesed me off.
7191594 I can't hear you over the sound of it's his story and he's writing it how he pleases.
If you don't like it, don't read it. Comments are always good, but at least make them constructive, not just a rant telling the author that they made a stupid decision. Especially since you don't live in Equestria, and therefore have zero right to tell anybody anything about how life works there.
You know, we had hoped that the most obvious plot wouldn't have been used, as it's more entertaining to have the unexpected. Equestria just got a bit darker, both from this and poor TwiDashForever. Oh well, things move on, hopefully with the humans as guides maybe relationships can be salvaged better this time around? Keep going! ;)
After reading some comments about AJ and Rarity, I decided to throw my 5 cents to it.
Honestly, I don't find it weird that AJ and Rarity are not exactly happy over the fact, that Twilight and Dash are in relationship. AJ is a simple farm girl and judging by my own expirience (I live on a countryside), people who are raised here are like that as well. Of course i'm not generalising and saying that everyone is like that, but you know what I mean. Rarity on the other hand... I'm gonna go with something someone else wrote that she is more concered about who is Princess in relationship with instead of that relationship being homosexual. It seems like a fair point and for me suits her personality well.
And some would say that "Equestria should be more open-minded and stuff!". I'd have to disagree on that. Why? Well, even though it's a fantasy land with anthropomorfic magical horses... their way of thinking and understanding is very simmilar to ours. So of course there will be ponies who do and don't agree with that kind of relationships. We just think they would be since we're so used to see tons of same sex sipping fanictions/artwork. It's kinda like in Touhou fandom. Touhou is a series of bullet hell shooters, which cast is almost entirely female, and because of that, majority of shipping type artwork is describing them as lesbians, to the point that there's even a joke "Everybody is gay in Gensokyo!" (Gensokyo is a place of action in Touhou series).
And you know what? As much as I don't like people, who will say things like AJ or Rarity, I like it in the fic. It adds some realism to that. Because let's be honest, another story where the forrbiden friut kind of a relationship will work just fine without any difficulties, would be just boring. We live in a world where gay people have problems like that sooner or later. I wish they hadn't, but well, what can you do. And the fact that Equestria, the land of fantasy also have problems like that? Fine by me. If these technicolor horses are simmilar to us humans in the way they act and think, it's only natural that things like that will occur.
Well. I thought this story was in good hooves before. Now I know it.
You got the tone of their banter just right, Scratchy. :) It flows well with the previous chapters.
And for the neighsayers below, I will say: you guys sure missed a lot of telegraphing. AJ/Raritys' likely initial reactions have been mentioned numerous times before this. This was actually milder than I feared it might be. Friends can come back from this yet. Nothing irrevocable has been said.
Now, being a pony lovey happy story, there is hope that they will realize they are being silly and snap out of it eventually, but that's for the future, when the laws of character development and plot necessity demand it.
Hmm guess I did miss that T~T but the stories are still there and they are all complete so small yay.
Called AJ but was surprised about Rarity since positive interactions in TtLG but seems things will get better. I am hoping that they can patch things up.
Seems interesting that (as presented in the show) with such a seemingly huge gender imbalance that mare/mare relationships would be taboo. Guess there is just a huge hidden make population that is never talked about.
I like your style. It shows promise and that the story won't suffer for the change. Kudos for that
About the chapter... Indeed, out was rather telegraphed. Nothing wrong about that, or about their reactions in the first moment, when there's been no time to think and emotions rule. On the long run though I quite expect it to progress differently from the human 'verse. Mostly because "immortal goddess support". Rarity refusal seems to come from a heavily story-influenced view in romance and what's " proper". It will be quite hard for her to keep any kind of refusal when the ones that rather define what's right or wrong come and say "yeah, there's nothing wrong with that, we actually support it". Applejack's comes from tradition... Another that had already been shown to be fake. How can she say it's wrong when the immortal rulers say it only fell out of practice in " recent " times? Kinda hard to use "tradition" and "what is right" when those same things are thrown into your face and proven wrong. Of course, being stubborn as she is it will still take quite some time for her to come around... But most likely it will be somewhat faster and more completely than the human one.
All in all, princesses from thousands of years past change both arguments/beliefs rather drastically. I'm not going to assume it will progress exactly out even somewhat like that... But disconsider their influence when the moral qualms are rather connected with their presence, importance and life span wouldn't be good for the story, I believe. Ponies are quite human though, so when they don't want to see they won't, but when you don't have religion to be the base of a belief on a way that can't be countered because of its "divine" nature it becomes quite harder for that belief not to crumble. Simple societal norms are harder to hold when the ones who rather define them go against you.
I'd say I'm anxiously waiting to see how you're going to develop this in a non "this is exactly what happened to the humans" way. THAT would be lazy writing, no offense intended.
You sound incredibly foolish talking about criticism that way on a creative medium website.
