The Ballad of Rainbow Dash and Time Turner: Give A Little Love

by dramatic_spoon

Someday

“Um…” Dash trailed off, uncertain what to say.

“If you’re too busy, I can come back later,” Ditzy beamed.

“No!” Dash blurted out, just slightly too quickly and too loudly. “I mean… yeah, come in.”

Dash turned around and trotted back into the kitchen with Ditzy following her. Tank slowly looked at the two as Ditzy sat at the kitchen table. Dash yanked open a cabinet and reached in.

“You want something to drink? I haven’t gotten a chance to restock my stuff, but I got instant coffee.”

“No, no…” Ditzy waved a hoof as Dash pulled out two glasses, “I had coffee at Rarity’s.”

Crash

Dash froze up, dropping both glasses onto the countertop. Tank looked over, still chewing his lettuce.

“You alright?” Ditzy asked.

“Fine, just… just something bit me,” Dash replied as she cleaned up the shattered glass. The mare tossed the mess into a trash can and pulled out another pair of glasses.
“Is water fine?”

“No, I’m good.”

Dash trotted back into the kitchen with her glass of water. The mare took her seat and took a sip of her water.

“So what’s up?”

“I just was going to ask about last night,” Ditzy calmly responded, “Time Turner still looked pretty haggard.”

“…I’d rather not talk about it,” Dash responded, averting from Ditzy’s gaze.

“Oh come on, he rarely gets that drunk,” Ditzy pressed on, “It had to be something big.”

“…Well, it’s like this…” Dash sighed, “I found out who Rarity’s dating and kinda, sorta made fool out of myself.”

“…This wasn’t like the whole thing wi-”

“No, nothing like that.” Dash paused, “She told me it was somepony I knew and… well… it was.”

“Who was it?”

“…Soarin.”

Ditzy blinked, “Seriously? She’s dating a Wonderbolt?”

“She said it had something to do with a client in Canterlot, a party, one thing leads to another…” Dash shrugged, “They look happy together.”

“…Is that why you missed work today?” Ditzy’s voice softened, “Because…”

“I wasn’t jealous. I sort of kind of knocked over a bunch of tables in excitement and dropped a plate of pasta on Rarity’s head.” Dash paused, “That tends to be a bit of a problem.”

“What kind?”

“Why are you asking that?” Dash stared at the mare, a slight scowl on her face, “Out of all the things you’re asking it’s ‘What pasta did you knock onto Rarity?’ not like, ‘Oh, and after you knocked the ravioli castrato onto Rarity’s head you went to the bar?’?”

“That was the next question,” Ditzy deadpanned, “Time Turner was waiting for you at the bar?”

“Well… yYeah,” Dash shrugged before continuing on, “We usually go drinking on that day.”

“Every single one?”

“Well… yeah,” Dash admitted, glass in hoof, “Unless one of us has to do something el… wWhere are you going with this?” Dash’s tone shifted from conversational to demanding as she slammed the glass back onto the table.

“…I want to know what your plans with Time Turner are.” Ditzy firmly replied.

“We’re friends.”

“…I don’t think so.” Ditzy shook her head, “Even I don’t spend that much time with him.”

“You have lunch and dinner with him, several times a week.” Dash countered.

“Which doesn’t involve us getting drunk and having to sleep in Berry’s spare rooms.”

“I need a refill.” Dash stood up and trotted over to the sink.

“…You like him don’t you?” Ditzy stated. Dash’s eyes widened as she dropped the cup. “No, don’t say anything, you do.”

“What are you talking about?” Dash responded, her voice laced with panic.

“You like Time Turner.”

“N... nNo I don’t.”

“I listen to the way he talks about you,” Ditzy continued, her voice low and accusing.

“...” Dash returned to the table and sat, avoiding the other mare’s gaze.
“Ditzy, we’re friends, right?”

“We are.”

