"And you told them no?" Velvet stared at her incredulously. "Why the hay would you do that?! This is a once-in-a-lifetime event!"
Crystal groaned and rested her foreleg over her muzzle, clenching her eyes shut. "Because I didn't want to owe them. Maybe I can find another way in?"
Velvet sighed. She returned to her morning routine, her hindlegs stretched in a perfect split. "What about Princess Luna? Couldn't you ask her for an invitation?"
"What? No!" Crystal's ears pinned back. "She might think that I'm only friends with her for personal gain. I'd much rather owe my mother than do that."
"Then just go back and ask them." Velvet tucked one hindleg in and kept the other straight. She leaned forward and reached for her extended hoof.
Crystal stood up and started to pace while mumbling to herself before she finally said, "No, no. If I know my parents, they'll likely try again. They don't give up so easily." She plopped back down onto a pillow. "I just have to wait."
And wait she did, but neither of her parents came by. Every pony at school and at her favorite cafe were talking about the upcoming wedding, and the whole of Canterlot was so excited that it was nearly impossible to avoid the subject. To capitalize on the surging interest, every store was stocking up on matrimonial merchandise, making it even harder to ignore.
The first sign of the impending marriage-pocalypse happened at the grocery store, where Crystal saw two cantaloupes dressed in wedded bliss. One wore a little tiara and a veil while its companion had a top hat and bow tie. She tried to buy the bridealoupe, but the accessories were removed before it was put in the bag, and Velvet didn't believe her when she tried to explain why she bought it in the first place.
In the window of a small gift store were several plushies in the distinct likenesses of Lady Cadence and Captain Shining Armor. Crystal stopped in her tracks to press up against the glass, looking at the plush toys in disbelief. They were made well enough, but what caught her eye most was that their forehooves were sewn together, forever joined—at least, so long as the stitching didn't come loose.
Crystal almost bought one, but when she stepped into the store, she was scared away by the wave of giggles that followed when a mare exclaimed, "Look! Their horns light up!"
Another week went by and Velvet came home with her latest espousal discovery. She set down the bag she carried in her mouth and exclaimed, "Crystal, you won't believe what I found!"
Crystal looked up from her magazine. "Hmm?"
Velvet reached into the bag and lifted a wrapped object. She removed the paper and, with a big grin, held up the find: a white, gold-rimmed china plate with Lady Cadence's face painted on it. "It gets better!" she squealed as she set down the plate to retrieve a second one that similarly sported the face of Captain Shining Armor.
Crystal squinted at her. "Why—You—How much did those cost?"
Velvet rolled her eyes. "How can you ask that? I mean, the obvious question you should be asking is which one do you want?"
"I don't know?" Crystal's voice cracked as she fought a smile.
Velvet looked down at the painted eyes gazing back up at her. "I can't wait to eat off their faces. Their beautiful, regal faces. Whoever thought this was a good idea did not think this through.
"You finish off your mashed potatoes and bam!" Velvet flipped the plate toward Crystal again for effect. "Stop right there, hungry scum! You forgot your peas!"
Crystal shook her head, finally allowing herself to laugh, and looked back down at the magazine. She idly flipped to the next page. "This is getting ridiculous. I am just as excited for the wedding as everypony else, but really? Plates?"
"Do you think this craze will last until Nightmare Night?" Velvet asked, flopping over onto her back to gaze up at Shining Armor's visage in a playfully longing way. "I'd hate to be accosted by royalty."
"Are you even listening to me?" Crystal rolled her eyes.
"Hey! We should eat in tonight and use these!" Velvet tilted her head back to look up at Crystal at an odd angle. "We can have an elegant dinner party with royalty!"
Crystal returned the look with a playfully sour frown. "If you say royalty one more time, I'm getting my thesaurus and read it to you."
Velvet stuck out her tongue to blow a raspberry. "You're just bitter because you don't get to go."
"That's not confirmed yet! I just… have to…"
Velvet hummed to herself before she noticed the trailing silence and looked up at Crystal again. "Huh?" Noticing Crystal's wide-eyed expression, she rolled over to lay right-side up. "What's up?"
"I almost literally cannot even begin to comprehend this," Crystal said flatly, tapping on the magazine laid before her, then read aloud in a haughty voice, "'Precreating the Royal Wedding: What Might Be'."