You make it sound like any criticism is inherently useless because "the author can write what they want to write."
But.. you're wrong. Like, stupidly wrong.
Criticism also doesn't mean someone suddenly hates something. Far from it, I was being very critical because I've been reading since TLG started last Summer. I'm pretty heavily invested in this story, at this point, and I want it to be the best it can be. Does that make me entitled to the story panning out how I would like? Fuck no. Am I entitled to my opinion about how things could be made better and the ability to express that opinion? Absofuckinglutely.
You also seem to have dodged the crux of my criticism because you disagree with my assessment of Equestria. The way love working in the show meaning there shouldn't be bigotry over same-sex couples is my personal interpretation. Gayngst and bigotry being used as a source of conflict in a romance story in FimFiction being tired, overused, and cliche, is an objective fact. One that I know TDF/SnT could have worked around.
They were a team that created a conflict in the previous story where Twilight goes into heat and is in utter misery. Turning sex from one of the things that partially defines these two humans lives into torture that's hurting themselves and their new friends.
7192613 No, it's NOT an objective fact. I fucking hate the "Oh, it's a cliche" argument. Do you know how many movies, books, games, etc. are based on cliches? How many of those are amazing films or whatever? A lot of them. Cliche doesn't mean bad.
If it's something you're tired of reading, too bad. It doesn't mean it's automatically a bad choice.
And I most certainly DID NOT make it sound like criticism is inherently useless. If that's how you felt, then I'm sorry, but that is most certainly not what I wrote. I simply told you that telling an author that they made a stupid decision is unhelpful. (Meanwhile, you respond by telling me that I'm just stupid. How very uninspired.)
And yes, it's still just your interpretation, as you even agreed. So at least we've buried that issue.
As for your last entry. Maybe you should learn that just calling something "stupid" isn't going to help anybody. Because seriously, that's apparently your new favorite word.
I can't hear you over the sound of it's his story and he's writing it how he pleases.
Outright says that criticism is useless. That it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks, if that's how the writer wants to write it, then it's inherently correct. How else am I supposed to interpret that?
And yes, maybe I used "stupid" a few too many times, but it's an apt word for the idea that I was trying to express. Namely, that the things I labelled stupid "lacked in thought, intelligence, or sense".
You're also absolutely right. Cliches are used for a reason. They work, much of the time, and sometimes even serve an important purpose for creating the proper tone and atmosphere in a given work, by building on a readers preconceived notions and experience with said cliches.
But that doesn't mean that they're always acceptable. Like I said, I have bigger expectations out of this fic than rehashing the same old shit. That doesn't mean the author is required to meet my expectations, the only reason that would ever be fair is if I personally commissioned the work. But I was compelled to express my displeasure because I know for certain that they could have come up with a better, less overused, form of interpersonal conflict that would have been truer to the story, setting, and even my own expectations, lofty though they apparently are.
I'm passionate about this story, and that passion may have made me sound like a dick, and I'm sorry for that, but I staunchly stand by my opinion that this was a foolish turn for the story, and something better should have been in its place.
No, no it really doesn't. It says that the author is entitled to writing how he pleases. I even then went on in the next sentence to say how constructive criticism is GOOD. The author is, in the immortal words of Gaiman, "Not your bitch".
It’s been that way fer ages, and Ah’m sure that nature would’ve given all of us mares a possibility fer fillies if it were. That ain’t right what y’all are doing
I guess our animal kingdom really is different then theirs. I have been taking Psychology for some time now and I have been learning that the animal kingdom is not all that straight. Ducks mate changes with the wind. Swans are actually more commonly gay then you would think, cats have this tendency as well. Sure they can't reproduce so in that way it seems weird, but in actuality its just something society came up with the conclusion: everything is supposed to be straight. If you think that is crazy, try convincing someone your door does not swing at all or that you are a loner completely happy being single the rest of your life. All I am saying is that even with everything we know now, we still have much to learn about ourselves.
I'm not even trying to reply to every single one of you. Just let me give an... basic answer to the problem here.
I write what is in my head. I'm not going to change anything because some of you think its not fitting, its bad or simply not your taste. As somepony wrote, I write how I please and I'm my own mare after all.
So please, get out through the door if you don't like it before said door hits you hard.
I mean no offense, but please turn on that thing you call brain to think how the author feels about your personal opinion if it is negative and straight to the muzzle.
Now to a few special ones. 7192991 Who ever said that they have the same? Besides, AJ was clearly talking about ponies and ponies alone, thank you.
7192949 True. I do what I want anyways^^ But yes, criticism is GOOD, but not in some ways displayed here.
7191910 Thank you. It really seems like some of them only quickly skip over the chapters to complain later that they missed something.
