Rainbow Dash and the Treasure of Canterlot

by Insert Pen Name

Part VII: Last Dying Image

Rainbow Dash and the Treasure of Canterlot

Part VII: Last Dying Image

A FiM fic by (Insert Pen Name)

Rainbow Dash woke up and was instantly struck by what could only be justifiably described as the god-king of all headaches. Her initial impression was that she must be hungover, but a quick survey of her surroundings soon dispelled this notion. For one thing, it was still late afternoon, not the morning after. For another, she was lying on the gravel shore of a river, which was inconsistent with her previous hangovers. Normally she would wake up somewhere much more comfortable, such as a tree, or a cloud, or in some other pony’s bed, usually Pinkie Pie’s or Fluttershy’s (though each for very different reasons). The most compelling piece of evidence, however, was the fact that she remembered quite clearly the events that had brought her to this situation.

“The Crest!” she gasped, sitting bolt upright.

There was no response to her outburst, merely the roar of water cascading down the mountainside. High above Dash could see the outcrop upon which the waterfall began, and the full implications of what had just occurred to her suddenly struck home.

“I just went over a waterfall,” murmured Dash incredulously. “Rainbow Dash, the best flyer in Equestria, went over a freakin’ waterfall! The Wonderbolts better not hear about this...”

Putting aside that particular scenario, Dash got to her feet and trudged further down the beach, where the overturned wreck of the boat lay broken in the gravel. Dash paid it no heed, for just beyond, a powder-blue unicorn was stumbling furiously across the beach, hoof outstretched, towards a bright and distinctive glint of silver beneath the tattered remains of a torn saddlebag...

“Almost there...” thought Trixie. “Trixie almost has you... just a little-”

Her inner monologue was suddenly cut short by the appearance of a blue hoof that was not her own. Rainbow had swiftly and cooly manoeuvred herself ahead of Trixie, and now brought her hoof down on the Crest just as the unicorn reached it. With trembling, pitiful eyes, Trixie gazed up into the determined face of a mare who would have done Daring Do proud.

“Give it up Trixie,” said Dash warningly. “It’s over.”

For a long moment, the two mares exchanged challenging glares, until Trixie finally backed down and broke the pegasus’ gaze. Then she spoke, her voice tired and strained.

“Alright... you win...” she said as she withdrew her hoof.

And then her horn suddenly lit up.

“Loser!”

Dash let out a cry of pain as a magically propelled river rock slammed into the side of her head. Stunned, the pegasus crumpled to the ground, a trickle of blood running down the side of her face as Trixie knelt down and picked up the White Crest in her magic.

“Idiot. Did you really think The Great and Powerful Trixie would just give up without a fight?” snorted the haughty magician, her voice filled with malice. “And Trixie isn’t done yet; after everything you’ve put her through, well, let’s just say that Trixie is going to enjoy this...”

A sudden rage filled Dash, and with a roar she leapt at Trixie with hooves outstretched. The villainous unicorn dodged her clumsy attack with ease, and Dash plowed into the gravel beach behind her.

“Oh, did that hurt?” jeered Trixie. “You really want this trinket back, don’t you? Well by all means, go ahead and take it!”

Dash raised her head just in time to see Trixie charging towards her, the White Crest held high above her head, and her eyes filled with the glint of a mind that was no longer quite there. With a deranged yell, Trixie swung the Crest downwards, and Dash instinctively closed her eyes, bracing herself for the impact.

It never came.

Daring a look, Dash saw the blunt edge of the Crest hovering just over her head, still gripped in the glow of Trixie’s magic yet refusing to budge another inch. Unfazed, Trixie withdrew her “weapon” and swung again at Dash’s head, and again the Crest came to a sudden halt just before it struck. Another swing from the desperate unicorn, and again the same result.

“What the...?” gasped Trixie in between swings. “Why... won’t... this... thing... oof!”

