Confusion

by Lonice

Fluctuations At 01%

Author's Note:

Well, I've been busy with a lot lately, such as school and other stuff. Yeah. Finally got a break, but it's almost over. Of course, that means summer is ever so closer, but given circumstances I won't be able to dedicate myself to this as I had been doing. Anyways, hope you enjoy the new chapter! Constructive criticism is extremely appreciated! (And hey, maybe I've learned something from my English classes this year!)

I've only been walking around my room for an hour, but I still feel as though I just spent an entire day running. I think I might pass out...

Then why don't you stop and rest?

Because I think better if I'm walking... I think.

Great, so you don't even really know why you're walking.

Exactly. Now, what do you think Discord meant earlier?

That could be a range of things. I'm not entirely certain of anything, though.

Great... Could he have been talking about Echoe? No, I doubt that... What the hell did he mean?! I... I think I get that the Bearers of the Elements want to be my friends... Hell, it's what they basically live to do! I... I tried that once... To be a peace keeper... A pacifist in a world of war...

Careful... Neither one of us want you to lose yourself to that Shard again... We'll have to find a way to dispose of it. Or learn how to control it completely.

Yeah, sorry 'bout that... Bad memories... The worst part was that the "wars" were just my family having conflicts and dividing themselves... They... They didn't see the consequences it'd have on me... Not the negative ones...

Sorry... Forgot, gotta fight it, right? I'll do what I can... Now... Any other ideas?

"Ajil? Are you alright? You've been walking in here for more than an hour... Ajil?" I hear Twilight ask, her voice emanating from my left. Again, with the concerned look on her face...

"Yeah, I'm fine. Trust me... I just need to think about what Discord had asked me" I say, now feeling as though I shouldn't have mentioned it... That regret is probably because of Twilight's curious look...

"What did he do this time?" Twilight asks, sincerely curious as to what Discord had said he asked that would make me so nervous. Great, just great, that's a sign she's trying to get closer... This is why I hate talking to people... I always say something I'm going to regret. Now I doubt I have much of a choice...

"He asked me if I've 'noticed it too,' but it's really vague.. Also, do you have any idea why I'm able to use magic so easily, because I don't normally have as much control over it as I did earlier?" I ask.

"I have a general idea. It's probably the Magical Field. Recently, there have been a lot of unusual fluctuations in the field, to the point that if one wanted to, somepony could build an entire city just by thinking of it," Twilight informs me. Upon seeing my worried look, she tries to reassure me with "Don't worry, nothing like this has happened anywhere near Ponyville. There are a few other towns and cities that have yet to endure these fluctuations, too. Besides, if one does occur in Ponyville, I think that, with Discords help, that Ponyville citizens will manage to survive," Twilight finishes.

"Magical... Field..." I say, sounding like a complete dumbass... What the hell am I doing now? "It sounds important... I assume that it's what we draw our magic abilities from, right?" I ask. Okay, that makes a lot more sense.

"Yeah, you're right about that. Though it also fuels the bad parts of magic. You could say it's a neutral source. Unicorns have fought among themselves over it in the past, though, when there were much more drastic fluctuations. Those fluctuations had the potential, without a pony harnessing it, to obliterate entire countries. So it isn't really odd for them to effect you, considering you weren't here when they first occurred. One legend says that a pony created Discord himself during a fluctuation," Twilight informed me. But now I wonder...

"So... This is just hypothetical," I say, continuing, "But what if somebody, or somepony, could create these fluctuations?" I ask.

"Oh, well that's obvi-" Twilight stops, shock filling her face, and she races down the room, shouting something about "Drill for one percent, hurry!"

I try to chase her down the stair well, but she's already teleported herself. I run so fast down the stairwell that I almost fall down them, and when I do start to, I catch myself with my hand and do a flip.

I finally reach the main room, where I see the Cutie Mark Crusaders attempting to fit into a door that I don't recall being there before. "Hu-wha?" I ask stupidly. When Apple Bloom sees me, she shrieks and quickly forces herself into the door way. "What did I do?!" I shout, and then I hear a soft "tp" of a footstep behind me.

I leap forward and twist around mid air, to see Enar standing there, facing me. "You can't escape me, you twit! Killing you off will begin the process to corrupt Applejack without the use of Discord's magic! You can not escape this fa-" Enar begins to say, but is cut off when my fist collides with his jaw, flames engulfing it.