7191832 It's all just about how you view it. The last chapters gave more than enough opportunity to see what will come or not. Guess some just thought they will be friends, hugging, be totally happy, yada, yada, yada
7192613 You are boring me, thank you very much. The conflict was mentioned CHAPTERS ago, so please, if you don't like it, downvote the story and just go. I won't change ANYTHING because you think what I write is stupid and boring. How would you feel if I see that the work you've wrote for plenty of your precious time is stupid and boring?
I think I'm done now. Yes, some of you might be offensed, but I'm done with this magic kindergarten here. Like the story and continue, or please leave if you think like Haldrake. Thank you
This I can't help but agree with. It's a magical pony land. I'm not going to say "don't do that" (I liked out.of.character, rules are made to be broken, etc.), but I am going to say that anti-gay bigotry in Equestria makes little sense, is kind of cliche'd, and just... Ugh. I don't think it's a great direction to drag the story in, or a great plot point to bring up. Not only is there the issue of "where do we go from here" (I have just about never seen a story with this as the central conflict be resolved in a good way), but there's also the bigger issue.
This plotline is particularly bad because it's not just some random other pony. It's not Mayor Mare. It's not Cranky. I'd even let someone like Big Mac or Grannie Smith slide. But Rarity and Applejack? Really? "Hey, let's take these great characters who are known quite literally as avatars of friendship and portray them as, respectively, a country hick who can't see past her own baseless prejudices, and a high society snob who thinks appearances are more important than friendship." That last one, by the way, was actually a major character arc of Rarity's in a couple of episodes, and she pretty clearly pulled through. It just feels woefully out of character. It works with the alternate universe characters because, well, alternate universe, not everything is the same, relationships are different, cultural attitudes are different, et cetera. But these guys? I'm sorry, I do not believe that homosexuality is particularly rare in a town with a mare-stallion ratio as skewed as ponyville. And I really don't believe that Applejack would just ditch her friends because she can't handle their relationship. Nothing in the canon of this story has given me any reason to believe that.
But okay, whatever, I personally do not like the plot point, but it's not unsalvageable, and I trust that the story is in good hands...
7193149 7193207 I took this story to do you a favor. I work six days a week with mostly twelve hours per day Plus I got my own stories to write. Accept what I deliver or don't It's easy, really, that's why I also don't bother if you like what I write or not.
There is a difference between constructive criticism and just being a dick for dicks' sake.
Declaring something clichéd or hackneyed does not automagically make it so. Nor do blanket declarations qualify as "constructive."
Even something that qualifies as a cliché can still be true. The cliché keeps being told because...people actually act that way. Behavior is not always rational. Everyone has deep seated assumptions about something, and when something challenges those assumptions, they may react poorly.
Saying something has no place in Equestria isn't an argument. It's an opinion, and a very subjective one at that. Tough to support, even: Equestria is a very bigoted place. Everything from blankflank bullying to racism against zebras and griffins is CANON. Good settings are complex and open to varied interpretation. How dare you imply there is only one correct way for fan writers to interpret Equestria?
Someone pointed out the human Rarity obviously got over her problem at some point, so maybe pony Rarity will, too. That seems likely to me. Some people can grow and overcome their reactions. That is known as personal growth, which you can't have if your character is already a caricature of perfection in all things. Good characters have to make dumb mistakes from time to time, or they just aren't believable.
What this event does is it manages to imply character development without having to delve into exposition, and sets up an expectation for future development, again without exposition. Which is the hallmark of good writing...nobody likes wading through endless expository blabbering. We want action! It's how we're wired.
Scratch is doing better than fine with this so far. Not liking it because it challenges your views of what Equestria should be like is fine; even not liking it because you think the story should go in a different direction is fine. But being a diamond dog dick about it isn't.
7193149 7193207 Hm. I read your comments again and again, now I can't stop laughing. I should care about your critics? Why should I? You two did nothing but acting like dicks and insulting me. I don't care about your comments because you read one of my stories that's not even originally by me and insult me as a shit author. Here's the newsflash. I wrote 48 stories, so I don't give a damn bit if you are unhappy with me on this here.
Insulting an author over one of her stories is blind and shortsighted, plus shows a good encourage in you to simply talk shit.
Insulting an author because she isn't reacting like the former author and trying to measure her in that is even more dumb.
Glad we talked it out.
7193586 I accept that everypony got their own mind in what they think is good, bad, or other things. I do not accept if I get insulted because some pony reads only one single story while ignoring my 48 and declare me a shit writer. Thanks for sticking with me all the time, I know it's not easy^^
While it seems like the typical cliché, TDF and I had plans with it. Some seemed to expect that everything would be fine, everypony simply accepting it in a heart touching, friendship moment. That would be a lie and insult to AJ's character foremost. Sometimes I think everypony only cares about the things they want to see. Not what the author wants to write.
Anyways, thank you
At least one knowing me a bit and sticking to more stories from me.
