Brony-wan-kenobi
Joined 16th Nov, 2012 ·
Offline
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- Brony-wan-kenobi · 41k words · 341 27 · 13k views
- Brony-wan-kenobi · 24k words · 137 27 · 3.9k views
- ForgottenDreams · 4.3k words · 51 17 · 4k views
- Malice In Wonderland · 6.2k words · 47 27 · 4k views
- HIFHSDIOFH · 2.6k words · 19 13 · 904 views
- Killjoy_Writer · 5.8k words · 70 20 · 5.1k views
- Very Sleepy · 4.9k words · 84 29 · 3.9k views
Featured In45
Shipping 💖11,675 stories ·9,745 members
Clopfics11,552 stories ·15,818 members
- Celestia & Luna4,439 stories ·2,705 members
The Fillyfoolers3,948 stories ·3,490 members
Luna Is The Best Pony4,637 stories ·7,267 members
- LunaMac33 stories ·218 members
Slice of Life8,164 stories ·1,463 members
Twilight Sparkle12,293 stories ·4,758 members
Stats
Page generated in 0.173 seconds
Total duration
592 users online
1,069,584 hits today, 2,782,760 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
I read some of the secret island. Do I need to finish it to understand this?
You know, I really don't understand why Celestia would put so little faith in the Guard.
But I'll follow this all the same.
6340047 the last chapter at least. To get a sense of what's happened as a result of things in that story. In fact, I may do a reread just to re-familiarize myself to the 'verse.
Is this story like, a year after the previous one? I just like to know how and when sequels fit in to their predecessors.
Oh good, I was worried there for a second with Rarity. Also doesn't hurt that I'm a fan of RariLane.
6340541
This story takes place some time after Luna, Harvest, and the Apple Family left the island. The events that are occuring right now are described breifly in the chapter 7 Years Later
The only real problem I have with the fic right now is the rather anti-Celestia sentiment it has. Here's hoping the whole trying to have Twilight organize parties was more of a underhanded attempt to subsidize the girls after accidently losing them a bunch of business. Baring that, that it's actually a evil doppelganger trying to bring Twilight to ruin, but the last story kinda disproves that.
Hmm...this is going to be interesting.
I find myself genuinely looking forward to what's going to happen next...although Twilight's desperate apology to Rarity was hilarious.
I can't wait to see more of this story and also maybe a little SunsetxTwilight and FlashxTwilight and maybe both.
6340961
The thing with Celestia isn't done to be anti-Celestia. It's just the way I see her from both the show and the comics. The main thing I've noticed, and mentioned in my last story, is that Celestia seems to believe that ponies can take of problems themseleves. This was brought up in the Spike/Celestia Friends Forever comic as well as the Mirror story line in the main comics. Now, she also mentioned to Spike that there are times when she realizes when somepony is over their head which I like. However, Celestia has shown that she can overestimate what a pony is capable of doing which is what is going on between Celestia and Twilight right now. She believes that Twilight can handle the work (and if you read the Luna micro comic (best of the lot) it shows that Celestia handles a similar load)
As for the whole situation with Luna and the Guard, that stems from Celestia's other fault. Celestia has been ruling Equestria for over a thousand years BY HERSELF! She is used to making all the calls and it still shows. When was the last time when all the princesses were together that she deferred to one of them, let them make the tough calls? And when have the other princesses questioned Celestia choices? As far as I can remember, never. Hell, In the Celestia micro we see that Celestia is willing to use a different sort of underhanded way in order to keep a teacher on her staff who is, frankly speaking, past her prime and needs to retire before her magic hurts a student! So when Luna isn't backing down, isn't going to let Celestia stop her from doing something she feels is important, Celestia does something underhanded and despite all the backlash she can't take it back because that would be like admitting that she was wrong.
Now I'm not saying Celestia is bad or anything. She's made a lot of good calls and there are plenty of good comics and episodes with her. This story line is just about her one biggest mistake
6341447 Would be nice if that came across in the story but so far all anyone has done is talk about how bad she is not to mention her ignoring everyone telling her that Twilight is overworked comes across as neglectful and wilfully ignorant to the point of abuse. You may not be trying to write an anti-celestia story but it's coming across as one. Just mentioning for future chapters.
6342450
Several of the things I talked about were brought up in The Secret Island. Mainly in the last two chapters
Awesome, will be awaiting more.
One thing, though. I would suggest finding an editor or proofreader. There are quite a few spots in this story and Secret Island where you confuzzled the grammar and such.