Velvet blinked slowly. "What?"
Crystal's eyes scanned the six-page article. There were several pictures of wedding gowns that Cadence was photo manipulated into, examples of extravagant cake designs they might have, flower filly dress options, bouquet choices…
Velvet rested her chin on Crystal's shoulder to read with her before she snorted. "Okay, you're right. This is kind of getting ridiculous."
Without another word, Crystal stood up and walked over to the door. She tried on a few hats before settling on one, a floppy, wide-brimmed white hat with a blue ribbon.
"Where are you going?" Velvet asked, still reading over the article. "They have potential gift favors!"
"I'm going to talk to my mother." Crystal's tail flicked with agitation. "And I'm going to get into that wedding!"
Velvet flipped to the next page. "Good luck! And if you see any more plates, we need them!"
Crystal snorted and rolled her eyes before leaving the condo. She walked at a casual pace, humming to herself. The streets were busy with ponies hawking wedding wares.
Normally, Canterlot had better taste and kept itself above such blatant commercialism and fanaticism, but the impending marriage seemed to have everypony crazed. Crystal sighed. She, too, had to admit that all the buzz was getting her in a rather romantic mood. What if she even had the opportunity to catch the bouquet?
However, more than the nuptial accosting in the streets was what loomed above. Just the day prior, a magical barrier had been erected around the entire city, supposedly as part of the increased security to prepare for the impending prestigious event.
The number of guards posted on the walls and patrolling the roads had nearly tripled. A glance up at the shining forcefield sent a small shiver down her spine, so she did her best to keep her attention on the task before her.
When she arrived at her parents' home, Crystal brushed a hoof over her mane and coat to ensure everything was in place before she knocked on the door. She then quietly counted under her breath. Her mother would answer the door no less than five seconds after an unexpected knock. One must never seem too eager and give another the power, after all.
On six, the door opened. Upper Crust smiled when her gaze fixated on her daughter. "Well, hello, darling. What brings you by?"
There was no tiphoofing around the subject. Her mother would see through any flattering deception in an instant. Crystal straightened up and kept a firm stance. "I was hoping to discuss the matter of the upcoming wedding."
Crystal's stomach tied up in knots when Upper Crust smirked. "Oh?" She raised her brow. "I thought you weren't interested, darling."
Crystal begged her ears to not fold back. Stand at attention, soldiers, she chided them. "I was concerned that my schedule wouldn't allow for it, but—"
"I'm so terribly sorry," Upper Crust interrupted, pawing at the air, "but we just assumed that when you said no, that meant no. We no longer have the option of inviting you. The gardener is so looking forward to it now, and we'd hate to disappoint him."
One ear disobeyed orders and flicked in visible irritation. "What? I—" She cleared her throat. "I see. You're upset with me."
"Me? Upset with you?" Upper Crust put a hoof to her chest. "Why ever would I be upset? Neither of us has the time for nor the interest in one another these days. You're not the only one who is busy, darling. Time doesn't merely stop when you leave and we wait with bated breath for your return." She chuckled softly, shaking her head.
Crystal nearly hissed. Instead, she stuck her nose in the air and started to turn. "I'm sorry for wasting your time. Good day, Mother."
Upper Crust started to close the door. "Good day, darling."
Crystal's gait slowly quickened until she broke into a full-on gallop toward the spa. Her throat was tight and sore as she choked down her desire to scream in frustration.
She was angry at her mother, but she was angrier at herself for getting so worked up over a mere event. Now she had given her mother exactly what she had wanted: power. Just the thought of Upper Crust back there doing a little victory head bob made her hooves move faster.
She nearly skidded across the smooth tile when she burst through the doors of the Platinum Salon & Spa, exclaiming, "Full package!"
A familiar sage pegasus stood behind the counter. He raised one brow. "Do you have an appointment?"
She gaped at him. Her mouth flapped open and closed a few times before she threw her hooves in the air. "I don't have the strength to be perturbed by you, you… you!"
"Uh-huh." He looked down at a clipboard. "I don't see any of those words on the list, so. You'll have to take a seat and wait."
"No, I—"
One of the spa ponies leaned in through a door. "Oh, Miss Crystal! Don't mind him, he's just a temp. Come on back."