7194485 I was entirely willing to give this whole thing a pass until I saw how you responded to constructive criticism. That's not a good way to respond to constructive criticism. And I feel like my criticism is, indeed, constructive. At least Rarity is acting woefully out of character. I literally do not believe that Rarity, as written here, is the same character from the show who stood up to the Canterlot elite to defend the honor of her friends. It feels entirely like you've turned two of the Mane Six into bigots because... Plot. Not for any reasons that make sense to those characters as they are established in the canon or even in your own story, but just so that we can have a flashpoint. That's not a good idea. You seriously need to humanize these two at some point, because right now it just seems like they're being jerks to their very closest friends just for the sake of being jerks to move the plot along.
Like I said, none of this is likely to be a dealbreaker. I've seen worse story hiccups (hell, I've written worse story hiccups, and then immediately regretted it and wished I could un-publish a chapter to change it). But taking constructive criticism is an important skill everywhere, especially in writing. Telling people offering constructive criticism to fuck off in the most arrogant way possible, especially when you're a new writer on the project and the old writer did take criticism... That's not a good idea. I fully accept that you are probably a better writer than me, and definitely a more famous and prolific one. But it seems like you're making a mistake, and you ought to tread carefully.
7194531 I don't think you get what I mean but okay. Midknight made a few points you should read. Canon isn't canon. Have a character act oh so glory towards her best friends without noting her personality is a lie. Remember how Rarity thinks about relationship and how she viewed them until that point. Best example is Blue Blood.
And again I remind you that this is one story you're judging me about. It is the same if i just judged you over Play me like a Cello and would give a buck about the rest.
What the hap crappened to Twidashforever?
EDIT: WHAT.
7190211
You missed like.... everything!
Look here
7190216
WELL, DAMN.
Breaks my heart to see persistence drop like a rock in the ocean.
Ah well, hope you do well in the following days.
May experience be with you!
7190234
Yeah it's sad.
I'll definitely do my best
7190244 I apparently have no responsibilities here, what-so-ever.
wooooooooooooooooow. Some friends AJ and Rarity were. A bunch of asses.
Also, It's so sad TwiDashfoever is gone. I truly enjoyed his/her work.
I have some great High hopes you'll finish this story ScratchnTavi. Since you were the co-writer of this story, I know you'll make this story as good as Twidash would have make it. I'll be routing for you my friend, and I'll be looking forward to the next update.
I'm sorry that Twidashforever decided to throw in the towel.
Even so, thankyou for at least taking on this story, as many enjoyable ones are simply
doomed to be forever unfinished.
Also... Rarity & AJ are arseholes.
Yep, as much as it was foreshadowed and hinted at, I'm still kind of taken aback by the flat out refusal of their relationship by AJ and Rarity.
To be honest, I'm surprised the endorsement of Celestia and Luna on the grounds of it being more common in the past would have had more traction.
It'll be interesting to see how they get through this, the support of themselves should be the deciding factor.
Welcome to the story, looks like you're off to a good start. ^^
Sigh, emotional Cliffhanger... It seems that it's not going to be easy for them.
The story's definitely in good hands. Thanks a lot for stepping up; I would have been sad to see this go unfinished.
different author but the same story just a different style and I still like it good work.
7190295
Seems like it
7190304
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7190406
Thank you for the support!
I'll try to keep it in good shape, but it really means a lot to me that you stick with it, even with me on your horseshoes now
Diffrent style but still briliant. The story is in good hands.
Well...............
At least we know they patch things up with Rarity.
I don't get it, I mean I knew Applejack would be a problem, but Rarity? In the other world she made those really expensive clothes for Twi and Rainbow was going to model for her for a whole summer. How can there be any issues there?
7190437 next few chapters please if u can find the time to do so that is
Don't sweat it, you're a perfect replacement author.
7190520
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7190574
Thanks!
7190527
Seems like you missed some context from the earlier chapters.
Rarity was having a fit as well before they became friends again in the human world
7190525
With time, with time ^^
Great Chapter... Sad That TwiDashForever threw in the towel... but i can understand conpletely... Darn you Josh habier... though i did love Friendship Games.... though Starlight is killing Season 6 For me.. the really need to remove her all she is is a Sunset Shimmer Clone.. and that ain't good... ain't good at all..
I have to agree, great chapter. While I also find it sad that Twidashforever is gone, you're doing a good job ScratchnTavi.
On a humorous note: I bet AJ is just pissed of because of jealousy. I could imagine that she had the hots for Dash but couldn't muster the courage to ask her out. Well, now her chances are gone. Too bad, so sad.
Just joking but who knows, right?
7190527
Well if the reading of the story is what I think it is, it's not the homosexuality that is the issue for Rarity but the choice of partners.
With Rainbow Dash being too crude and brash for a Princess like Twilight.