"You won't be doing that, Enar. You will have to kill me to get to any of those ponies. And believe me, I am not that easy to kill anymore," I state, my face dead serious as Enar smirks.

I feel two sets of hooves slam into my back, and turn my head to see both Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle attacking me with their hooves. The look on both of their faces are shock, horror, and fear. They aren't controlling themselves, that much is clear. Though I didn't even feel a magical presence emanate from Enar, like I should have. There wasn't even an aura! There still isn't, yet he's controlling their actions!

The two fillies continue to slam their hooves into my back, and I feel one of them hold my neck down, forcing me to face the floor, and one of the two emit a small whimper. "Shut up, animal. You are meant to follow orders. You will do so," Enar said, the cruelty ringing throughout his voice.

"Enar... When I get out of this... I... I will ring your pathetic neck! Do you hear me?! I will make you wish I'd just end your pathetic, meaningless life! I'd...! I'd..." Damn it, I lost it again! I have to watch it, there's fucking kids around! Shit, he's going to kill Applebloom! Fuck!

"No!" I shout, and I hear the sound of a short sword being drawn. I can't let her die like this.

"Prepare to die, p-" Enar begin, but was tackled by Applebloom, who, after knocking down Enar, slammed her hooves on his wrists a few times. "You son of a bitch! You broke my fucking wrists! What the fucking hell is wrong with you?!" Enar began shouting, and I noticed that Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle had loosened their threatening grips, and were now hugging me to death. I seriously can't breathe.

"Let go. I have something to finish," I say, and the two fillies flinch back. I guess I had put a bit of hatred into that statement. If I hadn't thought of Applebloom fighting back, she might not have. Is this the power of fluctuations? To force someone or somepony to perform actions against their will? It doesn't matter.

I walk over to Enar, where he lies, cursing at Applebloom at the top of his lungs until he sees me, silencing himself. "Applebloom, get your friends into the door. Now." I say, and they all quickly proceed into the doorway, where they seemingly vanish. I feel Despise form in my right hand, and I grab it with both hands, and stab it into Enar's chest.

"Hahaha! I'm not affected by flames! Don't you realize? This power to manipulate the fluctuations... We have an advantage. I'll let you think about it. World domination is quite tantalizing, after all, isn't it, false me?" Enar asks. Damn, how the fuck does he know how to piss me off so easily?! I look down to see that he has vanished, presumably into a stream of fire, escaping me.

I hope Applebloom and the others are safe. I can feel my energy draining from me, faster, faster, until... The world is spinning, a massive blur. I hear voices, but I can't make them out that well. I assume they're shouting at me. "Applebloom... Doorway..." I manage to say, hoping they get the idea. Black engulfs my vision and I fall to the ground, with a thud. My head still feels as though it's spinning. Is this my curse for every time I use magic?

The next thing I know, I'm being put onto what I assume is by bed, probably by magic. I hear Applejack say "Twi', Ah gotta talk ta' him sometime. What Applebloom just told me, Ah... Ah thank it'd be best if he had some tahm to himself. Ah'll explain when we're all away from him," and then the door opens, and slams close. I seriously don't think I'm going to like this. I try to sit up, opening my eyes to only see black.

"Twilight... Applejack... What... Happened?" I ask, trying to transmit my voice to them. I doubt it will work. I'm only a human. A human in a land meant for ponies, pegasi, and unicorns. A land I don't belong to. I'm trapped here, though. This world is my eternal prison, and Enar is making sure that it seems like one.

There are two soft knock, knock's from my door. "Come... In..." I manage to gasp, and I balance my breathing. "I, uh... I can't really see who it is. I can't see a thing..." I say. I hope to god that it isn't a fucking assassin.

"So... Ya'll ain't the thing thaht trahed ta' kill me?" I hear Appleblooms voice, and my heart sinks. Enar, you... After what she's been through, she doesn't need anymore trauma... Focus... I can feel tears coming from my eyes...

"I'd... I'd never purposely try to hurt you, Applebloom. You, your family, your friends... I could never hurt any of them on purpose... Not after what I've gone through. I can't hurt ponies who don't need to be involved. The most I can do is try to protect. No, I have to protect you ponies. It's the least I can do to repay you... Twilight... I..." I say, allowing myself to break. Why? I was happy with my purpose on Earth. Here, in Equestria, the closest thing to my purpose is just... Trying to maintain peace... And the last time I did that...

