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The Writers' Group56,416 stories ·9,293 members

Born to be friends

We all know what happened when Twilight first came to Ponyville. But what happened before that? And how did our lovely mares become friends in the first place?

Translated to English by Dawnflash.

Chapters (4)

The Apple, the Flower and the Diamond · 20th Apr 2015 · 3,180 words
3,180
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Farewell and the Butterfly · 20th Apr 2015 · 4,518 words
4,518
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Three colorful balloons · 20th Apr 2015 · 4,538 words
4,538
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A Dash of hope · 20th Apr 2015 · 4,173 words
4,173
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SWEETOLEBOB18

SWEETOLEBOB18 #1 · Apr 20th, 2015 · · · A Dash of hope ·

A good story. Here & there you have got some odd word choices, but not too bad. (Spell checker tells you if the word is spelled right, it doesn't tell you it is the wrong word). The biggest problem is that after Rarity & Cheerilee get a dog for Apple Jack, there are several paragraphs that just keep repeating the same bits over & over. It's annoying.

The only real problem I have is Apple Jack's friendships with Rarity. Ponyville is a small town. It looks like they have a "one room school house". This means several classes would be in the same room with the same teacher. Thus, Apple Jack would know both Rarity and Cheerilee. However, season 1 episode 8 Look Before You Sleep strongly implies that Rarity and Apple Jack were NOT friends before that time.