Dash took advantage of Trixie’s distraction to land a solid punch directly on the magician’s face. Stunned Trixie dropped the Crest and fell on her rump, bringing a hoof up to gingerly nurse her bloody nose. With a triumphant huff, Dash knelt down and took the Crest between her teeth. She was briefly tempted to continue her assault upon the hapless unicorn, but the feeling soon passed as quickly as it had come. Instead, she merely spread her wings, shook them dry, and she was off.

Blinking, Trixie suddenly returned to her senses.

“W-what?! Get back here you! Trixie is not finished with you! Trixie will get hers back for this, you hear?! The Great and Powerful Trixie will, have, her, revaaah, who am I kidding?” she said bitterly to herself.

Pulling herself up, Trixie trudged over to where her bag still lay on the shore and pulled out a battered star-spangled cloak. Drawing the garment around her shoulders, Trixie began the long walk back to Fillydelphia. Once there, she would have to find a new and hopefully less painful method to get her caravan out of impound, but that is another story...

* * *

The sun was beginning to set by the time Rainbow finally returned to Canterlot Chapel. With the Crest still clenched between her teeth, she hurried through the empty chambers and passages until she reached the room where Fancy Pants had fallen. No sooner had she burst through the door when she was engulfed in a screaming blur of orange fur.

“Rainbow Dash! You’re back!”

Scootaloo was soon followed by Twilight, who pulled Rainbow into a light hug of her own.

“Did you get it?” she asked.

Dash, the Crest still gripped between her teeth, merely narrowed her eyes in response.

“Oh. Sorry,” said Twilight sheepishly as she took the Crest from Dash.

Relieved of her precious cargo, Dash pushed past Twilight into the room. Fancy Pants lay in the centre of the floor, labouring for breath as two nurses tended to him with dampened cloths and grave faces.

“Looks like Scootaloo got help alright,” remarked Dash.

“Oh she did far better than that,” said a serene voice from behind.

A regal white alicorn who had been standing patiently in the corner stepped forward into the light, but Dash was too tired to be surprised, let alone bow. The Princess’s face betrayed the same grim expression as the nurses’, and it was with a lump in her throat that Dash turned to the subject of Fancy Pants.

“How is he?” asked Rainbow.

“Not good,” said Celestia gravely. “I have done what I could to comfort him, but I’m afraid that there is little else we can do.”

“Can’t you use your Princess magic?” asked Scootaloo.

“It would do no good, my little pony,” answered Celestia. “At this point, the spell would be more than his body could take. I’m sorry.”

Celestia’s grave words provoked a fresh sob from the filly, who quickly buried herself in Twilight’s waiting shoulder. While the two ponies comforted one another, Dash stepped forward to where Fancy Pants lay. The wounded stallion was clearly in dire straits; the bruises along his body had only worsened and he struggled to lift his head to address the young pegasus.

“Miss Dash?” he croaked.

“Right here,” said Dash. “Uh, how’re you holding up?” she added awkwardly.

Fancy Pants gave a grim chuckle.

“I think we both know the answer to that,” he said finally. “Ironic, isn’t it? For so long I wanted to hold a piece of history... and now I am about to become history.”

The stallion broke into a coughing fit that sent chills down Dash’s spine. Fighting back tears, she turned to Twilight and pulled the White Crest from the unicorn’s grasp. Before Twilight could protest, Dash stepped forward and lay the Crest upon Fancy Pants’ chest.

“Here, it’s the least I can do,” said Dash quietly.

Fancy Pants said nothing, but merely clutched the Crest to his body as he struggled to breathe. Eventually he spoke again.

“I... I am sorry, Miss Dash... I’m sorry I let you down... You are a true archaeologist, you know that? You set out to discover the past, to bring it back for all to know... And all I wanted was to keep it for myself.”

The stallion wheezed for a bit, then turned to the sympathetic face of Celestia.

“Princess... I’ve been so foolish... so vain... so selfish...” he said sadly. “Can you forgive me, my Princess? Forgive an old fool his petty mistakes?”

Celestia gave a teary smile, then gently placed her gilded hoof over the Crest.

“I forgive you, Fancy Pants,” she said. “Rest easy, my friend.”

Fancy Pants smiled, then lay back as if to sleep, but suddenly broke again into another fit of wheezing coughs.

