Celestia trotted into the hedge garden behind the castle. The sky was a bright hazy blue, the heat of the sun drove the aroma off the leaves of the lavender and rosemary bushes and into the air, birds sang, and crickets chirped. This day was all the more beautiful to her because she had waited so long for it.
She quickly found the lopsided statue of her old draconequine nemesis. Her horn began to glow, and she touched it to the statue's belly. A patch of color appeared on the white marble there and began to spread. The frozen white fur glowed with color and began to ripple in the wind, and the scales glistened in the sunlight. Last of all, the stone eyes came to life. Discord quickly locked eyes with the princess. He jumped away and arched his back in a more threatening pose.
"Back for more so soon?" he asked. "Did you finally tire of your little proteges? Or are they waiting around the corner to blast me again with—"
Celestia raised a hoof to interrupt. "No, no, stop. Time's up."
The cocky look on Discord's face vanished. "What? Are you sure?" His moustache drooped sulkily. "I spent an entire year preparing my banter!"
"I'm sure. Add it up. I ruled the first three thousand years. Then you had a thousand, then I had a thousand."
Discord pursed his lips moodily. "I think the first two thousand were more of a tie."
Celestia smiled her radiant sun-goddess smile. "If you say so. Now, let's see. I counted two hundred seventy-five thousand, three hundred and ninety-one songs, poems, stories, plays, paintings, sculptures, and other artistic works about me, and ... forty-four thousand, six hundred and seventeen about you. Oooh. That must smart."
"I'm more difficult to draw!" Discord protested.
"Nonsense," Celestia said. "You're far easier, since it's practically impossible to draw you wrong."
"Now you're just being mean, Tia," Discord whined. "I don't think I want to play anymore."
"Don't be a sore loser," Celestia said. "Just a short game. Two thousand years."
Discord eyed her warily. "No turning anypony into a statue this time?"
Celestia's smile lost a little of its radiance. "Oh ..." She kicked a pebble along the flagstone path with one hoof. "All right. No statues."
Discord frowned down at the ground for several seconds, then looked up at her. "Okay," he said reluctantly. "But this time, I get to play white."
Wait, what?
*headsplosion*
Sadly, Discord forgot to rule out being sent to the moon.
Now I have to go ponder if "black" and "white" refers primarily to who goes first, ala chess, or if Discord gets to be the hero and Celestia the villain this time.
814928
"Now I have to go ponder if "black" and "white" refers primarily to who goes first, ala chess, or if Discord gets to be the hero and Celestia the villain this time."
The answer is: Whichever one is funnier to you. Or more disturbing.
I would've had him say, "I get to be the good guy," but I wanted them to not even make a value judgement about it - just talk about it like it was the difference between the black pieces and the white pieces.
Maybe the best ending is to leave you wondering?
I would definitely read the logical continuance of this story.
You know what this made me realize?
There are all sorts of alternate universe fanfictions reversing Celestia and Nightmare Moon in some way- RainbowDoubleDash's Lunaverse, where Princess Luna has ruled alone for a thousand years since Solar Flare was banished to the sun; Sunshine and Fire, where Celestia, Luna, Twilight Sparkle and Spike are thrown into a world where Daymare Sun rules with an iron hoof; Night's Favoured Child, where Nightmare Moon rules Equestria in a surprisingly peaceful eternal night and serves as Twilight Sparkle's mentor in magic- and yet I don't recall ever encountering one swapping Celestia and Discord.
This could be interesting to write.
1236004 I would be interested to read that.
And I agree that the best endings are the ones you figure out for yourself. Which is why one of my favourite plays is "Time and the Conways"
This one:
Reminded me oddly of Shirley Jackson's wonderful 1955 short story "One Ordinary Day, With Peanuts." Now that's a story that could be interestingly ponified--like you did with LeGuin's "Omelas"... Might be I'll hafta look into doing that...
Lovely collection of pieces here, by the way!
Mike
DAMN! Awesome!
Oooh what a twist.
1236004 Celestia and Luna break free from being statues after 1000 years and try and overthrow Discord, only to be stopped by his most faithful student Twilight Screwball, who has also proven that 2 + 2 = fish.
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And that's a fish, and that's a fish...
But is the door a fish?
(This is a real game, and it's awesomely fun for people who have figured it out)
I see a lot of comments here, but what I don't see is how they'd reset the board?
5742360
Celestia bursts cackling onto the scene and the heroic Discord opposes her!
That said I do think such would make for a fascinating story, even if it paints them both as total sociopaths and leaves the Luna problem way up in the air
As short what-if's go, this one is pretty chilling. Good job!
Very intriguing!
It's definitely got lots & lots of disturbing implications...
I... Huh. Well, that's not something you see everyday. I'd almost love to see a continuation of this story, maybe a 10-15k word one-shot, but like a lot of these "what-if" type scenarios, I know it works better as a very short standalone, to leave the audience wondering at its implications.
I also like to imagine that Discord is being literal with that last line, that they're not talking about game pieces or being metaphorical about good/evil, but rather that he means he would literally have a white coat and Celestia would have a brown coat or something.
One minor quibble: not that I'm an expert on insects, but I'm not aware of beetles that make noise. Cicadas are the main insects that I can think of which make noise during the daylight rather than at night, and they aren't beetles.
9677049 Some beetles make noise, but I think you're right that most don't. I should change that.
Wouldn't that make the story pointless and boring?