Bill Cosby Fights a T-Rex
In some plane of reality, Tribbles and Parasprites wage an endless bloody war while HAL-9000 and Cortana play Yahtzee. The amazing impossibility of all this made Steven Hawking quit his job and become a rodeo clown.
Elsewhere, Squiggle Force Nine had assembled to play checkers.
"King me." Michael Bay smiled. The checker board exploded, sending checkers flying.
"That's the fifth board in eleven minutes." Loki exclaimed, "The last one grew spider legs, the one before that liquefied, and the one before that went quantum!"
"Maybe checkers just isn't our thing." Pinkie offered.
"Yea!" Discord cheered. "Let's play Twister!"
Sheogorath ran over and turned on a radio. It began playing that creepy music you often hear in horror movies, and the whole group danced.
"This isn't Twister." Pinkie Pie whispered to Discord.
"I know." He laughed, "That's what makes it beautiful."
"No!" The Human cut in, "No One Direction reference! Not here, not ever!"
"Is this a bad time?" Caboose interrupted.
"For what?" Michael asked. Caboose merely pointed.
"How did you manage to get a sail boat wedged half way through a brick wall." Pinkie sputtered.
"Not my fault someone put a wall in my way. And it isn't the first time." Caboose said blankly. Loki could only sit down and put his head in his hands.
"I think it's time I reevaluate whom I spend my free time with."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Richard Nixon tap-danced while the Dali Lama played an electric guitar.
"Burn the Christmas tree with a sack of lemons!" Richard Nixon sang, "Adam West took my money and I went for broke!"
The human laughed. "Wow, I love watching football!"
"Popcorn?" Sheogorath offered, handing him jelly beans.
"Don't mind if I do." The human said, taking a handful and throwing them at the television. Elsewhere, Richard Nixon got hit in the eye with a jelly bean.
"I brought food." Pinkie Pie smiled, carting in a whole layout of pastries.
"Oh boy! Something edible!" Michael Bay squealed with joy, munching on a muffin.
"Let there be cake! Hallelujah. Gesundheit." Caboose said, utterly detached from the mortal plain on reality. In fact, Caboose was a god. That sort of explains things like the platypus and Michael Jackson.
No one saw, due to no one being around. The crater where Squiggle Force Nine had saved the planet, the galaxy, and the entire universe. A hand had emerged from the ground, grasping the air. Zombie Old Spice Guy and Regular Deadpool.
Deadpool looked at the camera.
"The reason I'm fine is cause I already look like a zombie under the suit." He said, winking.
"Revenge." Zombie Old Spice Guy seethed, "Revenge!"
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Que animatronic André Rieu (I don't care if I mis-spelled that) playing Bink's Sake.
Huh, so this is what insanity looks like.
Aw, I wanted to see Bill Cosby.
Wait! Why doesn't the cobra shoot out rainbows? It's more random that way
Dude, what drugs are you on and where can I get some?
Me: This is madness!
Caboose: Madness?
Caboose: This. is. Squiggle Force Nine!
*Shoots me with Sheila*
encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTPGrIqlkZfasamRr-JOzcBEHGieWAIYbvoX4Q8gSPqnvA1yh8R
Mind if I make a suggestion for a cameo appearance?
Fawful, from the Mario & Luigi handheld RPG series. Here's a few samples of his dialogue.
Huh. It's not dead.
Surprisingly, I didn't laugh. MAKE ME LAUGH YOU CHIMPANZEE GOD OF COMEDY! I NEED THE LULZ! IT'S PART OF MY HEALTH TO BURST OUT LAUGHING EVERY DAY!
I... I don't know what to think anymore.
...
...
...
Someone help me please.
Remember that South Park episode where Cartman laughed so hard he couldn't laugh anymore?
Author, why? Why, you dirty brilliant bastard, why? I lived a happy life, I never asked for this!
I love this story because it is a mind destroyer.
I . .Uhh . .
. . .
I can now Taste Location.
Damnit! The last time you updated I puked a rainbow, But now I can feel color!
...
'Tis was beautiful.
MORE!!!
I'm telling you...when I get the ability to read this without dyieng of laughter I will ready this one to
Author.....
We need space ninjas.
5170882 Space Pirate Ninjas with Jetpacks.
5172924
Space pirate monk ninja dinosaurs that fly while shooting lazers from their eyes.
5174988 WITH LAZER SHOTGUNS!!!!! LAZER MOTHER!@#!ING SHOTGUNSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
5180810
AND NUKES THAT COME OUT OF THEIR BALLS!
5184341 Bow chika bow wow
5184596
GODDAMNIT TUCKER!
(rvb reference)
5184610 Shoutout to that last seasons finale, fucking amazing and I was so happy about that little secret after the credits.
5184620
WHAT SECRET.
I closed it when the credits began.
Edit: Nvm
5184628 I'll give you a hint, it was a shipment of armor belonging to a freelancer....
5187544
THAT WAS THE CHAIRMAN, NOT A FREELANCER!
Also, do you not think this is.....
Off topic?
5196303 On the computer screen there was a picture of a helmet and next to it were the words "Agent Maine" AKA the meta AKA MAH FAVORITE RVB CHARACTER!!
5196530
.....
yay.
5196644 Louder. (Long running brony scenario is long running)
5196661
YAY!
5198764 Noice.
You have literally managed to out-random everything I have ever encountered before! And I've encountered a TON of randomness!
Hello and good morning or afternoon or whatever time you're reading this at.
Let me introduce myself, I'm the sack of shit that's gonna write a serious review about this.
All in all, I'd give this a nine.
I hardly enjoyed the two predecessors to this story, and, frankly, I can't even tell you why I decided to read this one.
Maybe I hoped you had improved.
Because, well, let me put it this way: you can write fairly well. The sentences you from, in themselves, make for good sentences, not looking at the contents of course.
Because, oh boy, those contents.
I don't even know where to start. I'd like to quote zeusdemigod131 on this.
Except it isn't. What you've done here, doesn't even qualify for random anymore. This work is merely a collection of 'randumb' (Google it, the explaination for that term is quite lengthy), not for the sake of comedy, but just for the sake of random. If you were to send this story to the Guinness Book of World Record along with a letter stating "I have achieved world's highest meme density", then I wouldn't be surprised if you made it in.
Now, I know that tastes differ from person to person, and I can't whine about what you wrote just because our tastes differ. But, to be frank, I can hardly find any taste in here at all. This whole story is just "haha something random happened" repeated over and over and over and over. Which isn't even that funny the first time. And you know, or at least should know, that repetition equals decrease in humor.
Also, you made a few spelling errors, and you keep writing 'then' instead of 'than'. Just pointing it out.
I really think you could rite something far, far better than this if you'd just actually write about something. Anything at all.
All in all, I rate this story a nine.
Out of hundred.
5453590 Must admit, your mostly right. I don't really intend on writing much more like this anyhow. I am just trying to find the genre I excel in.....still working on that.
5457560
WOAH.... That guy just insulted the BUCK out of this story, and you didn't insult back. You must be insulted by things even less than me. (Which is like the level of someone you love telling you that they hate you and never want to see you again, and I just laugh and say 'typical', and walk away)
How did you not insult him so very badly?
5493577 I while back I learned a life lesson.
"Ce est la vie." Or simply put, "That is life." Or better yet.
"It is what it is."
When life gives me lemons, I shrug.
Either that or hand life back an orange.
5496896
(Such bad jokes)
I learned that too, but if life hands me rotten lemons, (that 'sack of shit', as he called himself), I learned to give them right back to life.... in its exact change in bullets. Any who, I'm not a naturally violent person, but if someone insults me, then imma be insulting back twice as hard (Something my friends and family will never find out).
But I guess that's just me. By you saying 'handing life back an orange', I would think that your the person who would say, "the sky is green, so potatoes will fly, and next Monday will be a doozy!" and just walk away as others stare at you like you need to go to a psych ward. But as you said, Ce est la vie.
On a completely unrelated note, I like you. I have ESP, if you believe in that stuff, and sometime feel things for no reason. Either that, or I'm just more sensitive from all the estrogen coursing through my body from being bi. But I digress. This may seem weird, but whatever it is that's affecting me says that you are a special type of person, one not commonly found. You might say you're a, 'rarity'.
I will not forget you.... strange.... internet.... moth? Huh........ who am I typing to again?
5606483 darn it.....
Loved him in the Ghost Rider movies.
Nicholas Cage forever.
WHERE IS OLD MAN HENDERSON!? WE NEED HIS RANDOM! In other news, I loved this story to no end, keep up the lolz.
I can now see past the BBQ flavored veil of reality, into the nothingness of Taco Bell. And Wallmart.
"And thus" Super Mega Death Jesus said. "My work here is done" He turned and proceeded to hover into the bubble gum wrapper of infinite Bacon.
I love random shit, makes me smile~
HAHAHAAHAHAHA! BUH-NAN-UH! :D
Nice job!