Hi, I'm EllyCoo. But you can call me Elly or Amy. I'm french so excuse my grammar errors and all that. Thanks! Hope you like stuff I do
Twilight Sparkle told you what happened during her trip to the human world. But none of you know what exactly happened.
Dear Princess Celestia, I'm not coming back, but I want you to know what happened.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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I'll be honest.
You mean they broke up because Flash went insane? That's odd.
The concept of Sunset writing a letter to Celestia about the who ordeal feels rather unique.
However, I think this fic could've been better. First off, The grammar. Yeah, I can understand that English is a very complex language. But that doesn't mean that it should prevent you from writing well. For example:
"And Flash went mad and left me."
A better way of writing that would be. "Then Flash got mad when he found out, and broke up with me."
So, I recommend that you get some more help on improving your grammar.
Second, the letter feels pretty bland. It's just nothing but exposition all the way through. Recapping the comics and the first film. It would've been nice if you at least put how she felt about these issues; because it feels as if she was writing her a report on her experiences than a letter on why she won't comeback.
So, overall, it wasn't terrible, just not good. However, I will acknowledge your efforts.
5174948 Thanks! And I didn't mean Flash went insane... xD
5175764
You're Welcome, my friend.
PS: Sorry about where it reads "the who ordeal", it was meant to say "the whole ordeal".
This is a nice little story. I had to read it twice to make sure I didn't misread a few parts, but I feel it was well done.
Can't wait to see what you come up with next!
I wish people would write more about Sunset and her relationship with Celestia more, but you get what you get. I got real emotional about the part where Flash broke up with Sunset, well both actually. I won't lie, I don't care for Flash Sentry, I'm a Trixie fan first, and Silver Spoon is best filly.
5179820 Geez thanks ;v;
5179958 I'm sorry, did I offend you? If I did I'm sorry I meant nothing of it.
5179999 ??? No you didn't.
"And Flash went mad and left me."
So Flash Sentry can channel Saidin and the Taint drove him mad now?
This is a nice little story. Very interesting concept on the story of Sunset!
5189219 Thanks!
5176095
5174948
Write once, Spell Check twice, grasshopper!
5222866
Oh, the irony.
5179999 THOSE WERE TEARS OF JOY, MAN!
But, in all honesty, it's true. Friendship can be the most powerful thing ever, but it that also makes it extremely dangerous, too. I am kinda on Sunset's side.
6449229 coming back just to reply to this ; yeah, i always thought the EQG story was kinda dumb and unexplained, so... and Sunset deserved to be more likeable :'D
interesting.
huh
Didn't expect that pony was flash.
how sad.
She had it coming without a doubt.