• Member Since 26th Sep, 2015
  • offline last seen Oct 10th, 2015

Pornbug


Bug Dicks

Comments ( 17 )

Not bad for your first clopfic. Good work. :twilightsmile:

Nice! Could always use more fics like these. 2 points I should bring up though:

1. I'd recommend investing in an editor to tidy up some of the grammar, there's a few stumbling blocks in there that disrupt the flow a bit.

2. I notice that you didn't really linger on the actual climaxes: with most clopfics(especially ones with cum inflation) the orgasm is the high point of the story, what everything has been leading up to. Describe them a bit more, devote a paragraph or 3 to them and for this story in particular, describe the cumflation in more detail. "Swell", "bloat" and "bulge" are always good words to use. :rainbowkiss:

Nevertheless, have an upvote and a favourite from me. Here's hoping you continue!

Looks good.

6465474 I went ahead and made a few additions to try and give it a bit more oomf. Might as well, though you are right; a good first impact is better than a quick fix after the fact.

Mistakes in description is very bad sign. By this I assume your fic is crap, and I don't want to waste my time to crap. Find editor and check your description and text before putting them out. For shame, for shame.

6467357 Such gentle words, so calm and encouraging to new authors.

Love your mistakes in your comment as well. Good show. :ajsmug:

6467383
I'm angry because even with my... quite imperfect English (it's not my birth-language) I can see your mistakes.

Congrats on the feature!

6467515 It's awesome. Thanks to everyone for getting me there!

6468027 Senpai noticed me. :yay:

6467357 I'll give you the benefit of the doubt and say you're just getting over a break up, so I'm sorry... Your mother and I aren't getting back together.

I have weaknesses for happy Changeling clop. The fact that this was futa, Hyper, and a bunch of other not really weird fetishes makes this really really good. I don't quite believe this is your first clop fic as this is too hot to be first time. I downloaded off site so I can read it again just in case my internet blows up or something. Changelings are awesome! Thanks for writing this

6468661
It's ok, I understand. I hope your mother will not bark and bite you when she'll know it.

Gilda snuck in a little kiss, nipping his muzzle, break hitting his fangs.

Do you mean beak?:rainbowhuh:

There was a pause from the bug. “Well…” Gilda pricked his dick with her talons, making a questioning noise as she ran her tounge across the bugs head, soliciting a shiver from him, “I coooould…”

She's sitting on his head how could she whip around to lick his head and still be on his head?
Hm?:trixieshiftright:

All I can say is... Hawt.

Login or register to comment