6340678 I got that, I just want to know how long it's been since they left the island. If you don't have an exact timeframe for these events, that's ok.
6343029 Well it was summer when they were all on the island and its now close to the end of fall, I'd say at least four to five months since they left the island.
6343179 cool, and damn, shit went down fast
6342540
And told in an awfully bad "Celestia sucks, Luna knows better, get out Celestia" way. You can claim it to not be "anti-Celestia" all you want, the events in both stories are evidence to the contrary. It's just portraying Celestia in a bad, out-of-character light for the sake of making Luna look better, in a completely stupid, unbelievable way. It's not convincing in the slightest. The events you ranted down in "Seven Years Later" were so ridiculously hamfisted in and so un-Celestia-like that I can't even believe for one moment you expect your readers to take it seriously.
Celestia does not act the way you write her, plain and simple. Yes, Celestia believes ponies can take care of themselves, but not to the retarded extremes you write her as doing here. Certainly not as far as trying to underhandedly discredit her own sister given everything she went through with Nightmare moon! I know the show treats Celestia like a mentally retarded, brain-dead worm, but give her some measure of dignity for goodness sake. She gets spit on enough in show and comics as it is with plot-induced stupidity, no need to add more crap to the pile with the ridiculous premise presented to us in "Seven Years Later".
6344219
If that's how you feel, fine. You are free to disagree with me. I however stand by what I wrote because I believe she would do something like that based on the evidence I provided. I also believe that Luna would do the things she did because thats the kind of mare she is. I based the situation based on what I have seen of Celestia's Guard in the show and in the comics. I am going to write in a bit of Celestia in the next chapter to give her side of the story, but that's as far as I am going. I am not changing the story line just because a few people think that this is a "Celestia is stupid and Luna is perfect" story.
In the end, this is my story. If you dislike it then you can stop reading it.
When is the next chapter?
6344219
Unfortunately, this is how most of the jaded and lackluster fans see Celestia. The 'useless without Luna' half-wit who keeps trying to sabotage her own sister, or a despicable and selfish tyrant. I blame the NLR for spreading that idea early on in the fandom's inception, and people for some reason having severe issues with characters who are too good for them to reconcile with. So what is meant to be a wise, powerful, motherly and loving leader and role model is instead absolute garbage while Luna gets to prance around like a saint despite almost killing everyone on the damn planet. I also place that blame on recent generations being on a 'darkness is cool' kick, and where better is this juxtaposition seen than in day/night?
They'll be like this forever, sadly. Because whatever led them to see her in such a way (regardless of how they justify it) is tied into how they see her archetype, which usually has its roots in home life. I've been campaigning for her since '11 and I've managed very few converts with tactics ranging from logical reasoning, emotional pleas, basic humane sensibilities, down the road to frustrated ranting after years of dry runs on getting people to open their eyes. They -want- someone to trash on, and it makes them feel better to pile the trash onto the highest-ranked and most noble.
The second half isn't italicised.
I don't know why people thinking Celestia behaving more head-strong is cause to complain about it. As a general rule, if someone can write a character so far removed from what we know, yet do it convincingly, then I think anything is fair game. Celestia comes off as more stubborn/head-strong, having an 'I know what's better' attitude. I think the point is to make Celestia a bit bitchy, because it gives the characters in the story someone to justifiably point the finger at for Twilight's condition.
Celly was offloading her workload onto Twilight because she was busy with something else, which is going overboard and stretching Twilight's capabilities. Does she care? Probably not, but to me, that's kinda the point here. Celestia is playing the part of the blame bunny to an extent.
6346466
The thing is that this rings false with people because Celestia is not like that at all. The author needed a villain and thus twisted Celestia to suit his needs, heedless of her character or wether or not it actually made sense or not. He should've stuck to what he was doing fine in both this and the prequel: write decent clop. The political side-plot that was just dumped on the reader in the last chapter of the prequel in a big exposition dump that has the dubious honour of being one of the worst decently written cases of told-not-shown on the site. I say decently written because it's not not gramatically flawed as far as my non-native english eye can see, but it's still a bad way to tell the story. That would be the case even if it wasn't anti-Celestia, by the way, in case anyone is itching to draw the "you're just a hurt Celestia fan" card.
I was a little confused at Celestias behaviour at first, then I re-read The Secret Island and it all made sense, as this is occuring before the vents of the final chapter of that story.