---

"Dude, what the fuck?" I ask my friend, Jacob, sitting next to me. His brown hair sticks to his white head as he turns to me.

"I asked if I could borrow a dollar," he says, holding my wallet in the air. He looks concerned, sincerely. I wonder if it's an act. I've had bad experiences with you, Jacob.

Jacob continues to pull away with my wallet, and my hand is immediately clasped on his wrist. What the fu- "Hell fucking no you don't. I've told you countless fucking times, I don't got the damn money, Jacob Aris Colits. So, back the fuck off." What the fucking hell?! Who the fuck are you?!

"Dude, come on, don't be that guy! Nobody likes that guy, and we both know this! So be a pall, and let me borrow at least-" Jacob began, but was cut off by my fist landing square in his throat... SHIT! You could've fucking killed him, you bastard! Hello? Where the fuck are you?!

---

"AAAAAAGH!!!" I shout, breaking the silence of the night. I'm sweating and panting, my clothing filthy. I look around and see nobody, and nopony, so I should just go back to sleep.

I look around, the emptiness surrounding me. "You know you want it, Ajil. World domination, only requiring the death of one. Believe me, it is worth it. Normally thousands would be forced to be killed through warfare, but we have the power to force them into submission. Trust me. You know you want more power. I know you do," I hear Enar's voice echo. Shut up, you lying coward.

"Hello, Human representative of Earth! I understand that you are a complete moron. You know, I thought you'd know better than to use the fluctuations. At one percent, and you can only control a ponies physical movement? You and Enar are both jokes. Yes, you heard right, jokes! I can manipulate the thought process of Discord himself with one percentage of a fluctuation! Hell, if I didn't know better, I'd say God sent your asses here to kill you off." I hear Echoe say. Get out of my head, damn it!

Light floods my vision as I hear my door close. I can tell that there's whispering, but I'm not sure who it is. I should probably... "Ungh..." Is the noise I emit when I move my arm a small bit.

"Oh, thank Celestia, you're okay!" I hear Twilight say, and I can hear her hooves hitting the ground at a speed that would suggest that she's running towards me. I hear her skid to a halt beside my bed, her hooves wrapping around me as though she's trying to hug me. "I thought you... You were..." Twilight begins to say, but I interrupt her.

"I refuse to die, because I've promised myself something. I..." I pause and clear my throat, which leads to a little bit of coughing before I continue with "I made a promise. Until Enar and any other threat I have brought with me is incapable of returning, I have to protect all of you ponies. It is my responsibility to fix the problems that I have created. It isn't a choice, it's common sense, so don't try to stop me," I finish, my eyes open enough that I can see a shocked Twilight, her face wet with tears. I didn't expect that either, so I get why she's so shocked.

A living hell. That's what is has to be like for her. Especially now that I'm fucking shit up... They don't deserve this. As soon as I have the supplies, I'm running, and finding Enar and killing him. After that, I can rest peacefully, and if the ponies feel as though they need to get rid of me, I'll willingly leave. No, I will have to leave, it isn't a choice. I will kill my foe, bring him down to hell, even if I have to go with him.

"Well, well. Looks like I have learned your magical signature. So, Ajil, I've decided to teach you a special spell, and in a very special way, too. I think you'll find it... Intriguing," Discord says from behind me, his voice mysterious.

"What do you mean, and where did you come from?" I ask, shrugging off Twilight, who was still clinging to my left arm.

"I can teleport, and what I mean... Well, I'll use the teaching method now, and then explain. I feel as though you'll need this, even if it goes against my belief," Discord says, and he uses his talons to make a strange hexagonal shape upon my forehead, and it feels as though he writes something there. "There you go. What I just taught you is a spell," Discord begins explaining, his voice ominously dead serious, "and that spell, Ajil, can kill a living thing. The only negative side effect is that you will lose someone you love in return. I, of course, would know this better than anypony. Twilight, if you're wondering why, you could easily ask Celly. For now, I need to go," Discord finishes talking, and with a snap, a light engulfs him as he vanishes.