Crystal shot the pegasus a withering glare. "I'll deal with you some other time."
The pegasus simply nodded. "You have a pleasant day, too, ma'am."
Crystal tried to leave her stress in the waiting area when she stepped into the spa proper. Gentle music floated through the air and the smell of lavender enveloped her. Twin mares approached her, one carrying a robe and the other a glass of cucumber water.
Golden Fish had a honey-colored coat and a creamy mane and tail while her sister Conch Shell was the opposite. Other than their colors and cutie marks, they were identical from their sapphire blue eyes to the gentle smiles on their faces.
"Hello," Golden Fish said in her silky smooth voice as she draped the robe over Crystal's shoulders. "Welcome to relaxation."
"Let us help you let go of your problems," Conch Shell continued and offered the glass. "Did we hear correctly that you wish for the full package today?"
Crystal paused to drink the cool, crisp water. The cucumber twist tickled her taste buds and she replied with a contented sigh, "Yes. The full package, ladies."
Fish and Shell smiled at one another, then said together, "Right this way, ma'am."
♡
Crystal leaned back into the chair while the twins massaged her legs, a warm cloth draped over her eyes. The music floating in the air had shifted to a harp and its chords fell on her like a gentle rain.
"Both of you are from Canterlot?" she asked.
"Born and raised," one said.
Crystal groaned in the back of her throat. "And what of your parents?"
"The same," the other replied.
Crystal's magic lifted the corner of the cloth so that she could peer at the mare to her left, who turned out to be Golden Fish.
"I am having a bit of a struggle with mine," Crystal muttered.
Fish giggled softly. "Is that why you are so tense? Your parents?"
"Tsk, what other problem could a pretty, successful young mare have?" Shell chided her sister. "It must be the parents."
Fish merely shrugged.
The cloth lowered back to Crystal's face as she closed her eyes again. "They offered to get me an invitation to—to an event. I wanted to go, but I've also not been keen on owing them any favors since I moved out. But I also really wanted to go to the event, and they were my only way in."
Fish gasped. "You didn't say yes, did you?" She pouted when Shell glared at her. "I mean, please, roll onto your stomach."
Crystal obeyed and deft hooves started to work the knots out of her shoulders and lower back. She sighed and shook her head just slightly. "At first, I said no, but I went back and—"
"Oh, no, no." Fish shook her head, clicking her tongue against the roof of her mouth.
Crystal inclined her head to peer at Fish out of the corner of one eye. "I don't understand. How do you know it went poorly?"
Fish looked at Shell to silently ask permission. When her sister nodded, she looked back at Crystal and said, "Because that is how parents are, at least in Canterlot. Once you grow out of their mold, they cannot handle it, so that is how some cope. They lash out."
Shell added quietly, "They will get over it eventually, or at least, most do. It takes time." She smiled and her voice raised from a near whisper to a gentle murmur. "Why don't we listen to the music for a while? Your shoulders tell me this is hardly a relaxing conversation."
Crystal nodded and rested her face against the pillow, allowing her eyes to close though her mind still wandered on the topic of her mother.
It didn't take long for the soothing harp and skillful hooves to put her at ease, her stress slowly coaxed and massaged away.
♡
The day of the wedding had finally arrived, and every day prior was only a warm-up for the insanity that came with the celebration. Ponies from all over crowded the streets just to say that they were in the same city as the happily wed couple to-be. It also made getting anywhere extremely difficult.
"Excuse me, excuse me." Crystal sighed, uncertain why she even bothered with the pleasantries. Nopony could hear her over the excited chattering that echoed from every angle.
She finally made her way to the Phial and Filly, which, she discovered once she was inside, was rather empty. A sigh of relief escaped her at how the interior was the same as it always was. There was no Eau de Cadence, no Bridal Braid Care, nor any other thematic merchandise. There was just good old fashioned mare care products like normal.
"Hey, Crystal!" Runic smiled from behind the counter, then frowned. "What are you doing here?"
"I need the ultimate relaxation concoction," she answered as she perused the section of bath oils.
"No, I meant—" He gestured at the wall that separated them from a view of the castle. "I would have expected you to be at the wedding." He blinked when she responded with a loud groan. "Uh, that is to say—"
"It's fine," she interrupted, shaking her head. "That's just the reason why I need to relax. I really wanted to go to the wedding but, well." She rolled her eyes. "Here I am!"