7190607 time heals all -^- (sometimes :/)
7190607
To be honest, I hate Judgmental Applejack and Rarity with every fiber of my being; however, it's just such a damn good plot point that I can't complain!
I still want to hit them upside the head for being so damn judgmental.
I'm seriously hoping that Luna visits Applejack in a dream to inquire about her position, and see what she can do to help out her friends. She's got a vested, personal interest in the matter and all.
7190847 I thought that too, but that doesn't fit the equivilent in the other world. Twilight is just a student there, so saying that Rainbow isn't good enough for you is even more insulting. Why would Rainbow continue to be friends (or more accurately path up a friendship) with someone who thought that. I mean, it would still pretty insulting for pony Rarity to think something like that, it's like saying 'you're not good enough for a Princess', real nice thing to say to a friends. I don't think Rarity would quite think that way.
I have loved this story since I started reading the first chapter of the first part. I can tell you that I feel the difference with your writing. If I had to sum it up your style is more... playful jovial. Its lighter closer to the cartoon at least that's what I felt from this chapter even with the emotional weight at the end. Overall I like it.
As my brother stated-it's no less good. Just different. I'm looking forward to see where things go from here.
Guuuh... I was worried about this since Celestia was less than enthused. This should have ended up a joke and not serious drama.
Gayngst and bigotry have no place in Equestria.
None.
Judging people on who they love has no business in a world where Love can be tangibly, and physically made manifest.
Which is why it should have been a joke. Something along the lines of Twi and Rainbow being gobsmacked when the pony Rarity and Applejack are all smiles and happy words for the new couple. Instead we get... shit that should never be written in this setting. I'd be willing to bet fully half the stories on this site with a Romance tag have some measure of this kind of drama, and I, for one, am well and truly sick of it. I know you authors have the creativity to not go for the low hanging fruit of Romantic drama, but you guys do it all the fucking time anyway.
For the third time, that kind of bigotry has no place in the setting of My Little Pony. I like reading fantasy to get away from the dumb ideas humans have, not see it rehashed over and over and over and over in stories with otherwise unique and interesting concepts.
Ugh...
/rant
That all said, I didn't see anything wrong with the switch from TDF. From a writing standpoint this chapter was as top-notch as ever, it was the content that cheesed me off.
7191594
I can't hear you over the sound of it's his story and he's writing it how he pleases.
If you don't like it, don't read it. Comments are always good, but at least make them constructive, not just a rant telling the author that they made a stupid decision. Especially since you don't live in Equestria, and therefore have zero right to tell anybody anything about how life works there.
Honestly.
You know, we had hoped that the most obvious plot wouldn't have been used, as it's more entertaining to have the unexpected. Equestria just got a bit darker, both from this and poor TwiDashForever.
Oh well, things move on, hopefully with the humans as guides maybe relationships can be salvaged better this time around?
Keep going! ;)
After reading some comments about AJ and Rarity, I decided to throw my 5 cents to it.
Honestly, I don't find it weird that AJ and Rarity are not exactly happy over the fact, that Twilight and Dash are in relationship. AJ is a simple farm girl and judging by my own expirience (I live on a countryside), people who are raised here are like that as well. Of course i'm not generalising and saying that everyone is like that, but you know what I mean.
Rarity on the other hand... I'm gonna go with something someone else wrote that she is more concered about who is Princess in relationship with instead of that relationship being homosexual. It seems like a fair point and for me suits her personality well.
And some would say that "Equestria should be more open-minded and stuff!". I'd have to disagree on that. Why? Well, even though it's a fantasy land with anthropomorfic magical horses... their way of thinking and understanding is very simmilar to ours. So of course there will be ponies who do and don't agree with that kind of relationships. We just think they would be since we're so used to see tons of same sex sipping fanictions/artwork. It's kinda like in Touhou fandom. Touhou is a series of bullet hell shooters, which cast is almost entirely female, and because of that, majority of shipping type artwork is describing them as lesbians, to the point that there's even a joke "Everybody is gay in Gensokyo!" (Gensokyo is a place of action in Touhou series).
And you know what? As much as I don't like people, who will say things like AJ or Rarity, I like it in the fic. It adds some realism to that. Because let's be honest, another story where the forrbiden friut kind of a relationship will work just fine without any difficulties, would be just boring. We live in a world where gay people have problems like that sooner or later. I wish they hadn't, but well, what can you do. And the fact that Equestria, the land of fantasy also have problems like that? Fine by me. If these technicolor horses are simmilar to us humans in the way they act and think, it's only natural that things like that will occur.
Well. I thought this story was in good hooves before. Now I know it.
You got the tone of their banter just right, Scratchy. :) It flows well with the previous chapters.
And for the neighsayers below, I will say: you guys sure missed a lot of telegraphing. AJ/Raritys' likely initial reactions have been mentioned numerous times before this. This was actually milder than I feared it might be. Friends can come back from this yet. Nothing irrevocable has been said.