I can't believe it. How the fuck could Discord have ever felt an emotion like love?! I felt it plenty of times, and every time I'd approach them, they'd cast me the fuck out! Every single one of them! I was evaded, hated, fucking discriminated! If anything, I should be the one throwing a damn pity party, not him! He deserves to suffer, burn in hell, and watch the one he loves die a million ti-

"Ajil, what the hay's wrong with you?!" I hear Twilight shout the question at me, and I suddenly become aware of my actions. I stop my fists, that were on fire until now, from pummeling the ground, and when the dust settles it reveals that I've made a small ditch about a meter, or three feet, deep.

"I'm sorry, Twilight... I just... I..." I lost control... My knees are going limp... I can feel them ever so slowly falling to the ground. My legs have gone limp at this point... I've lost the connection to their nerves, for now. I... I can see Twilight walking towards me... "Don't... Don't touch me..." I manage to stutter the whisper out, and I fall to the floor, tears beginning to flow from my eyes... "Why? Why does this always happen... Why do I hurt the ones I love?" At this point I can feel Twilight's hoof on my cheek... Then the feeling is gone... "You... Still there?" I ask, beginning to turn around. Then a blinding light surrounds me...

"Wake up, Ajil!" I hear Twilight's voice as she begins slapping my face with her hoof... Wait... Maybe she's been slapping my face... My cheeks are kinda sore...

"Stop! Stop, stop, stop! Jeez, I'm up! What the heck do you need from me?!" I shout hastily. The look on her face is one of annoyance... Did I just explain to Twilight why I refuse to die in a dream? I wonder if she knows...

"You know where Sugar Cube Corner is, right Ajil? Apple Jack wanted you to meet her there. Sorry if I hurt your, uh... Face?" Twilight guessed. Apparently, the parameters of my face aren't that obvious. "I had told her I'd get you up today to have you try and meet her there. She said that she wanted to meet you alone, and even had to miss out on one of Pinkie's parties... We were all invited, but AppleJack had already made up her mind about meeting you. Now, if you don't mind, I'll be going!" Twilight said, a bright face upon her as she trotted outta the room, and eventually I hear the slam of the door.

I get up and focus on a pair of jeans and a long sleeved shirt... My head begins to ache as light gathers into a concentrated area, and suddenly... Fzz! Charred jeans and a charred long sleeved shirt... There isn't a smell to them, but they definitely won't be worn anytime soon. I walk over to the side of the room where a dresser seems to have appeared. I open it and see five different pairs of outfits, with a note... From Rarity, I guess. I open, and skim through it... Something about warning them.... Protecting Applebloom... And a signature... I don't really know how much time I have to read it, so I'll have to come back to it.

I quickly change into new clothes and rush down the stairs and out the door. I gently close it behind me, and walk towards Sugar Cube Corner... And now I feel awkward... A lot of these ponies are looking at me with fear... Some of them even have absolute hatred in their eyes... I just look down and pick up the pace... Probably in my best interests... I finally get close to the place, just to see Apple Jack sitting inside through one of the windows. She seems kinda bored, if I'm honest.

As I push the door open, Mr. Cake looks over to great me, but freezes upon seeing me, his eyes filling with fear, and then he ducks under the counter... All I can do is let out a massive sigh, and I walk over towards Apple Jack. I get to the seat and sit down... Incidentally, the seats work well for both ponies and humans. What a coincidence?

"So yah fahnally showed up. Ah'll be the first to admit Ah didn't know if yah were recovered enough, but Ah guess yah are. Ah was hopin' that yah'd be up t'a helpin' mah family rebuild its barn, considerin' that blasted Enar fellah burnt it down..." Apple Jack states. I can feel the expression on my face change... I think that Apple Jack noticed, because she immediately tells me "Y'all don't have t'a if yah ain't feelin' up t'a it.
Ah was jus' wantin' to get t'a know yah a bit more."

I feel my shoulders slouch down a little, as I say "Look, I dunno if I should be around Applebloom with what Enar did-" I cut myself short when I see Apple Jack's look of concern... The worry in those eyes... They've already became attached to me... Shit. I was in hopes to prevent this! Gah!

"Look, I'll help you rebuild your barn... I don't know how Applebloom will react though, and I won't guarantee that she won't react badly... And don't be harsh on her. The worst thing to do to a sibling is scold them when they act out of fear... I... I would know..." I say, and I can't help but remember the last time I talked to my brother... I had yelled at him because he didn't show up at the hospital when our mother had a heart attack... He was just afraid that she would die while he was there... If I recall right, he did get back in touch with her, but I didn't hear from him again... And now I probably won't.

"Ajil? Are yah there?" Apple Jack asks me, snapping me back to reality. I spaced out...

"Yeah, I was just thinking about my brother... I... Don't want to talk about it..." I state... My heart's aching now... It'll be good to distract myself with some kind of work. "When should we head out to work on the barn?" I ask. Apple Jack blinks, almost as though she's surprised.

"Well, Ah still gotta get a few supplahs, but after that, yah should be able to head on over and start helpin'," Apple Jack said, seeming to assume that I knew my way to her farm...

"Uh... Well, I don't really know how to get to your farm from here, so... Er..." I said, and Apple Jack nodded in understanding.

"Just take a left when yah leave here, and keep on walkin'. Yah should reach it 'ventually. I gotta go now," Apple Jack said, walking out the door and turning to the right and walking down the street.

I was so lost in trying to see where she was headed that I didn't notice that Mrs. Cake had managed to get to the table...

"So..." Mrs. Cake began, her voice quivering just as much as her body, "You aren't the one that tried to kill us?" she asked me.

"No way. I brought that monster here, so I have to eliminate him. After I'm done helping Apple Jack, would you mind if I try to repair any damage he did here? I know I can't do much to help fix emotional trauma or stuff like that, but I should take responsibility for any physical damage he may have done," I say, Mrs. Cake looking relieved, her body relaxing.

"It's quite alright. Pinkie's already decided that she wants to rebuild the destroyed parts of the building herself. Something about making it more fun for when she's babysitting..." Mrs. Cake replies, a seemingly thoughtful smile on her face.

"Alright, well... I should probably get going... I guess I might end up seeing you again. Until then, bye!" I say as I get up to leave. I walk out the door and turn left, and start walking towards Apple Acres.

It's been almost thirty minutes since I had left Sugar Cube Corner, and I'm finally seeing apple trees in the distance. I have to admit that I didn't expect it to take so long. That, and I was starting to get physically exhausted. My feet had become sore a while back, and now I can feel it in my thighs... God, that hurts like hell. Well, it ought to be worth it. I hope it'll help start to break the distrust Enar no doubt caused. I hope.

After ten more minutes, I can see the building that I assume is the Apple family's household. I truly hope so. The sun is finally getting pretty high. Seems like it's close to noon. I'm kinda getting hungry... Maybe I should've... No, I don't have any money, I wouldn't have been able to get anything at Sugar Cube Corner. Maybe I'll be able to get something to eat at the farm...

As I approach the gates to the farm, I look up to see three fillies running around, playing tag. They look like nothing's ever happened... Like all the shit they just went through was some fucked up nightmare, like none of it happened, like they could move on... So... Do ponies have some experiences like this in this world after all? Where they confront some kind of darkness, that seems to be coexisting with the good? Wait... Wouldn't that be Discord? Is that why they're so willing to forgive me, so ready to do so? Is that even right?! I don't know anymore...

"Are yah just gonna stand there, son?" I hear Granny Smiths unmistakable voice.

I turn to see here standing on the porch with her... Is it a walker? Fuck it, that's what I'm calling it. She's just smiling sweetly at me... She's older than most of the ponies around here. I wonder if she could help me...

"Well?" she continues.

"Sorry, was just thinking about stuff... Would you mind sharing some of your wisdom with me? I... I know I can't do this alone... I need someone's advice... My knowledge isn't anywhere enough. I know that, but... I feel like it's all my fault, and I can't do a thing to stop it... All this pain... The suffering they've gone through... Is it all worth it? Am I really that important? I can't be... No one should have to fear me because I can't reign in a split personality..." I vent... I think I might have said way to much there...

"Blaming yourself doesn't help anypony, deary. It only worsens circumstances for us all," Granny Smith offers... Well, she isn't wrong, but I'm not sure that that is the response I was hoping for. I guess... It'll do.

"I... I'm glad you tried to help... I think... I think it worked... At least a little. And that can make a world of difference later..." I say, hearing Granny Smith let out a few laughs at my response, before inviting me in for some food.

There's a lot of apple-oriented food, and they all seem to assume that Apple Jack would be eating elsewhere. I felt like... They seem to accept me as one of them... Even Applebloom. I'm... taken aback... I just... After what Enar's done... I didn't expect this. The only way for me to show gratitude is simply humbly accept the food they offer to me. I eat it gratefully and with the best manners I can manage... Probably not great manners, either, considering I was never taught the proper etiquette... They probably find this attempt laughable, but they seem to know it's the best I can try to do. Besides, they probably aren't good on what most would consider 'Fine-Dining Manners'. They're farmers, after all, which meant they were stronger rather than refined. Though I wasn't really either... I guess the term 'Nice-guy' would be fitting for me, considering I'd try not to be an ass most of the time.

After we finish eating, and I put my dishes in the sink, I head right out, and immediately ask Bic Macintosh "Are we going to start working on the barn soon?" He looks up at me, and nods yes, and continues carrying supplies. I can see Applebloom and the other family members that were in the area with a lot of barn supplies... The only supply that seemed to be missing was...

"Hey ya'll! Ah'm fahnally back with tha paint!" Apple Jack shouts from the gate... And she really is pulling a small cart of paint. Well, that should prove useful.

It takes a while to set up the new barn, and even longer to paint it. Finally, we finish, only to see the sun setting in the background... I can feel my entire body aching, like it was being torn apart at every connection of muscle... God, this hurts like fucking hell.

Needless to say, I had more apple-type foods that I didn't bother to learn the name of. It was delicious, especially for food that I'm sure as hell not used to.

Since it was already dark out by the time we finished eating, they offered me a place to sleep. I accepted the offer, and then Apple Jack tells me "All right then, ya'll can just use the guest room across from mah room, sugarcube." That actually sounds like a good idea. She has seen what Enar is capable of, and if he were to try a surprise attack on me, she would probably be the best suited to face off against him.

I enter the dim-lit room, and look around. The bed seems basic, thin blue sheets as a blanket, white pillows... A small little desk. Huh. Seems recently made, and atop it is a wax candle, giving off enough light for me to walk to the bed. I lay down and lean over to blow out the light. And just like that, I'm engulfed in sleep.

No dreams... Just nightmares... A pattern in each one... Every pony that was effected by Enar in any negative way saw me as a monster, and wasn't afraid of sharing that with me. And it seems like Princess Luna doesn't want to or just can't talk right now... Didn't she say that her curse for making these dreams for every being was to be forced to watch them? I feel really bad for her. I just don't get how they could forgive me... All this destruction... Isn't my fault? For all of this pain and suffering? I could have disposed of Enar long ago, but... I didn't... I could have put myself on medication, and at least postponed this, hopefully long enough for until I was able to go home... That's right... I have to find a way home... Maybe defeating Enar will help me do that...

Suddenly, I feel a warm glow across the front of my body as I'm sitting in a chair around a bonfire, with my family... I feel like I can hear Princess Luna's voice in my mind saying "I thought you might like a change in the scenario." I have to admit, the change is appreciated. It remains like that for the rest of the night, until I finally wake up to a loud bell.

It doesn't take long for me to realize somethings off. Almost immediately, I realize the air feels off. I shrug it off, and head down to see what's for breakfast.

As I walk down the stairs, it feels like each step doubles my weight, until I collapse... I take a few deep breaths and feel my forehead... Thankfully, nowhere near enough for a fever. I take a few more deep breaths before getting up slowly and heading down to breakfast.

Surprisingly, they have a strange 'Bread Cereal' type thing, which I eat gratefully and quickly. The others eat quickly too, maybe just because it's how they eat breakfast, or they think I'm making a competition out of it. It's actually kinda funny, how this shit's all seeming to work out.

I slam my thatched bowl down and let out a hearty burp, as the rest of the Apple Family does the same. "Wow. Ah don't thahnk Ah've ever seen somepony eat faster than... Than..." Applebloom begins, but then her eyelids seem to shut themselves, and she collapses onto the floor besides the table.

"Applebloom!" I shout, running over to her side... I don't know anything about ponies or how they work, so this could be natural... And she had shown no sign of exhaustion... In fact... I'm... feeling woozy too... The whole world... Seems to be... Spinning... And my head... God, what kind headache is this?! It feels like someone just struck my temple with a steel girder at terminal fucking velocity! And this nauseous feeling... I seriously think I might vomit... And my vision... Everything is getting darker... A black void from the outsides of my eyes... Is enclosing... My... Vision...