- Member Since 28th Jun, 2014
- offline last seen April 3rd
Brony kaiju soldier
A 27 year old Brony with Asperger's syndrome who enjoys ponies, kaiju, video games, history, animals and a few other things.
Brony kaiju soldier
Joined 28th Jun, 2014 ·
Offline
Sequels1
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Brony kaiju soldier · 5.8k words · 53 11 · 2.1k views
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I know who is the next pony that Barb is going to have fun with.
6021530 Perhaps.
6021905 It's Rainbow Blitz isn't it?
6021911
6021921 That is.... AWSOME!!!!! Those are the immortal words of Rainbow Dash and Kaz from Mighty Med.
Sparity probabilities were dead anyways.
6021968 Glad ya think so.
6022282 Eeyup.
6022503 And I know that if Kaz from Mighty Med met Rainbow Dash, they would get along perfectly.
6022518 Eeyup.
6022525 Hmm-hm
6022560 Mmhmm.
6022569 Yeah, thanks and you are Godzilla fan? AWESOME!
Wow...not to put too fine a point on this but I am...rock hard right now. You did an amazing job with this story and you made it very un-incesty wheich is soemthing I can appreicate.
6024574 Thanks.
6022578 Eeyup.
Found this on my lunch break... dangit, why I gotta wait til after work?!
6025108 The build up.
Barb is hotness, but I always have such a hard time imagining Big Mac as anything but a stallion.
Hot story, man. The threesome was hot.
6025641 Thanks.
6025639 R63 Big Mac is cool.
6025237 Yessss Im off, time for porrrrn
and then video games
6026507 Aight then.
This fic is pretty good. I personally never liked genderbent fics but I found this ons delivering with the plot being good so pionts to you for doing good on that. The sex I would say while not intense is well written and interesting.I would to give this a 9.6/10
6034898 I thank you for your opinion and the score.
6034923 no prob thanks for writing this.
6035036 Anytime.
On behalf of The Anti-Plagiarism Investigation Reports, I am sorry to inform you that an author over on Fanfiction.net appears to have ripped this fic off, as well as several others, and is claiming it as his own. We have created a file on this, which includes a form to be sent in to the Fanfiction.net admins to request the plagiarized fic be taken down.
https://www.fanfiction.net/topic/124913/134496327/1/Report-FFNID-6103139-HoTwi-My-Little-Pony-active-NSFW#134524744
6051407 Thanks for letting me know.
This was not and really good.
Just three things that could be a bit better for future fics.
1.) Macareina and applejack seemed to be more of the focused then Barb was at points.
2.) And the oral sex seemed to have more detail then the other sex.
3.) And after the oral sex, the intercourse each time was on paragraph and was short and giving a time of 5 mins at one point made it really short and kinda pointless.
Other then those things this was great!
6053859 I'll keep that in mind for the future, thank you.
NICE
6076617 Thanks.
Before I read, what is "ass expansion"?
6077164 It's making your ass bigger through magic or other methods.
6077915 10/10
6079867 Glad you liked it.
Took me a while to realize that this was Rule 63. And there's nothing wrong with Rule 63. In fact, it's one of my faves. I'll dive in and give you my opinions!
Rule of thumb, try not to use the same word twice in the same sentence. Try to spice it up using synonyms.
I notice you're making the accents sound how they're spoken. Personally, I like to just write them as they are written.
There's too many commas here. In cases like these, try to spread it apart.
Off to the side, Macareina could be seen walking up. She started to slowly untie the string holding her thin top, but she was getting distracted and aroused from watching the purple dragoness working her voluptuous hips on Applejack.
Stuff like that.
Beautiful wincest.
Cock head? Sounds like a rooster's head.
3lewd5me
Too much description on the figure, try to also write on what he's doing. Maybe sitting on the cloud? Hiding away? One simple paragraph is not enough. Well, not my part.
You rascal.
Also, there's a lot of space below that. A reason for that?
11/10 wood bang
6104331 Thanks for the input. I'm glad you enjoyed it. I'm still not where I want to be for writing, but I'm getting there. As for the space, I'll fix it.
I think you should've added something for when Dusk would be furious with Elusive for what he said to Barb. Better yet, have the other guys join in on this and beat Elusive up and make him apologize to Barb when she didn't even mean to burn his suit.
8714660
You're gonna see the repercussions of Elusive's actions in the future.
8714720
Hope So
8714723
It's gonna be after the Blitzening.
8716000
And when are you going to finish that story?
8716046
Soon.