[First Person] [Alternating Perspectives][Equisverse Era 1]
Twinkleshine has a secret, one which defines her very existence. Colgate knows her secret and it has her head over hooves in love with the oblivious mare. Fed up with Shine's failure to notice Cole, their mutual friends Lyra, Bon-bon, Vinyl, and Octavia hatch a scheme to get Shine to fall for Cole. However, they choose to hatch their little plot next week at Princess Cadence's wedding, where Twinkleshine's secret catches up with her. Can friendship survive a dark secret kept for longer than the friendship has lasted? Can the friends emerge from a Canterlot Wedding unscathed?
This story has been completed before any of it was uploaded for your enjoyment.
Chapters (14)
I understand you wanting to get complete works out but the sheer size of this fic even though not too big discourages me from reading it.
5567657 Really? It only barely counts a novel by the Science Fiction and Fantasy Writers of America organization and only the information needed to set up the series is there, It's not padded out. Everything is ether relevant to the story or foreshadowing.
Or do you mean the chapter sizes are too large?
5567695 No I mean you could have the chapters uploaded daily instead of all at once.
5567717 Why? It weakens the quality of the story if I write it one chapter at a time. It seems fairly pointless to have all of it done but publish only a single chapter a day/week/ whatever when I can simply put it all out here at once, you can read however much you like of it, favorite it, and finish later. Or read it all in one go.
It's just how I do things. If it docent suit you, you don't have to read it. You do you, I'll do me.
5567657 Bak bak bak ! You chicken!
5567751 No need to taunt her. I assume she simply didn't grow up reading books.
5567754 Oh its a she? I am glad I chose my words well then. Oh I taunt in good fun though. Trust me I just trying to get her to read your story but shhhhhh!
5567733 The thing is if i start now and stop midway it may take up to a month before i remember to read this again. However you make the decisions. And its not stupid at all.
5567751 "her". Is Dennis a female name to you?
As for you meep you think its fine insulting me like that? "I didnt grow reading books"? You know what maybe you are right that i chicken out on reading this. But then again I chicken out on fics that are 1 million words big. Regardless that doesn't grant you the right to insult me.
5567771 I have no clue. I just assume female until proven otherwise. Why? Guys don't realy care much if you get their sex wrong, but girls? Oh dear Celestia *shudders*.
As for my story, don't worry your head over it. Just enjoy it yourself. I wrote this because I wanted to, I shared it for people who like stories. If someone docent want to read it. No biggie. Bit of a dick move to comment on it that they are not going to read it, but meh.
5567778 I'm sorry that insulted you. I did not intend it to be insulting.
5567778 Ah so your gonna be like that then? Ok that's fine have a good fucking day sir.
5567798
5567790 No I simply expected that two users that visited my profile would likely know If I am male or female. I am sorry for derailing the comments on this fic. To clarify and end this argument I don't appreciate taunting.
I will read this... eventually. Maybe I'll add it to my read later list. But be warned. Fics there some of them are for over a year.
5567811 Don't care I told you good day sir no point in replying back.
How come no other changeling uses this?
Is this a pun of a real life scientist I don't know of?
What do you mean by that?
Kaiju moment? How does Meep know what a Kaiju is? Bet this is teasing from you right?
I see what you did there.
What kind of exclamation is wot wot? Like yay or something? Sorry I don't understand. Also... you made them play Dungeons and Dragons. I love you. I love D&D.
Is the comment war over? Is it safe to come out?
If so I have to say you took a very interesting concept for this one. I have not read much, but I like what I have read so far and I will read more soon.
Awesome. XD
Wow, what an awesome start! It's really difficult to pull off an OC as well as you've done in this opening chapter. I'm liking this. :)
5568029 Thanks! And it appears the flame war has subsided.
5569258 Thank you. That is perhaps the highest praise I could be given. I put a lot of work into Meep expressly for the reason of showing people that an OC can be a great character.
I just finished reading the whole thing over night (what is sleep?) and I must say I truely enjoyed it! I love how you give different views from different ponies (and changeling) about the Canterlot wedding. I was actually hoping for an ending on how it was all resolved. Like did people hate Meep after they found out who she was and all that. Overall I give you a 10/10 <3
5570121 Thanks for the praise! Made my day.
As for the ending... if I tied that up in a nice little package what would I do for the sequel? This is the starting point of a series my friend :D
May I ask what your favorite part was?
5567695
Unrelated;
Could you please write a fic of the cmc's next adventure?
This has been one of the nicer changeling fictions i have read during my time here, thank you.
P.s.
I'm not sure if you have realized, but there are numerous spelling errors throughout this work, none are major enough to make it unreadable, but they do cause a jump in the otherwise smooth construction.
Many thanks
~~Flutter-Shy~~
5570577 There are bound to be a few errors, I don't ave an editor. Future works will be better as I shake the rust off my writing skills.
As for the CMC, a little bird tells me a short story is underway to fill the gap between this story and it's sequel.
5570611
Thank you for the information, I'm keen for the release!
5570641 2 weeks tops for the short, sequel when it's good and finished :D
I realise that this is probably true if someone looks hard enough but we aren't explained how that train of thought connected and she made that conclusion. I mean all we are told is she saw her as a changeling, she went to look for her parents and didn't find them. Imho this is not enough to account for irrefutable evidence.
Also you said that food essentially doesn't affect changelings right? Do they have a digestive system? If not how the hell did Twinkleshine/Meep get drunk?
You mean to tell me that there's basically two figures of godlike power that dictate how the changelings behave rendering them black or white like Drow with Lloth and Elves with Sylvannus or whatever his name was? Is there even a hope for the blue-eyed ones?
No it's not... it's an obsession and I have experienced it first hand for at least three whole years during 15-18. Trust me it's unhealthy.
And then you learn that like Edward Meep has been a hundred year old virgin and you face drops down in terror. Sorry... couldn't resist. But seriously Edward from Twilight is like that.
Does that mean that when a changeling loses focus or gets excited it also loses its' form?
5571582 I seem to have missed your comments! Hold on...
Comment One
Question one: They do! In Meep's time it was an art forbidden to all but the Queen and select nobility. Today any changeling of great value to the hive is taught the trick.
This is a first person story, the narrator is a character within the story. Meep is not all knowing, she only knows what she herself knows. Therefore when she narrates a chapter, you only know what she chooses to tell you.
Question two: Yes, it's a joke on the name of the scientist Wernher Magnus Maximilian, Freiherr von Braun, better known as Wernher von Braun. A Nazi scientist who after WWII worked for the united states and holds the title of "the Father of Rocket Science" and is the man who invented the turbo-pumps which allow for liquid fueled rockets.
All of Meep's lives names are jokes about real world scientists in the field of Astrophysics. Ether I use a title they had, directly translate the name into english to make a pony name, or make a pun.
Question Three: A G-Type main sequence star is the category of a particular type of star. In this case one like the star Sol, our sun. Sorry for the pun of mane.
Question Four: Did you conciser that perhaps Kaiju exist ton Equis? Because technically they do. They Hydra you see in on episode would certainly count, as would dragons. Sure they are not as deadly as Godzilla, but they are giant monsters with special powers. As for the word it;self, if there is a "Saddle Arabia", and a "Germaney" there is probably also a terrible horse pun of Japan nation somewhere.
Question Five: What did I do there?
Question Six: Wot Wot is a Redwall thing. That's actually a real book series (which you should read). Anyways "wot wot" is a verbal tic is specifically British, Georgian and an upper-class marker. Basically it's part of the British noble's dialect as in "Tally-ho, old bean, wot wot?". The exact meaning of the expression is hazy due to time but it means something like "huzzah" or "cheers". Howeaver it's mostly a thing people say, much like how Canadians put eh at the end of sentences, Singaporeans toss lah at the end of phrases, and Americans use the word 'like' at the end or middle of a sentence.
Regardless the Redwall Saga is famous for it's use of accents. All hares have an upper class British accent. Therefore, because Lyra strikes me as that sort of person, she uses that accent when speaking as her character.
Comment Two
First Question: Since this is a first person narrative the narrator is a character in the story. You therefore only know the information they know and choose to tell you. Cole put far more effort into her search then she mentioned.
Second Question: As for Meep's ability to get drunk, changelings still require liquids. Tissue Hydration, and nutrition are two different things. In this case changelings do not break down solid matter into energy, but they still have to use that energy to construct new tissues within their body. This process requires water. So while changelings do not eat solid food, they still need liquids. This means they must ingest substances, which means their bodies likely have a system for filtering out poisons, which means they can likely get drunk.
Also if she were shape shifted, she could get drunk anyways as at the time she is not a changeling, she is a _____, with the biology of a ______. Because I find the idea funny, drunk carries over from one form to another. Call it the Rule of Lolz.
Question Three: In my AU there are actually 12 different Hives. Each Hive is a nation of genetically distinct changelings differentiated by color (The color is always a gem or precious stone's color). (A later chapter explains this some more.)
While Meep believes their religion to be fake since she has seen Celestia control the sun and moon and is a scientist, the truth is the changeling gods are locked away in Tartarus. They had a yin and yang thing of good and evil going on. In the distant past all but one hive (Amber) followed the evil god, but slowly over time after the gods were banished they began to follow the good one despite the god no longer existing in their world. Today, only the Sapphire Hive follows the dark god Ra-Horakhty.
Question four: Once again, the narrator is Cole herself. You are seeing her perspective. I am well aware of how long a crush can last for.
Question five: God dammit... *headdesks* I had forgotten about that particular series. Oh well nothing to do now.
Question Six: While extreme emotion will cause a changeling to shift back to their normal form as part of the fight or flight responce, Meep actually has a changeling mental disorder. The particulars of it cause her to change back when she is both tired and excited. She is unaware of this as changelings did not have a concept of mental illnesses when she left her hive.
Harbinger much?
5632528 Shhhh! >> Bioware might be listening.
5632827 Don't worry, Concordant and Emperium of Man have their eyes out for bioware
5647033 Which book? I may have a digital copy.
5647233 No. To see an example of my introversion levels, read Horseshoes. Steel is basically just me, only a pony, and better at metalworking.
5647269 According to the Wiki for FiM the Royal Guard have been called by three different names int he show on occasion. I took each name and made them a separate branch of the military. Think of the Royal Guard as more of a police force and the EUP as a marine core.
5650770 Yeah, Lyra is usually presented as awesome. So I strove to make her the pinnacle of awesome.
5650806 Well I did base A LOT of changeling biology on ants. Soldiers are based on the species Proceratium google, which single handily hunt and kill spiders.
5632528 Huh?
The villain, not your code name...
Oh... You mean the villain that inspired my code name?
The same
Direct intervention is necessary. You will know pain.
5659737 Hey! Be nice or I'll make Twilight lecture at you.
5659743 Harbinger systems online
Cancel that.
Confirmed
Sorry about that... sometimes the Harbinger systems all but activate themselves...
5659799 Tell me about it. I have stories...
Finished reading through this today. I very much enjoyed this AU you've got here, and am very curious if your other stories are set in this same world, and am most certainly eager to find if the sequel to this is out yet.
I've really enjoyed all the characters you've got here, especially Meep herself. They're each so very different but they play against each other in such an enjoyable way. The continued reminders that all six of them are gamer geeks and love their D&D and stories and games was also a great touch, particularly when coupled with primarily Lyra and Colgate doing a lot of lampshade hanging.
5688563 Thanks for reading! I've been disheartened by the lack of comments and views recently. All of my stories take place in the same AU, They also all connect to one another but only enough to add flavor and depth. Each story is sill self contained. A Sequel to "The Bridesmaids is indeed underway I have drafted the plot outline and have the first chapters done... But I've been kind of depressed lately due to a lack of readers so It's gone unfinished (It could have been done by now. Easily. Just the sads :c).
I appreciate someone who enjoys the trope based humor tone I established ^>^ Did you get any of the references?
Also the appreciative opinion of Meep is very ... appreciated. She's sort of my pet character. Not to say she's a Mary Sue, she has actual real glaring problems she could stand to overcome (namely being a font of bad ideas and over reacting to situations due to over analyzing them) and I hope to god I managed to write her as a person >.> Regardless I am glad you like her! She of coerce will have a large if not staring role in the major works of the series. (I would very much love your opinion and thoughts about Meep in detail if you would care to PM them.)
5688582 I'll definitely be there to read it when you do get it out. I have enjoyed your take on the world immensely. I understand how you feel about the lack of feedback, though. It makes it hard to find the motivation.
And yes, I'm pretty sure that I caught most of the references (and shout outs) you made. Lyra pulling a pair of speeches from Conan had me in stitches, that was so unexpected. The GRUE robot, and the comment made earlier by Colgate about it being pitch dark and a Grue would eat them are both references to H.P. Lovecraft lore, I believe. I've never read the Cthulhu stuff (or played Call of Cthulhu) myself, but enough has spread through the gaming communities to be pretty certain of that reference. The Mass Effect and Redwall references were both pretty direct. There were also a couple quick references that I can't think of what they were off the top of my head now.
As far as the actual lampshade hanging...I am almost certain that a group of gamers that ended up in a situation like this would almost certainly react in this way. The remarks about cliches and someone 'angering the GM' serve as a way to relieve the tension and fear.
5688682
That and the old game Zork :3 the "Father of Cave Exploration Games".
Yup! As you can probably tell The Venture Bros is a big influence on the tongue in cheek nature of the humor here.
5689680 I've actually never played Zork, despite its status. I should probably hunt down that old program and try it one of these days. I didn't connect the way the humor is presented to Venture Bros originally, either, but I can see what you're meaning now. I should probably watch the rest of that series, it has some great ideas in it.
5689900 Don't bother with a copy of Zork, it probably wont run on a modern computer. See if you can find an emulated version.
5690185 Good point. In that case, I'll need to look up an emulator as well.
5690253 Hold on a moment, even better, here's all three Zork games in one package as a flash game.
http://www.gamefools.com/onlinegames/free/zorktrilogy.html
5690275 Nice! I'm going to have to pull that up once I get back from work.
Hmm... Interesting...
Anything with the term "Blue Eyes" in it is fatal. Just take a look at the Blue Eyes White Dragon from Yu-Gi-Oh!
But anyways, nice chapter.