Yes! Update!! I already want MOAR!!

Yee-haw, cow-girl! Applejack can really take it huh?

I like Liam's form, so I was happy to see that again, but that isn't going to cause problems with Fluttershy and Applejack is it? I'm hoping we get to see more interaction with Chrysalis, she's so demanding, but I'd like to see her in one of the next chapters. Maybe Lily doesn't end up giving the essences away so easy, and Chrysalis has to try and force them out herself? *shrugs*

Keep writing, it's still very entertaining.

683089 there going to be stuck in her and she's going to need to fuck it out of her e.deviantart.net/emoticons/t/trollface.png

huh, i thought fluttershy would of reacted differntly, but i guess she hasn't found out that liam/lily is sleeping with both her and AJ
ooooo could u imagine the drama?

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OY! Stop giving away my story before it's written!

I'm planning something really good with the essences, Chrysalis, and the Mane 6. Keep tuned.

I was hoping Applejack would have an all natural 70's bush, but I guess not.
I hope Twilight has one, because she doesn't seem like the shaving type to me.

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In my book, Pinkie will have a full bush, RD will be shaved ((For aerodynamics, of course)) And Twi will be trimmed.

Basically this is a story about an OC fucking all of the Mane Six. So it’s important that said OC is an interesting character and not a bland Mary Sue. Well as far as I can tell Lily isn’t a Self-Insert and most people seem to agree with me because otherwise there would be a lot of negative reviews. It’s funny to see the story from her POV and I especially love her biased opinions of the Ponyville residents (especially about Rarity). However, she could need a little bit more personality. We almost know nothing about her expect that she’s kind of a slut and a good schemer. It’s no surprise that most or her thoughts are about sex but it would be nice to see her thinking a bit more about other stuff, too. Also Lilly doesn’t sounds that much like a Changling name but that are just my personal opinion.

And speaking about her plans… While we’ve see that she puts some efforts and thoughts into it (and has to face obstacles like the fact the she has to switch between three identities - one already in some kind of a relation) her usual plan is just making a move on one of the Mane Six and see if it works – which it does. Just take the AJ chapter as example: I think she should’ve done a bit more farm work and trying to get on the good side of Big Mac and (especially) Applebloom before she started jumping AJ. After all AJ is a family person and if she sees how nice Liam is to Applebloom it could’ve warmed her up.

Anyway, it’s a good story especially since it’s your first one. So I’m eagerly awaiting the next chapter.

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YAY PINKIE HAIR-PIE!!!

I have a suggestion: If Pinkie is going to have a full 70's bush, make her 'pinkie hairy-pie' inflate and deflate depending on her mood, like her mane and tail! That would be adorable!!!

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Thanks for the advice! I always appreciate constructive criticism.

Lily's full name is "Liliana" (Used by Chrysalis in the Prologue) which I personally find to be a bit more dark. In addition, I'm attempting to portray her as a sort of mindless, fucking machine, hellbent on carrying out orders. Though if you catch on small details, she's beginning to question Chrysalis' motives, as well as her own place in the whole scheme.

Trust me, though. If my plans for the last chapter go through as I would like, Lily will shock all of Equestria with her actions.

I noticed an error in the poker game. In the hand the Mayor won with the straight flush, the pot should have been split, with at least $290 going to Lilly. The Mayor went all-in after the flop, so she could only win whatever was bet in the first round, plus her all-in, and an amount equal to what she went all-in with from each player. Everything else should have been put in a side-pot, which was won by Lilly.

"She fought an erection"

Never thought I'd see that.... ever...

*Eyebrow raises, remains silent*

5745891 *waggles eyebrows*