HI! I'm going to tell you a little story about a 13-year old filly who goes to Hoovington Middle School and gets caught up in the craziest drama imaginable, from friends getting into trouble with guys, to late homework assignments, and everything in between. And all the while having a HUGE crush on a colt in her grade, named Coffee Cream. Yes, girls can be friend-zoned too! Turns out he's not what I thought he was. Or I guess he kind of is. Anyway my name is Kary Kuddlez, but my friends call me Kay. And this story is all about me. Other ponies probably don't realize how interesting my life really is. So I'm finally going to reveal it all. I guess that kinda makes it an autobiography.
Chapters (1)
I like it so far. A few comments though:
There are some elements of the story which seem too Earth, and not Equestria enough, if you see what I mean. Some of the names, like Hannah, Katlyn, and Mrs Davis don't seem very pony-like. (Though in the show, we've only seen certain parts of Equestria, and it's possible that other naming conventions exist in places like Hoovington.) But other names like Mrs Notes, Mrs Globe, and Coffee Cream are great, so it's clear you, as an author, are capable of coming up with good names for characters — you just don't seem to have applied the same principle to all your characters.
It's also not clear why they're learning Spanish — is Spain a thing in Equestria? Maybe they could be learning Saddle Arabian? In general, it would be nice if you mentioned some pony-specific classes that you wouldn't get on Earth. Maybe there's a period when the unicorns go off to study magic, the pegasi learn advanced flight manoeuvres, and the earth ponies study agriculture?
Anyway, overall I like it, and I'll probably keep reading.
6028062 Thx for the advice, I have made the changes and I see what you mean. iv'e changed some names, added some stuff, so if you want to reread it you can, but you don't have to. Anyway about the Spanish thing, I can't believe I didn't see that. Thanks for pointing that out as well, it does seem pretty stupid thinking about it now. But I changed that too. I was think about changing it to Manish, you know for Mane, but...well I guess you can see what's wrong with that. Anyway, thanks for making the reading experience better for everyone else who reads it now!
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6028151 No problem.
One other thing: an epilogue is a final chapter. The word for a introductory chapter is "prologue".
6028174 Wow, I feel even stupider now. But thx for saving me from even further embarrasment. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME!