Not really big on fanfic writing, but when I'm in the mood I'll jot something down from time to time. I'd much rather frequent sites like YouTube, DeviantArt, and Facebook
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Read the sequel here! A SOMBRA END
Starlight Glimmer ran into the tunnels of the snowy mountains after narrowly evading capture at the hooves of the ponies she had tried to teach her ideals of true friendship and harmony to before they turned against her.
It is in these tunnels she ran into. It is these tunnels that she will remain. Forever.
Done as a personal challenge to write a quick Season 5-based fanfic in half an hour. I hope I did good.
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5830205 I try my best. If the viewer leaves at least with a smile, it's a job well done for me. :)
I like the story. Very beautiful. And dark.
I wonder, where'd you get the language?
Interesting. The one thing that kept throwing me off though, was the language. What on Earth was that?
Pretty good story, either way.
5830245 Once upon a time, I wanted to be a games designer. I even attended university in order to learn stuff about gaming, but instead I ended up being put on a regular IT course, and I only got to do two out of the three years I was supposed to do at the university. Apparently, some new students with more money were coming to attend, so room needed to be made, and I got 'graduated' early just so the university could get the new lot in.
Anyways, out of university, I still wanted to be a game designer for a while, so I began working on an idea for an awesome fighting that I called 'Unique Fighters'. I didn't know any game programming stuff, but I was pretty decent at drawing, so I figured if I drew up my ideas and sent them in to a company, maybe they might make something of it.
So I got to drawing some characters. One of the character of my game was a pretty badass demon I named Nothing. (He had quotes like, 'You cannot defeat me, for I am Nothing', and stuff). Well, the language in this story is from his character.
I'm surprised you didn't think it was that dragon language from Skyrim. XD Funny thing is, Skyrim came out the year AFTER I was working on my idea. I've given it up now, but it's not entirely forgotten. I redesigned the main character of my game idea from his dragon form into a pony form which I now use as my avatar and official image, Unique the Anthro-Pegasus.
Sorry for boring you with this long unnecessary back story, but when my fingers get typing, it's sometimes hard to keep a comment short. Some people say I type more words than I talk them. XD
5830298 Haha! I actually thought it WAS from Skyrim until the dragon language translator didn't work, so I figured it might be from another game. Turns out you created it yourself!
Well then, just keep on making more masterpieces with your characters and you might be a real awesome writer!
5830292 Read the comment above yours. But I'll just give you the answer here so you don't have to read the explanation.
The language was taken from a demonic fighting game character I created a few years ago when I wanted to be involved in game designing. The language was spoken by my game's antagonist.
5830308 Ha ha ha! Maybe I should ask Bethesda Studios for royalty fees for basing their dragon language on mine! XD Get me Phoneix Wright now!
Huh? What do you mean he's not real? Ah, damn it...
Ah, but you are too kind. I'm quite happy to settle for being the best I can be.
This was a BAD ASS story and honestly... I can see this being the start of a big journey.... the likes of which could challenge the Mane 6 like no one else.
5832757 Actually, I was looking back on this, and...
I've figured that if I can't think of a way to continue the writing of my 'The Dash and the Furry-ous' story, I MIGHT just bring back the 'Truth' creature from this story and maybe throw another character into his cave.
So the question that I ask is this.
What do you, and anyone else reading this comment, if any, think the next character should be to enter his cave? Keep in mind the character you send in, very much likely won't be coming back out, so don't suggest your favorite characters if you don't like to see them getting talked down and murdered.
5832846 Oh that's easy. Tirek and/or Discord. By Discord I mean Pre-Keep Calm and Flutter On Discord.
5832850 No. You send in Discord in all his carnations. You don't get to keep Discord from his good episodes.
As for Tirek, he's in Tartarus, and he's not getting out anytime soon. But maybe the 'Truth' will visit him. I've only just made him up for this story, and already I will tell you that he isn't restricted to his mountain lair. He just prefers being there unless there's a strong enough reason for him to venture away from it.
But with Tirek in a cage in pony Hell, I guess Tirek won't be getting a visit from my 'Truth' creature. Lucky him.
Any other characters you can suggest?
5832875 In that case Discord in all forms.
5830298
I did think it was Thu'um from Skyrim, so I ran it through the Dragon to English translator on Thu'um.org, but it was just broken English that didn't really make sense.
5833124 Thu'um! That was the name of the dragon tongue! Thank you good sir! I was trying to remember what it was called!
I could have turned on my Xbox and found out that way, but...well, I was too stupid to think of doing that. XD
Interesting... I kinda wonder who was that though and also what made you decide to use thu'um.
5835115 XD It's not Thu'um. It's actually based on my own language I created for a demonic character for a fighting game idea I had a few years ago when I was aspiring to be a game designer. Skyrim came out the year AFTER I decided to cease working on my project since I realized that just drawings alone wouldn't be enough to get attention from a games company.
In fact, I used to joke about whether Thu'um was based on MY game's would-be antagonist. XD
But still, I love Skyrim so much. I love dragons and anything to do with them, so I actually appreciate you comparing the 'Truth's' dialect with that game.
5835115 Also, I MIGHT bring this 'Truth' character back if people commenting here are interested in a sort of sequel but with a different character. I kinda enjoyed beating Starlight Glimmer down here. If another character deserves a beating, I might do it to sate my darker side...
5834518
. But more importantly, since your character's "language" did show up as broken english in the Thu'um translator, do you think that means the language was based off of yours, or possibly a direct copy?
We all have our moments
5837241 I was joking before, but maybe it's a small possibility...I never really thought of it properly before.
5837302
Well, if you don't see it as an issue, I guess it's not worth fretting over. On another note, I would like to see a sequel of this; after all "the truth hurts" especially when it exposes the chinks in others armor of beliefs and convictions, especially those who as so sure that they are doing the "right thing".
5837498 Well...we'll see what comes.
5835115 The correct name for the language is Dovazhul and thu'um just means shout.
Hi there. I hope you don't mind, but I liked this fic so much I've converted it into a dramatic reading on YouTube.
5912476 (stares at you with mouth wide open, pupils the size of pin pricks, amazed and speechless that the one and only Obabscribbler is not only commenting on his story, but even went as far as to do a reading of it)
I might be a little slow but did her neck brake at the end? I don't fully understand what happened at the end.
But it was certainly fun to read~
5912769 I leave it to your imagination what happened. But she's definitely dead at this point.
Also, after learning that Obabscribbler did a reading of this, I'm thinking of maybe throwing another villain into the mountain caves with this demon, so keep an eye out for that.
And thank you so much for reading and viewing this story. Your kindness is hugely appreciated and I am honored indeed. (bows politely)
5912788 this is so well-written!
O great Writer UniqueSKD, please, I ask that I may write a spin-off tale in this universe.
Please, I beg you, I'll pm you the link to the story.
5913156 First of all, our father loved you more than me. We are brothers, Robin of Loxley!
You may not understand the reference, but I'll never get another chance to make that joke. XD
Secondly, you have my absolute permission to do so. I wasn't going to do one myself but I've decided that if this was decent enough that the talented Obabscribbler would do a reading of it, then I could try writing a sequel too. Of course your take on the sequel would be different to mine, so it wouldn't matter who wrote it first or whatnot.
And thirdly, I'm not a great writer. I often struggle to write stories. Those stories of mine that have a lot of views, were mostly down to luck. But I don't aspire to be a great writer, my friend. Just the best that I can be, and that's really when I'm in the mood to write. But I appreciate the kind compliment regardless. :)
Let me have the first read of the story when you're done writing it, okay?
5913702 of course you'll get the first read my brother! (no i dont get that refrence)
I'll pm you the stuff you'll need to read it before it's posted, also, one thing i find useful for writing is to describe the area all little as possible.
it leaves the rest of the area to the readers mind. when you read it, dont bash on my technique, there's method to my madness.
5914012 If a method works for you, why would I ever bash it?
5914332 er, how long have you been on the internet?
Case Closed.
I'm curious to know what language the entity was speaking, and what he was saying. I tried entering it in google translate, but nothing came up.
5915668 It was a made-up language I invented some few years ago. I wanted to be involved in the game development industry, and I even attended University to study IT courses. I was given only ONE lesson on game design and that was it. Also, the school only kept me on for two years instead of the full three they promised me, because some richer kids were coming along and they decided to 'graduate' me early to get them in. I still got an official diploma, so I'm not too peeved about it all. I still got evidence of a qualification.
Anyways, I decided that instead of programming games, I'd instead draw an idea for one. The idea I had was a fighting game I code-named 'Unique Champions'. One of the characters for that game was a demon named Nothing, and he would be the final boss of the game's intended story mode (he'd be a nasty piece of work, taunting the player at the end of his heavy combo's, saying things like 'You cannot defeat me, for I am Nothing' and the like).
The language that the Demon speaks in this story is the same as what the character from my video game idea spoke.
Understandably, many people think that the language is or is based on the dragon language (Thu'um, I think it's called?) from Skyrim, but Skyrim actually came out the year after I began my little project, so I couldn't have known about it.
Sadly, I gave up on my video game idea, but it didn't entirely go to waste. The main character of my game, an anthropomorphic dragon named Dre'ko, was taken and redesigned into what is now my anthro-pony avatar, who is called Unique, as a homage to an idea that never will be. And I took the name of my project and made it into my channel name 'UniqueSKD'.
So there you go. A little bit of backstory behind the strange language you've been googling, and a little bit about myself as well. If there is anything else you'd like to know, do not be afraid to ask away. I enjoy a bit of social conversation. :)
5916104 That answers a number of questions that I didn't even know I had. But the most important question remains unaddressed. What was he saying?
5919346 Well, 'Kee kee kee ku ku ku hur hur hur' is how the Demon laughs. As for everything else...
Well, how about this - I'm working on a sequel to this story in a while. I'm having the remains of King Sombra stumble upon the Demon's cave, and since you've addressed the fact you don't know what the Demon is saying, how about in the sequel I translate the Demon's dialect so you can see what he is saying?
5919708 That'd be cool, though I would recommend putting the translations in the author's note at the end of the fic, so as not to interrupt the flow of the story.
looks like this creature has found the perfect place for one such as itself in Equestria. Not being greedy and finding the perfect victims, ones no pony will try to find, dismissing them as not being worth the time. In a world like Equestria it's about harmony, and dark fates await dark souls.
love it just love it (claping)
Hey, I wrote a review for this story and its sequel! It can be found here.
Overall, what you were going for was pretty neat, but it suffers from the lack of editing.
5975723 I like to keep my stuff as it is. Why should I need to rely on editors to make my stories better? I'm not a great superb writer, but no way am I going to be dependent on better people to make my stories look and sound good. If I fail, I'm failing alone, or else I'm taking this entire site down to Hell with me! AH HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!
By the way, this will be a series. There's a third installment coming and it's going to feature Trixie. Keep an eye out for that if you care at all. :)
What language was that being spoken by the creepy voice and who WAS that mysterious being anyway?
5983801 It is a language that existed long before the time of Equestria.
The creature, as he says in the story, has been called many things, but his real identity is simply the Demon.
5983902
Yet does the language have a real world counter part?
5984428 Yes, in a way.
It's based on a language I made up for a video game I once tried to make. It was a fighting video game and...oh god I can't explain it all over again. XD
Scroll down through the comment, you'll find my explanation behind the Demon's language somewhere there. XD
I found this story by way of Scribbler's reading, I thought it was fantastic!
Keep up the good work!
6111408 That's weird. I found Obabscribbler through my own story! XD Glad you enjoyed it, mate. I do animations on YouTube as well if you'd like to give those a look whenever. I'm a novice animator but my recent stuff has gotten a bit better considering I don't use Flash like most people do. All hand-drawn effort, baby! I don't need Flash to correct my shapes and make half the animation for me. Old School Hard Work! Shamone!
Sorry, I got a bit carried away there. I do that sometimes. Anyways, thanks for reading and may you have a pleasant day or evening, wherever in this world you may be. (bows politely)
I can tell from the cover art this must involve SCP-087-1.
Gonna take a read.
Edit: That WAS SCP-087-1, wasn't it? If so, then damn. No wonder people never exit The Stairwell.
They can't face the Truth.
6114793 Nothing to do with SCP. In fact I never even thought or considered any resemblance to any of the 2000 SCP's until you've just mentioned them.
6114811 He should be SCP-087-1. He fits the role, and what you've written would be an incredible piece of info about it.
The Stairwell would essentially be another branch of Truth's domain, where a small portion of its power manifests.
6114823 That...is actually pretty interesting when I think about it. You should write that into a story right now!