Now, being a pony lovey happy story, there is hope that they will realize they are being silly and snap out of it eventually, but that's for the future, when the laws of character development and plot necessity demand it.
Well fuck, that's a sudden change. I didn't expect TDF to leave like that (plus, I liked FG more than than the previous movies...).
I have to assume some shit happened in his life too for the sudden 180 but I understand.
And hey, as long as this continues, I don't mind, plus Scratchtavia is a good ship too :3.
Hmm guess I did miss that T~T but the stories are still there and they are all complete so small yay.
Called AJ but was surprised about Rarity since positive interactions in TtLG but seems things will get better. I am hoping that they can patch things up.
Seems interesting that (as presented in the show) with such a seemingly huge gender imbalance that mare/mare relationships would be taboo. Guess there is just a huge hidden make population that is never talked about.
I like your style. It shows promise and that the story won't suffer for the change. Kudos for that
About the chapter... Indeed, out was rather telegraphed. Nothing wrong about that, or about their reactions in the first moment, when there's been no time to think and emotions rule.
On the long run though I quite expect it to progress differently from the human 'verse. Mostly because "immortal goddess support". Rarity refusal seems to come from a heavily story-influenced view in romance and what's " proper". It will be quite hard for her to keep any kind of refusal when the ones that rather define what's right or wrong come and say "yeah, there's nothing wrong with that, we actually support it".
Applejack's comes from tradition... Another that had already been shown to be fake. How can she say it's wrong when the immortal rulers say it only fell out of practice in " recent " times? Kinda hard to use "tradition" and "what is right" when those same things are thrown into your face and proven wrong. Of course, being stubborn as she is it will still take quite some time for her to come around... But most likely it will be somewhat faster and more completely than the human one.
All in all, princesses from thousands of years past change both arguments/beliefs rather drastically. I'm not going to assume it will progress exactly out even somewhat like that... But disconsider their influence when the moral qualms are rather connected with their presence, importance and life span wouldn't be good for the story, I believe. Ponies are quite human though, so when they don't want to see they won't, but when you don't have religion to be the base of a belief on a way that can't be countered because of its "divine" nature it becomes quite harder for that belief not to crumble. Simple societal norms are harder to hold when the ones who rather define them go against you.
I'd say I'm anxiously waiting to see how you're going to develop this in a non "this is exactly what happened to the humans" way. THAT would be lazy writing, no offense intended.
Edit: some grammar corrections. Darn phones
7191757
You sound incredibly foolish talking about criticism that way on a creative medium website.
You make it sound like any criticism is inherently useless because "the author can write what they want to write."
But.. you're wrong. Like, stupidly wrong.
Criticism also doesn't mean someone suddenly hates something. Far from it, I was being very critical because I've been reading since TLG started last Summer. I'm pretty heavily invested in this story, at this point, and I want it to be the best it can be. Does that make me entitled to the story panning out how I would like? Fuck no. Am I entitled to my opinion about how things could be made better and the ability to express that opinion? Absofuckinglutely.
You also seem to have dodged the crux of my criticism because you disagree with my assessment of Equestria. The way love working in the show meaning there shouldn't be bigotry over same-sex couples is my personal interpretation. Gayngst and bigotry being used as a source of conflict in a romance story in FimFiction being tired, overused, and cliche, is an objective fact. One that I know TDF/SnT could have worked around.
They were a team that created a conflict in the previous story where Twilight goes into heat and is in utter misery. Turning sex from one of the things that partially defines these two humans lives into torture that's hurting themselves and their new friends.
That was fucking brilliant.
This newest conflict is stupid and boring.
7192613
No, it's NOT an objective fact. I fucking hate the "Oh, it's a cliche" argument. Do you know how many movies, books, games, etc. are based on cliches? How many of those are amazing films or whatever? A lot of them. Cliche doesn't mean bad.
If it's something you're tired of reading, too bad. It doesn't mean it's automatically a bad choice.
And I most certainly DID NOT make it sound like criticism is inherently useless. If that's how you felt, then I'm sorry, but that is most certainly not what I wrote. I simply told you that telling an author that they made a stupid decision is unhelpful. (Meanwhile, you respond by telling me that I'm just stupid. How very uninspired.)
And yes, it's still just your interpretation, as you even agreed. So at least we've buried that issue.
As for your last entry. Maybe you should learn that just calling something "stupid" isn't going to help anybody. Because seriously, that's apparently your new favorite word.
7192800
Your first sentence
Outright says that criticism is useless. That it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks, if that's how the writer wants to write it, then it's inherently correct. How else am I supposed to interpret that?
And yes, maybe I used "stupid" a few too many times, but it's an apt word for the idea that I was trying to express. Namely, that the things I labelled stupid "lacked in thought, intelligence, or sense".
