• Member Since 25th Mar, 2012
  • offline last seen Yesterday

Jar of Dirt

Snitches be snitchin, bitches be bitchin, snitches in stitches, bitches in ditches

Jar of Dirt Joined 25th Mar, 2012 · Offline

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Princess Celestia orders the invasion of Earth. Things don't go as planned.
Chapters (1)
Complete Published: May 7th, 2014 Download
1,222 words
Comments ( 496 )
Chaos Nightmare
Chaos Nightmare #1 · May 7th, 2014 · · 1 ·
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What no saxton hale joke?

Battle154
Battle154 #2 · May 7th, 2014 · · ·
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Um......I don't know what to say....this is.....um...... I don't know what to say.

Pyriel
Pyriel #3 · May 7th, 2014 · · ·
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... You forgot the random tag.

TheFireman
TheFireman #4 · May 7th, 2014 · · 1 ·
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Yep, this seems fairly accurate.

RedvsBlue327
RedvsBlue327 #6 · May 7th, 2014 · · ·
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4354829 I dunno... Murica didn't have nearly enough explosions.

RoadRunneR
RoadRunneR #8 · May 7th, 2014 · · ·
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The ponies invade?

You have my baguette.

a-hon-hon-hon.

JBL
JBL #9 · May 7th, 2014 · · ·
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This is the greatest thing ever written. EVER.

TheFireman
TheFireman #10 · May 7th, 2014 · · ·
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4354860
Huh, you're right! Call Michael Bay!

Blood Brandy
Blood Brandy #11 · May 7th, 2014 · · ·
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I think, as our planets secret, super hard Hidden Boss Dungeon level of a country/continent, Australia could have had a bit more...

Iroh Legoman
Iroh Legoman #12 · May 7th, 2014 · · ·
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Well then,... i didnt think i would like this, but yet...
:rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:

Please explain what the English said i cant understand a bloody word they said ?
(see what i did there?)

viconis
viconis #13 · May 8th, 2014 · · ·
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You so deserve more thumbs up.

Bemmo
Bemmo #14 · May 8th, 2014 · · ·
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"Onwards, my loyal men! Show them the superiority of your GENETICS!"

Suddenly, the ground started to shake as hundreds of 300-pound lardasses started rolling down the hill towards the Equestrian army, causing their ranks to scatter and flee from the oncoming disaster.

Oh God I laughed too much and choked on my tongue.

UnknownSoldat
UnknownSoldat #15 · May 8th, 2014 · · ·
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Make more!! Please, make more, I never laughed so much!

Comment posted by Synthetic Soul deleted May 13th, 2014
Comment posted by dark_zero deleted May 8th, 2014
Arxsys
Arxsys #19 · May 8th, 2014 · · 1 ·
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Probably the best and most retarded TCB story out there. I award the author one thousand points lol

PaladinOfChaos
PaladinOfChaos #20 · May 8th, 2014 · · ·
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I feel stupid. I forgot about how obama is drawn in political cartoons; when you said that his ears were flapping in the wind I thought you meant that everyone was a pony.

Arxsys
Arxsys #21 · May 8th, 2014 · · 5 ·
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4355426 :rainbowlaugh: between his ears and all the hot air he spews, Obama would make a great kite :rainbowlaugh:

Kalbim
Kalbim #22 · May 8th, 2014 · · ·
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BEST. STORY. EVER.

The Grey Pegasus
The Grey Pegasus #23 · May 8th, 2014 · · ·
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This is so stupid that I love it. Forget trying to quote any part of the story, just read the damn thing again. It's only 1k.

Flutter-Sparks
Flutter-Sparks #24 · May 8th, 2014 · · ·
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Normally I don't read this kind of stuff, but I was bored and I found it amusing. :twilightsmile:
so I give it a like.

Orangecraz
Orangecraz #25 · May 8th, 2014 · · ·
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Plot: 0/10 :ajbemused:

Character development: 0/10 :fluttercry:

Climax: 0/10 :raritydespair:

Originality: 10000/10 :rainbowhuh:

Overall score: 10000/40 :trollestia:

:heart::moustache::heart::moustache::heart::moustache::heart::moustache::heart::moustache:

BlueBastard
BlueBastard #26 · May 8th, 2014 · · ·
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What the fuck did I just read and why do I like it so much:rainbowhuh:

DreamKitsune
DreamKitsune #27 · May 8th, 2014 · · ·
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What, no Canadians politely beating the ponies to death with hockey sticks? For shame, eh?:rainbowlaugh:

Herr Director
Herr Director #28 · May 8th, 2014 · · ·
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:rainbowlaugh:This is hilarious!:rainbowlaugh:

Good show sir, jolly good show!:moustache:

Minerva
Minerva #29 · May 8th, 2014 · · ·
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This was better than I thought it was gonna be.

With his powerful ghetto magic, Obama tightened his hold on the kid as patriotic energies swirled around them. With a mighty cry of "CHANGE!", Obama infused the young man with so much freedom that all his wounds healed. The president helped the kid to his feet before raising a mighty finger towards the ponies.

This made me lose my shit with laughter.:rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:

Dubious
Dubious #30 · May 8th, 2014 · · ·
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You forgot New Zealand. We'd make them too relaxed to even bother trying to kill all humans.

Good Christian Ethesto
Good Christian Ethesto #31 · May 8th, 2014 · · ·
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Good thing I was already Autistic before reading this.

Greenbane
Greenbane #32 · May 8th, 2014 · · ·
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4355908

I thought this was funny.

To each his own, I guess.

Good Christian Ethesto
Good Christian Ethesto #33 · May 8th, 2014 · · ·
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4355938
I thought it was mildly funny too because I have autism. Sorry if you misinterpreted that.

Silber-Baren
Silber-Baren #34 · May 8th, 2014 · · ·
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At their forefront stood Barack Obama, his ears flapping in the wind

:rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:
Best quote ever......

Greenbane
Greenbane #36 · May 8th, 2014 · · ·
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4355957

Oh ok.
On a side note your halo man series is hilarious.

Bambisbb
Bambisbb #38 · May 8th, 2014 · · ·
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Y U LEAVE OUT CANADA?!

Even though I'm from 'Merica....

Isaac3924
Isaac3924 #39 · May 8th, 2014 · · ·
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My dear beautiful G-d, what is this piece of shit that I just read, and how come I can't stop laughing at it?

You magnificent bastard!

USSOakland
USSOakland #40 · May 8th, 2014 · · ·
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i have no words,

∞/10

:pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy:

glue_maker
glue_maker #41 · May 8th, 2014 · · ·
Reply

the ground started to shake as hundreds of 300-pound lardasses started rolling down the hil

the greatest freedom in the world the freedom to weigh as much as a sumo wrestler without trying



i.imgur.com/S05TDdB.jpg

Doctor Fluffy
Doctor Fluffy #43 · May 8th, 2014 · · ·
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I'm not sure what happened but I think we won... :rainbowderp:

Das_Hooter
Das_Hooter #45 · May 8th, 2014 · · ·
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this iS GOLD!!! MOAR I SAY!

The Harvester
The Harvester #46 · May 8th, 2014 · · ·
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I have no idea what I just read but I like it!

shalrath
shalrath #47 · May 8th, 2014 · · ·
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4356599

It be six bong ya ha-shilling knackers!


story is missing "Awesome" tag btw.

Jormungandr
Jormungandr #49 · May 8th, 2014 · · 1 ·
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Much more plausible than the source story's... uh, everything.

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