“…I don’t know how to say this without making you mad, but…” Dash sighed, “I really like Turner.”

“Well duh,” Ditzy rolled her eyes, “You don’t go drinking with people you don’t l-”

“No I mean I like him. Like Big Mac and Cloudchaser like.”

“…You know, most ponies would just use the word ‘love’.” Ditzy snarked.

“…Well… .I mean… um…”

“I’m not dating him.” Ditzy replied.

“…Say what?”

“I’m not in love with Time Turner,” Ditzy stated, “We’re friends.”

“But…”

“We tried,” Ditzy chuckled, “He’s romantic at heart, but I’m…” Ditzy’s eyes briefly aligned as she looked down, “…A realist. It clashed too much.”
The mare looked back up at Dash, a smile returning to her face, “You want him? Then go get him.”

“…What am I even going to say?” Dash admitted, “We’re like… it’s… iIt’s like if Pinkie and the egghead got together, you know?”

“Just try.” Ditzy responded, “You’d be surprised.”

“…Is that why you came over? To let me know you’re okay with this?”

“Basically.”

“How did you even find ou…” Dash trailed off as realization hit her, “Rarity told you, didn’t she?”

“Indeed.”

“But why would she tell you that?”

“Ah… now that is a story…” Ditzy chuckled, “…You notice how Time Turner gets mopey sometimes?”

“Usually after a few shots of Tequila, yeah.” Dash admitted.

“…Well, one day he was complaining about not having a special somepony.”

“Is this after the whole thing with Cloudchaser and Mac and that love poison thing?” Dash asked, “Because I really want to know why the egghead thought it was a good idea to lend them that book.”

“No, this is after that. When they started dating for real,” Ditzy continued on, “He was a bit mopey about how everyone has their special someponies.”

“…So you went to Rarity’s to tell her you wanted me to be his special somepony? And then she told you?”

“Well… yeah,” Ditzy shrugged.

“…I shouldn’t have told her,” Dash muttered, “This is going to end up is some ridiculous Conscious River scenario.”

“Oh, I love her books,” Ditzy interrupted, “She… how do you know that she writes romance novels?”

“I… uUh…” Dash looked away, “I read them too.”

“…You should join the book club.”

“There’s a book club?”

“Cheerilee runs it. So far it’s just me, Rarity, and Cloudchaser… I probably should not have said that.”

“…Seriously?” Dash stared in disbelief, “Chaser? A book club for a romance writer sounds like something out of a really bad porno.”

Ditzy opened her mouth to respond, but instead closed it again and shook her head, “Nevermind.”

“Anyway…” Dash paused, “Thanks.”

“I want my friends to be happy,” Ditzy responded, “I should get going, I need to pick some things up before I go home today.”

Ditzy stood up and trotted towards the door

“…You do know what you’re getting yourself into, right?” Dash called out after her.

“…I think so, why?”

“Because you’re going to end up working with Rarity,” Dash reminded her, “You know, Miss-thinks-like-a-romance-novel?”

Ditzy pushed open the door, pausing in the doorway. “..….I know. But a bit of healthy realism and pragmatism is going to be more than enough of a counter for her.”

Ditzy stepped through the doorway, closing the door behind her. Dash sighed and smiled.

“Glad to have a friend like her.”

Outside, Ditzy sat down, rubbing her head with her hooves.

“…This is going to suck.”

Comments

[dramatic_spoon]

Ditzy was suppose to be a bit more trolly, with most of her dialogue dancing around and hinting that she knew the truth, but it felt a bit too out of character.
Which then shortened the chapter tremendously.

There's also a dirty reference in it, but I'm not going to tell you what it is until the next chapter.
Unless you figure it out before then.

[Luna Secret Stallion]

4939206 Does it have to do with porn?

[dramatic_spoon]

4939517

No.

[SageBrony07]

Nice chapter. I think it was funny with Derpy giving her blessing to Dash. Good luck writing the next chapter.