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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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This looks like a beta version of your next long fic, I like it.
the story that this could become oh well nice one shot. I'll take what I can get of good writing skills
This would be a pretty good piece if there was some actual context behind it.
Why did the ponies (And Celestia apparently) murder millions of humans in the first place?
Why are Shining and Cadance not married anymore?
Why are the human's using swords and bows, is it set in the dark ages? Or have we simply ran out of ammo?
Stories like this need that type of context, otherwise it just ends up looking confusing and slightly lazy.
No offense
4156871
Yeah, it's one shot I made under about less than an hour. I am a very lazy writer, who can't write to save his life in general. I guess it would need context. And I guess it really isn't mystery I guess if so little has been explained.
It's a medieval setting.
By all means, someone who is clearly a better writer than me and can write their own version of this lazily made story I made if they want.
4156887 Was it an AU evil Celestia who did the killing?
Still a nice story, though.
4157048
Yes.
Um, when you have a country run by royalty... if they and the rest of the government order a general to stand down and he refuses... HE is the one rebelling and starting a civil war. Not the bulk of the government. You COMPLETELY reversed Celestia and Shining's positions.
4157164
Yeah, I guess. That makes sense.
Another reason someone should write a better version of this story, using this very concept.
This was much more serious than I though it would be. kudos.
I think the story ending was to short
4157164 that's generally counted as treason when a general ignores orders from his superiors.
4397841 Well, yes. Generally rebelling against your government and starting a civil war is considered treason... unless you win. Then it is a righteous revolution.
4398198 isn't it...wait a minute...do i know you from somewhere...?Paris...?V for vendetta,you say?you started a revolution in France! :D
And then, upon seeing her, they committed suicide due to extreme fear.
6710976
[Sousaphone intensifies]