You're also absolutely right. Cliches are used for a reason. They work, much of the time, and sometimes even serve an important purpose for creating the proper tone and atmosphere in a given work, by building on a readers preconceived notions and experience with said cliches.
But that doesn't mean that they're always acceptable. Like I said, I have bigger expectations out of this fic than rehashing the same old shit. That doesn't mean the author is required to meet my expectations, the only reason that would ever be fair is if I personally commissioned the work. But I was compelled to express my displeasure because I know for certain that they could have come up with a better, less overused, form of interpersonal conflict that would have been truer to the story, setting, and even my own expectations, lofty though they apparently are.
I'm passionate about this story, and that passion may have made me sound like a dick, and I'm sorry for that, but I staunchly stand by my opinion that this was a foolish turn for the story, and something better should have been in its place.
7192907
No, no it really doesn't. It says that the author is entitled to writing how he pleases. I even then went on in the next sentence to say how constructive criticism is GOOD. The author is, in the immortal words of Gaiman, "Not your bitch".
I guess our animal kingdom really is different then theirs. I have been taking Psychology for some time now and I have been learning that the animal kingdom is not all that straight. Ducks mate changes with the wind. Swans are actually more commonly gay then you would think, cats have this tendency as well.
Sure they can't reproduce so in that way it seems weird, but in actuality its just something society came up with the conclusion: everything is supposed to be straight.
If you think that is crazy, try convincing someone your door does not swing at all or that you are a loner completely happy being single the rest of your life. All I am saying is that even with everything we know now, we still have much to learn about ourselves.
I'm not even trying to reply to every single one of you.
Just let me give an... basic answer to the problem here.
I write what is in my head. I'm not going to change anything because some of you think its not fitting, its bad or simply not your taste. As somepony wrote, I write how I please and I'm my own mare after all.
So please, get out through the door if you don't like it before said door hits you hard.
I mean no offense, but please turn on that thing you call brain to think how the author feels about your personal opinion if it is negative and straight to the muzzle.
Now to a few special ones.
7192991
Who ever said that they have the same?
Besides, AJ was clearly talking about ponies and ponies alone, thank you.
7192949
True. I do what I want anyways^^ But yes, criticism is GOOD, but not in some ways displayed here.
7191910
Thank you. It really seems like some of them only quickly skip over the chapters to complain later that they missed something.
7191832
It's all just about how you view it.
The last chapters gave more than enough opportunity to see what will come or not.
Guess some just thought they will be friends, hugging, be totally happy, yada, yada, yada
7192613
You are boring me, thank you very much.
The conflict was mentioned CHAPTERS ago, so please, if you don't like it, downvote the story and just go.
I won't change ANYTHING because you think what I write is stupid and boring.
How would you feel if I see that the work you've wrote for plenty of your precious time is stupid and boring?
I think I'm done now.
Yes, some of you might be offensed, but I'm done with this magic kindergarten here.
Like the story and continue, or please leave if you think like Haldrake.
Thank you
7193048
Well, I guess that's it for this fic then. Your writing may be technically fine, but your attitude makes you a seriously shit writer.
TDF addressed criticism and opened dialogue even with the worst detractors, all while keeping an air of humility and good humor.
You decided to single me out and literally tell me to fuck off?
Get over yourself you fucking prima donna.
7191594
This I can't help but agree with. It's a magical pony land. I'm not going to say "don't do that" (I liked out.of.character, rules are made to be broken, etc.), but I am going to say that anti-gay bigotry in Equestria makes little sense, is kind of cliche'd, and just... Ugh. I don't think it's a great direction to drag the story in, or a great plot point to bring up. Not only is there the issue of "where do we go from here" (I have just about never seen a story with this as the central conflict be resolved in a good way), but there's also the bigger issue.
This plotline is particularly bad because it's not just some random other pony. It's not Mayor Mare. It's not Cranky. I'd even let someone like Big Mac or Grannie Smith slide. But Rarity and Applejack? Really? "Hey, let's take these great characters who are known quite literally as avatars of friendship and portray them as, respectively, a country hick who can't see past her own baseless prejudices, and a high society snob who thinks appearances are more important than friendship." That last one, by the way, was actually a major character arc of Rarity's in a couple of episodes, and she pretty clearly pulled through. It just feels woefully out of character. It works with the alternate universe characters because, well, alternate universe, not everything is the same, relationships are different, cultural attitudes are different, et cetera. But these guys? I'm sorry, I do not believe that homosexuality is particularly rare in a town with a mare-stallion ratio as skewed as ponyville. And I really don't believe that Applejack would just ditch her friends because she can't handle their relationship. Nothing in the canon of this story has given me any reason to believe that.
But okay, whatever, I personally do not like the plot point, but it's not unsalvageable, and I trust that the story is in good hands...