“Oh no,” sobbed Twilight. “Not like this.”

But Fancy Pants continued to cough, louder and more violently now. Suddenly he sat up, still coughing, as he let the Crest fall from his grasp and instead began pounding his free hoof upon his chest as if to dislodge something in his throat.

“Wait, what the...?”

“Look!” said Scootaloo.

The bruises that had marred Fancy Pants’ body only moments before were now retreating in on themselves. The stallion appeared to be gaining strength, though his coughing continued. Finally, with one last shuddering cough, Fancy Pants struggled to his feet and proceeded to violently hork a large glob of phlegm onto the floor beside him.

“Eeewww!” recoiled Scootaloo.

“He’s alive!” shouted Rainbow. “Oh my gosh, he’s alive!”

“What?! But how?!” cried Twilight. “You don’t think...?”

The unicorn’s gaze fell on the Crest. In a flurry of energy, Twilight seized the artifact and began running her magical touch over its surface. Meanwhile, as Fancy Pants regained his breath, Celestia approached the miraculously convalescent stallion with an intrigued expression.

“Fancy Pants?” asked Celestia softly. “How... how do you feel?”

“I feel... fine,” said Fancy Pants finally. “In fact, I feel better than fine, I feel alive. I don’t know what you did, but I haven’t felt this good in years. Why I even feel like... dancing... my word, when was the last time I took Fleur dancing? Well, I suppose I’ll just have to fix that little problem tonight, now won’t I?”

“Indeed,” smiled Celestia. “Well, I won’t stop you, Fancy, though I must remind you that you did technically try to steal a priceless artifact about an hour or two ago.”

“Ah, well, I suppose we’ll just have to settle that up sometime tomorrow then, eh?” chuckled Fancy Pants nervously.

“I wouldn’t laugh too hard,” said Celestia. “I have a number of public works projects lined up in need of funding.”

Fancy Pants gulped.

“But for now, enjoy your evening,” said Celestia, stepping aside to allow the stallion to pass. “You’ve been through a lot today. And give my best wishes to Fleur.”

“Thank-you Princess,” said Fancy Pants with a low bow. “I shan’t soon forget the mercy you have shown me today. And as for you three,” he added, turning to Rainbow and Co. “I offer my humblest and most sincere apologies. Perhaps someday we’ll be able to look back on this over drinks and laugh.”

“Heh, whatever you say, Fancy,” laughed Rainbow.

Fancy Pants exchange further apologies with Twilight and Scootaloo, though the former was rather too preoccupied to respond. Scootaloo however, offered her forgiveness as well, and so it was that Fancy Pants departed the chapel with a free conscience and a thoroughly unexpected second chance at life.

Meanwhile, Twilight had concluded her examination of the Crest, and if anything was even more flummoxed as a result.

“I don’t get it!” she wailed, as she held the White Crest out before her. “This couldn’t have been it. I just scanned it, twice! It’s just a piece of metal; no enchantments or residual magic or anything!”

Smiling, Celestia reached out and gently took the Crest from Twilight’s grasp. She gazed idly at it for a moment before turning back to her student.

“Perhaps you are right, Twilight,” said Celestia patiently. “But then what would you say is to credit for Mr. Pants’ speedy recovery?”

“I don’t know,” gasped Twilight. “But it had to be some kind of magic, right?”

“Perhaps,” began Celestia. “Though I will point out that there are forces in this world older and more powerful than mere magic. I believe that point was demonstrated very clearly at your brother’s wedding.”

“So wait, the power of love saved him?” asked Scootaloo.

“Yeah right, this isn’t fantasy, Scoots,” laughed Rainbow.

“I suppose it is a mystery we’ll have to solve at a later time,” continued Celestia. “For now, I wouldn’t worry about it too much, my faithful student.”

“I guess,” conceded Twilight.

“But take heart, you three,” said Celestia brightly. “Don’t you realise? This is the White Crest! The legendary treasure of Princess Platinum! Lost to history for over two-thousand years, and now finally returned to us thanks to you! Twilight Sparkle, Rainbow Dash, Scootaloo; your names will be set in history as the intrepid explorers who bravely recovered the Treasure of Canterlot!”