Runic pushed a rock around the counter with his hooves like a schoolcolt drawing in the dirt. "Well, I'm glad you're here. It's been kinda quiet lately."
Crystal stared at him. She looked out the windows from where the faint noise of squeals and shouting came. She then looked back at him with one brow raised.
He returned the look with a grin. "But since you're here anyway, do you want to see something that rocks?"
Her lips wiggled as she tried not to grin herself. "Is it a rock?"
"Nope!" He picked up a basket and set it on the counter. "It's a bunch of rocks!"
She finally giggled and trotted over, levitating a few to examine them. "And what's the story behind these?"
He blinked. "Huh? The story?"
"Oh." She turned the rocks she magically held around before setting them down. "Anyway, they're very neat rocks."
"Aren't they?" He lit back up. "These are some of my new favorites. My old favorites are in the back, where I'll put these, but I'm just not done looking at them yet." He sighed wistfully and wrapped his forelegs around the basket. "All of my most recent successes!"
She smiled, returning to the aisles to peruse his alchemical wares. "What are you going to do with the old rocks?" she asked as she tried to decide between two bottles in particular.
"Do with them? I'll keep them where they are in the rock vault, of course! Well, I might move a few around to put some of these in their spots, but I don't think you're interested in rock organization." His ears perked upright with a sudden spark of hope. "Or are you?"
Crystal cleared her throat and raised up the two bottles. "I'll be happy to listen after you explain to me the difference between luscious rose and silky rose shampoo."
Runic put on his most serious face, which still wasn't very serious on him. "How would I know? I just ask the thesaurus." The coltish smile returned. "So, you see, I like to organize my rocks first by their sizes with the big ones in the back so the little ones don't get blocked. That way, when I look into the vault I can see them all. Next…"
Crystal kept one ear facing toward him, making a note of his organizational preferences in case it ever came up later, or if he had a pop quiz to go with the explanation. It all seemed fairly straightforward until he started to delve into a lecture on the differences between arkose and greywacke sandstones.
That was when both his words and her concentration were interrupted by the two most unsettling sounds to ever grace their ears.
First, there were screams of terror that ran Crystal's blood cold. It wasn't uncommon for Canterlot ponies to overreact to something simple and scream at it, such as an array of mismatching hats or a spilled latte, but the pitch of the ones coming from outside were not in the dramatic range.
They were much further toward the terrified end of the scale.
Then came the buzzing. It hummed through the air and bore its way into her skull: a dull, throbbing annoyance. It grew louder, presumably closer, and as it did, the screams grew more hysterical. The sound gave the impression that a swarm of locusts were invading the city; however, Crystal had a very sinking feeling the source was no mere insect.
All at once, her breath caught in her throat and her eyes went wide. She knew then what was happening: whatever that ominous barrier had been keeping out had finally gotten in.
Crystal slowly turned, dreading what she might see, to look out into the streets through the windows. Ponies ran in all directions and black, terrifying figures zipped through the air after them. Her heart pounded and she backed up into the display behind her.
Her head jerked back to look over at Runic, who was no longer standing behind the counter. He was suddenly standing beside her, his eyes narrowed while he stared at the chaos outside.
Without looking at her, he asked a simple yet enigmatic question: "Do you trust me?"
This has been driving me nuts for awhile. The word count for the story always seems to be even, what dark sorcery are you using to do this?
5844234 The very secretive, elusive art of stubbornness.
It was a challenge I set for myself at the very beginning, because I legitimately do like numbers that end in 0s (they're just so pleasing to the eye), and has now become a battle of stubbornness against myself. It also pushes me to re-read a chapter and look for weaker places to add more detail so I can bump the word count up to the nearest hundred. I struggle with descriptions, so it helps me be more aware when I lack them.
I can't wait to see what happens. Great job with this chapter. Good luck.
Mere words cannot describe the need I have for those plate.
I was wondering where Crystal was during this. Great to know.... But I must say.... Cliffhanger? Really? This awesome chapter is being offset by the love/hate I have for cliffhangers! Oh well, I'll get over it. Can't wait for Tuesday!
