Tales of a Former Ponyville Librarian

by ArtieStroke

Chapter 3

I gulped, looking over at the three spa workers- particularly the big, buff pegasus with the comically small wings.

Maybe a spa outing was too daunting an outing.

"Don't worry, Bulk's an absolute sweet heart- and absolutely divine with those hooves of his," Rarity said, picking up on my nervousness. I swear, that girl was too good at reading people. Either that or the quill on my butt also meant I was basically an open book. Damn.

"It's absolutely fine to be nervous about your first time-"

I snorted, earning an immediately pout from Rarity.

"Crass, darling- and as I was saying, I'm sure Bulk won't go too hard on you-"

I tried to hold back another snort. I really did.

But Rarity made it way too easy for me- and soon enough I was on the receiving end of the magazine she was reading.

"Palette Brush you stop twisting my words this instant!"

"Stop making it so easy to do so, then." I muttered, rubbing my snout. Snout? Nose? Muzzle? What do you call it on tiny horses? Eh, whatever.

"Really, it's remarkable how we're even friends."

"It's because you loooooooove my shenanigans so much," I said, batting my eyelashes over-dramatically. Rarity simply rolled hers.

"Behave yourself- it's about our turn now, anyways."

Fixing her face back to her normal level of business-calm, Rarity hopped up from the seat as the two spa mares waved us over.

"Miss Rarity, if you would follow myself," The blue one said, while the pink one gave me a wink.

"Do no worry, you are in the most capable of hooves!"

Uhuh. Sure.

I was led down a hall into one of the small massage rooms, the smell of fresh linens hanging on the air with the sounds of a soothing forest river coming from somewhere. Probably magic- spend enough time in pony land and you start accepting most anything you can't explain is probably magic.

Climbing onto the table, I let out a long sigh. I hope I didn't have to-

The sound of the door sliding open interrupted my hopes, re: waiting, as that Bulk pony stepped through.

"Good afternoon, miss Brush! My name is Bulk Biceps and I will be taking care of you today!"

Jiminy Christmas- it's like he was trying not to yell every word he spoke, and not quite succeeding at it.

"Aloe and Lotus tell me this is your first massage?"

"Eh- yup. First time."

Bulk nodded, trotting over, "It's alright to be nervous! When I first started school for this, I was pretty nervous too, on account of being afraid of crushing other ponies with my massive body."

A nervous laugh escaped me, and I quickly clamped my mouth shut.

"I'm sorry, that wasn't very nice of-"

"Totally fine! Just trying to ease the tension with a joke!"

Well, Rarity wasn't lying when she said he was a sweet heart. I settled down further into the table.

"Alright, consider myself eased. Work your magic, mister Biceps."

"Please, mister Biceps was my father."

I laughed a little more at that- and then suddenly his hooves were working into my shoulders and the world stopped.

Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh my god.

Holy crap.

"You carry a lot of tension in your spine, do you hunch over a lot?"

I barely manage to gurgle out a yes before regaining control of my faculties.

"Just, you know- at a desk most of the day... oh man..." Was I really holding in so much tension? I felt like jell-o, what was this sorcery.

"It's amazing what a little good posture can do for your health! I also work as a personal trainer at the Ponyville Gym, so I know a couple things about taking care of a body!"

I bet you do holy god, moses, and the burning bush itself.

"If you could exhale on the count of three for me?"

Bulk counted down, and I obliged when he put a firm hoof in the middle of my back and-

CRACK.

"OH GOD that was so good..."

"It's what I do, miss!"

I need to spa more often.

---

"And then he cracked my back and I swear to all things holy- Rarity, I achieved nirvana right then and there."

Rarity giggled, sipping on a fruity drink in the mud bath right next to mine, cucumbers over our eyes.

"Now, I don't want to say I told you so~"

"But you absolutely one hundred percent told me so." I finished, sinking with a sigh further into the mud. If this weren't so insanely expensive, I'd be joining Rarity every week on these now.

"Glad to see you taking a break from the sarcasm, darling."

"What can I say, after a religious experience like that? My defenses are just kaput," I said, with a sigh, "Like a Joss Whedon character, stripped off all the snark- just leaving the core of a girl who's so afraid of making a social blunder she actively pushes people away so she never gets the chance."

There was a beat of silence, and I lifted up one of my cucumbers to see Rarity giving me a very intense look.

"What?"

"I worry about you very much, Palette."

I groan, "Look, I'm- well, MOSTLY being facetious here. I like people- honest, I do, don't give me that look! I just... I only have so much energy, and too many ponies to spend them on."

I wonder what the equivalent of going to the gym for getting sick gains but with being sociable would be. Talking to a shrink?

Probably.

"Well, hopefully you have the energy for the Summer Sun Celebration," Rarity said, "I'd be very put out to see you miss your first one- well... one that you can remember, at least."

"My- yup! Amnesia, ain't that just the way?"

I need to tell Rarity the truth some day. Jeeze.