“Cool!” squeaked Scootaloo.

“Awesome!” added Dash.

“It was our pleasure, Princess,” said Twilight with a bow.

“I wish I could offer you three a more ‘official’ reward at this time,” said Celestia. “But in light of recent events, perhaps it is best if this artifact is kept secret a little while longer. Don’t worry,” she added, noting the concerned looks upon our heroines’ faces, “when it is a quieter time, the White Crest will be placed in a place of honour for all to see. And you three will be the ones to unveil it! Now then, I wish I could stay and talk more, but royal duty calls. Good night, my little ponies.”

* * *

Celestia’s sun was nearing the horizon when the three ponies stepped back out into the street. Streaks of red and gold adorned the sky, soon to be replaced by the glittering jewels of Luna’s night.

“So, where to now?” asked Dash with a yawn, her pith helmet held beneath her wing.

“Back home?” suggested Twilight. “Maybe Pinkie Pie will throw us a party.”

“Sounds good to me!” said Scootaloo. “C’mon, I know the way!”

Before either mares could react, Scootaloo was already zipping down the street. Twilight sighed with an indulgent smile.

“Come on, we better go after her before she gets lost,” she said, chasing after the excited filly.

Dash merely laughed after her a moment, then paused to regard her battered pith helmet. Grinning to herself, she placed it smoothly atop her head, then hurried forth to join her two friends as they galloped off into the sunset.

~FIN~

Acknowledgements:

Obviously inspired by the adventures of Indiana Jones. The basic idea for the White Crest (White Christ) is borrowed from a (very poor) film adaptation of Farley Mowat’s Curse of the Viking Grave. My Little Pony is property of Hasbro and whoever else is involved as well. A big thank-you goes out to all my readers. You make it all worthwhile.

-the author

Comments

[Cobra 1]

767582
Who wouldn't. Raider's March is something I always think of when I see that Daring Do. That is the ultimate adventurer theme. Next thing I want to see Do meets Indy and Pitfall Harry.

[reader238]

although I am saddened that this has ended it has been a pleasure reading it. great job hope your future stories are just as awesome

[Majk]

Woooo good stuff!
This is what final Indiana Jones movie should be like, you...are...awesome.

[Xerzes]

"placed in a place of honor" is a little awkward. Not that I have an alternative to suggest.

Really fun story. Well done.

[Lium]

A satisfying ending to an excellent read.

[djthomp]

Great ending, great story, easily worth a spot on my user page wall of awesome stories.

[Lucky Roll]

And so the epic adventures of Twilight, Rainbow and Scootaloo conclude! I have already said, but I must say again, I really enjoyed the light-hearted mixture of adventure and comedy here. Reading Rainbow Dash and the Treasure of Canterlot was indeed a pleasure, even if it introduced a suprise Trixie out of the blue (by the way, why isn't she shown amongst the featured characters? As the major villain, she earned it, I think).

Also, Fancy Pants for the win. When he was revealed as an antagonist, every sign pointed towards a good old-fashioned hammy and clichéd protagonists vs villain scene, but it got nicely subverted by the fact that he was willing to listen to reason, and our heroes simply convinced him to behave more rational (he not having a real plan probably helped, though). Make no mistake, I, for one, am a big fan of "hammy and clichéd protagonists vs villain scenes" (provided they're played for laughs!), but this nice touch made me like your Fancy Pants. I was worried about him at the end, but thankfully, you remained faithful to the light-hearted genre, and didn't kill him. Yay!

There's only one part I disapprove of: we didn't get to know what, exactly is the MacGuffin, the White Crest. Why couldn't Trixie pummel Rainbow with it? Why did it heal Fancy Pants? There's something in the author's note about some viking curse or what, but I admit, I have no idea what that is. Don't give me that look, the fic wasn't labeled as a crossover!

But, other than that, it was really a pleasure to read this! Keep up the good work!