5844234
HA! So I wasn't the only one! :P
5844293 I saw it an I was just amazed. You clearly put a lot of effort into them
Can't wait to see how was the changeling attack from Crystal's POV :) But the cliffhangeeeeer, why are you doing this to us
Haha this wedding crazyness. I wonder if after the wedding you will find some set with Queen Chrysalis (and the Special Captain Shiny dildo)
5844503
As it was so delicately put in this very chapter... "Look! Their horns light up!"
Oddly, despite this pony's quirks, there are few places I would rather be in a changeling invasion. When they come, always stick close to the inventive nuts.
A really exciting place to have our Crystal! And this is why I am addicted to this story.
Well written. Relateable and interesting characters and personal situations. Surprising turns. Weekly updates.
Who wouldn't like this story? Besides cloppers, the dark and jaded, sci-fi cadets, and persons without a soul.
All hail Crystal! The Queen of the Word Count!
5844509
You are a horrible, horrible person for putting that image in my head. I will never look at this chapter the same way again.
5844771 I do like to take ample pride for a job well done. C:
The plates though, I'm dying.
Great chapter! Can't wait for the next one. As in, I literally don't know if I'm able to wait for the next one. I may explode before then
5844255 Thank you!
5844287 5844464 Of course cliffhanger! I mean, after all, the version in Memoirs is 3 parts, so I at least have to have two... It's a major event, after all!
5844503 I had a lot of fun with the wedding-crazed insanity. I won't lie; I giggled aloud much more than once.
5844553 Thank you so much. It's been a wonderful journey writing all those things you like and I hope it continues to please as we go along! And I accept the title quite proudly!
5845201 Don't you just want to eat off their faces? Honestly, Velvet is probably more my favorite character when it comes to humor. She's such a goofball.
Thank you everyone!
5845347 The layers are definitely present. :3
marriage-pocalypse *shudders* The very words make me wanna hide in a bunker.
Well it seems Velvet got all swept up in the crazyness... I dont think I would want to be eating, scoop up some mashed potatos and see a freaking eye staring at me!
This was a fun chapter, you had a nice build up to the EVIL CLIFFHANGER YOU HAVE LEFT IT ON! Good work! now I want the next chapter now! And I remember something about Silent seeing explosions from the palace coming from Runic's shop.. Oh i wanna see crystal pitching bottles of chemicals now!
Ahahaha! Dem plates! Stop right there hungry scum! Hopefully Crystal doesn't miss out on too much, oh wait. Here comes the changelings...It's a good thing she is with Runic. He probably has some interesting idea up his sleeve. "Do you trust me?" he says as he pulls out a quad .50 AA machine gun turret...that would be awesome Oh yeah about that quote...where have I heard that before? Wasn't it from some movie made by Disney? Could it have been Aladdin? ....Naaaaa no way!
I don't know what to ship
"Do you trust me?"
"If I say 'yes', will that help my chances of getting out of this alive?"
"It won't hurt your chances."
"... good enough."
5845357 Hehe! I wanted it to escalate rather abruptly, to try and give the appropriate feeling... and to make the cliffhanger more painful. Oh gosh, Velvet was so much fun to write in this chapter. And you do remember correctly!
5846106 Yes way! He can show her the world...
5846120 Neither does Crystal!
5846252 Exactly. After all, I'd rather try Runic's crazy scheme than take my chances with the changelings!
5846573 Muhahahaha cant wait to read it either way. Explosions are awesome! And rocks! Oh what if a changling knocks over and breaks his current favorite rocks? ...... My Faust have mercy on the poor buggy's soul for I doubt Runic will have any
5846573 Shining, simmering, splendid. Tell me, Crystal, now when did you last let your heart decide...
5846622 Crimes against rocks can never be permitted. Ever...
5846736 Especially to rare rocks.
5846573 5846736
Really, you two? This is Runic Phial we're talking about; get your own lyrics right!
I can blow up the world
Scorching, shattering, shrapnel
Tell me, Crystal, now when were you last
Running for your life....
I almost expected Velvet to pull the plushie set out of the bag! And it's great to see CW doing well enough to afford the "Full Treatment". Always fun to read!
I'll tell you this, I would totally trust Runic. Ponies like him are exactly the kind of ponies you want around in tough situations.