Enjoying it so far, I look forward to the rest. Maybe some more of the political activities could make for a side story of some kind? The summary in The Secret Island's epilogue was good, but I'm intrigued to hear how events occured 'first hoof' so to speak.
6346577
Isn't that the entire point? Anyone can be a villain. Literally anyone. Why you keep bellyaching about it is beyond me.
But then I got curious and nosied through your favourites list. Well, the first five pages anyway. Wanna guess what I found? Of the five pages, ten stories per page, literally half of what there is, has the Celestia character tag. Five on the first, five on the second, four on the third, then six on each of page four and five.
Then I saw the final line of your comment.
Two parts to that.
By no means is this anti-Celestia. Brony-wan simply used her as the cause for Twilight's condition, plain and simple.
Part two.
Well given your favourites list, it leads me to believe that you are, indeed, a hurt Celestia fan.
Have a good day
6352805
Clearly you have no concept of what in-character means. Further discussion is hence pointless.
6352819
Can I just point out you've read a story where Celestia romances a human, and you're complaining that she's not in-character in this story?
6352838
Can I just point out that pairing her with a human or not has nothing to do with being in-character or not? Quit grasping at straws.
6369834 I'm a 23yo, 200lb, 6ft dude
6370069 Well when you said "ladies" I thought I'd clarify that much for you
Ko so when's the next chapter coming.
6376180
As soon as I finish writing it. I already got the 1st sex scene in the chapter finished
You forgot to close the italics.
6440173 fixed thanks
6440173 Hopefully I explained Celestia's side of the story
from what? Zebras? Monkeys? Trees? Incomplete sentence is incomplete.
6440289 fixed
I feel that I need to ask This:
WHERE IS SPIKE? AND WHAT HAPPENED TO HIM AFTER HE SAW THAT RARITY AND THUNDERLANE ARE NOW A COUPLE?
6440442
Ah, it was said in the first chapter that he left to go to fillydelphia to help out mina the dragon.
Okay, I admit I understand Celestia's logic here. And it is logical.
However, she's still wrong. Putting all your faith for the safety of your kingdom on a magic you don't fully understand goes well beyond foolhardy. I agree that she couldn't publicly endorse increasing the army...but that's no reason she couldn't allow the development of local militia. Specially train the top guardsmen to be teachers of military strategy, then dispatch them to the various cities and towns throughout Equestria to teach the locals to defend their own homes in case of emergency and it takes too long for Rainbow Power to get there.
...or is that the compromise Twilight would have come up with if she'd been invited to the discussion?
6440507
Ok. Now I remember reading that in the first CHAPTER. Sorry. And that answer the first question.
But the 1000000 bits question is. What did he do or what happened to HIM when he recieve the "bad news" for HIM that Rarity is now Dating THUNDERLANE and that they are now a COUPLE?
Or did Spike go to Fillydelphia to try to FORGET about Rarity?
6440661 That will be explained when his story comes up.
6440588
Yes, if Twilight, Cadence, or Shining Armor had been there there would have been a compromise. However, neither Luna nor Celestia were willing to bend their views and because of what would happen with the diamond dogs Luna ended up getting her way
6440827
I was asking if the compromise I came up with is the one Twilight, Cadence, or Shining would have suggested.
6440845 most likely
I'm really excited in a positive way! For several reasons, in fact!
a) I like Flash and Twilight together. It's cute.
b) Flash, Sunset, Twilight harem? Yes please! Even better!
c) Rarity and Thunderlane? Needs more love, this pairing!
d) The nobles are not the scum of the earth and a cheap, lazy way to introduce conflict due to a rampant stupidity and completely disdain and disregard for the princesses that makes absolutely no sense in the context of the show! Hurray!
e) Celestia has a reason for acting as she did? Double Hurray!
Saying you're not worth it is unacceptable. I say Twilight should have both Flash Sentry and Sunset Shimmer in her life.
6440588 I also remember, either from chapter 1 of this or the epilogue from the previous story, the Royal Guard and Army were severely lacking in many departments, mostly in fitness.
Heh, fitness. For them, more like 'fitn' this whole hayburger in my mouth!'
So will we get an answer to who is exactly in Twilights herd? I can see Sunset Shimmer and the human Flash but the question is why would he choose to stay here instead of going between world occasionally? Eagerly awaiting the next chapter!
6441063 KO good story hope the next chapter comes soon.
Flash's line is missing. And a you is missing from between "are" and "hitting".