[Priest4hire]

It's a cross. Consider: "four narrow arms, set at right angles, with one arm longer than the other three." I must admit to my embarrassment that I didn't make the connection until the scene with the image of the sword in the stone. As in Excalibur and the Arthurian myth which is partly about the coming of Christianity and the decline of paganism along with the search for the Holy Grail. Then it clicked.

[ponyhailey]

Sequel, there needs to be a sequel. By the way, the was great.

[Slireon]

And it ended. Very Fun and very creative story. RD Surely approves!

[brad70505]

Good job sad it is over.

[xgfhj]

Well... I was compelled to read the whole thing but I didn’t like it. The problem I had with it was mostly that the comedy belittled the story, I couldn’t get into the action and adventure because the comedy kept making it look irrelevant or clichéd, and the comedy itself just wasn’t funny, to me at least. Oh and all those jibes about obscenities, like Scootaloo being an arsonist and Trixie being a murderer were unappreciated.

[meme-asaurus]

So much action! So much meta! So much lampshade hanging!

[Insert Pen Name]

882569 I'm sorry you didn't like it, but thanks anyway for giving it a fair shot.

[MacIsBest859]

878868
On your questions about the crest.

I just assumed it was Celestia the whole time, from the first chapter the whole thing just seemed like one of those things she does to teach someone a lesson.

I mean the slab thing that gets it started is in another language but written in Euqestrian
The slab was "Lost" (Or in my opinion fabricated)
Both Twilight and Dash are there probably only because she invited them
She made a special point out of showing up just at the right time to get it started
and made sure she was there in the end, but as usual for her she was just late enough to not actually have to do anything.

[Lucky Roll]

879562
I find your comment amusing in the light of your character name... But you seem to be right.

884990
I'm not entirely sure I understood you perfectly, but I doubt Celestia would be the mastermind behind the events. But even if she was, that wouldn't explain anything about the Crest's nature anyway.

(By the way, (Insert Pen Name), thanks for your letter!)

[Toothygrin]

YAY now I can read this on my 3DS thanks for it being here.

[nemryn]

Yeah, I'm not too hot on real-world religions in Equestria. The adventure was good, though!

[Ponibius]

I just finished listening to the audio book of this story, and I have say this was an extremely entertaining, light hearted, witty, over the top pulp action adventure. I laughed time and again at the deliberately cliche nature of the story. The characters were portrayed in a fun way, the story moved at a good pace, and it was an adventure and a half.

[maneteam6]

Fantastic. It was both amusing and engaging. I liked playing "Where's Waldo" with the Indiana Jones references. And Scootaloo...she could practically be an expy of Short Round. Most excellent, most excellent, indeed. Have some staches.

[Themaskedferret]

A ha! I thought it was a reference to the Farley Mowat thing. I've not seen it (since apparently it's horrendous) but my grandfather was a big fan of Mr Mowat's and told me about it.

Also yay for not killing Fancy Pants! The Indy was very well done in this. not too over the top and not too far away.

[Pyrotechnic]

Scootaloo is best Crusader....., but I don't think the other two are 2nd or 3rd. I have added this to my Nook and will read it later. To be completely honest my like of a certain Crusader is only given when I read a story with them behaving either epic or hysterical or epically hysterical. Since this story caught my eye, I will give it a go.

On a slightly unrelated note: I think Scootaloo's fans will explode of happiness and relief if the show ever showed a pony acting parental towards Scootaloo. I wonder the what the route they will go should that ever occur. It would be VERY funny if it turns out she is richer than Diamond Tiara and about 20% funnier if they have Diamond go all out on her bitchiness and then later find out about it. Somehow I don't think that will happen though.....

[Aotrs Commander]

That was delighfully entertaining. Very nicely done; it did very much read like the ponyfied version of it's source material, but with it's own spin to distinguish it. Great work.

[Insert Pen Name]

3657407 You're closer than you know...

[Starlight Nova]

This is on Equestria Daily, right?

[MidnightEclipsed]

I thought this was a sequel to "Daring Dash and Rosetta Sparkle in the Jungle of Peril!"
You lied to me.