5847014 And that's why you're best pony, Phyco.
5847244 Pff, Velvet has more class than that! China all the way! Also, many happy Fluttershys for you! I didn't want to explicitly throw it in y'alls faces. "It's so nice that we have more money now~" Velvet said, fanning herself with a pile of bits. I was hoping the frivolous spending and the spa would be enough and since you caught it, I'm considering it a success!
5847709 Runic's getting down to business to defeat the changelings.
5848188
I've been looking forward to hearing his side of the battle since you got to the beginning of the wedding arc. Even the distant descriptions of it in Memoirs were cool, so I can't wait to see what awesomeness and undoubtedly absurd shenanigans he has in store for the changelings from a closer perspective.
5848195 I really hope I don't disappoint! I am having a lot of fun writing it, though. I've never written a very action-packed scene before so it's a new challenge!
5848202
You've yet to disappoint up to this point, so I have no doubt you'll live up to the precedent you've set.
5848188
Pony?
I mean, yes! I am best pony! Pony specifically, and not some other roguishly handsome creature in disguise, nosire!
Neigh!
Bwhahahahaha!
Silly Crystal, if you wanted to attend the wedding, saying no to a gift-wrapped invitation was a mistake. Ehh, maybe you'll be able to get an invite for the next one.
You know, Runic's shop might actually be a pretty good place to be during the attack. Any invading changelings just might not know what hit them.
Welp, I did it! I'm all caught up.
Crystal, you truly live up to your namesake character. :3 Having read Anzel's Memoirs, it is an additional joy to get the connecting stories from the other perspective. It just made it all a truly fun read. :3
5845318
Yes I do. And Velvet is just perfect
I've been listening to a song all day now and I immediately want to put Shia LaBeouf's face on all the changelings
5854353 I have a guess as to what that song is... Could be wrong, but does it go something like this?
You're shopping at the store. There's no customers, and the clerk is weird. Out of the corner of your eye you spot them... Changeling Attack.
Running for your life! (From changeling attack) They're brandishing their fangs! (It's a changeling attack)
5856728 Yes, Yes it would probably go something like that.
ShadowMimic, not sure why you deleted your post - it was actually an interesting theory (that Runic is a changeling). I kind of wish it were true!
Ooooh. I like where this is going! Runic's a fun character.Now I'm starting to ship Crystal and him. Gah! Anywho, can't wait to see what Crystal and Rune are up to. Weeee! Perhaps they'll chuck rocks at the changelings. Maybe . . . XD
5860319 Throw my most prized possessions at attackers ?! Inconceivable!
5860456 Fly, my lovelies!
marathontalk.com/boyontherun/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/pict123.jpg
First Golden Pants called Crystal "Fishes" and now there's a Golden Fish(es). I can't figure out what you're up to, but I've got my eye on you...
I knew that Upper Crust was descending into Manipulative Bitch territory.
HE'S A CHANGELING
Him!
I like Runic. He's delightfully different. And he seems to know something. Hmmmm.
A thing that's always delighted me about this story is the way you work in the ears. Having worked with horses in rl, it's a common enough thing I'm explainng to new volunteers - that they emote primarily with their ears. The moment here, stand at attention, soldiers! was one of the oddly cutest examples.
Upper Crust is. well, she's not being very nice, and petty too, but! I'm not giving up hope on her. I think she might be working through some stuff, towards a new leaf of sorts.
What an odd question to ask, Runic. "Do you trust me?" Looks like the CloudCuckooLander might be about to do some serious BunnyEarsLawyering. Oh god I even speak in tropes now. Points if you understand the terminologies. I can't be the only troper here, please surely not...
5848777 Rocks. They be hit with rocks. Unless that's not on, because the arrangement is too nice to disturb.
OOh, oh! Bath bombs!
6899748 It's neat to see you enjoying this so much, Ambion. Crystal (and Anzel!) could do with more attention from the wider Fimfic author community.
6899748 I love, love, love using their ears It's one of my favorite things about writing ponies! I try to remember they have tails, too, but I just don't use those nearly as much as I incorporate the ears. I get sometimes a little less horse and a little more dog when they flop about, but I love ears nonetheless!
6900637 I need to remember the ears when I write my fictions. I keep forgetting.