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The diaries kept by the citizens of Ponyville tell a dark tale, a tale of mistrust and of murder, of the time when a mysterious mare was discovered near the Everfree Forest with no memory of who she was or where she came from... and proceeded to bring chaos to the once peaceful town.
Crossover with 'Town of Salem', playing the game or having any prior knowledge of it is not require to read and understand this story.
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FINALLY!!!
This story has received a very disappointing number of views, can anyone provide some sage advice as to how I can change that?
It's a tough call on that, dood. Like I enjoyed it, but most people will only look at this if they've heard of 'Town of Salem'.
The only thing that turned me off a bit was that everyone knows who is what role with the exception to the Serial Killer, part of the charm of Town of Salem was not knowing who you can trust, dood. So knowing right off the bat that Twilight is the amnesiac, Applejack is the Godfather, and Rainbow Dash is the Sheriff. In any normal game, the first night would have Mayor Mare dead along with either Rainbow Dash or Thunderlane/Scootaloo, with Applejack getting lynched the the second day.
But then again, it would be weird that a small town would not know who is who so you gotta pick your poison I suppose, dood. Still, a neat read and am curious as to what side Twilight chooses.
5973188 Nothing besides simply believing that the story will be received in a great way when writing it. I know it doesn't make much sense, but when I write, it seems that it mostly depends on my personal mood and how much of myself I pour into the story. It is the only way I can explain it. Know yourself and your readers when you write. Know that some only enjoy certain elements and play those elements, don't try to imitate others, write by your own style and simply do it.
5973188 Could be the format. Diary form stuff might simply not be as interesting for people as something more hands-on. (Though, I personally think it can work.)
The plot is also one that tries to mirror a game, which could have something to do with it. People who have played mafia/warewolf/etc know what it's about. A story like this is like the game, but without the playing part, ergo it's a lesser experience by default. And since people know the format/rules of the game, the plot becomes terribly predictable.
Making a Danganronpa inspired fic like your previous one was does not quite host the same type of problem. Firstly since the game already was leaning heavily on the visual novel side. But also because you expanded on it with a quite unique setting. In contrast, this outing is more "true" to the source material, and sadly, I don't think that is for the better. I enjoy it though.
Also, getting featured on the frontpage drags in views. Which, IIRC, happened with your last two fics. :P
As much as I dislike knowing everything at the start, I am a fan of this ending, dood.
Game Mechanics a side anyways, this was still a good story all in all, dood.
But Rarity...
When the town goes to sleep
You can hear the sound of something devious,
Of something quite mysterious,
Lurking in the dark....
So, most of these are pretty obvious parallels to Town of Salem, but some are less so.
Like Fluttershy, is she the Doctor, or the Serial Killer?
Rarity is she the Witch, the Arsonist, or perhaps a second Escort (not in title but in ability).
And how exactly are you going to handle Retributionist...
Hey, I saw you were asking what might make people avoid this fic. You should probably make it clear that no knowledge of Town of Salem is necessary to understand this story. Sometimes, people see crossovers and think "well, if I don't know both halves of the crossover, I'll probably just be really confused."
I thought this was nice, by the way. Anyone who came here looking for a mystery would be disappointed, but as a narrative it is fairly compelling. My only complaint is that there is not a "side" that could be declared the winner. But that's the Town of Salem player in me talking more than the reader, so you should probably ignore that critique.
6139772 I will amend the description, and yes I know there wasn't any real mystery, but then I wanted to go for something different this time. As in I wanted to examine the different thoughts and feelings of the various parties while the mystery (in their perspectives, not the readers) unfolded, as opposed to Bullet Point/Storm which was a mystery but followed only one character for the most part. But I'm glad you liked it and thank you for reading.
6139790
No, that's what I mean though. I don't think this story is a mystery. I didn't feel like it was ever meant to be a mystery. This story is about the narrative, not any sense of suspense. So I feel like any critique of it as a mystery is the equivalent of critiquing Pride and Prejudice for not having many action sequences.
I must say, this is a very good fic, makes me wish there was more Town Of Salem crossovers here. However the ending isn't that hard to figure out, in fact I called it right after the first chapter, still it's a good read.
Nothing bad happens in this town.
Oh rarity, if only you knew.
Also how do you make those letters look like that?
6567255
I wonder who the killer is?
Killer: you will know someday.
What the fuck?
So, sweetie belle is a spirit medium? At first I didn't what a medium is when it was mention in family guy.
Wow... I'm clearly impressed... Many people may not be commenting but that doesn't mean that this isn't beautiful! It's just that not everyone knows about Town of Salem so they won't know what this is! But remember that you will always have a fan in me!
I bet twis a witch
Huh, an anmesiac, can't wait to see what that goes to
Dang veterans, always ruining a mafia's good day.
NOTHING BAD EVER HAPPENS IN THIS TOWN!
6567362
I bet it's pinkie
Well, pinkie as a jester makes more sense now.
Hey man, I would have asked you permission before making this, but I figured you might never log in to your account and see it.
I hope you enjoy it and feel good that your Story finally got the recognition it deserved. It's been on my Bucket list to make an audiobook of and finally I recently got inspired to do it by also making it the first audiobook that I'm including a video presentation with.
The video of Day 0 is up, But Day 1 I'm saving until December 13 to put up.
https://youtu.be/j1573mvFCF0
Awww, I'm a little disappointed that new characters just keep getting added to be the SKs victims, I hope to see some cuts start to be made to the mane cast as they are eliminated, just like what makes ToS fun as it eventually comes down to the final few.
Particularly since I've been making a video for this lol, I've been needing to keep updating Rainbow Dash's notes with more characters.
Aha, cool bit with Cheerilee, looks like there are going to be many ways that the roster is going to get thinned down really soon :).
Man some intense stuff is gonna need to happen soon, for this roster to start coming down in number.
Full Audio Video version in progress!
Full Audio Video version in progress!
Oh heck yeah, this chapter was epic and the emotion portrayed in the writing help me a lot with expressing it while recording it out loud :). I look forward to when I get this chapter made.
It was really cool how the role of Jester was a plot device to address mental health issues, it gave me genuine feels.
and me!
Although when it comes to making a video for this, it is a bit annoying that another new character has shown up as a victim for the SK and another has shown up to suddenly be the librarian. Although I suppose that was foreshadowed slightly in the first chapter.
I hope that whoever the SK is, is going to make sense. I'd be disappointed if it turns out to just be Cabelleron or Trixie all along. Who I had assumed were just throw away background cast. Or even Flitter, who didn't seem to even be in the cast until now.
Of course Pinkie was Jester. I'm the fool for not realizing it earlier.