7193048
...With an author who cannot respond to constructive criticism at all. Oog. That... is unlikely to end well.
7193149
7193207
I took this story to do you a favor.
I work six days a week with mostly twelve hours per day
Plus I got my own stories to write.
Accept what I deliver or don't
It's easy, really, that's why I also don't bother if you like what I write or not.
Literally =
pre11.deviantart.net/e19f/th/pre/i/2011/330/a/e/rainbow_dash___deal_with_it_by_bossluigi-d4hfeg7.png
>>Haledrake
There is a difference between constructive criticism and just being a dick for dicks' sake.
Declaring something clichéd or hackneyed does not automagically make it so. Nor do blanket declarations qualify as "constructive."
Even something that qualifies as a cliché can still be true. The cliché keeps being told because...people actually act that way. Behavior is not always rational. Everyone has deep seated assumptions about something, and when something challenges those assumptions, they may react poorly.
Saying something has no place in Equestria isn't an argument. It's an opinion, and a very subjective one at that. Tough to support, even: Equestria is a very bigoted place. Everything from blankflank bullying to racism against zebras and griffins is CANON. Good settings are complex and open to varied interpretation. How dare you imply there is only one correct way for fan writers to interpret Equestria?
Someone pointed out the human Rarity obviously got over her problem at some point, so maybe pony Rarity will, too. That seems likely to me. Some people can grow and overcome their reactions. That is known as personal growth, which you can't have if your character is already a caricature of perfection in all things. Good characters have to make dumb mistakes from time to time, or they just aren't believable.
What this event does is it manages to imply character development without having to delve into exposition, and sets up an expectation for future development, again without exposition. Which is the hallmark of good writing...nobody likes wading through endless expository blabbering. We want action! It's how we're wired.
Scratch is doing better than fine with this so far. Not liking it because it challenges your views of what Equestria should be like is fine; even not liking it because you think the story should go in a different direction is fine. But being a diamond dog dick about it isn't.
7193149
7193207
Hm. I read your comments again and again, now I can't stop laughing.
I should care about your critics? Why should I?
You two did nothing but acting like dicks and insulting me.
I don't care about your comments because you read one of my stories that's not even originally by me and insult me as a shit author.
Here's the newsflash.
I wrote 48 stories, so I don't give a damn bit if you are unhappy with me on this here.
Insulting an author over one of her stories is blind and shortsighted, plus shows a good encourage in you to simply talk shit.
Insulting an author because she isn't reacting like the former author and trying to measure her in that is even more dumb.
Glad we talked it out.
7193586
I accept that everypony got their own mind in what they think is good, bad, or other things.
I do not accept if I get insulted because some pony reads only one single story while ignoring my 48 and declare me a shit writer.
Thanks for sticking with me all the time, I know it's not easy^^
While it seems like the typical cliché, TDF and I had plans with it.
Some seemed to expect that everything would be fine, everypony simply accepting it in a heart touching, friendship moment.
That would be a lie and insult to AJ's character foremost.
Sometimes I think everypony only cares about the things they want to see.
Not what the author wants to write.
Anyways, thank you
At least one knowing me a bit and sticking to more stories from me.
7194485
I was entirely willing to give this whole thing a pass until I saw how you responded to constructive criticism. That's not a good way to respond to constructive criticism. And I feel like my criticism is, indeed, constructive. At least Rarity is acting woefully out of character. I literally do not believe that Rarity, as written here, is the same character from the show who stood up to the Canterlot elite to defend the honor of her friends. It feels entirely like you've turned two of the Mane Six into bigots because... Plot. Not for any reasons that make sense to those characters as they are established in the canon or even in your own story, but just so that we can have a flashpoint. That's not a good idea. You seriously need to humanize these two at some point, because right now it just seems like they're being jerks to their very closest friends just for the sake of being jerks to move the plot along.
Like I said, none of this is likely to be a dealbreaker. I've seen worse story hiccups (hell, I've written worse story hiccups, and then immediately regretted it and wished I could un-publish a chapter to change it). But taking constructive criticism is an important skill everywhere, especially in writing. Telling people offering constructive criticism to fuck off in the most arrogant way possible, especially when you're a new writer on the project and the old writer did take criticism... That's not a good idea. I fully accept that you are probably a better writer than me, and definitely a more famous and prolific one. But it seems like you're making a mistake, and you ought to tread carefully.
7194531
I don't think you get what I mean but okay.
Midknight made a few points you should read.
Canon isn't canon.
Have a character act oh so glory towards her best friends without noting her personality is a lie. Remember how Rarity thinks about relationship and how she viewed them until that point. Best example is Blue Blood.
And again I remind you that this is one story you're judging me about.
It is the same if i just judged you over Play me like a Cello and would give a buck about the rest.
Have a nice day
Man we already have to deal with TDF leaving, can we please not have drama for now? ;_;